Clips: A Collection of Vignettes

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Clips
by Ellen Hayes
Copyright© 2000, 2017 Ellen Hayes
All Rights Reserved.


 
Legalities: Clips -*- Copyright 2000 by Ellen Hayes .

Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when used for satirical purposes.

This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and possibly sex. If you are legally not allowed to read materials containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading this. I am not responsible.

Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish, state, and country.

All rights reserved. See the bottom for distribution rights. ~Ellen.

Author Note: This is a collection of vignettes that came to mind over a period of two years. It's not necessarily the way the real world works, but it's the way I imagine, and wish and hope, the world works. Or, sometimes, the way the world IS. They deal with lots of different things, but no incest or non-consensual sex; I'm a romantic, not a rapist. =)

Not only are all the characters in here completely fictional, they aren't even related in any way to any other fictional characters either!

And, if they inspire you, feel free to use the names and even the bit of text verbatim in a story of your own, IF and ONLY IF you send me a copy of the completed work when you're ready for publication, posting, or archiving, and if you mention where you got the idea and who wrote the original - me.

Mixing and matching clips in the same story might cause brain damage, though... - ---Ellen Hayes.
 
Image Credit:  Picture purchased and licensed for publishing from 123rf.com ~Sephrena.

 


 

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Clips

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+++

     "You were having some kind of wild sex, weren't you?" Trish's
mother accused her.
     "MOM!"
     The familiar laughter filled the phone for several moments, as
Trish felt a furious blush spread across her face. *God, I hate this,*
she simmered, but Mom had the money they needed suddenly, and-
     "And it was something to do with that bondage stuff you were
interested in," Mom stated, as if she already knew.
     "Yes," Trish forced out.
     There was silence on both ends of the phone line for quite a while.
     Mom finally spoke. "You're not going to get a dime until you tell
me what happened, you know."
     Trish took a deep breath. "Alright, it went FINE, okay? And John
loved it, and I loved it, so it all worked out, alright? So don't
even-"
     "If it went so perfectly, you wouldn't be calling me for money."
     "I know!" Trish forced control of herself. "What happened was,
we'd used ropes, and when John went to untie me, afterwards, he couldn't
get the knots undone."
     Mom chortled. "I thought he was a sailor."
     "MOM! They don't use damned sailing ships in the Navy any more!"
     "Don't curse at your mother," was her calm reply. "So, he couldn't
get the knots undone. So?"
     Trish took another breath. "So, he got the scissors out, and he
was going to cut them off, and then the dogs couldn't stand it any more
and slammed into the door, and jumped on him! And he was behind me,
across the corner of the bed, and so he dropped the scissors and they
went straight into the waterbed mattress. Then Sam," their retarded
English sheepdog whom Trish was still thinking of sending to the pound,
"Sam jumped up ON John, and pushed him over and he sat on the handle end
of the scissors. And it cut a five inch gash in the mattress, and it
just exploded water. All over the floor and everything..."
     There was a loud thump in Trish's ear, and then howling laughter
from the other end of the phone. *I hate her,* Trish seethed.

+++

     Lester Davis, known as 'officer' when someone was attempting to
kiss his ass, and worse things when the ass-kissing didn't work,
finished writing the ticket. "Now look, I know how it is for you kids,"
he lectured the two teenaged males. "But if I ever catch you, either of
you, doing something in a moving car with the driver, you're all gonna
go to jail for reckless endangerment, got it?" They nodded. "Now, get
out of here and go find someplace SAFE to park before you start sucking
face and, other things." The boys didn't know whether to laugh or not.

+++

     Tom turned to Steve as they were packing up the camera and sound
gear. "Now, the question is, would we get more money by selling it
outright, or by offering the sorority the first bid on all the media?"
     Steve shook his head. "We gotta give them the chance to pay up
before we dump it nationally." He grinned. "And I'm sure at least half
of them wouldn't want it known what they were doing."

+++

     "This is my dad, Chris," Rachel announced, and Dan shook hands with
him. "And this is his husband Ron." Dan shook hands with him, too, but
his own hand had suddenly gone damp.
     Right in line with his worst fear, Rachel announced - happily, too,
damn her - "I'm almost ready, so you all talk while I finish getting
ready, okay?"
     He hated - absolutely loathed - meeting girl's fathers. And now
the girl he'd had the hots for since the first day of freshman year, had
to have TWO of them.

