Healing Mishap
By Lanzaq
"I HAVE GIRLY EYES!" Cael yelled, causing it to echo around every corner, into every nook and cranny that the tripwire alarm hadn't reached. All the Party heard at that moment was a deafening roar. So loud was the roar that the cave itself quaked.

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Healing Mishap Part 1 of many.

"Where the hell is Kate!?" Roared Cael, the parties only magic user. "She was supposed to join us for this dungeon Crawl hours ago!" he continued, launching magical arrows in groups of three at the monsters in front of him.

"I don't know Cael, you know how Kate is, she is a ditz of a healer, she always seems to pop-up when we need healing the worst, and disappears just in time for when we need a resurrection." Arric, the bowman, said. "What do you think Ash, do you think Kate is showing up any time soon?" Arric said directing his attention to the tall swords woman who was busy hacking away at a group of nearby monsters.

"Dunno." Was Ash's short reply before she did a graceful swirling dance making contact with several vital spots on the monsters. She looked over at them before returning to her hack-and-slash approach to getting through the hoard of monsters that were dormant until Arric accidentally stepped on a trip-wire. Waking up every sleeping goblin and every tired ogre in the cave, and trust these adventurers, Goblins and Ogres are NOT morning people.

Before they could even kill the next monsters in front of them a petite blond headed healer appeared with a big smile on her face in the middle of the group through a blue ring of energy. "Hello Everyone! Sorry I am late, I got caught up in Capital with a bunch of young kids that needed to have some minor injuries tended to." She said brushing her hair over her shoulder. "Now...who needs to be healed?" she asked looking at her party members who just shot her an angry glare before returning back to the hoard in front of them.

"Ooo Cael, is that another Magic Arrow?" Kate asked looking at the young elf Cael. He stood taller than Kate, but not as tall as the man Arric. His hair was the shade of blond normally referred to as 'elf headed'. His eyes like a frozen lake.

"Cael has been studying hard to become the Capital's next Sage-General." is all Arric said before sniping an Ogre in the eye and watching it fall backwards on top of a group of very startled goblins. He sighed and ran a hand through his short salt and pepper hair. "did you know he has already mastered creating a razor wind? And what is impressive is that the sprat is only thirteen."

"Kate. Heal." Ash interrupted pointing at a gash across her arm where there was a gap in armor.

"Alright Ash, you know, you should really talk more, guys like tall women, you really should think about getting yourself a man, y'know, I mean you can only hope to stay a strong adventure for so long before guys lose interest in you, I mean you have Arric, but he is old enough to be my dad, and Cael, but if you tried to get his attention you would practically be robbing the cradle!" Kate said completely ignoring the fact that Ash needed to be healed.

Ash just sighed and ignored the wound and continued to attack as Kate continued on her tirade

"Why exactly do we have the two most strangest women in our Dungeon-Crawl group?" Arric whispered to Cael who just wiped sweat off his forehead and continued his magical assault on the hoard.

"I dunno, you tell me, Ash is so quiet and reserved and then we have Kate, the ever talkative Ditz of a healer..." Cael said summoning an Earth elemental out of the rocks nearby and commanding it against a group of Armoured goblins.

"Well, you know I have never been very good with women...."Arric trailed off shooting another ogre in the face. "I mean when I was ten, I got my first kiss from my local village girl, my parents got mad at me later because she was an elf, but hey, she kissed very well for a ten-year old elf."

"How...interesting..." was all Cael said before his elemental crumbled and he let out a string of elvish profanities. "Guys, this isn't going well...KATE get busy!"

"I know...its just Ash should really think about talking more...I mean she is so pretty and tall and exotic, I think that if she were to talk more she would really get a whole lot of male attention." Kate continued waving her staff around absentmindedly.

"Kate. Heal. Please." Ash asked again, the wound bleeding fairly badly. Cael was busy fending off three goblins with his staff that his magic had missed. Arric was now knee deep in imps that were too quick for his arrows.

