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Editor Note: The images used for this story were purchased and used under royalty-free license* from iStockphoto.com . ~Sephrena
Author Note: Please email me at AngelJediGirl (at) gmail (dot) com before posting this story to any other site. Posting to a pay site is prohibited.

Comments and suggestions are also welcome at the above email address.

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Sarah Carerra Book 3: Concerto in A-

Chapter 3.02 - Dazzle

The second day of classes was nowhere near as exciting as the first. There was still a lot of discussion about Sarah around the school, and someone had even put up some posters of Sarah with the date of the concert on it. But it was apparent that things were starting to settle down.

Nobody had tried to do anything harsh all morning either. One football player had attempted to trip me while we passed each other in the hall, but I'd seen him coming and was able to avoid him when he stretched out his legs to catch mine. I glared at him when he did, and he actually looked a bit mollified for a moment before he turned and walked away. I had yet to see Jared Lumbart, but I had heard he was still blaming me for getting kicked out of school last year and for getting thrown out of the restaurant where we had seen each other over the summer. I knew I'd have to keep an eye out for him and his "close" friends.

When I sat down between Ethan and Emily in the cafeteria at lunch, I was happy to see that they had already found other friends to fill the table around us. I hadn't seen Kathy, Jane, or Ashley since school had let out for the summer, but I knew the smile on my face reflected the ones they were giving me as I sat down.

"Hi, Megan," Jane greeted me, followed closely by the other two. "I wasn't sure who we'd see when school started up again. That dress you wore yesterday was pretty."

"Thanks," I replied. This was the first time anyone had actually talked to me about the change since school started, and I was glad to see that they were okay with it. The three of them hadn't pushed me away last year, and the summer hadn't changed their feelings toward me at all. "Megan is here to stay," I informed them.

"So you're going to have the..." Kathy started, but her words caught in her throat. "The surgery and stuff?" she finally finished. She turned red immediately, but I smiled at her curiosity.

"Sort of," I told her. "I've already had surgery to...correct things." The eyes of all three of my friends flew open in shock, so I felt I should clarify for them. "I'm actually a girl. Genetically, I mean. Let's just say that I have everything that you three have, and nothing that Ethan does. The doctors just fixed me up the way my body was supposed to be."

We sat there in silence for a moment as they digested what I had told them. It definitely wasn't what they had expected me to say, even if it was the truth. Then, to cover the awkwardness, Jane pulled out a magazine in an attempt to change the subject.

"You know Sarah, right?" she asked me before holding up the magazine so that I could see the cover. This time it was my eyes that boggled! Staring back at me was a picture of Sarah. I knew that this magazine was supposed to be on newsstands today, and that there would be a number of copies waiting for me when I got home, but this was the first time I had seen the finished product of the magazine interview that I had done over a month ago.

I was breathless as I gazed at my picture gracing the cover of Dazzle. I yearned to rip the magazine out of her hands and pore over what it said! But I also knew that I couldn't look too excited, or it might make the three of them suspicious.

"Yes," I replied. "I've known her for most of my life."

Jane put the magazine down on the table, and started flipping through the pages until she found the spread with my pictures and the interview. "Is she as cool in real life as she is in this interview?"

I looked down at the page, but I didn't know how to answer the question.

"I don't know," I told her. "I haven't had a chance to read the article yet."

She passed the magazine to me, and I quickly started to devour it. It took me a full minute before I realized everyone was looking at me, hoping I would share.

"Read it!" Emily prodded, and I nodded before turning back to the magazine.

The article started out with some information about what Sarah had been up to. It talked about the many concerts I had already performed. It talked about the songs that had reached number one. It talked about how much she liked to interact with her fans. Eventually, it settled into the interview where they actually asked me questions.

"Why do you think you've had such quick success?" I read from the magazine. "Luck," I read the response I remembered giving. "I was lucky to have friends who dragged me to a party where my studio rep noticed me and offered me a chance to make a demo. But I'm still amazed at how popular I seem to be. I'm not sure why people like my music so much. I am grateful, though."

"Awww," Emily fawned at my answer while smiling at me. "I bet she has some awesome friends."

