The Misadventures of Ultra Girl!-2 by Lynceus Just when you thought it was safe to grab a quick bite to eat! Enter...The White Rabbit?!

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Disclaimer: I make no claims to any character or image owned or under copyright by another party, nor do I intend on profiting in any way from their use. The Comics Retcon Universe concept is the creative property of Lilith Langtree.

Reno, Nevada

It had been another long night as “Ultra Girl”. I'd been trying my best to not patrol a set area, dealing with threats all over the country. I mean, I knew it was only a matter of time before people started putting two and two together (if they haven't already!) and figured out who “Ultra Girl” really was, but I figured I should at least try to keep up the charade.

So far, at least, no one had shown up to try and recruit me...hell, I hadn't even had my first “team-up” yet! I mean, as Ultra Girl, that is. As goofy as my plan was, it seems to be working; at the very least, I haven't had any visits from unfriendly Green Lanterns yet!

It felt good to be seen as my own person, and not just “Green Lantern's sidekick”. Hell, if anything, U-Girl seemed more popular than my old identity ever had been. Some enterprising soul was already marketing “Who is Ultra Girl?” merchandise! I guess I should be annoyed that I'm not getting a cut of the proceeds, but the stuff was actually pretty cool-looking, and I couldn't resist ordering a tee-shirt.

I was planning on wearing it to school as soon as it came in the mail. Totally meta, right?

Really though, it was hard to stand out as a supergirl these days. It seems like you couldn't walk five feet without running into one! I'd been keeping a list for some time now, and even though I'm sure it's not complete, there's a lot of entries.

Jade, Terra, American Dream, Miss Mars, The Spectre, The Flash, Cosmic Girl, Night Girl, Free Spirit, Giganta, Purgatori, Dream Girl, The Lightning, Aquagirl...the list just goes on. Not to mention a pair of new heroes who popped up recently in Boston, Miss Terrific and Doll-Girl.

A population explosion of superheroines. And a lot of them used to be guys! I really wish I understood why that was. I mean, I know how it happened to me, but for a lot of the others, it was a total mystery.

I hadn't really heard of any male superheroes, to be honest. And villains are still in short supply as well. Oh sure, there's Lena's dad, and that lunatic Superia, but I really didn't count Clara Ann or even Lily as bad guys. Well okay, Mordru, but I think it's safe to say he won't be a problem any time soon.

Hm, I wonder how they're getting along. Of course, Alison says she's encountered some real bad types across the pond. Mostly due to following Johanna around, I bet.

So yeah, I've had a lot to think about lately, and nobody to talk to about it. Which is my own fault, and I know it. But I have enemies out there, and I'm not ready to take too many risks just yet. Still, I suppose I should fly out to Chicago and visit L + R and Doris.

Tomorrow.

The empty feeling in my tummy was getting hard to ignore. It doesn't affect me as badly as it does Larfleeze, but my caloric intake has noticeably increased. Mom keeps thinking I got some kind of alien tapeworm. If only she knew!

I guess it would be worse if I wasn't drawing off my own power source, but still, the machine needs fuel. I've learned that there's a limit to how much I can draw on the Star-Heart before I hit rock bottom.

I saw a Kwikkee Burger restaurant and decided that would do. I dampened my light-trail and veiled myself as I descended. I was just about to change my appearance when I saw what was going on in the restaurant.

The patrons and staff were on the floor, while the manager was handing two large sacks over the counter. One full of bills, the other with Kwikkee Double Cheesburgers!

And he was handing them to a woman whose fashion sense would make Alison try to tear her eyes out!

She had long reddish-blonde hair, and was wearing a long Victorian-style blue coat, was carrying a purple umbrella, and, I kid you not, had a pair of white rabbit ears on the top of her head! She had a couple big beefy guys with her, wearing letterman-style jackets, except instead of a sports team, the back of each jacket had the image of a playing card on the back.

One was the Three of Spades, and the other was the Jack of Clubs. Oh and they had guns. Big ones.

Three grabs the loot, and the woman turns. She's got a killer figure, but she's younger than I first thought, maybe a year older than I am. She's painted her face white, but it's a professional job. Under the coat, she's wearing a white corset over an equally white leotard, and, oddly enough, white slacks and fur-lined boots. A pocket watch hangs from her coat, and she has a pair of white gloves.

Really, she looked more like a cartoon character than a person. A hot cartoon character, but still!

I become visible and slam open the doors. “I'd like a #4 combo and three sides of bad guy, to go!”

The goons raise their guns, but the girl just gets this big, crazy smile. “And here I thought I'd have to rob a library to get some attention! Look who it is, boys, Ultra Girl!”

I felt a little shiver go down my spine. There was something about the girl's voice...focus Alena, focus! Now's definitely not the time! “I'm afraid so. Might as well put down the guns, Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle-Dee, they won't work on me.” What can I say, I picked up on the Wonderland-schtick.

