The Chinese Food Restaurant
El Guapo
Have you ever noticed that only girls work at Chinese food restaurants. Have you ever noticed that even in small towns with almost no minorities there always seems to be plenty of Chinese girls to work at the restaurant. This though and many dirty thoughts about the same girls pervaded my mind on many a trip to the local Chinese restaurant until finally I got up the nerve one day to ask that very question. And I can’t say I’m too surprised by the answer either, after all this is a BigCloset story.
“Excuse me miss, please don’t mind me asking, but how are there so many Chinese waiters working here when there are only nine hundred people in this town?”
“Well sir, please, let me show you, my name is Mi Su Yu and this my family business, follow me.”
She was about five foot even, she was wearing a red House of China shirt and a pair of khaki women’s pants that fit her modest curves. I followed her into the kitchen where she proceeded to give me the tour.
“Once I show this, you become employee, ‘kay!” she looked up at me as we walked through the door.
“Okay, sure, whatever you say!” I said laughing at her joke as we toured the kitchen.
“This my brother, he cook” the waitress said, “His name is Mi Kuuk Cat, he top chef and boss!” she said as she introduced me to a smallish Asian man about five foot five or so with cropped black hair and a skinny build.
“Hello.” Mi Kuuk Cat said curtly, “Welcome to House of China!”
“Thank you,” I said politely, “It is neat to see how this place works, but you didn’t answer how you get so many Chinese waiters.” I said, curious to see if they would answer my question or not.
“I answer that question, come with me.” Mi Kuuk Cat said as he pointed to a room in the back. “Please step inside the room so I show you waitresses, okay?”
“Sure,” I said as I stepped inside, I’d go anywhere to see some of their waitresses I thought as the door slammed shut behind me.
“Hold still meester, you be waitress soon…” the man said as he fiddled with some controls outside the room.
“Hey,” I yelled as I pulled on the door, “Hey, let me out, what are you doing!”
“Please, I let you out when you waitress, okay!” a pink gas began flowing out a vent in the ceiling, I couldn’t help but breathe it in.
I thrashed on the floor choking, I couldn’t breathe, they were gassing me for asking where they got their waitresses. I gasped for breathe, unable to breathe as I thrashed on the floor. I finally blacked out, convinced it was the end.
“Misha, Misha wake up!” I opened my eyes to see a very angry looking Asian man.
I looked up confused, where was I, what had happened.
“Misha, you work at four, no sleep, work!” the man yelled.
I looked around, I was dressed in a pair of khaki woman’s pants, the material clinging to my large hips and butt. My boobs pushed against the fabric of my bright red House of China shirt. I sat upright, my jet black hair pulled back in a pony tail.
“Look at you self Misha, you look like sheet!” the angry man yelled, he towered over me, I felt so small.
I pulled out my compact from my purse and fixed my makeup and my hair and started my shift, happy to work another day at the House of China.
“Misha, Misha customer please!” a lady yelled out, it was Mi Su Yu, our resident law student and manager of the waitresses and she wanted me to help a customer.
“This Misha Suk Yu, she’ll take care of ALL of your needs sir, please follow her.” she said to the massive white man.
“Follow me sir,” I said to the huge white man, “You table dis way?”
I walked slowly to his table, knowing he was watching my butt, I swayed it side to side giving him a show to go with his dinner.
“Excuse me miss,” the man said as I walked, “Please don’t mind me asking, but how are there so many Chinese waiters working here when there are only nine hundred people in this town?”
I just smiled and shook my head, “Well sir, prease, let me show you, dis family business, follow me, once I show dis, you become employee, ‘kay?”
Note: this is making fun of a particular Chinese food joint I frequent and is no way an insult or derogatory story intended to insult people of Asian culture. Use of stereotypical language is not used to insult but to provide some measure of humor to the story. If I insulted, I apologize.
El Guapo
Comments
The idea is...interesting at least?
so many things I could say but I would prefer NOT to cause problems.
nice idea...but sorry, stereotyping even for humor can come off as racist.
however stereotyping aside it was a fun little read.
...uh my signature?
Well gee, where do I start...
The fact that you anticipated that your stereotypical portrayal of an ethnic group might be offensive should have clued you in. It is offensive. And it isn't funny. But I guess it's better to apologize than get permission, like they always say.
She was born for all the wrong reasons but grew up for all the right ones.
Con grande amore e di affetto, Andrea Lena
Love, Andrea Lena
Beg to Disagree
As a former salesman the bigger mystery
is where they spend their money.
Chinese restaurants are as American as
apple pie. Only the Chinese food taste
better. What's the point. Anything
American is fair game.
