*Before…

XY, XY, XY… so maybe all of this is a good thing?
She surfaced and sat there for a little longer before getting out and drying off and taking a good long look at herself.
There was a lot of her there that XX Emily didn’t like about herself.
Short and not so curvy and nothing like even her little sister who was a total clone of their mom.
There was a lot to be insecure about from the XX point of view especially when you get raised around other women and girls where looks had a standard and looks meant stuff.
She turned here and there and went from side to side.
She was a girl….everything in the right places just not as much and just not as popular stuff either.
But looking at it from the whole XY place now.
That…all of it.
Well it wasn’t so bad actually.
She even pulled her hair back, looked and checked she headed back into her bedroom and slipped into bed.
She really needed to think about this some more.
A lot more.
But maybe, maybe she was more than either of those two little letters.
The thoughts felt like progress.
And she went to bed smiling.

*And Now…

It’d been a long time since Emily had woken up smiling and just thinking about what happened in the tub made her blush.

Last night though even with the parental supervision had been amazing and it really wasn’t going away either.

There was a lot of things going on that should have made her feel worse but last night, the “date” the dance and other things.

It wasn’t like that with Jack or the other guys she’d dated.

This felt light.

And she guessed that was the big difference why the morning felt better.

She looked at the clock and sighed and climbed into the shower and got ready for school opting for some cute leggings that looked like a white knit print and a mini skirt and went for a change with the push up bra her mother bought for her to “help” with her chest issues. She kinda wanted the extra help today.

Well honestly she wanted the help for Kira.

That was the thing she decided to go with today, femme it up and be as pretty as she could.

Which sort of felt good too, she hadn’t felt like her old self since she found out about the whole CAIS thing. She went with a pick scoop neck that went with the bra and showed it off a little which was what she was hoping for.

There was a fine line with school faculty sometimes.

The same went for her make-up there was a certain amount that was okay otherwise you got punished or were just one of the outcast kids like the Emo kids or the Goth kids who got bullied for being different.

Still today she was going “girlie” something her mom would likely be thrilled about but it wasn’t to please her mother.

Emily checked everything twice over opting out on the lipstick until after breakfast.

Satisfied she took her hormones and her vitamins and headed upstairs grabbing her book bag and her lacrosse jacket and workout clothes as she went.

Angie was already up and was in a heated debate with their mom over her detention.

“You’re young Angie you should have just let it slide.”

“Mom, she’s an old bigot why should I let it slide?”

“People will remember why you did that and this isn’t the kind of town where all that misguided liberal stuff flies.”

“Misguided Liberal stuff? Mom she was preaching at us.”

“And you should just let it go. People talk Angela.”

“Well if they can talk then they can learn something right?”

Emily looked at her mom and her mom just looked frustrated and a mix of sad and mad both.

Their mom said. “People judge, and that follows you.”

Angie rolled her eyes. “Well if that follows me they can kiss my ass.”

“Angie!”

Emily tried not to laugh.

Then again it was Angie who was as headstrong as she was pretty and popular.

“What?”

“People will talk, people will hold that against you here and that’ll make finding a guy and a job a hell of a lot harder.”

Angie looked at their mother. “You sound like I’m going to stay here in town.”

“You’re not?”

“Hell no.”

Emily’s mom nodded as she surprised both of them. “Good.”

Emily asked. “Good?”

“Good, I want neither of you two stuck here like me. I was stuck here because I made a lot of wrong choices. I love you both but there’s not a lot of future or freedom in a little podung town like this.”

Emily looked at her. “Mom you did alright.”

Angie added in with. “Yeah Mom you did okay.”

She looked at the both. “I married your dad, I got lucky. There’s a whole lot of girls in town just like I was or worse off that are stuck here. I want, I really want better for both of you than any of that.”

Emily looked her mom in the eyes and she was really serious.

She knew that getting pregnant with her threw all of her plans off when her bio-dad or donor took off.

She hugged her and her mom pulled a frowny face. “Get ready for school both of you.”

Emily nodded. “Yes Mom.”

“Emily…”

“Yes Mom?”

“You look nice today.”

“Thanks mom I’m trying to get me feet back under me.”

“Good, just because you have a girlfriend and that you’re on the lacrosse team not does that mean that you have to fit some weird lesbian mold or something.”

Emily blushed. “Mom!”

Angie cackled.

Emily gave her the finger.

Angie laughed at her. “Keep you finger boner to yourself.”

Their mom yelled “Angie!”

Angie cackled again.

Emily blushed and grabbed some cereal and pop tarts and drank a quick cup of coffee as her mother frowned about her drinking it.

“You’re too young for coffee.”

“Coffee is of the good, coffee keeps people alive.”

Her mother was going to say something when their dad came in. “They both get that from you.”

And he got a punch in the shoulder from her mom. “Don’t take their side.”

“Ow, I’m not, but they take after their mother in a whole lot of ways. And some of them are very good ways.”

He kissed her around her grumbles and he passed both the girls a twenty for lunch money.

Angie squealed.

Emily tucked her’s away. “Thank you I might by my girlfriend lunch.”

“That’s the point, some good to offset the bad.”

Their mom stared at him then them and then him. “They’re going to earn that, twenty dollars for lunch is too much.”

“Yes they will I’ll have lots of chores for them to do down at the strip.”

“We have new clients?”

“We do and I’m going to be busy with them and being in and out of the lakes for most of the week.”

“Lunches?”

“They paid for full service so yep.”

She smiled. “Well that’s good news, I’ll get started on things as soon as the girls get ready.”

Emily shoveled her food down and washed it down with coffee and went to go and brush her teeth.