+++

     "Hey, Bill," Ted said as he walked up to the coffee bar.
     "Hey, how ya doin'?" Bill grinned.
     Ted looked at Bill, and a slow smile spread across his face. "She
got it for you?"
     Bill, his teeth showing now in a very happy face indeed, pulled the
collar of his shirt wide open, until Ted could see the black lace strap
running vertically under his shirt. "Yesterday."
     "Oh, you dog!" Ted laughed, and clapped Bill on the shoulder.
"Man, she always gets you the nice stuff, doesn't she?"
     Bill nodded happily. "So how're the projections looking?" he
asked, shifting the talk back to business.

+++

     "That's the garage door," Michael mentioned in a flat, hopeless
voice.
     "Shut up and help!" Victoria hissed at him. "Try sliding your hand
through now-" She held her breath as she worked on the other hand, and
almost screamed with joy when the hand slipped out of the rope. "Jesus,
Jesus, try the other-" That one slipped out too.
     They were breathless with fear and hope and anticipation and terror
all rolled up into one as Victoria stuffed the ropes back behind the
couch and they scrambled for Michael's bedroom, seconds before his
parents came into the living room.

+++

     Billy sat up in bed, and rubbed his eyes. He was thirsty, and had
to go peepee too.
     He climbed down, out of his big-boy bed, and took his teddy with
him to the bathroom. When he finished, he forgot to flush, as he often
did, and instead turned around and stumbled sleepily off towards the
stairs.
     He wondered why the lights were all on as he held up his hand to
cover his eyes. Mommy and Daddy were usually asleep when he got up to
go peepee in the middle of the night. But Mommy was on a trip, he
remembered. Maybe she was coming home now?
     Billy pushed open the door to the kitchen, and stared at his daddy,
who dropped a full wineglass on the linoleum floor. The crash woke
Billy up. "Uh oh," he said, and pointed, "Mommy's gonna be mad, you
spilled drink on her new shoes..."

+++

     Janice sat on the couch next to her husband. Of all the business
parties she had ever been to, this had to be the worst-
     "Am I the ONLY guy here?" Damen said in a wounded tone.
     Janice sighed deeply. "Honey, I swear, I didn't know they were ALL
lesbians. I thought there would be a FEW other guys here..."
     "But it's okay," Susan her boss said as she sat on the other side
of Damen, flashing a winning smile. "Not all of us are prejudiced."

+++

     Steven screamed, "Mom! Sheila's been in my stuff again-"
     "You always buy HIM the nicest-" Sheila shrieked back.
     "CHILDREN!" Karen yelled, out-shouting both of them at the same
time. They shut up, momentarily. "Sheila, Steven is older than you, he
gets to wear older dresses than you. Steven, it would be nice if you
could let your sister BORROW some of your nice things, IF she asks
first," she emphasized.
     "Yeah," added Sheila, who couldn't ever leave well enough alone.
     Steven glared at his younger sister, then turned to his mom with a
pleading glance. "Mom, if I let her borrow something, can we play with
your makeup? Please?" Sheila added to the pleas.
     Karen sighed. "Alright, but you have to clean UP AFTER
YOURSELVES!" she yelled after their racing forms. "I wouldn't mind so
much," she mentioned to herself as she turned back to chopping onions,
"if they wouldn't always end up looking like prostitutes." She smiled
to herself, then, remembering HER first experiments with makeup. She
really couldn't blame them.

+++

     Mark, at the moment going by Marcia, was more than a little
surprised. For one thing, he'd never expected to meet someone from his
outside life here at a crossdresser's convention, well over a thousand
miles away. And especially not the CEO of his company, for whom he had
just delivered a special presentation the day before. Mister Todson, or
Ms as the case might be, looked quite stunning in a Chanel suit. And
quite stunned. Obviously, he recognized Marcia too.
     In for a penny, he thought, and stuck out his hand. "Hello! It's
so nice to see you here," he smiled. "That's a lovely suit...."

