Mirror Changed - Chapter 09
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~Jameson~
The pub was pretty run of the mill. High end set up masquerading as an old time Irish drinking hole. Wooden topped bar looking hand carved and well oiled. Mirror behind with plentitudes of liquors for the discerning customer on various shelves. The lighting was a dim amber, reminiscent of candleflame and oil lanterns. Tables in the corners and actual wooden barstools that were not bolted in place.
All in all not a bad pub.
And nothing at all near what an authentic pub of the old world would be like.
He would know. After all the young looking man dressed in a depression era tweed suit and pork pie hat had been to the real deal.
Andrew Jameson had traveled a bit in his life. Seen places and events that many would have loved to see. Many more that he same people are probably extremely glad they have only read about.
Today he sat in a corner of the bar. A small bottle of top shelf whisky from a distillery north of Belfast.
An older man, in his late fifties, sat down next to him. Dressed similarly, though his suit looked a bit worn and frayed. Hair going to grey with the heavyset build of a life of hard labor at the docks or with freight companies.
“Daniels.”
“Jameson,” he nodded in reply. “Andrew. How is it every time I see you, you seem the same while I feel the full weight of father time on my shoulders?” His dark tanned craggy features were those of a southern Italian and when he reached for a full snifter of the whisky his hamhock of a hand engulfed the glass.
Jameson held up his own small glass. His hands much smaller and refined. Those of a British noble family’s descent. “The passage of years weighs on each of us regardless of their looks. To each a burden and to each a different weight.”
The dockworker lifted his glass in toast. “To the years. May they continue to march on.”
“Hear hear.”
The glasses clinked quietly. The sound of fine leaded crystal rather than plain silicate-based material. After a sip Daniels sat back contemplating the amber liquid as he let if low over and around his palate.
“You broke out the old glassware.”
Jameson nodded and patted a small purple heartwood box on the counter near to him.
“And that isn’t from behind the counter. It’s too smooth, too complex.” Daniels swirled the small glass again before taking another small sip. “This isn’t local either. European?”
“Irish, and thank you for coming.”
“It must be important for a sip of this ambrosia.”
“Reasonably. I am touching base with some old friends.” Daniels snickered at Jameson’s use of ‘Old’ “looking for information regarding any oddities. Reports of events that don’t match up to the official news groups. Large disturbances or explosions.”
“My friend, there is such a thing as the internet now-a-days. Even an old fogy like you should keep somewhat up with the times.”
Jameson smiled sadly. Almost as if reminiscing of the days of old. “I really have never found the time Daniels. Things just seem so much more complex than they need to be. Besides, didn’t you tell me last year that the internet would never replace the word of mouth?”
“That was over a decade ago my old friend. Besides it didn’t replace the word of mouth. The word of mouth moved online.” He paused to look curiously at the man who looked young enough to be one of his grandchildren. Maybe even one of his great grandchildren playing dress up. “One day we are going to have to get you a smartphone.”
It was Jamesons turn to shake his head. “Sure. Sure. Someday. Maybe after my current mission.”
“Will you finally share your secret fountain of youth then?”
He just smiled mysteriously. Not with humor or mischief, almost a melancholy of a sad secret. The smile of a person with a piece of valuable information that no one else has that he must carry to the grave no matter what he would wish to do with it.
“Damn you old man.” Daniels fumed, a genuine anger on his face. “I’ve helped you all these years because you saved my father in the Korean War. If he hadn’t insisted all those decades ago I wouldn’t even know you.”
“I am aware of your burden, and I am sorry that I may not be more forthcoming. It is my burden as well. I also made a promise to your father. To follow your life, to help you and yours and make sure that you are taken care of. I have never involved you in the things he saw in Korea. He made me promise that as well. You and your family have been a great help as just eyes on the ground. To verify or to find.”
Jameson topped off both glasses before he continued. “I have always valued your friendship Lyman. However, I do age. I am not immortal. Things are… different. We have discussed this before. So please enjoy the gift. I will make sure to wire you some extra funds for your troubles in this. And please be safe. Give my love to the wife.”
As Jameson stood to go he left the liquor case and bottle behind. Daniels finished the drink down in a single shot. He responded gruffly, a deep sadness to his voice. “She passed away.”
“When?”
“Two years ago. You never responded to the invitations. Or the messages.”
“I am so sorry. It would have been … hrmmm.. May then? I was… occupied.” Jameson was a little distracted as he attempted to put a timeline to when he would have been that far out of pocket.
