“Jessica,” I said with a smile. “What do you think?” I said, twirling around.

“Wha...huh...what?” she stammered.

“I assume, despite your inarticulation, that you want to know what’s going on.”

“Do you think so?” she said, sarcastically. “When I left here the another day, you were totally freaked out and now look. Explain.”

“I was totally freaked out. I cried, I bawled. I had nightmares. I spent the first three days burying myself in work. I worked  eighteen hour  days to avoid dealing with this. I never left the house.”

“I figured. So what happened?”

“By the end of day 3, I had cabin fever. I was losing it. I don’t know what possessed me, but I started going through everything you left. Maybe it was like looking under the bed to confront the monster.”

“Uh huh...I still don’t get it. I mean your make-up is flawless, your hair is gorgeous, and I know that’s not one of my outfits, so I’m still missing something.”

“Well, you know me. I’m a perfectionist. If I was going to do this, I was going to do this right. So, first I started to look on-line for make-up tips. I wanted to learn everything. Day, evening, formal, informal, the whole 9 yards.”

“Well, it shows. You can do mine anytime you like. That doesn’t explain the hair. You certainly couldn’t do that yourself.”

“Oh no, Robert did it.”

“Who’s Robert?” she asked uncertainly.

“My stylist at Bumble and Bumble.   He  says I look gorgeous.”

“Bumble and Bumble,” she said incredulously. “Not only are you a perfectionist, you’re a little JAP, too,” she said, with a laugh.

“I’ve learned from the best...you.”

“Ha ha. What made you choose Bumble & Bumble?”

I handed her the In Style. “Look,” I said, flipping to Keira. I felt like we were on a first name basis now.

“I thought this looked familiar. You look adorable...no, hot. You look incredibly hot, Miss Jessica.”

“Why, thank you. And, by the way, my milkshake does bring all the boys to the yard.”

She laughed, “I don’t know if I like my new girlfriend, too much competition.”

“Oh, please,” I said, grabbing her left hand. “Look at this. You are off the market.”

She dropped her head. “True, such a shame, we could’ve done some major damage.”

“You’d still make a fine wingman.”

“Ha ha. OK. What’s really going on here?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, did you have some kind of revelation? The clothes, makeup, hair OK. You’re you.   You’re a perfectionist, so of course you’d try and look the role. But, what’s with the attitude? You were a blubbering nightmare the other day. Now, you’re a completely different person. What’s up? Seriously, no little jokes.’

“I don’t know. I’m still scared. I mean, I still live in fear of being found out. So, I don’t know, maybe subconsciously, I’ve figured if I play the role to perfection, I won’t get caught.”

“If you act out there like you just did in here, no one  will find you out without looking under your skirt. So, if you keep your legs closed like a lady, you’ll be OK,” she said, with a leer.

“Oh poo,” I mock pouted. “I was so looking forward to some straight boys.”

“Well, at least, I don’t have to worry about you getting knocked up before the wedding, you little slut,” she giggled. “Anyway, that dress is absolutely perfect for you. Where did it come from? Like I said, it’s not one of mine.”

“Ann Taylor, on  Madison.”

“Really,” she said, arching her eyebrow. “How did you know the right size?”

“I went into the dressing room and tried it on. How else would I know?" Her jaw dropped. “You went into the dressing room. YOU? You who were afraid to go outside the other day are now trying on clothes in public; talk about confronting your fears, little Miss Jessica.”

“First off, it was a separate room, not one of those bullpen deals. Second, it was like two in the afternoon, so I figured no one  would be there. Third, if I felt in anyway like the saleswoman knew something was up, I would’ve been out of there like a shot. But she didn’t, because she told me I had a perfect figure for skirts and she kept bringing me stuff to try on...”

“Wait a minute,” she interrupted. “How much stuff did you try on?”

“I don’t know. 5-10 outfits. There.”

“How many places did you go to?”

“A whole bunch. Once she didn’t read me, it actually became kind of fun. Like being an actor or something.”

“How much did you buy?”

“You’ll have to fill up my debit card again. There’s maybe $100 left. A girl has to look her best.”

She laughed, “Ohmigod, you little princess. This is going to be sooo much fun, you’ll see. Let me see what you bought.”

I went into the bedroom, and came out wearing a black skirt and baby blue top, with a pair of black 3" heels. “Very nice. Very demure. Next.”

Next  were a pink skirt, white top, pink cardigan and 3" pink heels. “Oooh. Look at you; Very Bree. One problem - Has anyone told you you’re Jewish, not a WASP?”

“Oh, please. I have the perfect coloring for this.”

