Stephanie’s Deal by Jennifer Brock Last year, Steven Brooks was a sad, lonely eleven-year-old boy who’d rather spend time in worlds of his own imagining than to have to face the real world. His parents only cared about grades, and his sister was a jerk. He was hoping to get a videogame for Christmas that would allow him to escape even further, and took a risk to peek inside his mother’s closet, which turned out to be the worst and best thing Steven ever did. He got caught, and his punishment (for weird reasons related to his sister teasing him about a crazy pageant) was to dress and live as a girl for the duration of his school break. Since then, Stephanie’s eyes have been opened to a better world with friends and a loving family and plenty of reasons to smile. In this installment, her doctor has some interesting news, and her secret is revealed to significant people. (It’s a supersized one to make up for taking so long between chapters.)

Episode 20

Monday was a busy day for phone calls at Stephanie’s house. In the middle of the morning, her therapist called. She said a few words to Mom, but then she wanted Stephanie to get on the extension. She was calling to ask permission to show Stephanie’s artwork to a friend of hers, an art expert. The doctor made it clear that none of the details of her identity would be revealed; she just wanted an opinion on some of the aspects of the things Stephanie had made. Mom wasn’t sure, but Stephanie thought it was okay, so they gave Dr. Howard the go ahead.

In the early afternoon, Robin called just after school, to return the call Stephanie had made on Saturday. She was really happy, even though she’d had to pretend to be Bobby at school. She’d gotten this really cool doctor who understood everything, and they’d made a deal that she could change into her girl clothes as soon as she got off the school bus, every day. She had to be a boy on Sundays for church and stuff, but all day Saturday was girl time!

Stephanie was glad for her friend. She was really relieved that her dad had come around. Robin said that he was still a little upset, but her doctor was helping with that. The other deal they’d made was that when school was out (which felt like forever but was only like five months away), she could spend the whole summer as Robin, and if she was still sure she wanted to be a girl in the fall, Dr Howard would sign some form that would let her become Robin in school. Stephanie was a little surprised that they had the same doctor, but didn’t mention it. Robin did say that Stephanie’s dad had helped them find her, so that kind of made sense. It also gave her hope that maybe she could work out some kind of similar arrangement.

She could hear the smile in Robin’s voice, even over the phone, and she had to smile herself. It wasn’t that long ago that Robin had become miserable and depressed when her father had tried to turn her back into a boy forever. Stephanie really hoped he was seriously trying to accept her now, and not just faking it. It made her think about how supportive her own family was being about the whole thing.

Not long after Robin said goodbye, her phone rang again. This time it was Debbie. She called to see if Stephanie wanted to go shopping with her at the mall on Wednesday. Her mom was getting her some new clothes for spring, and it was always fun to have a friend along to lend an opinion about what looked good, since even though her mother had great fashion sense, she was still a grownup.

Stephanie thought that sounded like fun, but she had to turn down the invitation; Wednesday was her dance class. Debbie asked what kind of class it was, and Stephanie said it was ballroom dancing to get ready for her cousin’s wedding. She thought she’d mentioned the wedding before, but Debbie was all confused and pressed her for more details. She started at the beginning and explained that she’d actually volunteered to serve as a junior bridesmaid back at Christmas, before she was planning on being a girl full-time, and it just kind of worked out.

Debbie started gushing about how lucky Stephanie was to get to be in a wedding party, and that she was so jealous! Stephanie couldn’t answer a lot of her questions about what kind of dress she’d be wearing, or where the church was or anything, but she was able to describe her dance partner for Debbie. She started by telling her that Christopher was a pain in the butt and a major jerk, but she wanted a more visual description, like how tall he was and stuff.

Stephanie told her that unlike Andrea, the bridesmaid paired with her cousin Dan, who was much shorter than her dance partner, she didn’t complain at the end of every class that she had a stiff neck from looking up. Christopher was just tall enough so that she only had to tilt her chin a little to meet his eyes even when she was in her heels. For some reason, Stephanie felt herself blushing when thinking about his eyes, and tried to change the subject to just talk about the rest of the wedding party.

Debbie was cool with that and eventually she remembered why she’d called, and went to go check with her mother, then asked if Stephanie would be able to make it if they moved the shopping to Friday. Stephanie realized she should probably check with her mother as well, and made Debbie wait this time while she checked. Mom said it sounded okay, but then the girls had to pass their phones over so the mothers could finalize the details. Mom hung up before giving Stephanie her phone back, so she didn’t even get to say goodbye, but she was glad she’d get to go hang out at the mall with her girlfriend. It made her feel like she was somehow more authentic, since magazines and TV and stuff made it seem like all that real teenage girls ever did for fun was go shopping together.