+++

     Anna surveyed the wreckage, and took one deep breath, and let it
out slowly. Then she screamed, "ROBERT ANTHONY! Come here this
INSTANT!"
     Her son finally appeared at the top of the stairs. "Mom, I-"
     "Robert," she said in short clipped syllables, "I have told you
time and time again, if you play in here, that you MUST clean up
properly afterwards. Do you remember what I said last time this
happened?" She swept her hand over the bondage gear lying tangled up
and piled on the floor.
     "But Mom-"
     "Don't 'But Mom' me, young man! I told you that if this happened
again, that you would be grounded for a week-"
     "Mom!" He sounded truly anguished now.
     "-and furthermore," she continued without stopping, "that you
wouldn't be allowed to play in here for a month."
     "Mom, Sandy and I had a date this weekend!" he whined, as if that
made any difference to her.
     "Then perhaps you should have thought of that before you left
everything in such a mess! Robert," she said in a more reasonable tone
of voice, "I have three clients coming in tomorrow, and I need all of
my equipment cleaned and ready when they get here. You know that."
     "Mom, please, I'll clean it up, just don't-"
     "Robert, you knew what would happen, and you chose to ignore it.
Now, you will clean this up properly, and then I would suggest you call
Sandy and tell her that you have been grounded this weekend."
     Robert clodded down the stairs, no longer arguing, but the picture
of ultimate teenage dejection. Anna stopped him with a hand on his
chest. "Robert, I'm sorry, but if you play with adult toys, you have to
have an adult's responsibility."

+++

     Stan looked at his wife, who was looking at him, and then looked at
his neighbor Shirley, whose hair he recognized. She probably would
have looked at him too, except she was blindfolded, as well as tied in a
standing spread-eagled position at the foot of his bed. And completely
nude.
     He looked back at his wife, who stood there dumbly with a leather
strap in her hand.
     "Er," he said eventually, "I don't suppose you cooked tonight?"

+++

     "I'm telling you, she's a guy!" Bob excitedly told Sherry. "I saw
her bend over, and it was like bulging in her underwear!"
     "She's not a guy," insisted Sherry.
     "I KNOW what I saw, and I saw-"
     "I don't care what you saw, she's not a guy, okay? I have gym with
her, and I know, okay?"
     "So what did I see?" he challenged.
     She shrugged, and picked some lint off her sweater. "She's never
been very good at tucking in. Probably her dick."
     He stopped walking for a second, then shouted, "Her WHAT! SEE, I
TOLD you-"
     She stopped too, and turned to him. "Look, if she's a guy, I'm a
guy, okay? I don't see what the big deal is, alright?"
     After a long moment, Bob said weakly, "What?"

+++

     Adam started to sit down, then thought better of it right as his
rear end hit the chair. As he stood back up, his roommate chuckled.
     "What did I tell you?" Juan smirked. "You've gotta stretch
yourself before you can handle something that big."
     "Oh, like you know," Adam retorted. Juan was so het, he had two or
three girlfriends at once. Adam didn't know how he found the time to
study.
     "I do know," he said with authority. "I thought I was gay, back in
high school, so I know."
     Adam looked at him skeptically. Juan just held out his hands,
saying wordlessly, 'You can believe me or not, but I'm just trying to
help you.'
     "So...." Adam left it open.
     "So, if you want some help, just ask, is all I'm saying."
     "Welllll... like what?"
     Juan stood up. "You need to do stretching exercises, like a
runner? You know? Let me show you what I used to do." With that, he
put his back to Adam and dropped his pants. Then his underwear.

+++

     Trembling, Betsy unlocked the door with shaky hands, as Ken pulled
the garage door shut. She stumbled in, almost immediately followed by
her husband. He grabbed her arms as she deleriously spun around.
     "We are all alone," he whispered to her.
     She gasped, "And the children-"
     "Our dear, sweet children-"
     "Will be gone for a whole, entire month?" she whispered.
     They stared into each other's eyes for a long moment.
     Then Ken kissed her passionately, and that was all she wrote for
Betsy's self-restraint. They had planned to have a nice, romantic
interlude that first night, with a sensual bath, sexy clothes, and the
works, but all thought of that fled from their minds at the idea of
simply being able to screw on the kitchen floor without being
interrupted.

+++

     "You are not going to tie me up to a tree and that's final!" Beth
was almost literally stomping the ground with her size-five hiking
boots.
     "Well, wh..." Johnny was desperate. "What about on the ground
cloth, with stakes-"
     "NOOOO!" she shrieked at him. "NO NO NO NO! Enn Oohh!"
     "But, but," he ran his fingers through his hair and looked around,
almost panicked by this time.
     "What has gotten into you?!" she demanded.
     He stared at her, a picture of a desperate man, until he slumped.
Beth almost felt bad when he did that; it was like he'd completely
deflated.
     "You, remember when you said, you wanted to make it with, with a
football team?" he asked her quietly.
     "Yah, so?" She crossed her arms over her chest.
     "Well, I, my rugby team, they're supposed to come by here in
about," he checked his watch, "half an hour, and you're supposed to be
tied up and waiting." He pointed to the side of the trail. "There's a
fire road about half a mile over there, and they should be parked
there."
     "And, and you were going to tie me to a tree, and they were all
going to have their way with me?" she asked him, taking a step closer
and lowering her voice.
     He nodded, not daring to look at her.
     "Oh, Johnny," she said, and tipped his chin up so he was looking at
her. "You are so sweet..." She kissed him.
     "Well, you made my fantasy come true, and I wanted to make yours
come true too." Her eyes were shining as she smiled up at him.
     Beth took a step back and dropped her pack on the ground. When she
started unbuttoning her shirt, Johnny asked, "Beth? What are you-"
     She grinned at him. "I thought you were going to do something
stupid like tie me up and leave me or something." She dropped her shirt
on her pack, then pulled her sports bra over her head. "This I can
handle!"

