“Good. I don't think anyone else is awake yet.”
“Wrong.” Sage whispered near them, but loud enough for them to hear. “'Romy's been bugging me for a little bit now.”
The little girl loudly scampered over to her cousin and Tracy, then without asking, she lifted one corner of the sleeping bag and slid in and hugged Tracy. “Pway?” She said, and not in a whisper.
This caused a groan from Brooke. This was followed by a growl aimed at the little girl. “Midget, you woke me up.”
“I not mi'git.” The little girl replied.
Sage and Stacey snickered. Rachel rolled over and looked at them. “Face it, the runt's awake, no more sleeping today.”
“Not a wunt.” She stayed curled up next to Tracy.
“But Rachel, it's not even seven.” Brooke groaned. “The only lucky one here is Casey. She doesn't get to hear the kid.”
A big Thank you to Djkauf for the editing again.
More on the life of Tracy. A nice easy day this time.
NOTE: Rating slightly higher due to nudity in story
December 21st 1982
Livermore CA
Tracy woke the next morning, still in Stacey's arms. It was still dark outside the house, so Tracy didn't want to make too much noise and wake everyone up yet. It had been another night free of dreams, at least the bad ones. She was beginning to worry about going home and not having anyone who'd hold her through the night. Stacey's eyes opened up as she felt Tracy moving around.
“Hey.” She whispered. “Sleep better last night?”
“Yeah.” Tracy nodded.
“Good. I don't think anyone else is awake yet.”
“Wrong.” Sage whispered near them, but loud enough for them to hear. “'Romy's been bugging me for a little bit now.”
The little girl loudly scampered over to her cousin and Tracy, then without asking, she lifted one corner of the sleeping bag and slid in and hugged Tracy. “Pway?” She said, and not in a whisper.
This caused a groan from Brooke. This was followed by a growl aimed at the little girl. “Midget, you woke me up.”
“I not mi'git.” The little girl replied.
Sage and Stacey snickered. Rachel rolled over and looked at them. “Face it, the runt's awake, no more sleeping today.”
“Not a wunt.” She stayed curled up next to Tracy.
“But Rachel, it's not even seven.” Brooke groaned. “The only lucky one here is Casey. She doesn't get to hear the kid.”
“Oh, really?” Stacey picked up a cushion from the couch and flung it at her sister, then lay back down and tried to act like she was sleeping.
The pillow struck Casey's side and she, bounced in place, then jerked up and looked around the room with wide eyes. The other girls all pointed to her sister who looked like she was sleeping. Sage got her attention and began signing to her. Casey nodded. She slid out of her sleeping bag wearing just a nightshirt that went to her knees. She crossed the room and preceded to sit down next to her sister. Then her hands went under the sleeping bag and she began to tickle her.
As Stacey began to squirm under the attack, Casey flipped the sleeping bag off her sister, then sat on her waist and kept up the barrage of tickling.
“Okay...okay.” Stacey squealed, even though her attacker couldn't hear it. Sage tapped her shoulder and quickly signed something, causing Casey to stop and get off her sister.
“Well, if you girls are awake now.” Persephone said as she leaned into the living room from the kitchen. “I'll get breakfast started.”
“Thanks, Mom.” Sage said with a smile.
“But you may want to keep it down. Let your dad get a little more sleep.” Persephone was about to go back to the kitchen when she stopped. “Oh...Sage? Happy birthday.”
This caused the other girls to copy the statement and Sage smiled. “Thanks.”
Tracy sat up and looked at Sage. “I thought that was last night?”
“Nope, it's today, but because my Uncle will be in town from Vermont, we're all going to my Grandparent’s house for my birthday. Last night was just for me and my friends.” Sage replied.
“Oh.” Tracy started to stand up.
Sage got up and went to her, dropping her voice to a whisper. “I figured you wouldn't want to meet more people. Plus they live in the hills, south of Monterey. , I don't know if your parents would allow that. So Brooke offered to show you her place, plus tomorrow night we're sleeping over there.”
“That's cool. Are Brooke's parents cool?” Tracy asked.
