All It Would Take

Fan Fiction Sequel of the 1986 movie Willy Milly

4 - Can't I Be Both?

By Sasha Zarya Nexus

This fan fiction piece is based on the original work, Willy Milly aka Something Special; by Willy Milly Associates, Concorde, copyright 1985.. All original characters and plot lines are the property of the owners, and any resemblance to individuals either living or dead is coincidental. This piece is for entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a copyright infringement. No income is being derived from this fan fiction piece.

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Four ~ Can't I Be Both?

I was amazed to see Tina come up from a different direction entirely. I looked her way and quit holding back the look of terror on my face while she could see me but the boys didn't. She gave me a knowing look along with a smile that allowed me to relax and know that she would make everything alright.

"Boys, I'm afraid I need Miss Molly now. Trust me on this, this next step can't be delayed. Tina walked in front of me and extended a hand to help me get up gracefully with everything that I had on that I wasn't used to on top of not being used to my new body.

I looked back over at Max who looked disappointed and Gary who looked relieved that our chance encounter was over.

"I have to go, now, Max. I'm so sorry. Perhaps another time?"

"I'd like that very much, Molly. Good Luck!"

"Right this way, Miss Molly" Tina pointed the way and I gracefully moved to exit the chair and start to follow her only turning back to wave goodbye to both Gary and Max.

We parted without another word from Gary. I had been surprised at how just under the surface of Gary's manners was still an aversion to me. I wasn't sure just how much of that restraint was for Max's benefit or if he knew he could not go beyond a certain point without more reprisals.

Tina led me to her shampoo chair and began giving me a shampoo to remove the dye from my hair.

"Tina, I am so glad that you arrived when you did. I don't know why but Max didn't have a clue to who I was but Gary sure did. I was so afraid that Gary would out me."

"Well outing you would out him as well for his connection to you as his friend when you were a Tom boy. Don't be so scared of Gary, if you don't push him, he'll keep your secret for his own reasons.

"Guess you're right, Tina. Being scared of Gary wasn't my only problem."

"Yeah, you had that deer caught in the headlights look. Max can be quite a charmer towards the ladies when he wants to be. "

"Well Duh! I was being charmed by a boy for the first time ever!"

"And?" Lisa was looking over at me like she knew I was holding something back.

"And I think I liked it. Does that make me wierd?"

"Nope! Makes you a girl, Molly. Enjoy it!"

"Tina, speaking of firsts, this is the first time that I've been in a full service salon. My father had a loyalty to a style shop that originally was a barber shop in his father's day. You have a wonderful way of taking care of me!"

"It's all just part of our care for our clients, Molly. I'm glad you've let those 'Tom boy' days go! Maybe, you will enjoy being a girl!." Tina winked and smiled at me as she covered publicly like she would for the cover story 'experiment'.

"My first shampoo in a salon is something else. I'll never shampoo my hair before I get my hair cut just to save money. This is too good to miss."

"Miss, you are so right!" We laughed together as I laid back as my seat reclined to the point that my hair was in a basin and my neck rested at the edge of it. It was so wonderful for Tina to wet my hair and then the wonderful scent of the shampoo and my head being massaged as she worked the shampoo into my hair.

"I am so jealous of your hair, Molly. It's so rich and thick, naturally straight but very full of body."

I laid back and enjoyed being taken care of and the sensations I was feeling for the first time. with my instantly grown overnight shoulder length hair. Even though it was the hair that I was feeling, what consumed me the most was the view that I had looking down at my own instant cleavage. Since I was so distracted from laying out, Tina used the signal we had worked out for me to be conscious of keeping my legs together, several times.

"Your mother authorized you getting all new personal care products from the salon, Molly, so you'll go home with a whole new set of hair care products to take home.   You'll get to immerse yourself in the sensations and scents of this at home as well.

"Bath time is going to be a lot more fun from now on!" We both giggled together. Being a girl was going to be a lot of discovery in the short term once things slowed down enough for me to have some private time.

"Molly, we are just about thru, all that is left is for me to rinse your hair."

"Thank you so much for introducing me to such enjoyment, Tina. I'm very lucky that we both are involved in public service or else a Tom boy like I have been might not had the chance to spend time with you and growing together as friends." I smiled up at her and she gave me a peck on my forehead. After all to short a time Tina rinsed my hair of the shampoo.

"I'm proud that you are my friend, Molly. You are an amazing person! Next stop for you is back to Louise to get your hair cut"

Tina patted my hair dry and wrapped up my hair in a towel like a turban. She was about to help me up when my cell gave it's text ring. I looked at it and gasp. It was from Gary!

'Witch sty awy frm Max'

Tina saw how my spirits dropped and took the cell from my hands.

"I'm so sorry, Molly. I guess that Gary is holding a grudge. Well, you're gonna find out what a lift it is to be pampered so let's get you back to that." Tina then helped me get up.