"I'm sure she does," I replied, returning her smile and then nodding to Ethan too. I did have amazing friends.

"More," Emily said, and gestured toward the magazine I had set down to take a bite of my food. Apparently I had been nominated to provide the entertainment while we ate. I swallowed and picked up the magazine once more.

"What sets you apart from other young women who have achieved success at a young age, then have gone on to ruin it with partying and bad behavior?" the next question read. I smiled and chuckled as I remembered the way the girl conducting the interview had asked the question. It was almost like she was trying to tell me to not become a 'bad' girl.

"What did she say?" Kathy asked. Apparently I had paused too long to reminisce.

I found my response on the page and read it to them. "I've never been a party girl," I read. "I'd much rather spend time with my friends at home or at a movie or doing something than go to a party. Drinking, drugs, or anything like that does not appeal to me at all. I think what sets me apart is my attitude toward life. I like to have fun, but not that kind of fun, if you know what I mean."

"That's what I like about Sarah," Kathy said. "She's real, and she isn't into all that crappy stuff. I just hope she stays that way."

"I think she will," Ethan said. "I mean, I haven't spent much time around her, but when I have she truly didn't seem to be interested in things like that."

There were a number of nods around the table, which made me smile. I paused to take another bite of my food, which caused Emily to sigh and reach over to grab the magazine from me. I was okay with that, because I was hungry and we only had a limited amount of time before classes started again.

"Next question," Emily said. "What do you do when you sit down to write a song, but nothing comes out?" She then turned toward me for an answer, before realizing that the answer was actually in the magazine. "Oh," she started before reading. "I stand up. You can't force the songs. They will come when the time is right and not a minute before. If the song isn't there, then sitting and waiting for it to come never works. You just have to come back to it later."

"I can't imagine writing songs," Jane said. "That's something I don't think I'd ever be able to do."

"I don't know about that," I replied. "Sarah always says that all you need to do is try. Just start writing what you feel, and it comes naturally."

"Yeah, for her!" Jane retorted. I smirked. Perhaps it was easier for some people, but I still thought all Jane needed to do was try.

Emily passed the magazine across the table to Ashley, setting the precedent for how this was going to work. If everyone took a turn all of us would be able to eat while our food was still warm.

"It says," Ashley started in her quiet voice. She always was a little shy and soft-spoken. "Now we want to get to know Sarah the person better. What is your favorite color?" Then she turned to us. "Any guesses?"

"Yellow!" Emily and Ethan blurted out almost immediately, which caused me to laugh. Kathy, Jane, and Ashley just stared at us. I guess that probably was a bit out of character, but my friends knew me too well.

"Yellow," Ashley confirmed, reading from the magazine. "With pink as a close second. Kind of like you, Megan."

I tensed up immediately. Any comparisons between Sarah and me were bad, since they could lead to the secret getting out. But none of the three girls seemed to notice Ashley's observation. Instead, they all focused on Jane as she took the magazine to read the next question. I slowly let out the breath that I was holding, and caught Emily's eye. She looked as petrified as I felt, but it looked like we were going to be okay.

"What is your favorite thing to do on a Saturday night?" Jane read. "Can anyone guess?" she asked turning toward the rest of us.

"Performing a concert," I stated. I knew it wasn't the answer that was in the magazine, but it reminded me of the preparations that were likely already underway at the Red Rocks Amphitheatre for the show I would be performing on Saturday. That thought was certainly exciting me right now.

"No," Jane laughed lightly. "But that's a good guess. She said that her favorite thing to do is hang out with friends. She said that it didn't matter what they did, as long as they were together."

"Awww," Emily fawned again. I fawned with her, at least until Ethan elbowed me in the ribs to remind me that he was there. I jumped and yelped at the unexpected contact, which caused everyone to burst out laughing.

"You know, if her friends are as close as the three of you, then I bet they have a lot of fun together," Jane said. The three of us nodded, and I knew that Jane felt left out somewhat. There wasn't really anything that I could do about that, though. I wasn't as close to the three of them as I was to Emily and Ethan.

Jane passed the magazine to Kathy, who continued reading. "Do you have any body insecurities?" she asked.