Well
When my own family refers to me in stereotypes, I guess one more can't hurt? After all, I can't get much further away than disowned, now can I? Thank you very much for making my day. Belle
maths
Hi.
If there are only 900 people in this town, half are probably women already, and if 1 male a day asks why there are only waitresses, in 450 days the town is all female with a massive food outlet. Which is possibly fine if the other women like chinese food :)
For the record I was not offended, and I can say that in the past I have been ashamed to be white by the behaviour of some whites when in the caribbean.
"Note: this is making fun of
"Note: this is making fun of a particular Chinese food joint I frequent and is no way an insult or derogatory story intended to insult people of Asian culture."
And you include a character called Mi Kuuk Cat? Have you tried that "joke" out on the staff at the Chinese "food joint" you frequent? I'm sure it would make you their favourite customer...
Best wishes, Andrea.
Stereotypes
Why is it that some stereotypes are worse than others? Nobody ever complains about stereotyping fat people, and few complain about stereotyping old people.
As for the pot calling the kettle black, we seem to have a lot of stories about bullies, jocks, jocks who are bullies, fathers who are bullies, intolerant families who disown their children, and so on, and so on.
OK, so not all of the fathers and athletes in these stories are portrayed in a negative light, but there are a number of stories where that is the case -- where just about every male figure in the protagonist's life beats upon her viciously.
Do you hear me crying "Foul?"
In the story Bike, there is some good-natured sniping between the various nationalities in the UK, and a major character is portrayed with a thick accent. Does anyone complain? Of course not! There is nothing to complain about.
Similarly, is there anything in the above story that seriously insults Orientals in general or Chinese in particular? None that I can see.
"Mi Kuuk Cat?"
It's well known that different cultures have different ideas about what is edible. If someone brings up the fact that I not only eat chicken, I humanely slit their little throats, drain out their life blood, cut them apart, and cook them, should I feel insulted? If I feel insulted by someone's mention of my dietary habits, I ought to consider changing them.
I mean, it's not like I eat haggis or black pudding or kidney pie or disgusting things like that. (Just kidding, Angharad. Please don't beat me!)
I try not to offend, but I don't bend over backward. I am definitely not an advocate of political correctness.
As far as that goes
the difference between the stories here and the one above is that many of our community were bullied, hurt abused, and teased. And sadly many still have fathers and mothers that may neglect them. The above story portrays an ostensibly harmless stereotype, but I would venture a guess that none of us have been met anyone of Asian descent that remotely resembles the characters described above. Bullies are not an ethnic group, but a sub-culture of destructive behavior. Parents portrayed here as being abusive or neglectful are still only a portion of the parents of this community. But when someone uses an ethnic slur or mocks a people by making up names, it is insulting because it insults anyone who is Asian, as opposed to parents who wouldn't feel uncomfortable about themselves by reading about a bad parent. I'm a father who had a bad father. I don't feel insulted in the least when a father is portrayed in a bad light unless the writer says all fathers are bad.
I hate to say this because it is very uncomfortable, but perhaps if you insert the word Jew or African-American and then use stereotypes such as the one above, you'll see why this is so hurtful. One of my best friends is Korean and my niece is married to a delightful young man from Tokyo. This isn't an issue about being politically incorrect. As I stated above, the author had already anticipated that the story would be insulting. That alone should have said something like, "Maybe this isn't a good idea after all."
She was born for all the wrong reasons but grew up for all the right ones.
Con grande amore e di affetto, Andrea Lena
Love, Andrea Lena
But...
Are those stereotypes truly insulting?
It's a fact that Oriental restaurants tend to have Oriental workers. I have also noticed, to a lesser extent, that Mexican restaurants tend to have Mexican workers -- a fact that lets my wife practice her language skills. The reason is partially because they tend (as mentioned in the story) to be family business, and partially because it lends the ambiance that one expects when dining in an ethnic establishment.
I agree that, emotionally, the stereotypes portrayed can make us Occidentals somewhat uncomfortable because there is some prejudice against Orientals. Still, when you think about it, the stereotypes portrayed are no more insulting than you see portrayed of other ethnic groups or subcultures.
I'm happy to be a country boy, and am comfortable enough with the stereotypes to have our family portrait taken with us all dressed in bib coveralls. The portrayals of of the various aspects of British culture are honest, but they might be considered insulting if one looked at them differently and maybe sprinkled some Irish jokes in the mix. There is a story called Blond Joke that could be called insulting if taken in the wrong light.
So, while I wasn't totally comfortable with the story, the reasons didn't really stand up to analysis. The story simply portrayed a standard Oriental family-owned restaurant with a rather unusual method of recruiting employees.