“Perfect coloring? Now, you’re worrying me.”

“Relax. Just my perfectionism, and the saleswoman.”

“Remember, she’s just out for commission. Did you buy all of Ann Taylor?”

“Wait. I’ll show you my other stuff.”

I came out with another delicate floral print skirt and white sweater. “What do you think?”

“You look great. But remember, girls are made of sugar and spice. And, girlfriend, you need more spice.”

I arched my eyebrow. “Just wait a minute. I’ve been doing my homework.”

I came out wearing a black tank top that said “Bomb Shell,” a black leather mini, fishnets and 4" black Manolo spikes. “Well?”

Lisa’s jaw dropped and then she started laughing. “OK, Miss Thing. That’s a little over the top, no? I mean, all you need is a whip...”

“Wait a minute, and I’ll get it.”

“Boy, I am learning all about you today. We need to get your shrink here. This is like intro to Pysch all over again.”

“So, what do you think?”

“I think you’re actually starting to loosen up. That outfit, for example, screams loose."

“That,” I said, with eyelashes batting, “is exactly what I’m going for.”

“I’ve created a monster. Hey, wait a minute,” she said, pointing at my feet. “Where did you get those?”

“I took them from your place.”

“Uh huh. Am I going to have come over here every day and get my clothes back?”

“We’ll see. I may have to buy more, as my size drops. Which brings me back to an old question - how am I going to work out?”

“I’ve thought about that. Maybe we can get a visitor’s pass in your new name?”

“I’ve thought about that too. But there’s two problems - #1, they’ll need I.D. and #2, where do I change? I mean, I am a knockout, but there’s still the problem of my little friend...”

“Hmmm. I hadn’t thought about that...I guess you’ll have to go as a guy,” she sighed.

“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’ll work out up the block, so I can come home and get dressed quickly. I won’t be Brian any longer than necessary, OK?”

“OK. OK. ”

“Very funny, Lise.”

“Anyway,” she said. “Let’s get you out of that skank outfit and into something normal, so we can get dinner.”

“Sure, can we go to Cabana on 60th?”

“Why? In the mood for pan-Latin?”

“Kind of, also, I saw the most gorgeous 3" black boots in Jimmy Choo that I want to pick up...”

She slapped her forehead. “Bri..Jess..whoever you are, you’re really starting to scare me.”

______________________________________________________________________

We went into my bedroom.   Lisa gaped at the bags on my bed.   "Whoa.   Bebe, Ann Taylor, Scoop NYC.   When you go, you go all the way, don't you?"

"A girl, even a temporary one, has to look her best."

"I'll say it again - you are really beginning to worry me.   You are just taking to this too well and too quickly."

I gave her a peck on the cheek.   "Don't worry.   This is truly temporary.   I like who I am.   I'm doing this for you, remember."   I held up a black knee length leather skirt and black turtleneck.   "So, how's this? Does it work with the heels?"

"That is much better."   I began stripping off my clothes.   "What are you doing?" Lisa said.

"Getting dressed and undressed?"

"I see that.   But, four days ago, you refused to get undressed in front of me and now, it's perfectly normal."

"I'm going to have to do this at some point in a public or semi-public place.   I may as well get used to it.   Now, how do I look?" I asked, giving a twirl.

"Absolutely beautiful.   No, wait, radiant.   Jess, you are stunning."

I blushed.   "Let's get going.   I want to get to Jimmy Choo before they close.   Let me just touch up my face."

Lisa whistled.   "You do that perfectly.   When you take on a project, you take it on one hundred percent."

"It's my father's one useful piece of advice, the bastard.   Do something right or don't do it.   I'm sure he'd love to see how I put his advice to work."

We left the apartment and went to Jimmy Choo's.   I bought the boots, and Lisa bought me a pair of 3" pink slides.   She said they'd go great with my "little Miss Junior League" outfit.

We walked into Cabana.   Well, actually Lisa walked and I sashayed.   I don't know why, but I just felt like doing it.   It paid off.   I felt every set of eyes staring at me.   Men ogled me, and women glared.   I have no idea why, but it felt great.   Lisa came back from the hostess desk.   "She said it would be ten to fifteen minutes.   Do you want to wait at the bar?"

"Sure," I said.   "I'm tired from spending your money.   I could use a mojito."

Lisa laughed.   "The way you're acting, it's like your Jim's revenge on me for being me to him."

I sat up on a bar stool, and crossed my legs at the ankles, just like my teacher said.   Well, that and I still had something standing in my way of crossing them any higher.   I could feel someone looking at me.   I looked up and saw the most stunning Black man I had ever seen looking at me.   I looked at him, then quickly looked down and then up.