Brian called Stephanie after dinner and she took her phone up to her room. She got a happy squishy feeling inside when he said he missed her. She pretended to kiss him through the phone and he played along with it and talked about lately strawberry had become his favorite flavor. He described running his fingers through her hair and smelling her perfume, and she didn’t want to correct him that the only thing he’d be smelling in her hair was shampoo. It was just too cute.

She said that it was too bad that it would be almost a whole week before she could see him again, but that she was really looking forward to his Super Bowl party. Would they be able to sneak away for a few private kisses at some point? She warned him that in front of other people, he’d only be getting quick pecks with her mouth closed and her lips tightly puckered; no tongues. If those were her rules, he said he’d definitely find a way to get her alone to hold her tight and share some of their favorite kind of kisses. He also said some things about running his hands along her body that made her really scared and nervous, yet very curious at the same time. She closed her eyes and let her own hands drift across her dress, wondering what it would feel like if she let her boyfriend do that.

She had to snap out of her reverie when Brian’s father suddenly came on the line and said he wanted to talk to her Dad. She took a moment to check her hair and makeup in the mirror, and then went to find him. She handed him her phone and then stuck around trying to figure out what they were talking about. At least he was smiling, which was kind of a good thing. He said that something sounded like a good idea; that due to their unusual circumstances he hadn’t really gotten a chance to get to know Brian before he started seeing his daughter, since he hadn’t realized at the time that she truly was his daughter. He said that something else shouldn’t take that long and he’d be happy to do it.

At least unlike Mom he didn’t hang up before giving her back the phone. She got to say goodbye to her boyfriend. She said she’d see him on Sunday, and he said he could hardly wait, and called her “Cutie.” She was smiling inside and out when she closed the phone and didn’t hear what her Dad said. When he repeated it, her heart started panicking. Her father had gotten invited to Brian’s Super Bowl party, too! She’d have to figure out how to steal kisses from her boyfriend in front of him! She put on a fake smile and said that it was great they’d get to spend some time together, and then rushed back to her room to try to calm down.

She couldn’t quite figure out what was bothering her about it, until she remembered seeing how scary Dad used to get back when her sister Michelle was younger, any time she’d brought a boy home. It’s like he shifted from his private family personality to his serious lawyerly courtroom self. He could be very intimidating when he wanted to be, and if he thought some young buck wasn’t good enough for “his little girl,” he’d turn it up to full. Many of the guys who’d tried to date Michelle had changed their minds after meeting Dad. Stephanie worried that Brian might do the same — she already had a few shortcomings as a girl and didn’t want an overprotective father to turn out to be the last straw that made him give up on her.

She avoided her parents for the rest of the night and went to bed still feeling kind of anxious. She took her time rubbing the tea tree oil into her chest at bedtime, and tried to consciously will her breasts into sprouting. She wanted to have something that Brian would want to try to touch, even if she wasn’t sure if she was ready to allow him to. But if her Dad did get all super-scary on Brian and he didn’t dump her for it, he might end up deserving some kind of reward. She’d have to think about it.

For her therapy session on Tuesday, Stephanie wanted to dress a little more casually than the last time so the doctor wouldn’t think she was trying too hard, but still look girlish. The weather wasn’t quite as cold so she was able to get away with wearing her pink lace-trimmed t-shirt top under her white cardigan sweater, paired with her denim skirt and ribbed white tights and her black patent Mary Janes on her feet.

Since the doctor had already seen her pink jewelry, she wore her set with the silver stars, and added her charm bracelet since it had brought her good luck the last time. She put a little pink sparkly gloss on her lips and just enough of her brown mascara on her lashes to call attention to her eyes. Figuring out how to do her hair was always the hardest part. She finally settled on clipping it back with a barrette on each side and then teasing it out in the back to fluff out.

She threw her things in her black patent handbag and she was ready to go. But her appointment was several hours away, so she had to kill some time. She did a little internet surfing, and then read one of her sister’s old books for a while. It seemed like forever before Mom said it was time to go. Stephanie freshened up her lip gloss before fetching her coat and getting into the car. Mom kind of looked at her funny, since it was the first time Stephanie was in a good mood when going to see Dr. Howard.