“You tell me? It's just her mom.” Sage stated. "There is no dad."
“Oh yeah. I forgot.” Tracy chuckled.
“You'll love her grandparents.” Sage said.
“Oh are they visiting?”
“No. They live with Brooke and her mother so they can help out.” Sage led the way to the hall where the bathroom was. “Her Grandpa is like one of those dudes from the kung fu movies. Old and wise just without the long beard.”
“Really?” Tracy smile brightened.
“Oh yeah. He's like super cool. He does that needle thing, the acupuncture? And he does massage. He's a hell of a cook, so's his wife. Plus, he teaches some forms of kung fu at his dojo thing. His wife teaches that Tai Chi that you do.”
“Awesome." Tracy smiled at the though of possibly learning more forms of fighting. She nodded slowly, also thinking of the different foods she could try. "I may get some new recipe ideas for home.”
“That's good. Now hurry before the crowds get mean.” Sage said, pushing her into the bathroom.
Tracy sat at the kitchen table, enjoying a cup of hot chocolate, while waiting for everyone to finish their showers and changing. She wasn't alone at the table, she was just on a mental auto pilot. Her mind went over the fun of the past few days. She began thinking about the future, about having to go back to school. She was so lost in thought that she didn't see or hear Persephone come in and sit down.
She jumped when a hand touched her free hand. “You okay in there?” Sage's mother asked.
“Don't do that.” Tracy tried to look angry, but failed. Persephone just smiled.
“Sorry. I just wanted to know if you want to talk a walk with me? I need to check the mail box at the office.” The older lady stood up and offered a hand to Tracy.
“Sure.” Tracy stood up. “Let me get my coat.” Tracy slowly headed to the living room and grabbed her coat. Sage watched her and smiled.
Persephone waited at the door as Tracy came walking up. The young girl looked over her shoulder to her new friends, then back at Sage's mother with a quizzical look. “I already told them I'd like to speak to you for a minute. I promise it's nothing bad.”
“Oh. Okay.” Tracy said, still a bit worried. She followed Persephone out the door and took her time going down the steps.
“I hear the dreams are still bugging you.” Persephone said as they headed down the road of the trailer park.
“Yeah. But not last night, or the other night here.” Tracy replied. “But then Sage and Stacey held me.”
“But you won't get that at home, will you?”
Tracy chuckled, and tried to ignore the pain in her ribs. “Only if I can convince Vance to hold me and that would be a bit creepy.”
“I see the problem.” Persephone chuckled with her. “How have you been feeling?”
“Sore still, but I'm getting better.” Tracy replied.
“Good, but not what I meant.” She lowered her voice and whispered into Tracy's ear. “I meant how are you feeling with being one of the girls?” Persephone and Tracy came to a stop.
“I love it.”She said back in a hushed tone. Her smile spoke volumes of the joy she felt. “I'm just.....”
Persephone noticed Tracy's happy attitude seemed to fall. “Just what Sweetie?”
“I don't want it to end.” Tracy stated. “I get to go home and it's Troy who is going to be at my Grandparent's place on Christmas day, just because of relations. Then when school starts again, Troy gets to go, not me.”
“I can only imagine.” Persephone said. “You've tasted the life you want, only to be forced into the one you hate.”
“Yeah.” She looked at the older woman. “So what do I do?”
“I don't know.” The only women replied. “How about that doctor you spoke to the other day? The Psychiatrist?”
“Ugh.” Tracy groaned and shook her head. If any of her happy mood had been left, it was gone now. “I hate that woman.”
Persephone didn't tell her that she had already spoken to Maggie. She wanted Tracy's own take on things. “That bad?”
“She kept calling me Troy.” Tracy sighed. “Then she kept asking why I was in the skirt, even though I told her about the stitches and how much it hurts down there.”
Persephone dropped to one knee and looked Tracy in the eyes. “Was that the only reason you had the skirt on?”
“Well no. I wanted to go as Tracy. I even told her I felt better as Tracy and she kept calling me Troy.”
“Sometimes even the professionals can't get it right.” Persephone stated.
