The worst part of not being in a relationship right now? Not having someone to hold me while I shake during a PTSD moment.
They're scary sometimes, and hurt all the time, and I ache afterward, but the worst part is going through them alone, when all you want is someone to put their arms around you so you can feel safe.
I love my online friends, and I'm super grateful for their support, and I've been pretty lucky at finding someone to talk to when things have been bad, but I ache sometimes for a pair of actual arms around me, holding me and supporting me.
Ah, well.
Comments
Someone to hold me...
I hear ya, Dotty. I've been alone most of my life (relationship-wise). While I don't have PTSD, I've suffered from bouts of depression ever since my teens, and having someone to hold at those times would be nice... especially during the stronger ones.
At least now I have someone in my life I hope will be able to fulfill that role someday, although it's not the main reason I wanted someone in my life. Before she came into my life, I'd given up hope years ago, which is a terrible feeling. But you don't know when someone will come into your life and turn out to be special. Stay strong. Trust yourself. You've survived so much. You have wells of strength you didn't know you had. When you do finally meet that special someone you can share your burdens with (along with the joys), consider it a bonus powerup the game of life threw your way.
Angel Lisa
Team Dorothy