Devilla

I stiffened within Nivera’s arms, unsure of how to respond. It wasn’t like my time with Lucy - I wasn’t panicking, or uncertain of the proper etiquette. I was just… feeling awkward, I suppose. Being held by a girl who’d proclaimed me to be family. A girl I hadn’t seen in 14 years… I wasn’t sure I had the same depth of emotion as her, the same joy at a friendship reclaimed. And yet I did wish to reclaim it. So, slowly and a little nervously, I wrapped my arms around her in turn.

“Great to see you hugging,” came a new voice from the now open doorway. “But you might wanna give her a little time, Niv. From what you’ve told me, Illa’s probably been too wrapped up in self-hatred to actually process her feelings about you up until this point - isn’t that right, Cuz?”

“Sorry,” Abigail said, coming in next. “She insisted on barging in…”

“Of course I did!” the newcomer - Chloe? - said. “I mean, no offense, but none of you are actually good at social stuff, are you? I figured there were even odds on whether they’d be hugging or strangling each other. And zero chance that they’d actually talk things out! ”

“Wait, what do you mean none of us?!” Abigail objected.

“I mean that you’re protesting for your own social skills instead of going to see how your friend’s doing,” Chloe pointed out. “And also none of your coworkers know anything about you. You’re kind of a big blank on the information network. Which is impressive! And concerning. Mostly concerning, since I don’t think you were going for that. But we can talk about that later! I’m pretty sure I’ve babbled enough to both befuddle my cousin and give her time to pull herself together! Two for one!”

“I’m not sure I’d really call myself put together,” I protested, shaking my head. Nevertheless, I couldn’t stop a small smile from curling up the corners of my lips.

Nivera, for her part, released me and slithered back a pace, turning around with her arms crossed in front of her. “I thought we agreed that you’d stay outside until Illa was ready for you?”

“No you didn’t. You just don’t want to admit that you were counting on my interruption, or that you’re glad I bailed you out because you went too fast and now you’re freaking out that Illa’s freaking out, even though she looks… Mostly fine?”

“I am fine,” I concurred. “If a little confused. I must admit, after nearly a decade and a half of trying to ignore my childhood, it’s rather hard to wrap my head around a happy reconciliation… or the fact that I have a cousin. I take it that’s you?”

“Wow, they really didn’t tell you anything about me, did they?” Chloe asked, frowning. “Let me guess - they basically ignored the Redbloods in your family?”

“I don’t think anyone really told me much of anything about my dam…” I confessed. “I’m vaguely aware that she was a soldier?”

“A popular one,” Abigail chimed in, catching me off guard. When I glanced at her, she shrugged. “I asked my Mom. She said the Smiling Soldier was a big deal back in her day.”

“Aunt Issa’s sorta my hero,” Chloe confided. “But we can talk about that later. Right now we’re supposed to be focusing on you and Niv!”

“I’m not really sure what remains to be focused on,” I admitted. “I feel like what I need most is time. Time to get to know her again - and you, for that matter.”

“Then say that!” Chloe replied. “I mean, you just did, I know, but imagine if you hadn’t? Niv would probably expect everything to just go back to the way things were! Now she knows it’s going to take time! That’s important.”

Niv… didn’t say anything, simply looking to the side. I did detect a faint blush on her cheeks, though.

“I… see. I suppose open communication is going to be an important part of this process, then…”

“Uh-huh! It’s a big part of most processes, in my experience! Including the whole ‘General Araina thinks you want to fire her, and also a mimic girl by the name of Mellany wants to cut a deal with you’ stuff! Which is probably what our next topic should be.”

“As much as I’d rather focus on the sudden existence of family in my life… I suppose business takes precedence…” I agreed. Only to be surprised when Chloe shook her head.

“Nah, family stuff is just better done over time. It’s like heating up stew on the stove - rushing it won’t get you anything but a cold meal and maybe an upset stomach! You gotta let it cook at its own pace. Besides, you’ve known me for like five seconds, and you already know I’m good at social situations and terrible at analogies! Give us an hour to discuss the problems plaguing you, and who knows what else you’ll discover?”

“That is a rather terrible simile…” I wondered if that ran in the family.

“Oooh, points for knowing your figures of speech!” Chloe declared, seemingly oddly happy. “But we’re getting off topic.”