"Well, that's a stupid question," Emily said. "What teenage girl doesn’t?" She rolled her eyes, making me wonder what she was thinking. She knew me better than any other person on the planet, and she seemed to have something in mind. I figured that it probably had something to do with the changes I'd undergone over the summer, but I knew that wasn't mentioned in the magazine.

Kathy chuckled at Emily. "Okay, so what do you think her's is?"

Emily paused for a moment, trying to figure out how to put her thoughts into words. "Well," she started. "After that whole period fiasco where she fainted on TV, I bet it has something to do with the fact that she doesn't feel completely female all the time, since she started developing so late."

I knew that I was staring at Emily in shock when she looked at me. I had never told her that before, but she had just guessed the first thing that had come to my mind when the question had been asked of Sarah. I'd spent the majority of my life mistakenly thinking that I was male. I had felt like I was drowning, and becoming Megan had felt like a breath of fresh air as I was pulled out of the water. But sometimes my life felt so unreal that I was afraid I was going to wake up and find it was all a dream.

"Hmm," Kathy said while reading the real answer. "It says here that her biggest insecurity was her voice."

"Her voice?" Jane asked loudly. "How could she be insecure about her voice?! She's got a beautiful voice!"

Kathy continued reading. "She said she was always singing while growing up, but she was always afraid to let people hear her. When she was discovered it was the first time she had ever sung in public!"

"I don't believe that," Jane snapped. "Someone like her would never hide her voice!" Then she turned to me. "Is that true?"

I was startled a bit by the vehemence in her question. I didn’t know why Jane seemed to think that I couldn't be insecure about my voice. Before I had started living as Megan full time, and because my voice had never dropped, I had always been self-conscious about what other people would think. It wasn’t an issue for me now that my body matched my voice, but I still clearly remembered how I had felt before Emily and Ethan had dragged me to the party that led to my discovery. I almost didn't even get up on stage that night because of that insecurity.

"Yes," I replied. Jane looked upset, but didn't ask for any elaboration. Instead, Kathy handed the magazine back across the table to Ethan.

"Do you ever have a day where you want to take a step back and live a normal life?" Ethan read, trying to move on quickly.

"Does she even have time for a normal life anymore?" Emily asked. Sadly, I could hear a bit of disappointment in her voice. Like her, I too wished that I could spend more time with my friends doing "normal" stuff.

"Yes," Ethan replied before reading my answer. "Sarah said, 'I try to do as much normal stuff as I can. I've spent time with my friends at the beach. I had a spa day with my Mom. I went to my extended family's house for a barbeque on the 4th of July. But finding time to do the 'normal' stuff has been hard this summer. Between recording the album, performing the concert tour, interviews, photo shoots, etc. it has been hard. But that just makes me cherish the normal things I get to do even more.'"

"It must be hard to give all of that up for fame and fortune," Jane said wryly while rolling her eyes. "I'd give that up to be a singer like her," she added. That one sentence clued me in on why she was so upset. While I strived to keep a normal life amidst the turmoil that Sarah Carerra had brought this summer, she felt that I was demeaning what it meant to be in the public spotlight.

"I don't think you would," I told her. She glowered at me over the table. Obviously she did not agree with me. "Sarah loves singing and performing for people," I tried to explain my statement. "But that doesn't mean that she doesn't want to have a normal life. I can guarantee you that you would not want to give that up just to be famous. Don't be mad at her for wanting to hold on to what she had before becoming famous. She shouldn't have to give up her old life just because she's good at singing. Nobody should."

Jane was still glowering at me, but her lips had loosened, and I could tell that she was listening to me. I continued my spiel. "And if you want to be a singer like her then you need to do something about it! Take some singing lessons if you don't think you are good enough. Find somewhere to sing if you are good. Find an outlet. I'll even set you up with my dad and he can put you in touch with a record company if you are ready for that. Just don't be mad at Sarah for wanting to keep some semblance of a normal life!"

When I finished, Jane looked a bit mollified. The other two girls were looking at me a bit oddly because I was so defensive about the subject. Emily and Ethan were nodding their heads in agreement. I felt bad for being so direct with her, but I felt it was something Jane needed to hear.

