Patsy Power Part 3

So that was what we did. The ladies were very gracious and took us to a few very good clothing stores and quickly got into the groove of our trying on and selecting; finally, we had a number of bags which our hosts put in a cab to be taken to the Hotel and then took us to a lovely little Italian Restaurant which reminded us of Marios.

The food was good and we were regaled with tales of life in the big apple. The ladies said that we should leave the restaurant early as there was karaoke on tonight and it could get a bit rowdy. We laughed and told them that if we were still in Nashville tonight we would be doing an acoustic set prior to a karaoke competition and that we expected it to be no different here.

One of them said “If I got you on first, would you do a number here?” We agreed and she went off to see the manager. The other looked at us and said “You girls are a breath of fresh air. Not only have you called out the head of marketing today; you have told the general manager what to do; you have junked ten thousand dollars’ worth of product and still remained cheerful and entirely engaging with a couple old fogies like us. I have enjoyed this afternoon and evening very much, it is a relief to be with a group of girls with no pretences or airs and graces. You should meet some of the prima donnas that we have to smile at. What-ever happens tomorrow, I thank you on behalf of both of us for a very pleasant break from reality.” The other one came back and said “You are on in five minutes; I am afraid that the karaoke machine has mainly new pop and rap but I know that there are a few old GirlGroup numbers. However, we do supply this restaurant group with some new music and I do believe there may well be a couple of your songs on it by now.” She said that with a wicked grin on her face and I knew that we were about to make their day.

Five minutes later the restaurant manager got up on the small stage and announced the start of the karaoke competition. He said that the artist who got the most calls for more would be the winner and then said that first up there was five girls from out of town who wanted to show New York how the boondocks did it. There were much catcalling and half-hearted cheers when we got up on stage and took the proffered microphones. We looked at the machine and there was, indeed, the ‘Mall Song’. I expected that they never thought that anyone would pick it but I pointed it out to the girls who all nodded with evil grins on their faces so I hit the go button and, as we started singing it, a hush came over the room.

After the first chorus line I started to get the audience to join in. It was the full band version so, when the guys verses came on, we dropped our tones and sang all of the guys parts as well. By the time we got to the final chorus we had all of the audience singing along. When the song ended we made to leave the stage but the manager called us back saying that we would not be getting away with it that easily. The crowd was calling for more so I found a Supremes number that we did with no difficulty. As the crowd was still calling for more and the manager was not letting us leave the stage I had a look at the song list and saw one of ‘Amazons’ hits. I spoke to Nina to see if she could do it and she nodded so I spoke to the audience. “I am afraid that we have played a little trick on you all tonight. We are the female half of Patsy and the Innocent Party and we are in town for an album launch tomorrow. “

“That album does, indeed, contain the first song we sang tonight. The final song we have chosen is a hit by ‘Amazon’. We have chosen it because Nina here is a great fan of theirs and we will be touring with them over the summer with the final concert being here, in New York. We thank you for your applause tonight but I must tell you that you will have to choose the winner from the following competitors as we will not consider ourselves in the running. Thank you.” I hit the go button on the ‘Amazon’ number and Nina sang it like she was Ashley’s doppelganger. It was creepy to listen to and the crowd fully appreciated it as ‘Amazon’ was a local band and very popular there. Back at the table our companions were open mouthed.

They took us back to the hotel and thanked us for the experience and gave us both their cards, telling us that no matter what the time was they would be happy to hear from us. They bade us good luck for Saturday and we went up to our rooms for an early night. Before I went to bed I rang Sarah and brought her up to date with the events here. I told her that I would ring after the Launch.

Saturday morning we were all up and breakfasting in the dining room when we were pointed out to a tall, and casually dressed, good looking guy who came over and introduced himself as Simon Longford. I introduced our group and invited him to sit down. I offered him a cup of coffee and as he sipped it he looked around at us and said “My staff were very impressed with how grounded you girls are. It is a miracle to find five of you with good voices and such good sense. I can assure you that we have, not fifty, but a hundred of your albums for the launch today and I have just been up to the room where it is to be held and demanded that the signs outside, and a banner behind the stage, be removed as not being the correct name. Since this came to light I have been told about other new bands who had to endure the actions of our, now previous, marketing manager. I was not aware of this and am here to apologise on behalf of my company. I can tell you that I, myself, will conduct the launch today and that alone will catch the attention of the media. Last night I listened to your album and watched the dance club video and I have to say that if we had lost you over this my shareholders would have had my head. My ladies who put out spot fires for me have spoken to me this morning and told me that you not only won over a karaoke crowd, but managed to also plug your album and upcoming tour and they were most impressed by your stage presence. They also told me that none of you drink alcohol but you all like to shop.” He smiled at this and we smiled along with him. I was beginning to warm to his candour. “Do you have anything you want to do this morning as the launch starts with a buffet lunch so you have a few hours to spare?”

