White horses dancing on the waves

White horses dancing on the waves - the young woman looks out of the window towards the lake a sad smile on her face - her mind elsewhere as she ponders her last phone call a few days ago to a old friend...

The words " it would be better if you was not so out about your lifestyle to others "  showing just how little her well meaning friend understands things - just like the question "why can't you just stay the same?"  when she was first coming out to her friend as transgender - some times one has to rock the boat even if doing so makes others uncomfortable...

To her it was simply - she had to start being her real self - there was no other path - as she said to her well meaning friend when her friend said she was all ways taking the hard road -  who says I see any other path?    She knows that she can be blunt to people at times - some times that's whats needed to get the point across - like when she told her mum " you can have a dead son or a alive   daughter as that is simply what would of happened...

She thinks back to the TV show she was on last year ( a 20 m Doc on new Zealand TV  about her disabilitys /her travels and the search for some thing in her life  (including being transgender and the start of her transition from her old (unhappy) life to her new (happier) life)  sometimes she thinks why she give the ok to the TV people - in her heart she knows why - it's was never about being a TV star or even being on TV but to help people understand that transgender people are just people trying they best to find they way in life - just like any one else in life does....  

Yes she outed herself to the world (on nz TV at that) - knowing that there would be at lest some backlash from hateful people towards her and possibly friends /family  but some times people have to take a risk to help change the world...   

A thought that runs through her head as she thinks about the last year or so - you know you are helping to change the world for the better when you start getting death theats from people who want the world to stay the same

Yet on the other side she has had people call her brave /a hero (she never knows what to think about being called such things - they not terms that sit well with her )  some people had come forward to her - some in person - some on line - to say how seeing the tv program helped then with a better understanding of what it's like to be transgender -  that transgender people are not sexual pervents /jokes or other nasty things that transgender people have offen been  protrade by in the media as being - offen in movies /daytime TV shows  - during the making of the TV show she had to explain things to the tv crew so her story would be told right - to any other people she just would say no to any TV suff as she would never be able trust then to not twist the story to get higher rating as what often happens

The young women is a very private person with trust issues so it was not easy to find her self in front of TV cameras - still she went forward with it knowing if it would only help one person it would of been worth it...

She knows the numbers well -  the ones that try to end it seeing now way out - once she was there - now she does what she can to help others find a different path - like she has done in her life

Still as she looks out the window towards the lake at the white horses dancing on the waves - the sounds of the fast food restaurant she's in just back round noise to her - she ponders both how far understanding of transgender issues have come yet how far they still have to go - the sign to the bathroom a sharp reminder of that....



If you liked this post, you can leave a comment and/or a kudos!
Click the Thumbs Up! button below to leave the author a kudos:
up
115 users have voted.
If you liked this post, you can leave a comment and/or a kudos! Click the "Thumbs Up!" button above to leave a Kudos

And please, remember to comment, too! Thanks. 
This story is 726 words long.