They stated walking again and Tracy was glad that it was still early and cool enough that most people were still in their houses. “What's going to happen this summer?” Tracy asked. “I get to be me all summer, then I'm stuck back as Troy when school starts.”
“I don't know.” Persephone put a hand on Tracy's shoulder. “Are you sure this is what you want?”
“More than anything.” Tracy stated.
Persephone smiled. “At least you’re sure.” Her mind was already working through plans and ideas, but she wanted to pass them by the parents, that way Tracy wouldn't get her hopes up too high. “Come on, let's get the mail and get back before they come looking for us.”
It was just past ten in the morning when Karen, Brooke's mother showed up to collect her daughter and Tracy. Rachel had gone her own way due to family plans and Stacey and Casey were going with their cousin, so it left Tracy in Brooke's care for the day.
They headed to the highway and Brooke leaned forward “Mom? Where are we going?”
“I've got some shopping to do before we go home. And I figured you girls would like to catch lunch out.” Karen replied.
“Really? Where at?” Brooke asked.
“Big Boy.” Karen said as she headed towards Dublin.
“Awesome.” Brooke smiled.
“Anywhere you two want to go to?” Karen glanced in the mirror at the girls, then back at the road.
“Not really.” Tracy replied.
“Music store?” Brooke gave her mother a huge grin.
“We'll see how busy the mall is before we go inside, okay?” Karen said as they got off the highway.
[Back in the Town of Oroville]
Maggie sat at her desk, once again enjoying the quiet of the office while she ate her lunch. Once again she had both pictures of her family on her desk. She didn't know why she kept comparing them. She had seen it in Tracy's face already.
She was halfway through her sandwich when the phone rang. She chewed quickly as she picked up the handset, swallowed and spoke. “Wright Cleaning, This is Maggie, how may I help you?”
“Maggie, this is Persephone.” The voice on the other end said. Maggie's mother mode kicked in fast and she dropped the rest of her sandwich back onto the Ziploc bag.
“What's wrong? Is Tracy okay? Do I need to come get her?” Maggie reached for a pen and paper, in case she needed an address.
“Slow down Maggie. There's nothing wrong. I just wanted to talk to you.” Persephone chuckled slightly. She knew she would have reacted the same way.
“She's not being a pest, is she?”
“Not at all. In fact Lilian and Lynn have all said she's been on her best behavior. She's due at Karen's tonight. There's been no complaints from us, or we would have called Shelly by now.” Persephone stated.
“Oh that's good.” Maggie relaxed. “So...um...why the call then?”
“I wanted to talk to you about your daughter. I know you're at work and I don't want to get you in trouble, so I was wondering if I could have a few moments with you at my place, before you go to pick her up on Thursday? She's opened up to me a little and I wanted to pass on the information to you.”
“Sure, I guess. We'll be in town tomorrow evening and staying with Shelly. Modine is coming with us and she doesn't feel like a six hour trip.” Maggie said.
“I can understand. Well then maybe I'll go see you when all the girls are at Karen's tomorrow evening.” Persephone stated.
“You sure it's nothing bad? Because if it's bad you can call when I get home tonight.” Maggie said.
“I would, but we've got a family thing going on tonight, that's why I called now.” Persephone replied.
“Oh....where's Tracy at?”
“She's with Brooke's family. You got the address the other day. Lilian and I are taking our girls to the family thing and that left Rachel and Brooke. Rachel also had something going on, so Brooke offered a night at her place. It was either that or Shelly's and we thought Tracy would like another night with the girls...well one of them at least.”
“Well I just wouldn't want to have her wear out her welcome too quickly.” Maggie said.
“She isn't. Trust me, the girls are taking to her like ducks to water.” Maggie could hear background chatter and Persephone was quiet for a moment. The phone became muffled, then she heard the other woman again. “Maggie? I need to get going. I'll see you at Shelly's tomorrow?”
“Sure.” Maggie replied. “Thank you for the call, Persephone.”
