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For Old Time's Sake
If Sharron has completed her journey, then I see no problem with her joining, but if she still has any unsorted bits, it could cause problems. It will be interesting to see her get revenge upon her tormentors, and maybe she can get help from a few friends there.
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
Interesting...
... Sorry that she wants revenge. Though, she may have been harassed more than others.
She isn't the first TG person to go through OTC. She won't be the last. I've known quite a few non-TG people that have been through a wide variety of OTC units / schools. Based on the stories I heard and what I saw myself, kids with issues were not abused. They might have been ignored by some.
The only exception to this I'm aware of was the really large schools/units (several hundred cadets) or the academies where in the past cadets would have experienced a LOT of hazing, and kids that reacted more to the hazing, would have drawn more than their share. (For some reason those that haze seem to thrive on getting reactions.)
What does this have to do with the price of beans? Not much. I guess. Maybe I'll end up erasing this bit of my comment after I think about it more.
As to the story start...
Interesting concept. There are a few complexities I'm curious how you'll end up resolving.
1) Service ID #/ National ID. If Andrew was in the unit a few years previously, Sharron is likely to have the same # which would cause a flag to be raised.
2) Knowing too much - Sharron's been through things fairly recently. Pretending she doesn't know much is likely to fail. And only so much can be passed off to stories from her brother. Add that to the fact she's trying to keep her "brother's" existance quiet.
3) How much of the perceived "hazing" was Andrew's heightened sensitivity and how much actual persecution? I'd expect both were involved.
4) How different ARE the personalities? Interests? etc...
The start certainly has potential, even though it's short. I'll be curious to see what you do with this.
Annette
Too Negative
I find the premise for the story continuation too negative. If revenge is the only motive, that's only going to take away from sympathy for the character.
She was in, she's out, she's living her life, she never liked it while she was there, why go back? Why does she need revenge?
Besides, as a lower-order member of a military organization, how could she get revenge in any meaningful way without committing a criminal act, or getting tossed out, or experiencing twice as much strife as she causes others?
You're clearly free to write whatever you want, but I don't see this particular idea as having near as much potential as your other ones.
well
social revenge is sometimes more painful....
and you would be suprised what people can get away with in that organisation... its insanely informal...
Yes its negative, but initial motives dont hold always do they?
motives evolve, plans never survive intiial contact, keeping in genre....
Alyssa
You wouldn't, would you?
Don't tell me she plots to publically embarass one who did the bullying or condoned/covered it up and falls in love and by their mutual falling in love gets an even better revenge?
Who can torment a man better than his *loyal* wife. Or maybe revenge will fall by the wayside as she *finds herself* and ends up stronger for it. Revenege just for revenge's sake is a waste and self distructive but the line between love and hate is a narrow one. She could marry, thus deneying her love/hate interst children but over time would regret that and bemoan the fact she is baren. She seems to happy as a woman, why ruin that by revenge, better to live life to it's fullest.
Maybe turn a few revenge/love conventions on their respective heads with this. Maybe the comanding officer was once a man and had battlefield injures making her eventually choose to become a woman, That would be farfetched but wild. Maybe her worst tormrntor tormented him because subcosicously he saw the woman in him/her. He beat her to avoid confronting what he thought was a homosexual attraction.
There is always the young woman recrute helps them win a big award or saves the day, rescues a child from a fire and then revealals herself as TG jsut tospite the OTC after the heap prasise oon her as "The epitomy of British womanhood/miltary officer," or so on.
Have fun.
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
?
looking thru the comments then reading the start of the tale, makes me wonder if you deleted whole sections of this story. As it stands its very open to go any direction, but i guess the title is...
wonder if you plan to continue this
I found this tonight on random solos, and found the start interesting. I wonder if you plan to continue ....