"ahahaha, guys...I think we are in trouble...Kate tell us that you have that resurrection spell mastered this time right?" Arric said kicking at the imps with little to no effect. Cael was sprawled out on the floor, and Ash was staggering about from blood loss.

"Oh yeah. I have been practicing!" Kate said twirling her staff in her hand and dropping it. "...a little." She added meekly. Arric quickly removed a small dagger from his belt and continued to hack his way out of the pile. "Kate...how did you manage to practice Resurrection if it requires the target being dead?"

"Oh that's simple, You know the field with all the funny looking stones with names on them?" Kate said beaming. "I used the incantation, and it wasn't very long before I helped a LOT of people back from the dead."

Arric sighed and shoved the dagger back into it's sheath. "Kate....That's called a graveyard. That's where people who got sick or just got old and died went to sleep forever..." Arric said slowly trying to get Kate to understand just what she had done.

"Oh. Does that explain why when they got up they groaned and sort of shuffled around a bit like you do when you wake up at camp?" Kate asked her head tilted, and the staff in her hand tilted the same way as if mocking her.

A groan escaped Arric's mouth and Ash sort of stabbed at a couple of goblins while still bleeding badly. "Kate, Please. Heal." Ash Stuttered before falling on her back. Arric groaned louder, and tried to fend off the still coming onslaught.

"That sort of explains the zombie infestation we had a few days back at the capital." Arric said taking down a large troll with several shots to the chest and shoulder area. "Kate. Now, I understand you probably have something to tell me right now, but please you have two team mates that are downed and would thank you a LOT if you could help them out." By this time the onslaught was over as quick as it had begun, and silence loomed over the two like a thick fog.

"Okay!" Kate said smiling, breaking the silence. Waving the staff around making odd shaped symbols that hung burning in mid-air. Kate whipped through an incantation and by time she was done Ash was standing back up and her arm was no longer bleeding. "Ash, go get 'em." Kate encouraged before turning to Cael. With the same incantation and the same symbols Cael stood up however when he opened his eyes Arric just stared.

"Cael, you feeling alright?" He asked somewhat shocked.

"What, I don't feel different...why?" He asked giving a hard glare back. "Why are you staring?"

"Well uh. Your eyes." He said tossing him one of his daggers. Cael then shifted the blade around until he could get a good look at his reflection, however they eyes that stared back weren't his. They were a light pinkish colour.

"I HAVE GIRLY EYES!" Cael yelled, causing it to echo around every corner, into every nook and cranny that the tripwire alarm hadn't reached. All the Party heard at that moment was a deafening roar. So loud was the roar that the cave itself quaked.

"Well, this couldn't get much worse....Cael...I will have you know for the last thirty some odd years of my life, I have always received comments from my prospective lovers about how lovely my eyes are. They would then follow that comment up with something along the lines of it reminds them of their sister...or mother...or even their grandmother." Arric said. "And before you decide to scream some more, I want my knife back because we are in for hell." He stated.

"That's normal. You said yourself you have lousy luck with women..." he made a quick glance over at Kate and Ash who were in the middle of an albeit, one-sided, discussion. "I believe argument A supports anything and everything you could possibly counter-argument." he continued "Also since when since we first entered this dungeon were we NOT going into hell"

"Not fair using Kate against an ole man like me...and true very true this dungeon has been nothing but hell." Arric said looking at Cael and trying not to laugh and not doing a good job. "Those eyes are quite lovely, for a lady!" he said bursting into a fit of laughter before getting serious. "Get ready guys. I don't know what Cael woke up with his yelling but I doubt it will be friendly." he added nocking an arrow into his bow.

--- afterward.---

"Well Cael, it could have been worse..." Arric said stifling a laugh. "I mean you could have ended up with more than just eyes." He continued "Besides you got a decent robe."

"You get a special bow that allows for rapid fire arrows. Ash got two perfectly weighted swords. Kate even got something better than me. She got that staff that makes her healing sixty percent more effective." Cael ranted "I get a 'decent' robe that allows for quicker casting and a set of pink girly-eyes. Woohoo" he says with mock-enthusiasm.