Even though she wasn't exactly sure where she was at first, that changed when they had passed the trailer park that Sage lived in. Tracy had been slightly surprised to find that Brooke only lived about a quarter of a mile from Rachel and her house bordered the Trailer park Sage lived in. They pulled into the drive of a two story home on a cul-de-sac. It seemed to be a quiet road, even though it was just a stone’s throw to the highway. To their side looked a large two story home, with a small structure on the top and a barn in the back and a for sale sign on the lawn.
Tracy watched as Brooke raced her way up the ramp attached to the porch. Karen pushed Tracy up the ramp as an older gentleman of Asian descent came out and smiled at them. “Grandfather!” Brooke said in an excited voice. She leaned forward and the old man gave her a hug.
He began to speak in Chinese. Brooke giggled and responded, speaking as quickly as the old man did. After a moment or two, he looked towards Tracy. “You must be Tracy.” His voice was thick with accent as he talked. His smile never wavered. He gave her a slight bow and held it, till she mirrored him, as best as she could in the chair.
“Yes sir, I am.” She replied.
“And with good manners, too. You must make your parents very proud.” He kept smiling at her.
“I try my best, sir.” She nodded.
“I am Lok, but you may call me Mr. Han. I am Karen's father and Brooke's grandfather."
“Come on, Father.” Karen said. “Let's get them inside and I'll grab their bags.”
“I've got her.” He said as he moved to grab Tracy's wheelchair. He began pushing her inside and watching his granddaughter race into the house. “So tell me, are there any foods you won't eat? You do eat rice, right? We eat a lot of Noodle and rice dishes here.”
“I love rice.” She looked over her shoulder and smiled. “Mom used to make a noodle dish for the longest time, but then she got busy with work and she can't cook as much, so I am taking over the cooking in the house. When I asked her for it, she can't find the recipe anywhere, which sucks because she got it from a Chinese restaurant near our place.”
“Well maybe I could help you remember the recipe and you can cook it at home.”
“That would be great!” Tracy beamed from her seat.
“My Granddaughter tells me you also study Tai Chi?” He asked.
“Yes, sir, since I was about seven or eight.” She replied.
“Very good. And Brooke told me you got hurt while fighting at the start of the month?” He pushed her wheelchair into the kitchen. He pulled out three cups from the cupboard and looked at her. “You drink tea?”
“Yes, sir.” Tracy nodded. She leaned back in her chair, unaware that Brooke was next to her. “It wasn't really a fight.” She started, then she corrected herself. “Well it was, but I didn't want it.”
“Tell me about it.” He said as he started to heat up a tea kettle on the stove.
“Well it's kind of a long story. It started before the fight in December.” Tracy stated.
“Then start there. All stories should start at the beginning.” He spoke, using a very grandfatherly tone.
So Tracy began to tell him the story about Bruce and finding him stealing from the classrooms around Thanksgiving. She covered, if only briefly, her visit to Livermore and meeting Rachel and Sage. She went on to talk about the attack, skipping the part of the attempted rape.
When she finished Brooke rolled up and put a hand on her arm, causing Tracy to jump in her seat. “Tracy, tell him all of the story.”
She looked at Brooke. “Wh...why?”
“He can help with the nightmares.” Brooke replied. “I used to have them all the time after the accident.”
“My Granddaughter has told me of night terrors that are bothering you, but she didn't say what caused them.” He said as he kept working on the tea.
Tracy sighed and began to tell him the parts she had skipped. She decided it was pointless to fight it. He knew they were happening and if he had a way to help, she'd take it. She decided to explain the dreams as well. In the telling of the tale, he could see the guilt she felt about the attack. She stopped when she noticed that the old man had pushed a cup in front of her.
“You feel guilty for fighting back, don't you?” The old man asked.
“Yes, a little.” Tracy lowered her gaze to the cup of steaming tea.
“Don't. It's true that fighting should be the last resort, but even a hare bites when it's cornered.”
Tracy looked up and stared at him with a quizzical expression for a moment. “What?”
"Even a hare bites when it is cornered.” Brooke's grandfather repeated. “It means that even the most gentle of creatures will defend themselves when they have to.”