After they were shown into the doctor’s office and she had them sit down, she reached behind her desk and returned Stephanie’s box of artwork. She gave it a quick peek, but didn’t check completely to see if everything was there. She trusted the doctor.

So it came as a shock when Dr. Howard opened a folder on her desk and showed a page from one of Stephanie’s comic books, with some red marks all over it. She stood up and was prepared to shout at her when the doctor said that she’d shown photocopies of Stephanie’s drawings to an artist friend of hers who pointed out some interesting things she hadn’t noticed. Stephanie felt extremely embarrassed and sat back down before asking what she found.

Dr Howard turned toward Mom. “You really should read this if you get a chance. Your child is very talented. The storyline is a variation on the standard hero’s quest, where a lone traveler goes exploring in a strange world and encounters all kinds of unusual characters. What does make this one unusual is that unlike, say, Harry Potter or Flash Gordon, the hero here doesn’t hang onto any of these new friends. In most of these issues, the main character comes alone, meets some interesting people, has a bit of adventure with them, and in the end goes on again alone. I think that structure shows how truly lonely our author here was, or maybe even still is.”

She looked at Stephanie. “You have said that you feel more friendly now than you did when you wrote this, and you’ve said that you think it’s because you’re in girls’ clothes. There might be a hint of that in here, too. But before I show you, I want you to know that even the things written by adults are derivative at times, so don’t take this as criticism of your technique. Many of the people your Sam meets are familiar archetypes, like a witch or a musketeer. But what my friend showed me was that many of those archetypes all seem to incorporate the same kind of ambiguous gender as your protagonist. She said it looked like you probably used reference pictures for some of your drawings, which isn’t a bad thing; a lot of professionals draw that way.”

She showed them a pair of pictures. On the left was Stephanie’s drawing, and on the right was a painting by someone else, but they both showed an armored knight sitting on a horse. “Now this character is Sir Gideon, and he’s clearly described as male, but Cheyenne pointed out to me that your reference for this drawing was a historical painting she’d recognized of Joan of Arc, who was famous for cross-dressing in a man’s armor.”

She showed another pair of images. “And this elfin woman here is a sort of Robin Hood like forest dweller named Arbora. She’s very definitely female, almost overtly sexualized. But here the reference seems to be from a vintage photo of Mary Martin as Peter Pan on Broadway, a woman famous for pretending to be a man.”

“There were some others, too.” She pulled another picture out, but this time didn’t have a reference for comparison. “Here is a gathering of clearly male wizards with long beards, and I hadn’t realized that these fancy magical robes they’re wearing are really only slightly altered images of ballgowns. Stevie did a pretty good job at turning the dresses into more masculine figures, and it was only when Cheyenne showed me that the one on this guy here in the back seems to have an Empire waist that we realized where these fashions came from. It’s very impressive work!”

“So, what’s got me wondering is whether you did this intentionally or not. Do you remember how you chose your reference pictures?”

Stephanie shrugged. “I just Googled for photos of stuff. I forget how I found each of those. I don’t think I was looking for women or men or whatever.”

“So your way of designing characters in a sense ignored gender?” The doctor wrote something in her notepad. “Interesting. There just might have been clues that you had doubts about your own sexual identity before this year. There’s a danger of misinterpreting things through the lens of hindsight, so we have to be careful, but I think in this case it’s legitimate.”

Stephanie couldn’t hold it in any longer. “Does this mean you’re going to send me to the doctors with operations and hormones and stuff to turn me into a girl for real forever and always?” She was almost too excited, and Mom shot her a stern look.

Dr. Howard frowned. “Now I didn’t say that. I think we still need some time to understand exactly what’s going on for you. First of all, the current standards in this country don’t allow sexual reassignment surgery to be performed on a minor, so put that option out of your mind completely. Second, I’ve talked to endocrinologists, and they prefer not to start someone your age on hormone replacement therapy. Again, the standards want them to wait until the patient is an adult. What they are allowed to do to a younger patient is give them hormones to delay puberty. But even in that case, you’re still a little young. Sexual development is related to general development, and you’re around the age where girls are taller than boys, so if they blocked you now you could end up stunted. Ideally we’d want your boy hormones to make you grow a little more before they turned them off, and it should be well before they made you too hairy and muscularly manly. And in the meanwhile that gives us time to make sure. We’re talking about making permanent, irreversible changes to your body, so it shouldn’t be done on a whim.”