Daniels shook his head. “Even if I didn’t know you were old already, the way you act is a dead giveaway. Some advice from an old friend whether you take it or not. Learn to live. You have the strength and vitality of a twenty-year-old. Enjoy it. Cherish it.”
“Another friend of mine tells me this as well.”
The old dock worker shook his head as he waived Jameson off. “Youth is wasted on the Immortal. Bah.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~Jayde~
The trash area of a fast-food joint. What a wonderfully odorific location to take a break.
Had too though. With everything going on, all the weirdness and my own personal mistakes and self-destructions. It all made it both wonderful and incredibly frustrating to work in the much more mundane world. Had to keep it up though, after all I didn’t have much choice. Needed to eat and needed to pay the rent. I did not relish the idea of being homeless.
Luckily for me, we had just been paid and some of my extra hours had caught up on my bills. Still though, I was a bit short on cash. As if that was anything new. Another perk of fast-food places however was that we employees could often get discounted or even free food.
Thinking of which, I saw the back entrance open up and Becky came out with a small entrée box filled with some extra tacos and burritos made for the rush that hadn’t been sold. Technically she was likely out back to ‘Throw’ them away. In reality she sat down next to me and handed me a dollar menu bean something or other.
“Mmmmm… afternoon leftovers.”
“Just like momma used to make.”
I held my half-unwrapped thing and Becky tapped it with her own.
“Thanks Becky. Don knows I’m a bit cash shy, so he’d probably dock my pay for this if I’d’ve taken it out.”
“No problem. Though you owe me.” She said around her own bite.
Our managers knew that the employees took advantage of unsold leftovers, and corporate policy stated that no prepared product sit for longer than fifteen minutes. So about every hour or so there was at least some spoilage. Most managers just turned a blind eye. Even Don. For everyone but me it seemed sometimes.
“I’ll see if I can get you back for the food sometime. Say next payday? I’m still strapped right now.”
She shifted a little next to me. “I’m not talking about the food. You’d do this for me after all.”
“Oh, you mean covering for my shift the other day? I’m really so sorry about that.” Considering that I had missed half my shift because of freaking out about the Dream I had been exceptionally lucky that Becky and another Co-Worker had pretended to Don that we had all traded and Becky had forgotten. I really did owe her for that.
“Not that either. Guess again.” She said in a teasing voice.
I thought for a few minutes. “Well, I’m pretty sure I paid back that hundred, and helped move your friends place for when you guys helped me with mine. Uh… I helped you get hired here for when you helped me get a job at that burger joint after pizza hut…” I was ticking off my fingers. Took another bite to chew over as I thought back. I was always careful to repay my debts as fast as possible so I didn’t get in too deep. “Umm…. I can’t really think of anything else…”
She hit the back of my head with the flat of her palm. Not enough to hurt, just enough to knock my noggin slightly forward and dishevel my hair further.
“Dolt, it’s a wonder you even remember to put your shirt on right-side out sometimes. You owe me for ditching me at the party.”
“Huh? Whyzat?”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full, you mumble your words.”
I swallowed my bite. “Why is that?’
She rolled her eyes. “Because I invited you and I expected to show you a good time. Then you up and left after only an hour. You ditched me on the fecking lawn you dorkus. I had been really looking forward to that party you know.”
Uh… What?
“Why did my being there or not have anything to do with enjoying the party? I mean it looked like it was a blast if you knew people but I didn’t know anyone but you.”
“You dolt.” She stated quietly. “Well, that’s past now isn’t it?”
I nodded and grabbed a taco.
“So now you can make it up to me. There’s another party tonight. So after work, get cleaned up and this time I’ll pick you up.”
Now I felt a bit panicked. I Really did Not want to deal with people. Especially people I did not know. “I’m… well… that is… I’m not sure…”
“Jayde, I know you’re shy and socially awkward. That doesn’t matter to me. Just come with me, okay?”
Oh I so wanted to go with her. But I was actually getting scared now. Not just anxious but scared. What if Suzi or Dave were there? Or Crazy Angel Lady? I wasn’t ready to face anyone but Becky, Bryan, and work.
Work was a very distant third.
“I don’t think it’s a very good idea right now.” I said quietly.
“And why is that?”
“Things have been, well, hectic lately.”
“All the more reason to get out and enjoy yourself.”
“I have some… things…. I need to process Becky. They’re pretty important to life things too. I really don’t want to be around more people than I absolutely have to right now.”
I was pretty down when I said that. My hunger had disappeared halfway through the taco. The aftertaste of my last bite turning to bile in my mouth.