Tracy thought about it for a moment, then she took a drink. As she put the cup down, she looked up. “Soooo.” She held onto the vowel sound for a moment as her mind worked over what he was saying. “What you're saying is it was okay to fight then?”
“In that situation, yes. You tried to talk them out of a fight, correct?” Lok asked.
“Yes sir. I tried, but Bruce....he wanted....” Tracy bit her lip and looked away.
“Some people won't listen to reason. Had he listened to you, I doubt you'd be in that chair and he wouldn't be in jail....well not because of his attack on you. But he didn't. That's something you can't help. You have no power over the decisions of others. You did what anyone would have done. You defended yourself and tried to run, but they followed.”
Tracy nodded and her gaze went back to the cup. She took another drink and Lok continued. “Have you spoken to your teacher yet?”
“The Principal of my school knows. I don't know if the teachers know everything yet.” Tracy replied.
“Not that teacher. Your Tai Chi Master.” Lok picked up his own cup with one hand.
“Not yet. I've been doing a lot of lying around and healing after getting tripped.” Tracy stated.
“Then when you get home, you should set a meeting to talk to him. Tell him everything you told me and see if he agrees. But don't take the blame for this. You have no reason to feel shame.” He stated.
“Really?” Tracy asked.
Instead of answering right away, Lok leaned over the table and flicked Tracy's cheek. She sat up, startled and stared at him. He cocked his head slightly to one side and asked. “Did you have any control over me doing that?”
“No.” Tracy shook her head.
“Should you feel guilty for it?” He asked.
Tracy thought about it for a moment and shook her head again. “No, I guess not.”
“Then why should you take blame for the boy who attacked you?”
Tracy thought about it for a moment. She knew stealing was wrong. Despite what people would think about her for tattling, she was glad she told the Principal. But it was the skirt that seemed to drive Bruce crazy. “Because I had on a skirt?”
“Girls wear them.” He replied with a gesture of his hand. “Should he be allowed to attack any women who wears one?”
Tracy thought about it for a moment. “No, I guess not. But...” She paused and looked to Brooke, then at the old man. “I wasn't born a girl.” She knew the parents all knew about her male parts, but she didn't know if Brooke's grandparents knew.
“And.....?” The old man waited for a better answer. When none came, he leaned forward and smiled. “It doesn't matter what you were wearing. He was going to attack you either way. Why else would he have shown up with three friends. You yourself said that one left when he saw what the boy planned, after they saw the skirt. So no matter what, he was planning to hurt you. You have the right to defend yourself. It wouldn’t have mattered if you had on shorts, a skirt, a dress, or nothing. He was going to attack you.”
Tracy stayed quiet as she worked it over in her mind. He had said he was going to kick her ass anyway. She could recall the look on his face when he had said it. Lok could see the comprehension cross her face and he smiled, then put a hand on one of hers. “You understand now.”
“Yeah.” She nodded and her lips pulled into a small smile. “So I shouldn't feel guilty? But then why won’t the dreams go away.”
“That's a bit different. Your dreams may not be about guilt. You were attacked.” He said as he took the tea pot and re-filled his cup. “It is like soldiers who go to war. They have dreams about what happened.”
“Can you stop them?” Tracy asked.
“That I can't do. But we can try and help you deal with them. Or find ways to control them.” He replied. “But for now, enjoy the tea and relax. Have some fun and we can talk after dinner.”
“Okay. Thank you sir.” Tracy said with a smile.
It was after dinner and Tracy, Brooke, Lok and his wife, Jiao sat at the table with recipe cards all over the table. Tracy sat there with a notebook, while Brooke read off the ingredients and directions that were in Chinese. Tracy had three piles going, one was the stuff she wanted and another other was stuff she really wanted. The third was things that she was sure would never make it at their place. So far six recipes had made it into the really want pile. She wanted to stop at just one more, the rest she could get in the summer.
They had already started with the beef chow fun that they had for dinner. Tracy looked up from the most recent of recipes that had been told to her and she leaned back in her seat. “Thank you again for this.” She said to Lok and his wife.