"Sorry," I said a moment later.

"No," Jane replied. "I'm sorry. I guess you know better than I do what is involved. It just seems like half the time Sarah doesn't seem thankful for what she has! I'd kill to have a voice like hers!"

"I can guarantee you that she is very thankful for what she has," I told her.

"Sarah is the most humble person I know," Emily added before I could continue. "I've seen how much she enjoys performing. I know that she would never be able to give that up. But I've also seen how much it hurts her to be away from her friends and from her normal life. I understand why she regrets losing some of that. I would hate to lose that too."

Emily looked over at me. I was speechless at her words! She was right though. I couldn't imagine giving up performing in front of crowds now. I might have started the summer scared to get up on a stage, but now it was scary to think about the possibility that I wouldn't get a chance to do it again. And I did regret not being able to spend more time with Emily and Ethan this summer.

"Whatever," Jane replied, but she seemed to be considering what we had told her. At least she didn't look as upset as she had moments before.

Ethan handed me the magazine, and I glanced at the next question. Then I started laughing. This question had totally taken me by surprise when they had asked it.

"Are you a Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, or Tinkerbell fan?" I read. "Any of those?" I chuckled again before looking around our circle. "What do you guys think?"

For once both Emily and Ethan didn't have an answer. The other girls didn't appear to want to guess either.

"Tinkerbell?" Ashley said, though her uncertainty made it sound more like a question.

I turned back to the magazine. "I like the Star Wars and Lord of the Rings movies, but I've never read the books," I read. "If I had to call myself a fan of one of them, I guess it would be Tinkerbell."

I was interrupted by the ringing of a bell, which surprised me. I couldn't believe that we had been sitting there long enough for lunch to be over. There was still so much more that I wanted to read from the article about me. Immediately my friends started to gather their trays and their bags, and I reluctantly passed the magazine back to Jane. She looked like she was in a better mood, if her grin was any indication.

* * *

The rest of the school day went by slowly. I was too excited to get home and read the rest of the article to truly concentrate on my classes. There was only one class that was able to pull my attention away from thinking about the magazine interview: Chorus.

Mr. Benson started the class with three solos. He was asking for volunteers to go first, and Ethan volunteered. It had been a while since I'd heard him sing, and I had forgotten how good he was. Truthfully he wasn't likely to get a recording contract, but he certainly was better than most of the others in the class. Mr. Benson was smiling when Ethan sat back down next to me.

Mr. Benson then asked for another volunteer. Mark spoke up immediately. I hadn't expected him to volunteer, since he was only in this class to fill some kind of requirement. But he surprised us with a very good rendition of one of Josh Holliday's songs. He was nowhere near as good as Josh was, but he actually had a good voice and knew how to use it.

He sat down again and Mr. Benson once again called for a volunteer to fill the last spot for the day. Ethan nudged me with his elbow, but there was no way I was getting up there. I was still hoping to find a way out of singing alone in front of everyone to help limit the possibility that they would recognize my voice. I shook my head when Ethan looked over at me, and did my best to remain inconspicuous.

"I nominate Megan," Mark said out of the blue. When I looked over at him in surprise, he had a toothy grin on his face that let me know he was trying to embarrass me in some way. Mr. Benson looked over at me, but my almost imperceptible shake of my head was enough to let him know I wasn't ready.

"Volunteers only, Mr. Corbin," our teacher reiterated. "But remember that this is part of your grade. Each of you will need to perform a solo for the class sometime within the next couple of weeks. If you aren't ready today that is fine, but please take the time you need to prepare yourselves if you want to pass this class."

I sighed. It seemed unlikely that I was going to be able to get out of singing for them. I would have to find something to sing that sounded nothing like Sarah. It was the only chance I had to keep the secret from being exposed if anyone recognized my voice while I sang. Once again, I was unhappy that I had agreed to join Chorus.

I looked back over at Mark. He gave me another look that let me know that he wasn't finished with me. As if Chorus wasn't bad enough, I really didn't want to contend with him at the same time.

I felt much better when Anne, one of the two sopranos who were in the class, got up to sing a solo for us. I had managed to escape the inevitable, at least for one more day.

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