Joanne said that she would really like to see Coney Island and we all said that this would be good. He said, “So be it, let’s go and have a bit of fun, I think that I need it myself.” We went up to our rooms and got ready for the outing and when we all got down to the foyer he led us outside to a massive limo and we were off to Coney Island. We spent a laughter filled morning riding some of the rides and especially the Ferris wheel and I even won a kewpie doll at the shooting range. We were feeling very relaxed when we got back to the hotel to be made-up and dressed for the launch. We were led to the room where the launch was taking place and entered to another smattering of applause and Simon stepped up to the microphone and said “Ladies and gentlemen (and members of the press) I am pleased to welcome our guests of honour – Patsy Meyers, Joanne Swift, Lorraine Masters, Nina Parker and Minh Ji Lu – the female members of the new sensation ‘Patsy and the Innocent Party. Today we are here to not only launch their debut album but to launch their stellar careers. I have listened to the album and also watched their dance club video and I can say that we will hear a lot more of these lovely ladies and their backing band in the future. Before the official launch I ask that you partake of the delightful buffet lunch provided and we will attend to the official stuff later. I must say that I looked at the running sheet for the launch and tore it up as the world does not need more pompous speeches. Enjoy.”

We stood around as the usual questions were answered and the lady who asked me how I found New York yesterday came up to me and apologised for such a stupid remark and said that paraphrasing her previous question she now wanted to know what I thought of New York. I answered as truthfully as I could, based on my experiences since that time, and we chatted quite amicably. After a decent period of chatting and eating, Simon stepped up to the microphone again.

Part 4

“Ladies and Gentlemen” he started “I am Simon Longford, the general manager of the music division. I am here today through an unfortunate but serendipitous situation which brought these young ladies to my close attention. I normally do not get involved with an Album Launch of a new band but, having met these ladies and listened to their material, I am happy for the future history writers to associate me with this auspicious event. We have, in our midst, the vocal section of a remarkable band called “Patsy and the Innocent Party’ which is made up of the five you see today who are backed by four of the most experienced musicians that Nashville has nurtured. On the table behind me are copies of their debut, self-titled, album for you to take and critique at your leisure. I am pleased to launch this album and, on the big screen here, I will show you some clips from a recent concert in Nashville which demonstrates what a powerhouse this band is. The clips are raw, one camera, footage and will be part of the next DVD we will distribute later in the year. I will allow the video to run for a while and after that I will ask for Patsy to say a few words.”

So saying he stepped from the stage while the screen started showing clips from the first half of the show. The press quickly hurried to the table and snaffled their CDs before standing around with drinks in their hands watching us perform. The video clips were just ‘Mall Song’, ‘Wait’ and ‘Changing’ and when they had finished he asked me up to the stage. I said thank you for coming and the usual friendly stuff, introducing each of the other girls. I then said, “I was told that we were to perform this afternoon with acoustic versions of our songs. However, although you would be polite enough to listen, I think that when you listen to our album you will hear everything you want to know about us in the pop guise.”

“Some of you may have seen our ‘Live at The Place’ DVD but for those who have not I need to explain that we are a band with a split personality. There are only two and a half of us at present but we do feel more emerging.” There was laughter at that. “The CDs that you take away are our pop guise and it is the one that will open the ‘Amazon’ tour in late May and run through thirteen cities before ending here, in New York some three months later. However, in the same period we will be performing at seven dance festivals which also finish here in New York a week after the last ‘Amazon’ concert. For those appearances we have recruited a completely different backing band of younger guys who can take the pressure of those festivals and will be using our current backing band for the ‘Amazon’ tour. I happen to have a DVD in my purse of what those performances will be like if anyone is interested.”