“We don't mind. Hopefully you can find a place near your hometown that can sell some of the harder to find ingredients, but I have hope.” Lok said as he got up to fix some tea. “One more thing. I will give a list to your mother. It is teas and herbs that will help curb the nightmares, but remember, you have to be a part of this too. You got to be strong of mind for them to work, okay?”
“Yes sir.” She nodded at him.
“And when you are able to exercise again, do so before bed. Tire yourself out. That will help the tea work.”
“I will.” She replied with a nod.
“Hey, this one has promise.” Brooke held up a card for Tracy to see.
“I can't read that. What does it say?”
“It's Fried pork with spring onions.” Brooke said, as she looked over the ingredients. “I love this one. You get to soak the pork in rice wine, then fry it up.”
“Wine? I don't think my parents will let me have that. I don't think they'll let us drink yet.” Tracy stated.
“You don't drink it. You cook with it.” Brooke replied.
“Tracy.” Lok called from the stove. “The alcohol burns off. You just have the flavor. I can explain it to your mother if you think she'd be against it, but she may know about cooking with it already.”
“Well, if it burns off, then we should be fine.” Tracy stated. “What's the ingredients?” She asked as she picked up her pencil.
As Brooke read off the ingredients, Tracy took the notes as quickly as she could. Lok brought the tea pot over to the table and filled up four cups. She waited for Brooke to finish, then she put down her pencil and picked up the cup and took a drink. “Thank you, sir.”
“You're welcome.” He replied as he took his seat again. “Come on, let’s find one more recipe for you. I have a good one for you.” He began shuffling through the stack. “Ah, yes. Braised Beef, Shan-see style.” He said, his accent becoming a bit thicker.
“Shan-see?” Tracy looked up from her cup. “What's that?”
“A province in Northern China.” Lok replied. “It is spelled differently, but that's how it's pronounced.” He handed the card to his granddaughter and let the girls get busy with the translation.
Tracy was walking into Brooke's bedroom after a quick change into a sleep shirt that went to just above her knees. A second or two later, Brooke rolled into the room. Her's was the only room on the first floor of the house. The room was a bit larger then Rachel's or Sage's. It had been the den, until her accident. Now it had a double bed on one wall, a desk with no chair, plus a TV in one corner. The walls were a forest green. Tracy's wheelchair was in there already.
Brooke went past her, patting her hip as she passed. “You know you don't have to hide in the bathroom to change. I'm not going to judge or comment.”
“I....” Tracy sat in her wheelchair, just to keep out of the way. She watched her feet for a moment, wishing she hadn't been born the way she was. “I just don't want people seeing my body like this.”
“None of us will care.” Brooke replied, stopping by her dresser. “But I can understand. Sage is the same way.”
Tracy looked up as Brooke pulled off her shirt, showing a white bra underneath. She removed that too and tossed both garments into a nearby hamper. Tracy's eyes stayed on her friends chest for a moment. As Brooke started to lift up one side of her hips to remove her jeans. Tracy's cheeks went red, but she couldn't look away. She wasn't sure why. Then from below her waist, she felt a slight stirring, as something began to grow. She only turned her head when Brooke looked over at her.
“Oh....Sorry Tracy.” Brooke said with a chuckle. “I'm just used to being around Rachel, Casey and Stacey. We've changed in front of each other, a lot. I'll warn ya when I'm done.”
Tracy looked over as Brooke slid her jeans off. She got a good view of her profile. “Sorry, I'm...” She looked away again. “I've...it's stupid I guess.”
“No. You don't want that body, it's not stupid. I can understand that. And not everyone is comfortable being with naked people, or being naked themselves.” Brooke looked over as Tracy tried to sneak another peek.
“Like you?” Tracy asked as she could see Brooke's mostly bare hips through the gaps on the side of the wheelchair.
