Healing Mishap -17-
By LanzaQ

He whirled around quickly catching Lanzerus' mace before it met with the back of his head. “I have analyzed every strike, every pose and every little nuance of you. I have been watching from the very beginning when you first walked into my families general shop and told me to come with you or lose out on something great.”

---

Cael poked her head out into the hall, her face a colour comparable to a ripe tomato. “Can I have the dress, my shoes and backpack back?”

Kate quickly scooped up the objects of Cael's that were still in one piece, in other words, everything except the potions which Arric was busy trying to scoop what little still somewhat 'clean' potion into the bowl he fished out of his backpack. “Cael, here is all your stuff...'cept the potions.”

Cael just stuck her arm out and grabbed everything, before slamming the door shut again.

“That could have certainly gone worse.” Raleigh said, still trying to remove the embedded knife. “I mean If I were standing only a few inches over I would have had a new metallic implant.” he paused to see a still extremely shocked Verris on the floor. “even though I am sure she was aiming at YOU.”

Cael stepped slowly through the doorway. “Actually I didn't care who it hit...even the satisfying thump of my knife hitting the wall made me feel good.”

Verris scrambled to his feet, and started to slowly walk down the hallway away from Cael. “Well then I will just go and check on Ash, she has probably drunk enough by now to pickle her stomach.”

As Verris turned the corner he came head long into a very familiar man, followed by a very unfamiliar woman. “Frenar!” he said quickly as ethereal chains locked themselves around Erin

“Wait why are you...DEMON MAGIC.”

“Kate, Your stalker is back!”
---

“Et...I think we might need to do something, conceal our identity, go invisible. Something. Last time I had a run in with this group I was magically bound, and truth serum...ed.” Erin said casting a glance over his shoulder to look at the angry goddess trailing behind him.

“One, my name is Etoile, stupid mortal, and two, why would I need to hide who I am from my own niece.” she said. “I don't think you even use that thing you keep in the loft-space above your eyes.”

Erin turned the corner and almost ran face-first into a now bescarred, and amused individual, before he could do anything the man had chanted and Erin found himself stuck in place as ghostly chains wove their way around him. “Wait why are you...DEMON MAGIC."

“Kate, Your stalker is back!”

Etoile laughed. “Stalker? Erin, these people consider you to be my niece's 'stalker'?”

“Erin, Niece?” Verris said looking at the woman. “Wait a minute, if you are Kate's Aunt then that makes you a...Oh geez.” He said blanching before running back around the corner.

Kate turned around the corner to come face to face with Erin and Etoile. “Hello Aunt.” She spat. “Are you here to try and convince me to give up being a 'mortal' and live with you, and Uncle Leo?”

Etoile looked at Kate, genuinely hurt. “No dear, why would you ever think that was the reason I have spent trekking half-way across this world with this...thing.” she gestured to the still bound Erin. “To try and convince you to come and live with me and Leo?”

“No.” She admitted. “Then why are you here?” she glared at Erin. “And why with him?”

“Your Brother seems to think that I needed the company.”

“Khaos.” Kate said looking Erin in the face. “Are you nothing more than a Lackey? Did he send you after Mother's Necklace?”

“He sent me to help you. You can't fight HIM on your own. He has collected Heilige Shield, Creon's Mantle and The thousand League Boots.” Erin said. “I have Wicked Spike, He told me a member of your group would be able to use it to the best of its abilities.”

Kate briskly strode over and removed the sword from his possession. “Ash.”

---

Ash turned the corner just in time to watch Verris chain Erin in place. She watched the proceeding conversations and watched as Kate snagged what looked like a rusted sword from Erin and walked towards her. “Ash, take it and swing it once, in a direction that will cause the least amount of collateral damage.”

Ash smiled and pointed it in the direction of Erin before getting into a proper stance. “Fun.”

“No. Bad Ash. We don't go maiming the people that just delivered the sword, even if they might be nothing more than a puppet for your older brother to be using at his disposal.” Kate said. “And besides my Aunt might have found a mortal that she dislikes as much as my Uncle.”

Ash turned away from Erin and gave a quick controlled practice swing with the sword, it quickly glowed before expanding and become a large two-handed claymore. It was quite ornate with gilt edges and what could have only been described as a masterwork hilt, unfortunately it managed to take out a nice chunk of wall in the expansion. “I like it.” she said swinging it again trying to dislodge it from the wall.

“That is great, you can use a Wicked Spike, you must have done some terrible things in your past to pull that off.” Erin spat. “Like kill a puppy, maim a child...you know average things most civil war veterans did on an almost daily basis.”