“I’m not sure what to do on topic,” I admitted. “Politics are hardly my forte. If anything, I’m inclined to simply take your advice on the matter and hope for the best… 

“The advice of two people you hardly know?” Chloe pointed out. 

“The advice of two people who know better than me,” I replied in turn. “And whom I can only hope have my best interests at heart…”

“I’m pretty sure they do,” Abigail said. “I mean, Nivera hasn’t even scowled at you once since you started talking, and I didn’t even know she could hold those back. And Chloe… is a chaotic mess who I can’t read, but Bailey seemed to like her well enough. And she’s really good at reading people.”

“Bailey is?” I questioned, arching an eyebrow, before shaking my head. “No, I suppose that’s something to go over with her later. Right now, I’m more concerned with our plan going forward. Or the lack thereof, I suppose.”

“Well, Araina’s easy enough,” Chloe said. “You just need to give her reassurance. Lots of reassurance. Maybe some sort of guarantee for her job security?”

“Have Mellany promise to help with her public image,” Nivera suggested, before scowling. “Assuming we can actually work with her. I don’t trust her.”

“Usually I’d call you paranoid,” Chloe said, “but this time I actually agree. Mellany’s a back-stabbing bitch who’s literally selling her own grandma out of self-interest. But she’s also lazy, and not actually that ambitious… Far as I can tell, she mostly just wants power and influence so that she can afford to offload all her work onto other people. Tie her happiness to yours, and she’ll be content… in theory…”

“In theory,” Nivera emphasized. “In theory she’s also been following her Grandma’s orders willingly for her entire career. So either she’s still loyal to Alira and this is all some sort of weird trap, or she’s really good at faking loyalty. Not exactly inspiring ally material.”

“My suggestion?” Chloe offered. “Give her a figurehead position. Something cushy with no real power. It’s a symbolic end to the whole ‘you can’t work in the government’ stuff for her people, without putting too much power in her hands.”

“If that’s what you think is best,” I agreed, sending a rather helpless glance Abigail’s way. She, for her part, simply shrugged - no more certain of how to deal with this mess than I. Giving my head a quick shake to regain focus, I said, “I suppose it at least suffices for a preliminary plan. We’ll have to meet with both Mellany and Araina in person to truly make any decisions, though…”

“How about tomorrow?” Chloe suggested. “I can make the arrangements!”

“Tomorrow… might not be the best idea,” I said. “My journey should be reaching a milestone around that point.” Namely our destination. “Perhaps in two or three days?”

“Your journey?” Nivera queried. “What the hell sort of journey takes you multiple days? Where are you even going? The other side of the continent?”

I opened my mouth, wanting to claim that she overestimated my speed - only to realize that I, myself, wasn’t entirely sure how long such a trip would take me. Not because I hadn’t tested out my main flying speed - I’d done that during my search for salt - but because I wasn’t actually sure as to the size of the continent we were on… Or, for that matter, how my speed compared to a plane, which could cross the United States from end to end in a matter of hours. 

“I’m traveling with other people,” I divulged, in the end. “Human people, who are, as of yet, unaware of my identity.”

“Devilla?” Abigail questioned, arching an eyebrow. Though she didn’t say anything further, I knew she was questioning my decision to tell them so much. It was certainly a risk - despite Nivera’s claim that we were family, the truth remained that I knew little about her after so many years. But it wasn’t as if I could keep the truth hidden for long, if my plan to end the war was going to go anywhere… I needed more support within the tower. From people who actually knew what they were doing, and who didn’t hate me like Sylvanna…

I took a deep breath and asked, “What would you say if I said I was trying to end the war?”

“You trust people too easily,” Abigail groaned, holding her head in her hands while Nivera and Chloe exchanged glances.

“I’d say you’re a well-meaning idiot who’s going to get her heart broken when it explodes in your face,” Nivera declared after a moment.

“And I’d say your mom was a prophet,” Chloe informed me, drawing stares from not only me and Abigail, but also her fiancee. She shrugged in response, glancing at Nivera. “What? You’ve heard Mom when she gets drunk. She always said Grimmilla was a liar for claiming her daughter would end the war, but… well, here we are!”

“Are you sure she wasn’t just being a mom?” Abigail asked. “You know, like how my mom sometimes brags that I’m the best prostitute her brothel ever employed?”