Brooke shrugged. “I didn't have much choice. After my accident, I saw so many doctors and those gowns they give you don't cover much. I learned to just put up with it. But Rachel, Stacey and Casey are different. They don't view me as a piece of meat. I'm not just an account. They are my friends who I love dearly.” She turned to face Tracy better and Tracy blushed as she realized that she was just wearing panties. Tracy's eyes did a quick once over of the mostly naked girl, pausing at key parts that she didn't have on her own body. “And honestly, you are one of my friends now.” Brooke placed her pants onto her lap.
“It's...I've never seen a naked person before, well that I remember. And at school some of the boys are all talking about how hot a girl looks and Sage and Rachel talk about the cute boys, I....” Tracy trailed off and looked to the floor, but her eyes kept drifting back up. She covered her lap with her hands. “I don't know what I like.”
Comprehension crossed Brooke's face and she nodded as the thoughts worked their way out. “So, you want to know if you like girls?”
Tracy nodded. “You're not mad, are you?”
“No, not really.” Brooke said as she tossed her jeans into the hamper and pulled out her sleep clothes from the dresser. “So, do you like girls?”
“I don't know.” Tracy answered as she looked at Brooke again. “I mean you look good, but I'm more jealous that you look that good, you know, with the boobs and stuff and I don't have it.” Tracy looked away as her cheeks turned a deeper shade of red. But there was a part of her that enjoyed seeing Brooke naked. Her eyes drifted back to her friend once more.
Brooke pulled a pair of pajama pants up her legs, taking the time to lift up in the wheelchair, then she slid on her night gown, then rolled over to Tracy. “Then we're even.” She said. “You got your legs and I don't.” She realized what she had said as she said it and guilt began to well up in her.
“Oh...I mean...I didn't....” Tracy sighed and slumped down in her chair. “I didn't mean to make it seem like there was nothing wrong with you...”
Brooke leaned over and put a hand against her cheek. “It's okay I shouldn't have said what I said, well not like how I did. I know what you're saying.” She backed up her chair and held her arms out. “Come here.” Tracy got out of her wheelchair and leaned forward, into the hug that Brooke offered.
They were quiet for a few moments, till she stood up. “Thank you for not being mad.”
“No problem. I gave up being mad over stupid shit a while ago. At least when it comes to my legs.” Brooke smiled brightly, then she fought the urge to blush as she noticed a slight bulge in Tracy's crotch and she began to suspect that her friend hadn't been completely honest with her, but she decided to not push the subject. “Besides, I bet I'm a better basketball player then you are.”
“I wouldn't doubt it.” Tracy replied.
“So, would you like to share my bed tonight?” Brooke asked, her cheeks turning a deeper shade of red as she realized what she had said. Tracy saw the change in color, but didn't say anything. “You seem to sleep better in peoples arms.”
“If you don't mind.” Tracy replied.
“Not at all, but you get the wall. It's easier for me to roll into my chair.” Brooke stated.
“Will your mom and Grandparents mind? I mean I'm not fully a girl yet.” Tracy said.
Brooke nodded. “I told them when you were changing. Stacey and Sage's mothers have told them about the dreams. So Mom expected it. Grandmother was a bit leery, but mom told her that you couldn't do anything if you wanted. But we got to keep our clothes on.”
Tracy snickered. “Not a problem.”
“Awww. I'm not cute enough for you?” Brooke teased. Tracy's mouth opened up and she was about to speak when Brooke put a finger over her lips. “Kidding. It was a joke.”
“Oh.” Tracy gave a quiet sigh of relief.
The two girls went over to the bed, pulled back the blankets and sheets. Then Tracy climbed in. watched as Brooke got out of her chair on her own and shifted her body, using her arms to the bed. When she moved to help, Brooke glared for a second and shook her head. “I got this.”
“Okay.” Tracy said. She watched in amazement as Brooke moved fully on the bed without a problem. Then she looked up. “Brooke? Want me to get the light?”
“Crud.” Brooke said. “Please?”
Tracy crawled over the bed and reached to the light switch near the end of the bed. When the light was out she was surprised to find there was a nightlight near the bed. Brooke saw her looking at it. She waited till Tracy laid back down.
“Sorry about the nightlight, I use it so I can find the wheelchair in the middle of the night if I need the bathroom.”