+++

     The irregular thumping caught Dan's attention. Finally, he looked
up at Chris, and asked, "What's that noise?"
     Chris made a face. "It's my dad and his boyfriend goin' at it.
Gross," he added.
     "What's so gross about it?" Dan asked.
     Chris sat up a little straighter, and began waving his hands around
as he tried to talk. "I mean, you know, after Mom left, I'm glad he
found someone and all that, and it doesn't bug me that he found a guy
and all that, Steve's okay, it, it's just..."
     "Just what?"
     Chris's face twisted into an even uglier grimace. "It's my DAD,
man, don't you get it?"
     "No..." Dan was baffled.
     "Well, I mean, I mean..." Chris' face lit up. "Think about YOUR
dad having sex in the next room."
     The image that came to Dan's mind was so awful - though he couldn't
have explained exactly WHY it was so horrible - he blocked it out
instantly. He saw Chris nodding. "Yeah, see?"
     "Yeah," Dan replied solemnly. "Hey, you wanna go downstairs and
watch TV or something?"
     "Anything," Chris agreed gratefully, and the two boys got up and
almost ran out of Chris' room. The thumping continued behind them.

+++

     "I'll walk you to the porch," PJ offered. Her nails tapped a
rhythmic pattern on the steering wheel.
     "Oh, that's okay, thanks," Carol said, smiling.
     "Come on," PJ suggested, and swung out of the car, and around to
Carol's door.
     "PJ, come on, you're being-"
     "Silly?" PJ asked as she opened the door and bowed at Carol. Carol
giggled, and nodded. "If you can't have fun on a date, why go?"
     Carol sighed, but it was a happy sigh, and she accepted the hand
that PJ offered. PJ didn't really let go as they walked up to the porch
of Carol's house, either.
     PJ asked, "Did you have fun tonight?" Carol nodded. "I thought
you would," she grinned. "Didn't I tell you you could have fun?"
     "Yes, PJ, you did," Carol admitted. "And... I did have fun
tonight." She was still pleasantly full from dinner, and pleasantly
buzzed from the wine they'd shared, and pleasantly tired from the
dancing they'd done afterwards. Carol couldn't remember the last time
she'd felt so relaxed. Or happy.
     They got to Carol's front door, and they stopped, and turned to
face each other, just like every other date in high school Carol had
ever had... She giggled.
     "What?"
     Carol shook her head. "Do all first dates end at the front door?"
     PJ grinned impishly. "They don't haaaave to," she drawled, then
laughed.
     Carol just looked at PJ for a while. She didn't want the evening
to end, but this was their first date, and anything more would be
pushing it. She kept telling herself this-
     The door swept open, and Michael, her nine year old, called out,
"Kiss her Mom, kiss her!" With a shriek, his sister Amanda swept him up
and kicked the door shut, leaving the two once again by themselves.
Faint yells inside the house told of some sort of sibling dispute. It
didn't take a genius to figure out the cause.
     Carol, her mouth still open, looked helplessly at PJ, who shrugged.
"Should I come in while you finish beating him, or should we call it a
night?"
     A scream from inside decided her. "Oh, hell, come on in for a
minute..." She dug her keys out of her purse and fumbled at the lock.

+++

     Ray was whispering, or panting, all the nasty things he was going
to do to her into Cindy's ear as he slowly stroked in and out of her,
and Cindy was loving every minute of it. She couldn't remember when she
had been so hot, couldn't remember-
     "AHHHHHHH!" Ray screamed right into her ear, and she screamed back,
deafened and frightened and in pain from the aural assault.
     "I'm gonna KILL that fucking cat!" Ray howled in rage as he pulled
out of Cindy and lept off the bed. As she dazedly pushed herself
upright, she noticed three red streaks on Ray's gorgeous rump as he
dashed out of the bedroom.