"Cael, maybe you also got the way to pout like a girl when Kate botched your resurrection." Arric said glaring at him sternly. "You are acting like a five year old girl over how your eyes are no longer a blue. In honesty. I LIKE your eyes the way they are. Believe it or not, take it for what it is. The undrunk rambling of a fairly old man." He went on. "Your gaze before was powerful, but now it commands more than just power. So quit moping about and stand up like a man and face the world."

"Don't you understand. I am not a man, I am an elf. What do you think is one of the few things other than childbearing and birth that make an elf man different from an elf woman? His eyes. The clearer the blue the better your bloodline. However how do you think elves judge a woman's bloodline? The lighter the pink, the purer the blood." Cael said looking into a puddle. "With eyes like this it looks like my blood was untouched by so many poisons that have corrupted bloodlines for centuries. "

"CAEL. Listen to me. How old are you?" Arric said giving him a glare of pure iron. "What do you understand of the world and how things work?"

"Greetings strangers." A man says stepping forward out from a nearby store, dressed in cleric robes, half moon glasses, and a holy-man's mace at his hip. "I hear you two are dungeon-crawlers, need a cleric? I can resurrect!"

Cael looked ecstatic and Arric just sort of shrugged. "another healer wouldn't be bad. I guess he would be working while Kate was off being...Kate. Tell me Son, how many dungeon-crawls have you been on?"

The young man flustered at this. "Umm one." he said shuddering. "It wasn't good, we were a group of newbies against what was supposedly a hero's dungeon. I escaped with scars, however some of my friends weren't so lucky...I hope where ever they were reincarnated they are enjoying themselves."

"What is your name?" Cael asked looking excited at the healer. "My name is Cael Fairwind. I am the last of my family." He said extending his hand for a shake.

"Lanzer, just Lanzer, and I came from a small parish where I learned I had a knack for healing magics." he responded nervously running his hand over the back of his head. His dark brown hair seemed a mite unruly.

"Nice to meet you Lanzer, the name is Arric Verdin, Archer sharpshooter," He paused as two young ladies wearing courtesan dresses walked by "And lady-killer extraordinaire. If you excuse me." he said before chasing after the two.

"What an odd character." Lanzer said to no one in particular. "He seems quite tethered to this world. I hope when the time comes he can find inner peace." Lanzer continued, pushing his glasses up higher on his nose. "Now, I know you are not human, so tell me you little worm, why are you Dungeon-Crawling with three humans, why not find a group of your own maggots to go find your own treasure, in your OWN country."

Cael couldn't believe what he was seeing, the man who was nice and polite just a few seconds before was now degrading him and being outright racist. "You know how you are treating me is against the ruling of the king. He has a decree out that we are on equal standing."

"Under law Maggot, we aren't in court and you aren't defending yourself. I am Human, I am superior." Lanzer said running his finger along the edge of his right sleeve. "Wait. I understand why you are here. You are a freak!" He stated "Your eyes are pink, only the elf women have pink eyes. I understand perfectly, you couldn't be with your own maggot-people so you decided to be a freak with a group of people that accept yo-" His sentence was stopped short as the flat of Ash's blade met the back of his head and he dropped to the ground clutching it.

"Scum." she said, as she kicked him in a very tender place. "Cael is superior to you."

"She-witch. God hates Sympathizers. You shalln't find hope or peace in the future." Lanzer said before he stood back up on wobbly knees and walked away as dignified as he could. "Remember this, I hate you, and your people." he said before Kate appeared in front of him, a look of unhappiness on her face.

"You are no healer. True healers listen, and help as much as possible. You are the true maggot." Kate said bashing him on the head with her staff before walking over to Cael and Ash. "Lets go. We need to get Arric. I have a special request for a dungeon-crawl."

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I am tired, its two a.m. and I honestly can't believe I am actually going to post this...blah blah blah, something about leaving comments and how I need a proofreader.