“Oh. That's cool. Beats reaching around in the dark.” Tracy smiled at her. “I swear Vance likes to get up and move stuff around when I'm sleeping.”
“Sounds like something a brother would do.” Brooke replied in a sad tone.
Brooke laid on her side, reached down to physically move a leg, then she touched Tracy's side. Tracy moved in closer and held the other girl. “Thank you for this.”
“No problem. I'd rather hold you then have my mom and grandparents come bursting into the room if you had a dream.” Brooke stated.
Tracy lat there for a moment, looking over Brooke as the other girl stared back at her. “Can I ask a question?” Tracy said after a few moments.
“What is it?” Brooke asked.
“Do you like girls?” Tracy asked. “I don't care, I was just wondering 'cause we were talking 'bout it earlier.”
Brooke smiled again. “I think so.” She stated. “I mean I have guys I have feelings for too, so I think I like both.”
“I wish I knew what I was feeling.” Tracy replied.
“Give it time. I'm almost twelve. I've had time to figure things out while I got better.” Brooke said. “Besides, you got more going on than who you like.”
“I guess you're right.” Tracy stated.
“It's my gift.” Brooke giggled.
December 22nd 1982
Livermore CA
Tracy woke up before the sun and had to answer the call of nature. She was thankful that the house wasn't full of people so she wouldn't have to wait. As she sat up, she noticed that Brooke wasn't in bed with her and her wheelchair was already out of the room. She quietly made her way to the bathroom and stepped in. A few minutes later, as she stepped out of the bathroom, Brooke came rolling up to her, still in just a nightgown and pajama pants.
The girl in the chair smiled at her. “Hey, I wanna show you something.”
“Okay....” Tracy looked at her, wondering what it could be. She followed Brooke through the house and into the kitchen. Once there they went to the sliding glass door and she gestured for Tracy to come closer.
Brooke carefully opened up the door and rolled out onto the porch. Tracy followed, stopping long enough to shut the sliding door. They went to the end of the porch and Tracy could see Brooke's grandmother, Jiao, in the middle of the yard, going through the paces of Tai Chi. She wore the type of uniform that Tracy wore to her own classes, the loose pants and the shirt that buttoned down in the front, like the ones Bruce Lee seemed to wear in every movie, but Jiao's was silk. The thing that really caught her attention, was the fan that was in the old woman's hand. Tracy knew people could use weapons in Tai Chi, but she had never seen a fan being used.
She became mesmerized by the movements. The gentle swaying of the hands, then a fast popping of the wrist, causing the fan to snap out. Brooke was watching, and trying to mimic the movements of her grandmother, but without the leg movements, it seemed out of place. They stood there in silence watching the older lady do her workout.
Tracy watched, wishing she could have joined in. Once more she swore internally at Bruce. She could have been having a lot of fun the past few days, but she had felt like she was dragging everyone down. Sure, She knew Brooke was in a chair too, but she had control over it. With her wrist just finally getting better, she could barely move it on her own.
“I wish I could do that stuff.” Brooke whispered loud enough for Tracy to hear. “I mean I can move my arms, but it's not the same.”
Tracy looked at her for a moment. She felt guilty for what had happened, even though it wasn't her fault. “I'm sorry.”
“It's okay.” Brooke replied. “I try to act like it doesn't bother me, but it does.”
“You didn't have to bring me out here.” Tracy said.
“I don't mind. You said you’re into that and I doubt you'd ever seen someone use a fan before.”
“Thank you. It is...” she watched for a moment and she smiled. “It's really cool. My teacher wont let me work with weapons yet.”
“Give it time.” Brooke said.
“Yeah. I just hate waiting” Tracy sighed.
“Me too.” Brooke nodded.
Ok, so I lied. One more day of Livermore, then off to Palermo CA.
Comments
Through the years: Tracy emerging part 15
Gotta love Chinese Wisdom.
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
Tai Chi
So graceful, so beautiful!
I always like the line from Venus Envy
It's from Zoe's dad.
"Ah, Tai Chi. The ballet Martial art."