Ash turned again only too look at Erin, no one else in the hall saw the glance but they did hear what she had to say. “You swine! I will murder you in your sleep! Ash DeVyria Laramorte doesn't stand to be insulted! Insinuations that I have preformed deeds so heinous that cowards would blanch and vigilantes would yearn for my head to rest at their feet. YOU ARE DEAD.” she paused to breath in. The sound of her grinding teeth was easy to hear for everyone in the hallway. “I spent five years after the civil war looking for work, FIVE YEARS, that I spent searching from every village and hamlet to every large trading city only to be turned away as soon as my task-master recognized my face from wanted posters. Do you understand how hard it is to live when you were one of the top leaders for the side that LOST a civil war!?” with a slink she drew her other sword. “I would rend your idiot head from your shoulders with the elegant sword you just gave me but, I can't seem to get it out of the wall just yet.” she lunged at Erin only to watch the bounds break on the spell Verris cast earlier. “Damn. I am going to quote my favorite author, however I fear it will be lost on a simpleton like you, but here goes. 'Thou art unfit for any place but hell.'”

before her blade could connect it was deflected as a silver stream seemed to jet through the air. Erin found himself on the floor as yet another throwing knife found it self a new home also lodged in the wall of the inn. Wicked spike fell from the wall with the blow that the small knife made as it hit the wall.

A man walked into view from one of the nearby rooms. “unfit for hell you say?” he laughed before rising from a bow revealing an eyepatch over his right eye. “And that Vigilantes would yearn for your head at their feet? Well Madam, I am a vigilante, and you are THE Ash DeVyria Laramorte?” he laughed “Let me greet myself I am the Mercenae Vigilante Darrius, or if you prefer Dark Darrius.” he said, waving his hands as two more durable daggers found their way into his hands. “Now excuse me, I need the bounty on your head, also I do enjoy a nice tale of kings on occasion but that author was actually a woman.”

---

Derrik awoke to a kick in the stomach. “Get up. It is time to test your actual combat abilities.” Lanzerus said watching Derrik stand slowly and draw the acolyte's mace at his hip. “Land one hit on me and I will consider your training done and we will find a tailor fit for a king to make your cassock. I will then refer to you as an equal. Are you ready to attempt your final test?”

Derrik shot him a glare that could chill an ice troll to the bones. “Yes. Father Lanzerus.” he said leaping and attempting to strike before he had a chance to raise his shield. “I have spent almost half a year training with you. You lash out at me for my mistakes and almost ignore my success. You starved me for positive attention while drowning me in beatings.” He whirled around quickly catching Lanzerus' mace before it met with the back of his head. “I have analyzed every strike, every pose and every little nuance of you. I have been watching from the very beginning when you first walked into my families general shop and told me to come with you or lose out on something great.”

“Finally thanking the man who delivered you into the light?” Lanzerus said easily parrying a blow. “You are still sloppy in your strikes.” he said kicking a sweeping low kick, taking Derrik's legs out from under him. “and you will probably die if this weren't my mercy being show to you.” He said as he stomped on his knee with a sickening pop. “Because if this were anyone else. If this were an elf, or any sort of supporter of the freaks you would be dead.”

Derrik gritted his teeth and the incantation came out naturally. “I don't think I can get to you alone. I am going to need help.” He quickly dropped his mace and let out the incantation that Lanzerus knew so well. In fact Lanzerus smirked as the large boulders in the nearby area came to life under magical stress and began moving. “ I realized the problem between my golem and yours. Your golem had some sort of sentience that I couldn't wrap my head around. However I figured it out.” he bowed his head quickly and recited a prayer in High-Church while Lanzerus looked at him quite amused.

Before he could get to Derrik to hit him the golem lurched forward and struck him, knocking him off balance and causing him to embed the bottom edge of Heiliges Schild into the ground. At this moment Derrik scooped up his mace off the ground and slammed it into Lanzerus' jaw. “No, you daft man, I wasn't thanking you. I was saying Thank you for proving that you are unfit to wield such artifacts.” He said as he watched Lanzerus fall to the ground unconscious.

“Also. Thank you for leaving them in such nice condition.” He said as he removed The Thousand League Boots, Heiliges Schild, and Creon's Mantle from his person. With a wave the golem crumbled and Derrik just let out a laugh. “hmm, It seems that I am actually a member of the High-Priesthood now? Isn't that what you said. 'Father.'?” he said spitting on the ground. “I might as well take the cassock too since I am robbing you blind.”

As the sun set behind him Derrik walked off leaving Lanzerus in the middle of nowhere with nothing, Taking his backpack, map, all his supplies, and even change of clothes with him. “I am not a dog to be beaten just because you are angry. I am a human being that appears to have more mental capacity than you, Father.” he sneered, before it quickly became a laugh. “And unfortunately for you, the nearest town, or even a stream to get water from is miles and miles away.”

---

Lanzerus regained consciousness slowly. The night breeze was cold on his naked body. “This is not going according to my plans.” he felt around his jaw. “But he does show promise. He definitely recognizes himself a member of the church if he took the time to steal the cassock as well as my supplies.”

Lanzerus laughed though. “Yet even after all that training the fool seems to think that stealing my water and food will kill me. The Lord is my savior and he will supply for my needs.”

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Well. It took a while for me to finally sit down and pound this one out. I really would like to extend an offer. now I have done this before only to stop and not rely on them but I really think it would be a good idea...I want a proofreader. I want the constructive criticism and feedback. Even if it takes even LONGER to get chapters out. I want someone who can take what I write and tweak it to make it all the better for those out there that read it, to enjoy it all the better.