"Lead on Tina" Tina brought me back to Louise's station.

"I'll take it from here, Tina. I'll call you when she's ready for her next treat" Louise took the turban off and began to manipulate my hair.

"Molly, we can do a lot with your hair.   What would you like?"

"I'm not used to asking for what I want. I'd like to see what having bangs are like and long hair. I'd like the ends of my hair to be cut even."

"You did pretty good, Molly. You may not know what the names of hair styles are but you made your wants understood to me. That's good."

I'm not sure exactly what Louise did because she was a sorceress with the shears as well. Before long she had cut my hair and combed it out . She placed a quick call and turned my chair around to the mirror and gave me a hand mirror to look at the back.

"Louise, that's amazing! I can't believe how beautiful I look with my new style and hair color."

"Thank you Molly! Tina should be here soon to take you to your next stop. Oh here she is!"

I looked and Tina was rounding the corner all smiles. "You look wonderful Molly. Are you ready for our next stop?"

"Sure!" Just then Lisa appeared followed by Mom and Grandma. "We came to collect you, Molly!"

"She isn't done yet, she's hardly started."

"We've come to an impasse. Even though the clothes fit me and I'm Molly's size, today's styles are outside their comfort zone. With Molly so recently being a Tom Boy, they want to make sure that my choices are not too much for you."

Lisa, is right, Sweetie. We need you for the rest of this shopping trip. Some basics we were able to cover with an assortment but we need you before we agree to the kind of style that Lisa says that you need to wear to fit in with the other girls. I'll make it up to you, Sweetie by doing the rest of your makeover later. You look very sweet as a redhead with your new haircut!"

"Okay, Momma. I guess the rest can wait. Lets go shopping! Tina, can you lead me back to where my clothes are?"

"Instead of putting those on, wear these that we just bought." Lisa handed me a bag with an outfit inside it.

"Okay Tina?"

"Sure, Molly. Let's go!"

Tina led me back to the changing room and I took off the smock and changed into the outfit in the bag. The sizes were right on and checking out my appearance in the mirror, I really liked what I saw. This girl in the mirror was really hot and that girl was me!

"Look at the new girl strut her stuff!"

"I feel really good in this outfit, Tina. Lisa did good and so did you Tina. I'll be back soon for the rest of the treatment"

"You better, Molly! Be careful and call me later and fill me in on the rest. Okay?"

"Sure Tina"

"There she is! Are you comfortable in those clothes, Sweetie?"

"I am Momma. C'mon let's go!"

"Okay!"

We waved goodbye to Tina and checked out with the receptionist while setting up a return appointment for me to do the rest. Lisa had a self assured 'I told you so' grin at how I was glowing in the outfit that she had picked out for me. Sure it was emerald green with a low scooped neck and a short skirt but instead of being self conscious in it, I felt really good. I admit that I felt a tad bit sexy in it too and sexy felt really good.

We went back past the food court and I just had to have a yogurt. Momma said we could stop so we all gathered around the table . Grandma and Lisa went to get the yogurt cones while Momma and I caught our breaths.

"Even the shopping trip is going to have to be cut short. I have to get you to the Doctors to get checked out when its time for your appointment"

"S'ok Momma. By the way when is Lisa's Mother meeting us?"

"How about now, Hi Milly and Molly"

"Steph!" Momma got up and she hugged her friend then I hugged her too.

"Molly you look great as a redhead. I love your new haircut and outfit."

"Thank you Mrs. Winners. I'm glad you got to join us for this."

"This is a lot more fun than the shopping trip that we went on to outfit Willy with his new wardrobe. Shopping for boy's clothes is so boring."

Grandma and Lisa came with the cones and much to my surprise, there was one for Lisa's Mother as well.

"Hi Mom" Lisa took a yogurt cone and passed it to her as well as passing one to Grandma, Momma and me.

"Thank you Lisa" was echoed as we all took our cones.

"I had to spin a tale about who I am back at the Salon. Max spotted me as I was waiting for my color to take. I think that he has a crush on me. He asked where I was from and I got flustered and mentioned Maine and Russia in my garbled response. Gary was with him and questioned me without giving me away."

"Whatcha say?"

"I told Max that I was an exchange student named Molly from Russia and that I was living with the Bensdorfs and that Wally was going to live as an exchange student in Russia"

"That could work actually."

"Ya think?"

"Well I just changed schools across town. How we got away with it was a miracle."

"Well it had the advantage in that it didn't last that long before you were back as Milly""

"Steph, have you heard anything from Malcolm?"

"Not a word, Milly. I've looked to see if he left anything behind with a clue to his whereabouts and nothing shows up.I'm sorry"

"Thank you for trying, Steph."

"Molly, how did you decide so soon to embrace being a girl. I remember that even after we'd taken her to the doctors she still was unable to make a clear choice."