"Why, Miss Jessica," Lisa said.   "I do believe you are flirting with that man at the other end of the bar."

"He is absolutely stunning."

"And," she said, warily "very straight looking.   Be careful.   Something tells me he wouldn't be too happy to find out your little secret."

"Relax, mom, it's just flirting," I said, as the Black god and a friend walked over.

He held out his hand.   "Jeffrey Walker."

"Jessica Rosen.   Pleased to meet you, Mr. Walker."

"Call me Jeff."

His friend stuck out his hand to Lisa.   "Todd Bernstein or, as is more appropriate, wingman."

Lisa smiled.   "Lisa Wasserman.   I'm engaged."

"Me too," said Todd.   "I truly am the wingman.   I'm just here to distract you so Jeff can work his magic."

"Well, Miss Rosen," said Jeff, looking me over.   "What about you?   Has someone already swept you off your feet, or will I have that pleasure."

I gave him the once-over.   "Does that line work often?"

"I don't know.   Does it?"

I picked up his tie and ran it through my fingers slowly.   "We'll see."

Todd looked at Lisa.   "Your friend really has to learn how to open up.   She's so pretty, but that shyness is just awful."

Lisa rolled her eyes.   "I know.   We've been working on it.   But Jeff needs to work on his self-esteem.   He'll find it much easier to meet women if he does."

"Can I interest you ladies in joining us?"

"I'm certainly interested," I said, "if it's OK with Lisa."

"Far be it from me to stop what's shaping up to be a very interesting evening."

Todd went over to the hostess.   "She can seat four, but it will be close quarters, if that's OK."

"Fine by me," said Lisa.   "Just don't try anything funny," she said, with a laugh.

"I spent last Saturday registering.   The last thing I want right now is to get near any woman," he said, with a laugh.

Jeff rolled his eyes.   "Maybe we should just get a table for two and let these boring married types talk to each other."

I brushed his arm.   "There'll be plenty of time for that later, if I so choose.   Relax."

Lisa choked on her drink, and we all turned.   "Sorry," she said.   "Wrong pipe.   Right, Jessica?   Wrong pipe?"

"OK.   OK.   So long as you're OK."

Jeff turned to her.   "Don't worry.   I don't bite."

"Oh poo," I said.

Todd turned red.   "I keep saying it.   Get past the shyness."

The waitress took us to a very close booth for four.   I sat across from Jeff, and Lisa from Todd.   They fell into a conversation about places to look at for the wedding, places to avoid and all that sort of thing.   Jeff and I started talking about work.   He and Todd were investment bankers for CSFB.   They traded derivatives.

"They're a bit hard to understand," he said.   "If you're not interested, I'm sure we can find something to talk about."

"Actually, I helped develop Amex's proprietary trading system.   I'm actually somewhat conversant in the terminology, although I don't follow the derivatives markets closely."

"You helped develop the system?"

"Yes.   I'm a computer consultant."

"Really," Todd piped up.   "You don't look anything like our IT consultants.   First off, they're all male.   Second, they're all named Kumar or Ivan.   You must have had your pick of guys in college."

Lisa interjected, "Not really.   Jessica's really just come into her own.   If you went to college with her, you wouldn't even recognize her."   I gave her a kick.

"Give me your card," said Todd.   "I know some people in IT who can make it worth your while."

"Thanks," I said, caught off guard, "but I'm really swamped lately.   I wish I, uh, could handle the work, but I have, uh, too much as is.   But, uh,  thanks."

"Relax," said Jeff, taking my hand as I felt a jolt.   "No one's forcing you to take work," he said, massaging my inner wrist with his fingers.   It felt so good that I  felt like melting into the booth.

"Mmmm, Jeff," I said, secretly massaging his leg with my foot.   "Aren't you being just a little forward?"

"Am I?"

"OK, a little premature.   And premature is never a good thing."

"That's never my problem, rest assured.   I can keep this going for hours, if you can." I thought Todd and Lisa were going to vomit.   Todd started simulating a bad bass line.

Jeff turned to him.   "What's that about?"

"I figured if I was going to sit through a porno, I'd have  the appropriate  background music."

Lisa chimed in, "I never believed these letters were true..."

Todd turned to her.   "Quoting 'Forum?' Why, it's such a shame we're both engaged.   If you like the Yankees, we'll run away together, catering hall deposits be damned."

"Won't your fiancee mind?"

"Nah.   At this point, I'm an afterthought to her big party."

"That's not true.   Who else can we blame for your mother if you're not there."

The waitress brought dinner.   "Thank god," said Jeff.   "Now Todd will have something to keep his mouth busy."