+++

     "Tighter!" Karl demanded.
     Instead of pulling the laces tighter, Doug collapsed on the floor.
"My hands hurt, Karl," he explained.
     "Come on, you can get it tighter than that," Karl urged. He was
still holding on the the bedpost.
     Doug complained, "Don't you think that's good enough?"
     "No!" Karl let go, and stood up on the heels he was wearing. Doug
thought he was an idiot, but Karl had insisted that it would help him
get into the role. As if being that much more over six feet tall was
going to be of any help, Doug thought sourly.
     "Doug, listen, I have GOT to beat Josh, or-"
     "What is the big deal about this anyway?" Teresa demanded. "Just
because you two got the same idea at the same-"
     "He STOLE it from me," Karl gestured emphatically at her, "and I am
NOT gonna let him get away with this! It was MY idea in the first
place, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna let him win homecoming queen
without a fight!" Doug halfway expected Karl to shake his fists in the
air like a pro wrestler.
     Instead, Doug sighed, and got up. "Teresa, come on and help, or
Karl here is not gonna fit into that dress." Teresa got up from the
bed, where she was waiting to do Karl's makeup, and took one end of the
laces while Doug gripped the other. "On three..."

+++

     Lisa listened with the stethescope to the sounds emanating,
faintly, from 221. Finally, she nodded, and pulled the plugs out of her
ears. "They're fucking," she confirmed as she tucked the 'scope in her
pocket and readjusted her glasses.
     Sandy shook her head. "I swear to God, it doesn't matter what
they're like, as soon as they spend a month in there, they're fucking
like bunnies!"
     "Like you and-"
     "Shut UP!" Sandy hissed. "Yes!" Her face heated up almost
instantly, she could feel it.
     Lisa got up and moved away from the door, saying as she did, "But I
thought you two had been together in high school?"
     "No, we were just friends before then, but when we got here, it
was, it was like..." Words failed her.
     Lisa shook her head. "There's only one way to find out. We'd have
to do a double blind study on it. Get some of the other girls switched
around and see who ends up bonking who." She stood there, tapping her
finger against her chin. "Hmmm. Who do I know in Student Housing..."

+++

     Jen looked up as her husband walked back into their bedroom, and,
unusually, locked the door very carefully behind him. "Did you get them
to quiet down?" she asked.
     "No."
     Jen waited. Finally, she asked, "Why not?"
     Hank looked up at her, and she was a bit disturbed by the look on
his face. It was... shocked. And not pleasantly.
     His mouth worked uselessly for a few seconds, then finally he found
his voice again, and said, "They're..."
     "They're what, dear?" she led.
     He turned around and pointed back towards the stairs. "They're,
they're having an orgy down there."
     "I... It's a slumber party for a bunch of seventh grader girls,
Hank! They can't be-"
     He was nodding. "I know, but that's what they're doing."
     There was silence, broken only by a series of faint, high-pitched
shrieks from downstairs.

+++

     "Daddy?"
     "Yes, sweetheart?" Sam looked at his daughter Amber. It struck
him again, how fast she was growing up. It seemed like yesterday that
she'd been wanting him to tie her shoes for her, and-
     "Um." She looked embarrassed, now that she'd spoken.
     "What is it?"
     "Um, well, you know, I, Peter invited me to the Homecoming Dance,
it's next week, and I, I, uh..." Her face was quickly turning red, as
were her ears.
     He tried not to laugh, but it was an effort. "Mmm hmm?"
     She gushed out, "And I was wondering, since I don't have anything
to wear," he almost snorted at that, "I was wondering if I could borrow
something nice to wear for him?"
     "One of my dresses?" Sam asked. She nodded. "Sure, hon- oh." she
looked up, anxious at the tone of his voice. "Um, I don't think you'd
fit in any of mine, sweetheart. You're quite a bit smaller than your
ol' dad."
     Her face fell. "Oh," she said, in a voice so full of despair and
resignation that he couldn't stand it. Luckily, an idea popped into his
head even as he was wondering how to fit a size sixteen dress onto a
size seven child.
     "Waitaminute, I- Let me think. I know SOMEONE in town has to be
your size-"
     "Stacy?" she asked hopefully.
     He nodded, slowly. "I'd bet she is, now that you mention it. Want
me to call her?"
     "Oh, please Dad, it would mean so much..." She was practically
jumping up and down in excitement.

