As the anaesthetist started the countback, I wondered what vaginoplasty was. The Price to Pay - Vol. 1.5 - Decisions by Alys

The ambulance sped its way to the hospital, all traces of drowsiness that I had felt earlier when I was woken up were dispelled as soon as the ambulance siren was activated.

"What's going on?" I asked my Mother who was sitting next to me in the ambulance while my father followed behind in the family car.

"We had a phone call an hour ago from the hospital. It seems that one of the doctors in Mr Johnson's team did some research and found a hospital in the USA doing a trial of a cocktail of drugs against your type of cancer, they contacted the hospital doing the trial and got some details of the drugs they needed and the preliminary results. They said nearly everyone had survived so far, after about two years of running the trial."

"But why all this?" I asked pointing at the ambulance, "couldn't I have started taking the drugs tomorrow?"

"The hospital doctor who spoke to us explained that unless they operated to remove as much of the cancerous tissue as soon as possible the drugs would not be effective enough"

I lay back on the stretcher and thought about all the topsy-turvy last couple of days, first I was fine and was going home and maybe going on a trial with a top football team, then I had a few weeks to live and now I was being offered the chance of life again. 'I wish fate would make up its mind,' I thought to myself.

The ambulance pulled quickly into the hospital accident and emergency centre and I was taken off on a trolley. I was soon being pushed rapidly by a hospital porter along the winding, seemingly endless corridors. After a few minutes journey, that seemed a lot longer, I was pushed into an operating theatre and put onto a table. I was surrounded by a number of doctors and nurses already wearing their medical scrubs.

"Hello Celyn, I'm pleased that we can do this for you," said the man I recognised as Mr Johnson, the consultant, from our earlier conversation, "You are a pioneer for this procedure in the UK, I am quite excited to be in the forefront of cancer treatment"

" You are lucky that Mr John Carson, the leading expert in vaginoplasty on the NHS, happened to be in Wales for a few days and is able to assist us" he continued pointing at a fit looking middle aged man.

As the anaesthetist started the countback, I wondered what vaginoplasty was.

I had a terribly dry throat. I heard the sound of a heart monitor beeping a regular note. I opened my eyes. I noticed a drip attached to my arm. Down below I felt nothing but I saw that there were some tubes leaving the general area of my groin. I moved and felt all sorts of pains in strange places in my lower abdomen and groin. I moaned. A nurse appeared and injected something in my drip. I felt soothed, relaxed and pain free and dropped back to sleep.

I opened an eye, my Mother sat next to my bed, she was reading my magazine.

"Hello Mum," I croaked.

"Celyn! You're awake. You've been out for ten hours"

"Drink please," I muttered a little more distinctly.

She held a mug of water to my mouth, I took a few sips and my throat felt a little relieved.

"Did it go allright, Mum?" I asked.

"A great success darling, now you need to rest, no more talking"

I drifted back off to sleep, tired after the effort of conversation.

It was dark outside, I noticed from the windows, as I woke up a little later. I realised that it must be getting on for twenty four hours since I was brought in. My Father was dozing in the chair next to me.

"Hey Dad," I said

He started, and then sat up and looked at me, smiling.

"Hey Celyn, you're awake, how are you feeling?" he asked.

"Tired Dad, but not too bad, there is some pain down there, but one thing that's puzzling me, things feel a bit odd down there,"

My Father gave me a strange look, almost one of guilt, then stood up.

"I'll just fetch your Mum, she's in the canteen having a coffee, won't be long"

As he left a young, pretty nurse came up and took my vitals to enter on the chart at the bottom of the bed.

"How are you feeling my dear?" she asked gently.

"Not too bad Jenny," I replied looking at her name tag, "but everything feels very strange down there"

"Don't worry honey we'll take the catheter and the packing out of you tomorrow and you will feel better then and be more mobile"

The nurse smiled at me and then moved on to her next patient.

Packing? catheter? 'out of me'? What was going on here, I wondered.

My parents returned and sat down next to the bed.

"How are you feeling now, sweetheart" my Mother asked.

"What have they done to me Mum, everything feels really strange down there" I said nodding my head towards my lower body.

She started to cry, tears running down her face destroying her carefully made up face

"I am so sorry Celyn, we had to make a decision quickly we couldn't risk upsetting you before the surgery there was no time for a delay" said my Father

"I hope you can forgive us"

"What have they done!?"

"They've turned you into a girl" he responded quietly, touching me on my arm and looking at me

Everything turned black as my mind shut down