Andrew’s Dilemma

Part 14

By, Cain129

Special Thanks to Wren Phoenix for the editing.

Synopsis:   Andrew has finally become the person that he had always wanted to be and is settling into her new life. Unfortunately, that life is about to become very complicated. Her father now knows where she is living and will stop at nothing to make sure that Andrew never makes it to court. He has powerful allies that could allow him to succeed, except for one variable. Andrew no longer exists, and Jessica is not about to let Jake take away everything that she has worked so hard to gain.

Chapter 31

I found it hard sitting around with really nothing to do. Since the catheter and IV were removed, I was pretty much free to move about, but I wasn’t allowed to leave the ward alone. I spent most of my time in my room or in the recreation room watching TV. They did have a few movies, but most of them were for kids younger than me, and what they did have for my age really wasn’t worth watching.

When Amy dropped in after my lunch, the two of us decided to take a walk while she ate her meal. Amy insisted that if we were going to leave the ward, I would have to use a wheel chair. I knew that I was capable of walking on my own, but she would hear none of it.   In the end I agreed and I climbed into the chair.

“How was your morning, Jessica?”

“It was all right, just kind of boring, I guess, so I am very glad you dropped in. There is some good news; Dr. Masters says that I should be able to go home in the next couple of days!”

“That is good news.” Amy agreed. “You’re becoming a regular here!”

“Yeah, I’ve spent way too much time in the hospital lately. I just want to get out of here and start living my life.”

“I guess that I can’t blame you there,” Amy said with a smile. “Do you feel like taking a trip outside the building, Jessica?”

“Sure, Amy. I’d love to get some fresh air.”

It only took us about 10 minutes before we reached the main exit and the two of us were outside. It was a nice sunny day and really warm. Amy pushed the chair over to one of the benches and took a seat next to me.

I smiled. “Oh, it smells so nice Amy, thank you for this.”

“Anytime, Sis!” Amy said smiling.

I looked over at Amy. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure honey, you can ask me anything.” Amy reassured me.

“There’s this boy I like, and I think that he likes me, too. I’ve never really dated anyone, let alone a boy! It’s just that every time I see him, well, I feel all funny inside.”

“What you’re feeling is normal, honey. I may not be into boys, but I can remember having those same feelings the first time I found myself attracted to another girl. I was much too afraid to make a move back then, and I was still very much in the closet. I never even talked to her!” Amy giggled.

“I don’t know what I should do about it Amy? He’s asked me out before, but I never called him back, mostly because I wasn’t complete. It wouldn’t have been fair to him then. I’m a girl now and not just in my mind.”

“You need to be careful, honey; just because you’re a girl now, it doesn’t mean that you can’t get hurt emotionally. There are so many experiences that you’ve missed out on and dating is a big step. I think that right now, you should just try to be friends with him and see where that leads. You have all the time in the world, so there’s really no reason to rush anything. Besides, if he really likes you, he won’t try to rush you into anything. He’ll wait until you’re ready for a relationship, Jessica.”

“I guess you’re right Amy, but he’s just so damn hot!” I said with a smile.

“I’m sure he is, Jessica, but you know I’m not the greatest judge of hot guys. I tend to notice their sisters first!” Amy said, laughing, which set Jessica off, too.

“So, do you and Tara have any plans for Sunday?”

“I don’t think so, why?”

“I was just thinking that it would be nice if the two of you dropped over, maybe stay for supper?” I said, hopefully.

“When I see Tara tonight, I will ask her, if we have no plans then the two of us should be able to make it.” Amy said, smiling.

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The doctor had finally seen Sarah about an hour ago. After a conversation with Janet, though, a counselor had come to see her. She was obviously very depressed, and the counselor felt that she was possibly suicidal. He had given her a choice, to see a doctor from mental health willingly, or he was going to have her held on a 48 hour observation. To say that Sarah was unhappy with Janet was an understatement. If looks could kill, Janet’s head would have exploded off of her shoulders some time ago.

Sarah and Janet were pretty much stuck sitting in a small lounge for the next hour or so, waiting to see the doctor. There was a window that overlooked a small park. Sarah looked outside; she could see that there were some patients wandering around, and even a few staff members. As she looked around, one girl caught her attention. She was maybe 16 years old and looked very pretty. She was also a little pale; no doubt she was recovering from something.

There was another girl with her that was in her 20’s, maybe her sister. She wore a nursing uniform, but from watching the two of them she could tell that the two of them knew one another pretty well. The girl looked so happy, without a care in the world. They were far enough away that Sarah wasn’t able to get a good look at her, but this was the child that she had always wanted. It wasn’t meant to be, though. In her place, she had been giving a little boy that she loved all the same. It didn’t change the fact that she often wished that Andrew had been a baby girl.