There was a combined cry of “Yes” so I got the DVD and gave it to the chap in charge of the screen and asked him to play the first and the last two tracks at a high volume when I gave him the nod. I got back up on stage and said “The girls and I are extremely fortunate in having Alice Walker as a boss and mentor. She was known as M’Aleese in her singing days and trialled a song called ‘Bounce’ at a local dance club, or disco as it was then. That evening increased the population of our local hospital by about twenty overjealous dancers and the tune was confined to that single outing. We have revived it as the opening song of our dance set in a more modern version and I give to you now ‘Patsy and the innocent Party’ in a not so innocent but surely ‘Party Mode’.”

I nodded to the chap who started the video at the required volume, much to the stunned members of the press who had come to a genteel pop launch. When the dramatic end of ‘Maximum Dance’ faded, Simon came to my side and said “You certainly know how to shock, girl.” Before going back up onto the stage and said “Ladies and Gentlemen, this, I think, draws the Album Launch to an end with a bang. I am sure you all realise that you will be called back here; in the not too distant future, to attend the launch of a live dance album that even I did not know we were going to distribute until five minutes ago. I thank you for your attendance and I am sure the ladies will answer all of those new questions that I am sure having sprung into your heads. There will be more drinks if you want but remember not to drive home. Thank you for coming and an especial thank you to our five talented guests.”

He stepped off of the stage to be surrounded by the press wanting to know what plans were in place for our future while the others either clustered round us or around the drinks bar. My ever present journalist came up to me and said “I am now going to have to revise my two earlier questions. It is not so much of what you think of New York but more of what New York is going to think about you!” She then told me that she would be at the ‘Amazon’ opening and also try to get to Washington for the festival but would need to convince her boss to give her the budget. “I think I would like to follow you and, maybe get a book out of it.” She gave me her card and I looked at it and said “Thank you, June; I look forward to seeing you. If you want extra access, just call Mae Ellen at K Beat and she will look after you.”

We answered lots of questions as much as we could and, finally, the media was reluctantly made to put down their glasses and leave, with just us, Simon and a few staffers, in the room. Simon clapped his hands and said “OK Gang, how did that go?” One of the staffers grinned and said “Not as it was planned but with ten times more impact.” There were a few other positive comments and one of them remarked that if it wasn’t for me yesterday they would have been stuck with couple of boring speeches from the marketing division and would have missed seeing the fun they had witnessed. Simon said “On that matter, next week I want each of you to put on my desk a resume and the reason you think you can run the marketing better. I refuse to promote all of those ‘yes men’ the previous incumbent had appointed and expect a fresh approach in future.” The staffers all looked stunned and then all smiled, looking at each other and immediately evaluating their own chances of being the boss. Simon then said, “Seeing that we are all finished here I do have to tell you that the little soiree that had been planned for tonight has been cancelled. However, as I have been told that these lovely ladies like a good meal, I have booked a large table at a certain restaurant these ladies have been to already and I invite all of you to have a quiet dinner with me and my two right-hand ladies.”

So it was that the five of us, our two companions from Friday, Simon and four staffers (amazed at having a dinner with the general manager) entered the Italian Restaurant like an invading army. The manager came up to us and welcomed us all and especially the five lovely songbirds and he asked us if we would do a few songs for his Saturday crowd. We said we would and we were all ushered to a big table in the middle of the room. We ordered drinks and looked at the menu and chatted. Our meal orders were taken and Simon raised his glass and proposed a toast to all the others at the table who “Had saved the company from a terrible mistake through quick thinking and dedication to the company”.

Of course, everyone was now feeling quite at home with each other and I could see Simon evaluating his staffers in light of their possible futures. It looked, to me, that he was going to have to make a difficult decision next week. We ate our meals and then the manager came over and asked us girls if we were ready and when we said we were he went up onto the small stage and called for attention. “Ladies and Gentlemen” He announced “Last night we expected to suffer through the usual karaoke ordeal but I was coerced into allowing five girls from out of town the chance to sing for that very combative crowd. Tonight the five are with us again and have agreed to sing a few songs to our karaoke machine. I ask that you not leave now because you do not like karaoke but to remain seated to enjoy a sensation that you will have to pay good money to hear in the future. I give you ‘Patsy and the Innocent Party’ “

Marianne G 2020