Becky appeared to take some level of solace in my answer at least. We sat in comfortable silence for a time. Her munching on her third item, me holding the unfinished remains of my second. I thought about the other night with Suzi and how my friendships seemed to be destructing on each other one by one. Was this what it was to grow up? To leave everything and everyone behind until all you are left with are strangers and bills? If I had known this in high school I would never have been so eager to move on.
Finally Becky had had her fill and stood to go back in. “There’ll be other parties and things to do later Jayde. When you’re ready we’ll do something.
She went inside. I watched her go and looked down at my work outfit.
Maybe life hadn’t really been so bad. It was too bad that I never seem to realize that until it had passed me by.
I felt like a bad country song.
Country song… I can’t believe I just compared myself to a damned country song. I must be more messed up than I thought.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~Jayde~
“Alright, Spill It.”
Huh? Now what? “I’m not sure what you mean Bryan.”
He loaded the wood and nails from a pallet cart into the back of his small Toyota pickup. “you’ve been more squirrelly than usual these last two weeks.”
“Well, yeah. I guess so.”
Dang it. Now even Bryan’s starting to notice and bug me about it all.
“Sooooo…?”
“Yeah. I guess so.”
“Jayde. We are not going to have a ‘Dude’ ‘Sweet’ ‘Dude’ “Sweet’ back and forth. So do you mind fessing up?”
They had just finished loading up from the Home Depot and needed to walk the cart back into the place. Bryan was adding a new gaming and DVD shelf to his place and wanted company so ended up dragging me out of my place.
Which was a good thing I guess.
I was a bit too much of a shut in lately. Since Tuesdays were one of Bryan’s few days off I spent most of it with him. This was our third errand of the day, and with some clouds rolling in I wasn’t sure how much longer we’d be out.
“Crazy lady chased me, walked out on a party which pissed off my co-worker who had invited me there. Haven’t been sleeping well, which is causing me to be on edge, and I told Suzi how I feel which caused her to go cold and withdrawn and friendzoned me officially. So, you know, late teen drama and all that shit.”
Bryan and I got in the truck before he answered. “Damn, that’s brutal. Seriously? She completely friendzoned you?”
“Yeah, I haven’t heard from her since. I really fucked up this last couple of weeks.” Mentioning all that seemed safe. As long as I remembered not to mention anything about the Dream, and especially about Her, I think I wouldn’t ending up fucking things too much with Bryan as well.
“Harsh. Did she tell you why?”
“No. She just referred to our friendship and how that was really all it is and ever was.”
“I’m not surprised.”
I was not totally sure how to continue the conversation at that point. That and the pretty tomboy in my reflection looked contemplatively back at me. She had nothing to offer other than the sadness in her stormy grey eyes.
“What do you mean ‘Not Surprised.’?”
He fidgeted a little while he drove. “Well, we all knew you were crushing on her bad. And well…? Suzi’s the type to speak her mind. So her reasons are really her own to tell.”
“Great. Everyone’s so damnably secretive. It’s like I’m the last to know anything.”
“Don’t be too depressed Jayde. Part of it is your own secretive nature as well you know.”
I looked over at him instead of towards the road or the mirror besides me. “What? I’m not secretive.”
“You totally are. Never talk about yourself or what’s going on in your life. Getting information out of you is like pulling teeth sometimes. Hells bells man. Getting you out and about can be just as much a pain in the ass!”
After a bit we pulled into the covered carport outside his place. Me uncomfortably deconstructed by my friend, who had turned into a terribly accurate psychoanalyst. Problem was? He was right. I just didn’t want to admit it. After all, it made it sound like I was a reclusive shut in.
That couldn’t be it… could it?
We were a bit silent as we unloaded the supplies to make his new shelving. With the obligatory boxes of books and DVD’s he had nabbed by the pound at a clearance sale today. We worked in the light Seattle drizzle getting everything inside. Not really wet, but a little damp. Finally we were finished unloading and feeling a touch cold standing in his living room. The somewhat awkward silence returned now that the heavy lifting was done.
Bryan broke the silence by asking something. It took me a moment to realize he had asked if I wanted something to drink. I just nodded. He took a moment to grab a pair of Mtn Dews from the fridge. I could definitely use some of the nuclear green carbonated death water after everything.
Can in hand, I stood and contemplated the job. With the materials in hand it looked like another type of bachelor fabulous room in the making. Everything would sure fit in with the current décor.
“What are you gonna do now Jayde?”
I looked over at Bryan in confusion. What am I going to do? About what?