After watching for awhile, the two girls looked like they were going inside. As the girls came closer, Sarah was able to get a better look at the two of them.   Her eyes zoomed in on the girl in the wheelchair, and she couldn’t believe what she was seeing. The girl in the wheelchair looked just like Andrew!

As she looked more carefully, she could see subtle differences. Sarah could see that this child was happy and had a look in her eyes that Andrew had never had. Her eyes were full of life, while Andrew’s had always seemed sort of lifeless. But could she possibly BE Andrew?

Sarah saw the daughter that she had always wanted, and wanted to run outside and talk to her. She knew at the moment that this wouldn’t be a good idea. She wanted to wait for the right time to talk, once they could be alone. It was at that time that Sarah Roberts was brought back to reality, when she heard a doctor calling her name.

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It was around 12:45 when we made our way back to my room. Amy only had 15 minutes left of her lunch hour by the time we made it back to my room, so she had to head back to the ward where she was working. We said our goodbyes and I climbed back into my bed.

As I lay in bed, I took out my phone and connected to the internet with it. I went to YouTube and spent the next hour just watching some funny videos, waiting for Mom to arrive. She had said she was bringing Megan and Jennifer with her.

I thought about what I was going to do now. For the first time in my life, I felt like a whole person. Things seemed different somehow, more…relaxed, I guess. Ever since   

  I’d come to understand who I really was inside, depression had been my constant companion. Because of that, I’d been filled with self hated, and that had eventually lead me to trying to end my own life.

Things were different now. I was no longer depressed and I finally felt complete, no longer living a lie. Best of all, I truly loved the person that I was now! If you really have love for yourself and others, there is no room for self-hatred.   It was at that moment that I realized, whatever the future had in store for me, I could handle it and I would be happy.

I guess there is a cost for everything though. To become the real me, I had to endure a lot of emotional pain. Knowing that I was a girl but having to live as a boy, losing my parents . . . that pain still hurt me inside. They never did get to know the real me. The person that they knew was a fabrication. Someone they unknowingly had helped to create. Jessica was the real me. She had always been there, hiding and waiting for her chance to come forth.

I knew I would be all right, though. Even though I had lost my mom and dad, I’d gained so much more. I have Janice and Anthony, and my sisters Amy, Megan and Jennifer. They all know the real me and they love me for who I am. If you ask me what else does a girl need, well, maybe a boyfriend?

It was at the moment my phone rang; when I picked it up I noticed that it was a text from Megan.

• Megan, “hey sis, schools done. What’s up?”

• Jessica,” nothing, bored”

• Megan,” waiting on mom, be there soon.”

• Jessica,” Cool”

• Megan, “need anything?”

• Jessica, “Pizza would be nice”

• Megan, “will ask mom, see ya”

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Chapter 32

Sarah spent the last hour being asked question after question, and wanted nothing more then to get away from that doctor. It was driving her crazy not being in control of things.

Dr. Robbins had no difficulty noticing that Sarah was becoming pretty irate and was also very evasive to his questioning. After talking to her for about 15 minutes, he left the room and went to the waiting room where Janet was waiting. He figured if Sarah refused to talk to him, then maybe her sister would.

“Janet Burke?” Dr. Robbins said as he entered the waiting area

Janet smiled. “Yes Doctor, I’m Janet, how’s my sister doing?”

“She has not been very cooperative.” Dr. Robbins frowned. “I was hoping you would be able to give me some background information about your sister.”

So for the next 20 minutes Janet told him about Sarah’s past and the abuse that she had suffered. She eventually led up to Sarah’s relationship with her son, Andrew. By the time she finished Dr. Robbins had a pretty good idea about the woman that he was dealing with. Sarah was a deeply disturbed woman, one that would need long term care if she was ever able to rebuild her life.

Dr. Robbins looked over at Janet. “Your sister has a lot of problems and from what you’ve told me, she’s done absolutely nothing to deal with them. Because of this, she has taken all of her childhood issues and carried them into her marriage.   I would even say that those issues have affected her relationship with her son.

Sarah truly needs to be hospitalized. At the very least, she should be admitted for a few months, that way we could get her started on the right path. I don’t think that she is going to voluntarily agree to being admitted, though.”

Janet thought for a minute. “You’re right; she is not going to let herself be admitted.   That only leaves us one choice; you will need to have her committed.   Anything that you need me to sign, I will, Doctor.” Janet said sadly. “I know she will hate me, but she will be alive, and feeling better eventually.”