"Keeping his mouth busy, huh?   And, what do you like to do to keep yours busy?   I mean, do your female friends usually approve of what you do?"

He didn't flinch.   "Actually, they usually like what I do.   They let me know, multiple times."

Lisa took my arm.   "Excuse us," she said.   "Jess, can you come with me to the ladies' room?"

"Excuse me.   Lisa needs help."

We went into the ladies' room, and she hissed at me.   "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Flirting.   I'm letting go, like you said."

"Buying shoes is one thing.   But that is something else.  I don't talk that way with Jim."

"What's the big deal?"

"Look, all it takes is one misplaced hand of his, and you'll be beaten to a bloody pulp.   Look, I'm all in favor of a little harmless fun but you're crossing the line."

I turned to her and snapped.   "Don't worry.   It's talk, just talk.   Would I love to see what he's got in his pants?   Absolutely.   Am I going to put myself at risk?   No.   But thanks for your trust in me.   You know what?   Fuck you.   You put me in this position, tell me to go with flow and, when I do, you think I'm a fucking idiot.   Thanks a hell of a lot," I said, walking to the door.

"Wait, Jess, I'm sorry."

"You should be."

"It's just, I don't know, it's like you're my little sister and you're just finding out about boys and I don't want you to get hurt.   But, unlike a real little sister, you have something that could get you in real trouble.   I'm sorry," she said, reaching out with tears in her eyes.

"It's OK," I said, hugging her.   But I'm not a kid.   I'm 34.   I've been screwed in relationships before."

"Yeah, but never like this."

"Don't worry, Lise.   I have it under control."

We went back to the table.   Jeff and Todd stood up.   "I was beginning to worry," said Jeff.   "What took so long?"

"Oh, you know girls," said Lisa.

We started eating again.   As much as I wanted not to do so, I toned down the flirting for Lisa's sake.   We started talking about families.

"I bet your parents must be very proud of you, Jess," said Todd.   "I mean, you're beautiful and successful."

"Not exactly.   My mother's dead and let's just say I'm not what my father wanted."

"Really?   How is that possible?   Or is he one of those assholes who only wanted a son?"

"Something like that," I said, exchanging sideways glances with Lisa.

"Well," said Jeff.   "If I ever get the chance to meet him, I'll set him straight."

I smiled, and touched his hand.   "Hold up there, Tiger.   Who said anything about meeting anyone's parents?"

"Touche, Jessica," he laughed.   He had the most sexy laugh.   I wanted to rip off his clothes right there, but realized Lisa was right.   It killed me.

The waitress brought the check.   Lisa said, "How much do I owe you?"

Jeff and Todd both laughed.   "Thanks to Jessica, we talked about work.   Therefore, thank CSFB.   The meal's on the derivatives desk."

"What an evening," I said. "Charming company, and a free meal.   How lucky can we get?"

"That's up to you," Jeff said, taking my hand.

I arched my eyebrows, and started running my fingernail on his wrist. "Oh, really?"

Lisa coughed.   "Ahem, I hate to break up you two, but remember Jess, you have to help me with the..uh..engagement party.   Remember?" she said pointedly.

I glared at her, but saw the same look I saw in the bathroom.   "Oh yeah.   That's right.   I'm sorry, Jeff.   Raincheck?"

"Sure," he said.   "I'm a little disappointed, as I'm sure are you.   But let me have your number, and I'll give you a call."

"Tell you what," I said, leaning in to give him a kiss.   "Give me your number and I'll call you."

Todd and Lisa laughed loudly.   "Oh shit," said Todd.   "The player gets played.   This is going to be fun tomorrow at work."

"Oh yeah?" Jeff retorted.   "Try it, and I'll tell everyone about your little discussion tonight about which place settings you preferred."

Jeff leaned in and gave me a deep kiss. "Just a little preview.    Goodnight, ladies.   Jessica, you will call, of course."   Damn Lisa.   Why couldn't I follow through on this?

We stood there for what seemed like forever.   Lisa broke the silence.   "Asking for his number?   Nice save, kiddo."

"You know, because of you, I won't be able to sleep tonight.   Did you see how gorgeous he was?   And that kiss?   My god, I can only imagine what he'd be like."

"Imagine is right.   I hate to burst your bubble, but you don't have the bubble he wants to burst, if you get my meaning."

"A girl can dream, can't she?"

"Don't worry, Jess.   Your needs will be taken care of."

"OK," I said.   "First Jim, now you.   What the hell does that mean?"

"Good things come to those who wait.   And haste makes waste."

{to be continued.   Please post comments.}