If anything, the girl's smile got even wider. “Ooh I like that! Bob, Tim, from now on, those are your new names!”

The Jack of Clubs didn't seem to care for this turn of events. “There's no way I'm letting you call me Tweedle-Dee!”

Three of Spaces growled. “Hey, are you calling me dumb?”

“Boys, boys, shh. Take the money and go, I'll deal with Ultra-Girl.”

I grinned. “You're pretty confident, ain't ya?”

She leaped forward, and I barely had time to move to the side. Holy crap, she was fast! I mean, she's no Flash, but still! “Aww, playing hard to get?” She stabbed at me with her umbrella.

I knocked it aside, but the brief contact sent an electric charge down my arm, numbing it. “Ahh!”

Still grinning, she got right up into my face. “I guess you could say I have a stunning effect on people!”

Now normally, a bad pun like that would make me groan. But being so close...wow. She was really cute under that face paint, and she even smelled nice. My skin felt hot, and my heart raced. God, I wanted her.

She reached out and placed her hand on my cheek, a look of wonder in her eyes. “You...I'm affecting you? But that's not...”

I came to my senses just then. She may be gorgeous, but she was a villain. And I'm a hero. I pushed her backwards. Instead of falling, though, she stayed on her feet in abject defiance of physics, twirling in what looked like a dance step.

She gave me a hurt look, then snarled. “Bitch! I hate you!” She aimed her umbrella at me, and a bolt of lightning came shooting at me!

Ultra Girl has a reputation for being invulnerable. This, of course, is due to the fact that my 'costume' is really just window dressing. I'm actually 'wearing' a skin-tight force field. I had been more shocked than anything when I touched her umbrella before, but now I was ready for it. The electricity didn't even make my hair stand on end.

“Hey, stop, that tickles!”

She bounded at me again. I tried to dodge, but just like before, she's a touch too fast for me. Instead of hitting me with the umbrella, she opted to simply punch me. The force knocked me back a few feet, even though it didn't really hurt. Great, she's strong too!

“You're making fun of me! You...I'll kill you!” Just then I realized she was crying. What...what was wrong with this girl?

First things first, though. I had to make sure the people here were safe, since this was bound to escalate. “You have to catch me first, Alice.”

I flew out of the restaurant, with her in hot pursuit.

“Get my name right! The White Rabbit! The White Rabbit!”

“Ok White, but just so you know, Jefferson Airplane called- they want their song back!”

For that wisecrack, I took another hit from her umbrella. I'm sure Lena would love to know what she's using to power that thing- she could make a cool billion off the technology. Unless...

Yes, it had to be. The umbrella must have a metal core, she's using it as a conductor. It doesn't have a power source...she's the power source!

Two police cruisers pull up as I lead her to an abandoned lot across the street. I hope the cops would have the good sense to stay out of this! I flew up a bit to get out of her reach. “Now White, don't you think we can talk about this?”

“Stop laughing at me!” She picked up a rock and tossed it at me. I moved out of the way, and quick- with her strength, she had to have a fastball that would put Nolan Ryan to shame!

“I wasn't...” Fuck. She wasn't listening to reason. “Look, I'm sorry, but you can't just rob people!”

“Why not?! Why should I care about them? They don't care about me! They think I'm a freak!”

“Uh..hey...you're not a freak.”

“That's easy for you to say! You're beautiful! They love you!” She leaped at me, and I was too stunned to even think to move. Not too many people can leap 20' in the air without a running start, you know!

She punched me in the jaw just as I said the first thing that came into my head. Gravity took over at that point. I hit the ground with a loud thud. She barely made a sound.

Next thing I know, she's on top of me, shaking me violently. “What did you say?! What did you say?!!”

“I...uh...just...that you're beautiful too!”

She stopped and gave me an odd look. She let go and moved close. “You're lying. You don't think that.”

“I do. I really do.”

She moved in real close, and her lips brushed against mine. An electric charge went through my body, and I'm not sure it was her powers! When I didn't resist, she kissed me harder, and I felt her tongue enter my mouth (it was kind of open at this point, I mean, I was completely floored by this girl- in more ways then one!). She touched my tongue with hers, and I couldn't help but moan a little.

She pulled away, her eyes glistening. “You...you're like me. You...like me?”

“Well, uh...yeah.” Oh come on! What would you have said?

She smiled again, and my God, it was the cutest smile ever. She opened her mouth to say something, but right about then, we got interrupted.

“Police! Freeze!”

She frowned. “Damn. I guess that's my cue.” She put her hand on my breast, and winked at me. “Until next time, baby!” She whirled and leaped right over the cops, giggling and laughing as she did. They turned to fire, but she was far too fast for them. “Callooh callay, oh frabjuous day!”

And then she was gone.

I managed to regain my composure and had just stood up when the cops turned to me. “Hey, you, don't move!”

I held up my hands. “Uh, hey now, I was just here to help...I wasn't robbing the place!”