“That does sound considerably more likely,” I agreed. “I hardly see how she could have known, after all. Not when I didn't even know, until… well, very recently.”

“Maybe,” Chloe conceded, with a shrug. “But I don’t think so. Mom said it’s how Queen Grimmilla convinced Aunt Issa to marry her… Or, more precisely, ‘how that bitch got her claws in your aunt.’ She’s not exactly a fan, by the way.”

“I suppose that extends to me as well, then. At least it would explain why she never reached out to me, even as a child…”

“You’d have to ask her about that,” Chloe replied. “I mean, I get the feeling there’s actually a bit more to it? Like there was a reason she couldn’t reach out to you… but it’s just a feeling. You won’t know if you don’t ask her.”

“Perhaps eventually,” I murmured, grimacing at the thought. “It certainly seems as if we’d have a lot to talk about. I’m meeting enough people with reason to despise me, as it is, though. I don’t particularly wish to deal with inherited grudges while I’m at it.”

“Well, if you want to know more about your mom’s little prophecy in the meantime, I guess I could at least ask about that?” Chloe offered. “I’m surprised she didn’t put anything in the Rite of Insight, though.”

I hesitated a moment, before shaking my head. “Perhaps she did. I wouldn’t know. I failed to cast the rite…”

“You what?!” Nivera demanded, her eyes widening. Her hands flew to her mouth a moment later, though. “I mean… uh… you messed it up?”

“Permanently, it would seem, since trying to recast it didn’t work… I messed up a word, and changed its nature in some manner. Instead of gaining the wisdom of my ancestors, I gained the memories of a past life - a life in another world. A world that had recorded media of a sort, one of  which showed a possible future of this world - and the potential end of me. A spoiled brat who got deposed by her own people.”

“So that’s why you changed!” Chloe said, snapping her fingers. “That makes way more sense than Abigail somehow putting you back together! No offense.”

“None taken,” Abigail replied. “I didn’t even know what sort of a mess she was until I met you two… she keeps that stuff bottled up too tight.”

“Wait, wait,” Nivera interrupted. “You have memories of another life? Does that mean you’re… not…”

“I’m still Devilla,” I assured her. “Though I can’t blame you for doubting it. Even I believed that I’d changed dramatically, for a brief while… but in truth, I’m still the spoiled brat I always was. I’m simply more aware of my faults, and of where they would lead me… I try to do better, of course, but not a day goes by where I don’t engage in some sort of selfish mistake…”

“...Yeah, you’re Illa, alright,” Nivera muttered, seemingly relieved. Then her eyes narrowed. “You’re not a selfish brat, though. You’re just someone who’s been hurt so badly she doesn’t know how to treat anyone around her.”

“Mistreatment of myself is hardly an excuse for mistreating others,” I protested, narrowing my own eyes. “It’s even worse now that I know better - now that I know what a healthy mentality is like, through the knowledge I inherited from past life memories… Despite everything, I still give into my selfish desires, still keep things secret out of fear. I’m trying to make up for my past, all the same, but I know full well that I’ll never escape it…”

“By secrets, you’re probably talking about the humans, right?” Chloe inferred. “The ones you haven’t spilled every detail to?”

“The very same,” I confirmed. “Lucy is someone I know from the past life memories I mentioned - someone who played a pivotal role in the recorded media I found. She was the one who brought an end to my reign and peace to demonkind. She believed in the goodness of everyone… except me. Of course, that was only in the game, where she’d heard nothing but terrible things about me from everyone involved… but I suppose it might have something to do with why I’m so reluctant to admit my identity, even knowing she would probably accept it…”

“I’m sorry,” Nivera said, holding up a hand. “But what the hell can one human do to bring about peace? Is she a princess, or something?”

“Not quite,” I replied, hesitating once again. I’d come so far, though. There seemed little point in not saying everything. “She’s the Heroine.”

Quiet reigned in the room for all of a second, and then, as one might expect, all hell broke loose.