+++

     "Now, we are going to stand here until I get an explanation."
     Tracy stared at the nine silent, naked, oil-drenched teenagers
standing in front of her. A Twister mat lay on the living room floor,
looking somehow forlorn in its abandonment. Tracy could have cared
less. The new carpet they'd spent almost a thousand dollars on, and her
son has one of his bright party ideas right on top of it. "Reynold?"
she asked her son. "Perhaps you have something to say about this?"

+++

     Rob opened his locker, and was confronted by a large white box.
"Ahh," he said, surprised more than a little. "What the-"
     Sam snatched the box out of his locker before he could figure out
what it was, even. "Hey, look, SOMEone gave Rob flowers!"
     Rob's howled "Give those back!" was drowned out by the hoots of the
rest of the football team as Sam lept on top of a bench and carefully
opened the box. "Damnit, give me mmmph!" he yelled until someone
grabbed him and pulled him back. Despite weighing as much as his mother
and father together, he wasn't the largest guy on the team, Carlos was.
Carlos was right behind him, holding him in a full nelson.
     Sam displayed a dozen red roses, which drew whistles from the team,
and then pulled out a small card. Rob fought and struggled against
Carlos, but it was to no avail. "It says," Sam intoned, "'Good luck in
the game tonight, see you after?' Signed, Josh."
     The team broke out in mixed laughter and catcalls before they broke
up to finish getting ready. Carlos dropped Rob as Sam stepped off the
bench and handed the flowers to the red-faced running back.
     "Jerk," Rob mentioned, embarrassed beyond words.
     Unexpectedly, Carlos replied, "Hey, it's sweet he sent you flowers
before a game."
     Rob sighed. "Yeah...."
     Sam clapped him on the shoulder. "Better get those in water. And
don't eat 'em!"

+++

     "I swear, it's her!" Sean whispered as he covertly pulled the
Penthouse out of his backpack. "Full color, four pages-"
     "Shut UP and give it to me!" Dan complained as he snatched the
magazine.
     "Page twenty-two," Sean said, and Dan started flipping pages.
     Then, he got to page 22, and beyond, and it was indeed their math
teacher, in glorious full color and completely NUDE, and on the next
page she was kissing another GIRL... "Oh my God," Dan breathed in awe,
"it IS her..."
     A hand came down and removed the magazine from his grasp. He was
going to get up and start a fight when he noticed that it was Miz
Brockton, the math teacher and apparently one of this month's models as
well. That froze him.
     "Yes, it is me," she said quietly, "and you're not supposed to have
this stuff in school. See me after the end of the day to get it back."
And with that, she tucked the magazine in her attache and walked off.
     Sean and Dan looked at each other in gaping silence...

+++

     "Oh you bloody idiot!" Mistress Evelyn cursed Jerry, and he
cringed. "When I said 'suspenders,' you JACKass," she snarled, "I
didn't mean braces! I meant bloody suspenders!"
     Mistress Maria must've been passing by, because Jerry heard her
exclaim, "What the..." and then burst out laughing.

+++

"I dream of rain, ay-lay-aeeeay-lay...." - Sting

 
 
Distribution: No part of this work may be distributed as an original work by another person or group.

Permission is given to redistribute this by electronic means, as long as the entirety of the work (from the BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE header to the END PGP SIGNATURE footer) is distributed, and credit is given to the original author, me.

Archiving is permitted provided no fee is charged for access.

And, if they inspire you, feel free to use the names and even the bit of text verbatim in a story of your own, IF and ONLY IF you send me a copy of the completed work when you're ready for publication, posting, or archiving, and if you mention where you got the idea and who wrote the original - me.

All rights reserved. ~Ellen.

+ ==[-------- Ellen Hayes @>--,--'---      [email protected] +
PGP DH/DSS keyfing: 33D4 156A AE39 53E2 0313 6714 2878 56A8 61B0 9CDC
+ http://www.barkingduck.net/ehayes -=[1990]=- vicki .sig virus 11.4 +

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Comments

Hilarious

Some of these are so funny...

Wonderful ...

Sara Selvig's picture

Like visiting an old friend. Come back again soon!

Sara


Between the wrinkles, the orthopedic shoes, and nine decades of gravity, it is really hard to be alluring. My icon, you ask? It is the last picture I allowed to escape the camera ... back before most BC authors were born.

Chips

Daphne Xu's picture

I enjoyed most of these. A few, I couldn't make head nor tail of.

Did Ellen Hayes post this herself? Or did someone post them on her behalf? The posting is dated 2017, which is more recent than any other time I heard her mentioned. So if you read this, can you reply, Ellen?

-- Daphne Xu (a page of contents)