I am a person who doubts almost everything. probably because I already believe in two completely impossible things already, and despite what Alice in Wonderland recommended, that's probably my limit, or maybe even over it.
What makes my impossibilities even harder to deal with is the fact that they are regarded as totally incompatible with each other in the sense that people who have tried to assure me that one is impossible, almost always believe that the other exists.
What are these two impossibilities?
Simple. The existence of God, and the existence of Dorothy.
Its true. People who would never question the existence of God sometimes tell me I'm allowing a storm of emotions run my life when it comes to Dorothy, and people who shake their heads at the concept of God find no problem at all in accepting that I am female based on my own say-so and no other evidence.
But I believe both. I need both.
I ache to be closer to God, to be told by Him that not only does He love me, He's proud of me, pleased with me, and the prospect of His disappointment or disapproval frightens and depresses me.
At the same time, every time I've doubted the existence of a female heart in this male body, I despair, and every time I've tried to put Dorothy in a box I've paid a heavy price for it, one I dont think I could ever pay again and survive it.
Ah, well. So it goes.
Comments
Why does it matter?
Be the best you, you can. If there is a god, which I doubt, then you are surely doing what he wants. If there isn't, then you're doing what you want. Providing you're doing ether of these it's okay, it's when you're doing what others want, you lose sight of yourself. If that's what you want to do, become a Buddhist.
Angharad
One or the other
My subject is a falsehood here. You can have both. You can believe in God and be Dorothy at the same time. You are who you are. God does not look at the outside of you but what is on the inside and if you are Dorothy on the inside then that is who he sees.
Doubt is human nature
Look into philosophy, or if you want a shortcut type "I doubt therefore I am" into google. If ever you stop doubting yourself then you might have a problem.
I try not to confuse God with Religion
I don't believe God has one true religion. Religion is where all the dogma comes into it. You can ONLY do it THIS way is absurd. If you live your life as a good person and treat others well, I can't imagine that not being good enough.
My scientific brain doesn't believe there is a God, but that we should still be good to each other. My spiritual side isn't quite sure, but doesn't believe that ANY one religion is the RIGHT one. You just have to find the one that's right for you.
{{Hugs}}
logic
Your scientific brain isn't that scientific. By logic "God" is an entity that was either created or maintained by humans belief in it. Proving the entity exists has been done. Proving that the entity does not exist however is highly improbable.
Reguardless of your beliefs all you really have to do is stop focusing on yourself and look around. I mean REALLY look at everything hard. Once you have it is pretty hard to believe that us rather warlike humans could accomplish so much on our own.
Logic?
There is no proof that any entity exists, proving it doesn't is easier than proving it does. However, as we make such decisions based upon emotion not logic, it's all irrelevant - you either believe or you don't. Until there is actual evidence, I don't.
Angharad
No need to be rude about it
I didn't say you were wrong or say anyone should believe differently. I'm entitled to believe however I choose as you are. Your facts aren't my facts.
I'm leaving it here as this isn't what DC's blog is about anyways.
{{Hugs}}
Faith
I saw a small note one day it said NO God, No us....God Us
I certainly believe in God and thus my being is because there is a God. I've been where you are, broken and doubtful. There are those who don't believe and those that may believe if they see proof.
My faith has kept me going, its called blind faith but what lies in my heart and mind tells me there is a God.
If I told you the complete story of my life you would understand why my faith is so deep. My early day and early adult years were near death experiences. I wanted to die, a suicide by enemy was my chosen way. In war I was never shot or hit with shrapnel from rockets. I was angry when I came home from war, I wanted to die. I kept volunteering for life threatening duties and made it through. Not because I am so good, but because God has had his hands around me for a long time.
I am a born again Christian and I'll never deny Jesus or God. I have my life because God gave it to me. I am intersexed and do not feel as an abomination yet I feel closer to God and Jesus since I laerned to like myself for who I am. Dorothy you exist and God exist, quit believing the nay sayers go with your heart.
Jill Micayla
Be kinder than necessary,Because everyone you meet
Is fighting some kind of battle.