All right, Janet. I will work on getting the paperwork started, and I’ll have someone call you when it’s ready. At the moment, I need to get a hold of a judge. Thank you, Janet, for your help. Don’t worry about Sarah; she is going to get the help she needs.

“Thanks, Doctor Robbins. I know we’re doing the right thing for her.”

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Rocco had parked his car a few house away from the Tanners home, and had been watching the house. He was waiting for a chance to have a look inside. When he saw Janice leaving around 3pm, he knew that the chance had come. Being careful not to draw attention to himself, he made his way around to the back of the house. After taking a quick look and finding no security system protecting the house, he quickly   opened the door and made his way inside.

The first thing he did was to take a look around the house. He found three bedrooms, and he knew that there was no use checking out the master bedroom, because the boy wouldn’t be there. The bedroom across from the master bedroom was definitely a girls room and he couldn’t really see Andrew sleeping there. There was one room downstairs that looked promising. Inside was a double bed and lots of music equipment, but after he went inside and took a look around, he found a closet full of girls clothes, and the dresser had nothing to indicate that there was a boy using the room.   This room was also definitely used by a girl, most likely a tomboy, but a girl all the same.

Rocco Left the hours as he found it and made sure that there was no trace that he had been there. Once he made it to his car, he picked up his phone and called   Vincent’s number.

“Hey Vincent, it’s Rocco. The information the informant gave us is garbage. I just left the house. Andrew’s not there and if he had been there earlier, he isn’t now.”

“I’ll look into it, Rocco. I’ll get back to you. You’d better tell Jake before he does something stupid.” With that, Vincent ended the call.

*Damn it, I was hoping I was done babysitting that asshole.* Rocco thought to himself as he put the car into drive and headed off to where Jake was hiding out.

After Rocco arrived at Jakes cabin and went inside, he found Jake had already started drinking again, and he just shook his head. A sober Jake he could handle, but when Jake drank, he was loose cannon. Rocco didn’t like drunks or drug addicts. They were a serious and unnecessary risk in his line of business, and they couldn’t be trusted.

Jake lost it when Rocco told him the information that they had received was bogus, and he started yelling at Rocco, saying he was useless. Rocco knew how to deal with out of control drunks. He’d had plenty of experience, so with one quick punch, Jake hit the ground hard and wasn’t moving. Rocco had knocked him out cold, and it felt really good.

Rocco knew that what he was going to do next would piss Jake off more then being knocked out; he poured all of his liquor down the drain.

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It was around 3:30 pm, when mom arrived with Megan and Jennifer. It was nice to see them but it was also nice seeing the large pizza that Jennifer was carrying.

Mom came over and gave me a hug and kiss. “How’s my girl?” She asked with a smile.

I smiled, hugging her back. “I’m good, Mom. I am really glad to see you guys. Dr. Masters says I will be able to come home soon.”

Mom smiled, “I know honey, he called me this morning and told me the good news.”

“I can’t wait to be home, I’m starting to really hate hospitals.” I said with a frown.

“So, what did you do all day?” asked Megan.

“Not really much. Amy dropped in at lunchtime for a visit, and we went outside for a bit. Other than that, it’s been pretty boring.”

“It must have been nice to get outside for a while, anyway.” Jennifer said.

“Yeah, it was great. I would have loved to stay out longer, but Amy had to get back to work.”

“Well, its cool that she took the time to take you out,” Jennifer said as she sat on the edge of the bed.

“Yeah, Amy is great, I’d really like to do something for her, especially after everything she has done for me.” I said, sadly.

“Why so sad?”   Asked Janice.

“I worry about Amy; she is like a sister to me, but her family wants nothing to do with her. I just wish there was more that I could do for her.”

“Honey, I think you are doing plenty for her. The two of you have a bond that most people will never understand, and it’s deeper than just friendship. It makes the two of you like family. Just treat her like she’s your family, and you’ll give her more then you can even imagine.

Anthony and I know she’s like a sister to you. Now that you’re going to become our daughter, I guess that makes her part of our family too, Jessica. We can’t be her parents, but there’s no reason she can’t be a part of our family!” Janice said, smiling as she put her arm around me.

“I like the idea of having another sister, too!’ Megan said with a smile. “It means more presents for me at Christmas!”

Jennifer laughed. “Only you would think of something like that, Megan.”

“What’s wrong with wanting more presents?” Megan asked with a sly little smile.

  “I love you guys, even my greedy sister.” I said, referring to Megan.

Soon we were all trying to talk at once, laughing and chatting. It felt really good to have my family here with me, and I knew that we would always be close.

End of part 14

To be continued in part 15