Stephanie was confused. “But I don’t want to be a boy anymore! Even if you make me dress in boy clothes I’ll be a girl in boy clothes. Even if I still have to have boy parts, I’ll know I’m a girl, and as soon as I’m old enough I’ll get one of those doctors to give me girl parts.”

Mom just stared with her eyes as big as possible, but Dr. Howard just kind of laughed. “I understand your conviction is strong. I’m not going to try to push you one way or the other. I’d just like you to do the same, and not try to push yourself one way or the other. It’s okay for you to explore femininity; just don’t jump into it with both feet. Wade in slowly before you get in over your head, as it were.”

Stephanie still wasn’t satisfied. “Robin said there’s a form you can sign to let her go to school as a girl. Can you do that for me?”

“While I can’t really discuss what I may or may not have said to someone who might be another patient, it is indeed within my power to write a letter to whatever school system you end up in, if we’re really certain you’re gender dysphoric. But speaking of schools, there was something else I wanted to bring up with you. The friend I showed your work to is actually an art teacher at the Hutchinson School. She thinks you’d definitely qualify for their arts program, if you’re interested.”

Stephanie didn’t know what that meant, but Mom seemed to recognize the name. “I hadn’t even been thinking about them as an option, but I guess it makes sense. Do I need to drop any particular name to make an appointment to talk with an admissions officer?”

Dr. Howard handed her a business card. “Call Ruth Lancaster at this number. Give her your name. She should be expecting a call, but if she doesn’t you can tell her that Cheyenne Lucas recommended your daughter for placement.”

The adults were caught up in school details, and Stephanie was mostly tuning them out, but she perked up at hearing a magic word. “Daughter? So you mean I’ll get to go to this school as a girl?”

She smiled at her patient. “They have a very liberal policy toward LGBT students, so I doubt you’d even need my permission, but yes, I think it would be fine to allow you to present as female. Consider it a trial run. If you decide to attend their school, we could let you spend the next five months or so as a full-time female, which should also get you through your cousin’s wedding that you’ve committed to a playing a female role in. Come the summer we can reevaluate, and if you decide to change your mind, that would be okay. I imagine that a place like Hutchinson wouldn’t even blink if a student switched genders over the summer. If instead you’re certain then that the right course for you is to go forward as a female, I’ll refer you to an endocrinologist and they can see about preventing you having a male puberty. Does that sound fair?”

Stephanie thought it sounded too slow, but anything that didn’t make her have to turn back into a boy sounded like a good idea. She nodded.

Mom seemed a little upset, though. The doctor looked at her. “Carol, does that seem like a reasonable compromise to you?”

“I’m feeling a little blindsided here. I didn’t expect you to just flat out tell my, um, child here that you approve of h-her changing sex without making sure I agreed first. But I guess I can’t say no now.”

“At this point we’re only talking about changing Stevie’s gender presentation, not about making any actual body changes. I think that’s the best way to go for now. It will also give you some time to adjust. Some part of you probably still sees the situation as your son playing dress-up, but she seems fairly emphatic here about actually being your daughter. So give her some room to experiment with what that means, and when the time comes for any really irreversible decisions it will be less traumatic for everyone involved.”

Mom sighed. “I guess it’s for the best. Tom and I talked about it being a very real possibility.” They spent the rest of the session going over Stephanie’s feelings and a few of Mom’s anxieties, and when their time was up everyone was in a generally better mood.

When they got home, Mom called and got them an appointment with Ms. Lancaster for the next day. Stephanie could hardly believe it — she was going to get to go to school as a girl! It took all her willpower to keep from celebrating too soon. It wasn’t real quite yet. Until some principal or teacher or something told her that she was enrolled in a new school as Stephanie, there was still a chance Steven would be going back to school somewhere. She went through the rest of the afternoon in that “not wanting to wake up and find out it’s a dream” feeling.

When Dad came home, Mom got to him first and shared the news. He said that Hutchinson was a bit on the “crunchy granola” side, but their academic credentials were sound, and if Stephanie really did have talent as an artist maybe it was the right place for her. Talking about her artwork made him want to see it, so Stephanie had to get out her box and let her parents read her comic books. It was way too embarrassing for her to watch, so she made them wait until she left the room to open the box.

A while later there was a knock on her bedroom door, and her Dad was stopping by to tell her how impressed he was with her work, and wished she’d shown it to him sooner. He asked how she felt about going to a new school and she told him she was a little nervous about being in a new place and everything, but that it she was really happy that she’d get to be herself. He nodded as though he understood what she meant, but she wasn’t sure if he was just faking it. He gave her a hug and wished her luck at her meeting.