"I guess I felt that I could do okay as either a boy or girl. Momma never judged me for what I wanted to do but others have. That's why we did the ballet and field hockey on the south side of town. Grandma, would you tell me how it went for Mom?"

"Sure Molly, things went like this right after we came from the doctors.The Doctors said that she would have to make a choice. Somehow they felt like Milly had to have been born that way.:"

"I imagine that they never were as intimately involved with the Neskapi Indians as we were, Molly."

"Of that I'm sure Momma."

"Go ahead and tell Molly about it, Mom. I can see how it could help Molly to know how my decision was reached."

"Well it started when Milly asked in the Doctor's office just before we left, 'Can't I be both?' We got Milly home and began our own discussion of that starting with her Father's assessment of the situation as it stood then:"

"There will be no grey in this house. For fourteen years, we thought you were a girl. That's okay. That's alright. Any one can make a mistake. And now you are telling us you want to be a boy."

"Milly replied, 'Well, I think so. Yes!'"

"I reacted, 'I can't believe this.; I can't believe this.'

"Milly's father continued, 'And you want to be a girl too.'"

"Well, on the outside, I'll be a boy. For all practical purposes, I'll be a boy."

"I pleaded with Milly since I was so upset about what she planned to do, 'Be a liberated woman. Be what ever you want. But not a boy!'"

Milly got up from the couch and came over to me and held my hands to comfort me. 'I'll still be a girl on the inside, Ma. That will be our secret.'"

"Then Milly's Father took charge and stated, 'No! No! No! There will be no girlish boys in this family. You make your decision and abide by it. Black or White. ' He gestured with both hands powerfully raised, Boy!' He lowered them in a limp wrist girlish gesture, 'Or girl.' "

"Fred wouldn't let Milly be a girl inside so I felt like I had lost her. 'Oh God! Milly. Please. The years of ballet, the posture lessons, your braces, your junior miss colonial bedroom set! Honey, please, stay on my side.'

Fred interrupted with the beginning of a shouting match, "Your side? Is that what it is? Your side?"

"Fred, she has always been a girl!"

"Now, she wants to be a boy!"

"Well, her being a boy is ridiculous!"

"Well, I'm a boy. Am I ridiculous?"

"It was with a lot of self restraint that I didn't fill the opening that Fred left for me. Milly had already left when we began to raise our voices"

Stephanie added, "I was on the roof outside Milly's window looking at the stars when Milly asked me, 'Do you think this was my deepest, darkest, heart's desire?"

"Could be."

"The doctors said that it was there all the time."

"Well I guess they had never heard of the Neskapi Indians before."

"Oh God, Steph. It's like there is this whole other side of me that I've never seen. Do you think that I should do it, I mean, try it out at least?"

"I didn't know what to answer so I just kept silent. Milly was still thinking about her decision when I went home."

Momma explained, "In the end I left it to fate.; I had my name, Milly, in cardboard, plaid letters attached to my bulletin board with thumbtacks. I spun the leading M around and when it stopped it ceased being an 'M' and instead pointed up to be a 'W' and my name Milly had become Willy. I informed my parents of my final decision and pledged to Dad that I would try to be all boy. He accepted that and the preparations started for my new life as Willy."

"Hey, I did the same thing too! only when the W in Wally became an 'M' I didn't like Mally which would have made me a Mallorie. That's French for luckless. Not me at all! I changed it to Molly instead."

"Are you sure that you gave it enough thought before you made your choice, Molly?"

"In the end, I believed the same way that you did, Momma. I'd discovered a whole other side of me. I believe it is because you let me discover that gender did not have to be a barrier to doing what I wanted to do, that I could understand what gender really is and which gender matched the real me."

'"I'm very proud of you Molly.; It's okay to reconsider your decision if you need to since gender is one thing that it is good to be certain about once you have tried out living as a girl for a while"

"Thanks Momma. If I have my doubts, you'll be the first to know. I have faith in you to fix it even if Malcolm is no where to be found."

We finished our cones and we all descended on the stores with a purpose in mind. Little did I know that the blouses, slacks, shorts, skirts and dresses along with shoes and purses would only be enough to take care of immediate needs. In order to really build a wardrobe, It would take some extensive shopping trips over the next year to round out my wardrobe.

Browsing the discount racks was very profitable since we were able to get some basics for the previous season at great prices. However I found that just because something had a low price tag, didn't mean it was a bargain even if it did fit me. It may as well stay in the store it all it would do was hang in my closet and never get worn.

Much sooner than I would have liked, Momma warned us that it was time for us to go to see the doctor for me. Lisa and her mother said goodbye while Momma, Grandma and I loaded both us and my new clothes into the car and we went off to see the doctor.

On the way to the doctors, I wondered what they would say about me. More than that I wondered if I had accepted being a girl too quickly. My own mother had gone thru the same thing and it seemed like she had thought about it a great deal more than I had done before I made my decision. Could it be that the reason that I accepted being a girl so easily is that I had been one all along? 

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