“Don’t look so clueless about it man. You’ve got problems. So what? Or better yet, now what?” Bryan was using his own can of soda to emphasis his point.
“I don’t know. All I seem to be able to do is just keep treading water. Ya know… to keep my head afloat? I’m living paycheck to paycheck. Only one wreck of a night away from missing my rent.” I sat down on his thrift store couch in a whuff. “Hell, I’m down to my work clothes and two pair of jeans for outfits. What happens when I have to replace any of them?”
“Have you considered looking into rooming with someone? I’m sure the rent would be cheaper than even that old rattletrap corner studio you’re in.”
“Yeah I have. Last month I even went to talk to a few of them. I just don’t know if I could get along with someone I don’t know.”
Bryan laughed. I had no clue what he found so funny so I just waited for him to explain.
“Once again, you have just shown how much of a recluse you are.” He paused, getting serious. “Jayde… Have you considered getting some therapy for your social anxiety?”
“Uh… I have no clue what you’re talking about. Besides I can’t afford therapy. I can’t even afford health insurance.”
He looked at me in astonishment. “What? You haven’t applied for Medicaid? You’re only making about a dollar or two above minimum wage.”
My face flushed in shame. He was absolutely right about my social status. Bottom of the pile. Last in line. Lowest on the rung. I looked down at my open and mostly untouched can.
“I don’t want to be a leach on the system. I’m healthy and when I can afford insurance I’ll get it.”
The response was just a shake of the head. Most likely at me, but at least Bryan didn’t press the point. Instead he picked up the first one of the four foot long pre-cut boards and fit it to the metal frame that was part of the setup. The whole setup would make it so that he could put screws through the metal parts and not wood on wood. It wasn’t as pretty, but it was very functional. Which was one of the things I liked about Bryan. He cared more about how well things worked rather than a pretty façade that may just be pressed over junk.
“Alright. Grab a screwdriver and put a couple screws in this will ya?”
I took hold of the material in question and got to work. Much was on my mind. At least instead of conversation Bryan put in a cheesy B-Rate movie. Something I could swear was based on Five Nights at Freddy’s, but what do I know. We worked to the screams and cheesy lines of a badass wannabe while drinking soda and making inane comments.
Why couldn’t more of my days be like this?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was walking in the rain once more. Hands in pockets and not a star in the sky. Which was pretty normal for this area. Once again Seattle had given me weather to match my mood.
The simple pleasure I had gotten from helping assemble the shelf and eating some leftover spaghetti from Bryan’s was already fading away. Leaving a sense of ennui in its place. The calm of it was nice even if the fatalistic feeling of my lack of worth wasn’t something normally pleasant. It was more that the world seemed to come into a greater focus now. To become more crystal, as if I had finally come to a better point of lucidity as it was to my purpose in this world.
Which really did not account for much. I didn’t bother listing my problems or failings. Not even to myself. Instead I just meandered on a rough course home. Letting the misting rain gradually drench me to the bone. I have seen other people walking along in what must be similar moods. Even then I could not bring myself to care. This was just the way things were. By simple merit of deduction I was just a fleshy cog in the great machine of consumerism.
The Dream and the ongoing reflections notwithstanding, I really didn’t bring any worth more than a warm body to fill a position of menial untrained labor. My father had at least been right about that.
I think I had been walking for more than an hour when I saw a flash of red out of the corner of my eye. I hoped.. I really really… really… hoped that it was not my psycho stalker.
No such luck.
It was her.
Dressed in a variant of the same outfit as before. Looking better than almost any superheroine in a high budget television show. It’s too bad she was likely one of the supervillains instead. She was a bit more than half a block away and across the street. I only spotted her because she was so visually loud. If the woman had dressed like everyone else who was out and about in the drip and drizzle I would have missed her completely. Even with her vibrant red hair.
Well, a little silver lining to her showing up. Fear had now gotten me out of my depressive funk. Instead it was replaced by a shot of adrenaline straight to the spine. A bit of shock front and center stage.
“Crap.”
Hopefully she hadn’t spotted me and it was just another random encounter. I kept my head down and at the next intersection made the turn towards the mall. Hopefully there were at least some people in the theater I could blend in with like last time.
Two blocks later and it was confirmed. Psycho Stalker mode had been activated.
“Jeeze, she’s worse than those creepy clowns at Halloween.”
Ok, if someone had been with me that would have been funny. Why is it I could only come up with good lines when no one else was around to hear me?
Finally, the mall was in sight. Sanctuary… I hope.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
End Chapter 09
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