***

It must have taken at least a quarter of an hour, in the end, for everything to calm down again. For Niv to be convinced that Lucy was truly different from previous Heroines. That my plan, which was admittedly ‘taped together by hope, optimism, and idiocy’ could work. Assuming I could get enough support among the demons… 

To that end, I had agreed to meet with General Sallina in two days' time. Prior to even my meeting with Araina and Mellany, as we would need to discuss how much to tell them. Perhaps, in the interim, I could figure out the right way to say that the Heroine had feelings for me… not to mention the fact that we'd already slept together many times. In fact, we likely would again tonight.

“You doing okay?” Abigail asked me, her tone conveying the worry her pitch black eyes failed to show. “Because you just suddenly started smiling and it's kinda creepy.”

“...I was, before you called the nature of my smile into question. I was only thinking about the warm embrace awaiting me back at the camp.”

“Right… maybe don't swap between frowning and smiling like that in front of Lucy? I don't know about her, but it always sends chills down my spine.”

“...Noted,” I grumbled, taking a moment to study my appearance in a nearby mirror to ensure that the hair dye had properly settled, before moving towards the teleportation circle. “I'll see you in the morning, Abigail. For breakfast.”

“Not going to take any dinner with you?” She asked me, arching an eyebrow. “Maybe dessert?”

“I figured I'd take out a few meals from my bag,” I informed her, a small smile on my lips. “I haven't finished teaching them the wonders of the potatoes, after all. I think a burger with fries and hot dipping sauce might be just the thing to win them over to its charms.”

“Alright. Have fun.” 

She waved goodbye, a gesture I returned as I placed my feet upon the teleportation circle, and a moment later I was standing in the woods. A few seconds more and I had four steaming plates in hand, ready to serve to Lucy and the rest.

Of course, as good as they might have looked and even smelt, they distracted Lucy for no more than a second before her eyes turned to me and a smile lit her face. “So how did it go?”

“Decently,” I confessed, placing a plate on the ground in front of Bailey and handing another to Feyra, who took a fry and sniffed at it. Lucy’s was second to last last, with me of course taking the final plate. “Forget forgiving me, Nivera… Niv… Even went so far as to call me family… A word I never thought would apply to me again.”

A look of sadness briefly flickered across Lucy’s face at my words. It only lasted for a moment, though, before she came up beside me and wrapped an arm about my torso. 

“I’m glad it worked out for you!” she said, squeezing me tight. “Why don’t you tell me all about it while we eat?”

“I’m not sure how much there is to tell,”  I confessed, finding a place to sit down upon the ground, the plate of food in my lap. Lucy, of course, settled next to me, close enough for her thigh to touch my own. “When she first came in, she wasn’t even saying anything…. Then, next thing I knew, a tirade of words was coming from her mouth! Suddenly…”’

I faltered for a moment as Lucy’s hand slid over to grab one of mine. Only for a moment, though, before I continued my story. Hand in hand with the one girl who could save my species, a plate of hot food on my lap, and a smile on my lips, I shared my day. Though Lucy didn’t say a word, the smile on her face was all I needed to know she understood.

~~~

Author's Notes

Hope nobody minds me skipping the conversation about how Lucy is Different. We’ve had it several times already, and I figured nobody needed to see it yet again. The only thing you really missed is Nivera struggling between the desire to be supportive/treat her newly-restored little sis gently, and her desire to call the plan out as idiocy and rant about how Devilla has no clue what she’s doing.

I hope you enjoyed the chapter. It’s a bit of an awkward one, in my eyes, but I’m hoping it doesn’t translate over to the reading experience. (I’m not used to writing so many characters in one scene. And then there were the Reveals on both Devilla and Chloe’s part – but they seemed in character? Devilla shares way too easily when she’s not panicked about the other person hating her! And Chloe…. casually dropping a bomb like that feels very on brand. Especially when it drew attention away from Devilla at a moment where she maybe needed it.)

On another note, being recognized by self-hating tendencies you’ve had since childhood is ow… But hey, it works? Nivera’s convinced! Yay…

Thanks, as always, to FallingLeaf for proofreading, and Lulla for beta reading!

PS: I'm taking a (very) short break right now. It's been a struggle to write lately, and I don't want to risk getting burnt out… (I'm planning on, like, 3 days at the max. It might lead to a break week in the scheduled releases, since I haven't finished chapter 42 yet... I'm hoping not, but I really need to stop pushing myself before I make things worse. The pre-proofreading version of 41 is still on Patreon for those who want early access, though! And I'm hoping 42 will follow before too much longer.)