Angie joined her and they touched up their make-up and added lipstick and went to go and wait for the bus.

It was a little early so it made for a bit of a longer wait and Emily smiled when she seen it pull up and she got on. There were some looks from some of the other kids there and she looked for Kira who was in her usual spot smiling at her and she went and joined her.

Kira looked really good.

That lick you lips sort of good-nerves kind of hot.

Her hair was down in that sort of California easy tumble that she managed so well and she was wearing a nice pendant necklace and these really expensive and definitely city looking earrings. The kind that well looked like real gold and then there were the ones with the stones in them that looked real too.

Kira was one of the few non Emo-Goths with multiple piercings and hey all looked great on her.

Just like the really thin black sweater or like long sleeved tee shirt she had on that hugged her like a second skin while showing nothing but still somehow made her boobs look amazing and huge.

Bangles and bracelets and rings on her wrists that looked really good with her dusky grey-blue suede jacket that she was wearing and real denim jeans and not the Walmart stretch jeans and killer boots.

She sat with her and she smiled at her and they kissed.

People stared, and stared hard.

Right there on the bus with girlfriend on girlfriend lipstick on lipstick kissing.

They did that until the bus driver coughed over and over again.

“Girls, the school board still owns the buses. Calm it down okay.”

Emily grinned and Kira said. “Sorry, sir Emily’s just too cute, you know how it is.”

There was some laughs and some giggles and there were some more stares as this wasn’t something that kids did around here or at least not in public.

Emily blushed. “Too cute?”

Kira smiled. “Definitely, right in that whole literally could not help myself. You look amazing today.”

“Thank you and you look amazing as usual.”

“Old habits die hard plus I don’t want them to have the satisfaction.”

Emily smiled and slid her hand in with Kira’s. “That’s exactly what I was thinking.”

“Really, so we’re going to war today?”

“Well I wasn’t planning on it, but I’m not going to just take it. My mom took people’s shit when she was pregnant with me and after. I’m not letting them walk over me.”

Kira looked into her eyes with this excited light. “You look really, really cute when you’re determined.”

“Good I want to be on my girlfriend’s mind all day.”

Kira smiled. “Well that’s already accomplished, you were on my mind already.”

They got really close to kissing again.

Angie threw a wad of paper at them. “Hey you two heard the busdriver, do I need to get a hose.”

Kira laughed and Emily just sort of stared grinning just a little as she pictured her in that tight black top and it and Kira soaking wet.

Kira leaned in close. “What has you looking like that?”

“I kinda want to really have a hose right now.”

Kira grinned and whispered to her. “Well with your condition you’re out of luck and trust me it’s over rated.”

Emily burst out laughing at the self punning joke Kira made getting looks as they pulled into the school.

Everybody stopped talking as The Sheriff was there and were hauling Doug price off with him swearing.

“Dykes, you let these dykes in and doing whatever you want and we’ll have the faggots here next! We’ll have the trannies in here and then...then you’ll have people with animals!”

He broke free and ran away or tried to until one of the deputies took him down with a football tackle.

It was quiet on the bus.

So quiet.

Until Kira quipped. “Well that is going to leave a mark.”

Which started some nervous snickers.

The bus driver waited until the police had him in the back of the car before opening the doors and the kids poured out looking to hook up with friends to find out what had happened and what had been going on.

The driver looked at Emily and Kira as they were getting off.

“Just be careful you too.”

Emily nodded and determined she took Kira’s hand as they got off the bus together to stares.

They headed to the bus entrance and they were met and actually cover blocked by the guys on the team. Alex was grinning and passed them coffees from Caribou Coffee and he had a thing of fritters in a box too.

Kira took hers and a pastry. “Mmmm...chocolate hazelnut…”

The guys were watching her eat.

Emily was watching her eat.

She gave them all a mischievous hot girl squint smile with her mouth sexy full before taking a drink of her coffee.

Emily coughed pointedly. “Uhm guys hello, she’s taken.”

Alex looked at her the Emily then at Kira. “Seriously! Right on! We have our first official out couple in school history!”

Emily blushed. “Well yeah okay...what happened?”

Craig spoke up. “Dougie decided to try to take a baseball bat to Mrs. Connors car with her in it calling her a fag lover and a prairie nigger.”

Emily glared at where they drove off with him.

Lee added in. “With her in her car.”

Kira swore. “Shit, is he psycho?”

Matt nodded. “Pretty much, he was looking for you two before that.”

Emily stopped.

Matt looked at her. “We told him that we’d kill him if anything happened to the two of you.”

Kira stopped and looked at them. “Why? I mean amazingly, hugely thank you guys but why?”

Craig stopped and rested on his crutches. “We’re not all redneck assholes here, and Alex is gay and has been in the closet well until he just came out and you girls were here for that. We’re a team, we’re friends.”

Emily swallowed a lump in her throat. “Guys, thank you that’s amazing.”

Lee grinned. “Well I at least had an alterior motif. If you and Kira are alright and you’re on the team well then maybe I’ll get to watch you and kira making out.”

He stopped and looked at both of them back and forth a few times. “Seriously, could I watch?”

Everyone laughed because he was clearly just being a goof and laughed again when Matt and Craig both paintbrushed him in back of the head at the same time.

They laughed a little bit more as they just ate the fritters and turnovers just heading in and hanging around the lockers and having fun until the first bell rang.

Emily smiled as she headed to class.

All this bigoted stuff was likely far from over but for the first time she had friends at her back and she was pretty sure actually meant it unlike some of her old friends that left her in the dust as they developed faster than her.

Friends and a girlfriend.

She could handle this.