“Uh huh, whatever kid. You just come with us.”

The other cop turned to his partner. “Wait a second, Jerry. She's the kid who rescued those people in Phoenix the other night.”

“What, really? Hey, is that true?”

I nodded. “Yessir.”

“Well hell. Ok fine. Get out of here. You'd just be more paperwork anyways.”

I told them about the other two losers before I went, and took off. In the comics, the police are usually pissed off about vigilantes, but from my experience, the real police are actually kind of happy to have the help. Either that, or they have a problem arresting cute young girls.

Take your pick.

I was famished by the time I got home, but thankfully Mom had made dinner for me, which I quickly devoured. I've said it before and I'll say it again. My Mom is the best.

I took a shower, but it didn't do anything to make me stop thinking about Rabbit. In fact, it just made me think about her more...I was pretty aroused by this point. I'm not going to go into details (I won't be sixteen for another two months, you know!), so, ah, let's just say I found a new use for the Orange Light.

I lay down on my bed, exhausted, but I couldn't stop thinking. About her. She's a thief. A bad person. But I just wanted to find out why she was hurting so much inside. Make it stop. I wanted to protect her.

Oh God. Was I really in love?

Chicago, Illinois

Doris had listened patiently to my story. There's something about Giganta that makes me let down my guard. I hadn't intended to tell her about my being Ultra Girl...but I did anyways. If Lena or Rena had been there, I probably wouldn't have, but it was just the two of us.

“...uh, so that's everything.”

She sighed. “Alena, seriously? I just don't understand, we're your friends, why wouldn't you let us help you?”

“Because...I didn't want them to come after you too. I know that sounds stupid, but the Green Lanterns think I'm dangerous!”

She nodded. “I...I guess you do have a point. But don't expect the others to agree. You are going to tell them, right?”

I bit my lower lip. “I...fuck. Now I have to, don't I? I can't expect you to keep secrets from the others.”

“Not forever, but at least for now, I can.” She reached out and took my hand, giving it a squeeze. “You're a very mature young woman, but you're not an adult. Not yet. You have to work a lot of things out for yourself, more so than a lot of people. Just remember that there are people who care.”

“Thanks Doris.”

“Anytime. Pheromones.”

“Wha?”

“Your White Rabbit. The way you reacted to her. I mean, I admit, it's possible to fall in love with someone in a short amount of time...I should know...but the physical reaction you had, it's very likely White Rabbit gives off very potent pheromones.”

“Huh. You know, now that you mention it, she did say something about being surprised she could affect me...”

Doris nodded. “It's likely they don't normally affect women.”

Oh fuck. “So what you're saying is, men fall all over her, but women don't?”

“Most likely, women feel threatened by her. We've come a long way, but it hasn't been that long, really, since we were animals.”

“And she's a lesbian.”

“It would seem that way. So quite probably, she sees her powers as a curse.”

“Yeah, but I am a girl, so why am I immune?”

“Your body is female, yes, but your brain isn't. It's still wired like a teenaged boy's.”

“Thank God for that.”

She laughed. “I don't know, it's kind of fun to flirt.”

“Gah!”

That just made her laugh more. “Sorry, I shouldn't tease you like that.”

I sighed. “It's okay. Reminds me of Alison.”

“How much does she know?”

I looked away. “I...I know how she'd react. She's always protected me, not the other way around. I don't know that she'd be too happy with me.”

“She's your sister, Alena. Look, your mother supports you. At least give Alison a chance. She might surprise you.”

“Yeah, right after she gives me a black eye. Doris...am I doing the wrong thing?”

“It's hard to say, hon. I know why you've made the choices you have, and believe me, if I thought I was putting Lena in danger, I'd probably try something drastic too. Of course, it's hard for me to keep a low profile. She'd find me eventually.”

“Yeah, she probably would. But what about Jade?”

She blew a lock of hair out of her eyes. “I don't know. She still seems like the old Jade, but I admit, she's changed in ways I don't even think she's aware of. She's become a lot more impulsive, that's for sure. Still, she's not your enemy, Alena.”

“I need to think. I...should go to London.”

“You should. But you can't stop thinking about that girl.”

“Gah! Get out of my head!”

She grinned at me. “Sorry. I know how you feel, I've been there. Although I am worried that she might be more than you can handle. It sounds like she's damaged goods, Alena. And you have a big heart. Just remember, you might not be able to save her.”

I nodded. “I know. But what can I do?”

She got up and hugged me. “Not much. We have to follow our hearts. But if she hurts you, I'll kick her into orbit.”

I wasn't sure if she could really do that, but it was nice to know that she cared. “Thanks. I think.”

She kissed the top of my hair. “Go on, get moving, before the girls get home.”

“Sure thing, Big Sister.”

She ruffled my hair, and the door opened. I turned invisible and phased out of the warehouse. I'd have to face the girls soon, but not today. I had a lot of other things to do.

If only I could get Rabbit out of my head long enough to do them!