Stephanie had a very weird dream that night. She was back in her old classroom, wearing just her bra and panties, and everyone pointed and laughed and called her “Steven the Sissy!” She cried that she was a real girl, but they ripped her clothes off and instead of being naked she was blank underneath like a Barbie doll. It was a relief to not be a boy, but frustrating to not be a girl either.

She didn’t have a lot of time to think about what it might mean because Mom came and got her out of bed early, even though their appointment wasn’t until 10:00. She wanted to make sure they made a good impression at the school. She even picked out what she wanted Stephanie to wear. She put her in a crisp white blouse and gray wool skirt, and her blue cardigan sweater, like she was going to church or something. She even only let her put on her simplest jewelry, just a chain necklace and her silver star stud earrings. Stephanie had to sneak some lip gloss.

Mom looked nice, but also kind of churchy or business-y. She was in a black skirt suit and a white blouse and she was barely wearing lipstick. It was like she wanted to seem as stuffy as possible for this meeting. Stephanie was curious, but sensed that Mom wasn’t in a mood to explain. She just kept her mouth shut and sat still as they drove.

The school was only one town away, so it wasn’t too far to go, but it still seemed like a foreign country almost. Stephanie hadn’t gone over there very much. It did seem like maybe there were more rich people. The houses looked a little more expensive, and the cars were fancier.

Eventually, Mom pulled into a driveway that was marked with a big sign identifying it as The Hutchinson School. The cars in the parking lot had more bumper stickers than Stephanie had ever seen before, advertising various politicians and some things she guessed were rock bands. The school itself was a cluster of wide, low brick buildings, and Mom found a label that identified which one to go to for the main office. Stephanie wanted to take her time to look around along the way, but Mom hurried her along.

They found a receptionist desk and she gave their names and said they had an appointment with Ms. Lancaster. The lady behind the desk picked up a phone and hit some buttons, and then said that the Brookses were there.

Ms. Lancaster turned out to be a friendly-looking lady not much older than Mom, but way more colorful. Her dress was printed with all kinds of flowers all over, and she had a big, chunky necklace of alternating square and round beads where no two were the same color. She showed them into her office, and gave them each a brochure about the school. “Our founder, Phoebe Hutchinson, took elements that from Waldorf, Montessori, and some experimental charter schools and combined them into a new concept. Our programs here emphasize focusing on each student’s complete development, including art and music and civics and philosophy as well as language and arithmetic. Ms. Lucas has already noted your considerable aptitude for art, and we’d like to help nurture that, but not to the exclusion of all other studies. Did you bring a transcript from your previous school?”

Mom pulled a folder out of her bag, but before she handed it over she asked, “Now you were told that she’s really a boy, right?” Stephanie winced at her phrasing but she didn’t seem to notice. Ms. Lancaster nodded. Mom passed the papers over, and continued, “So here’s Steven’s file from Roosevelt.”

Ms. Lancaster paged through the file. “There are a few notes here on behavioral issues, but those wouldn’t prevent us from admitting Stephanie as a student. In fact, I’d cite them as evidence of how the public school system has failed you. It mentions how you appeared bored and inattentive in class, but since it didn’t disrupt the other students nothing was done about it. Well, to me, that indicates that the material wasn’t engaging your interest. Here we have the resources to individually tailor each student’s curriculum; we don’t treat them like sheep or try to churn out rows of identical robots all thinking alike. Our students come to us as unique individuals, and remain as such even when they leave us. Unlike the public schools, our goal is not to beat them all into conformity. We want to help them learn to actually use their brains to understand things, not just spend energy on rote memorization.”

Stephanie didn’t completely get all of that, but Mom seemed to like what she was saying. “That sounds like a noble goal, but do the students still get a good education? Public schools may do a lot of drilling information into kids’ heads, but that’s what they need to do to score well on the SAT’s and get into college.”

“While it’s true that a student who puts in hours of learning vocabulary words just to learn them can do better on standardized tests, what we do here is teach how the students how to use their minds to grow in knowledge. Like we don’t teach just algebra so they know algebra, but present algebra for what it truly is, a useful tool for solving certain kinds of problems. At no point do our students make that age-old complaint, ‘Why do we need to know this stuff?’ We’re a K through twelve facility, and it is true that we do better when a child starts with us at a younger age. A preschooler’s favorite question is ‘Why’ and we try to harness that curiosity and keep it alive throughout their lives. When a child like yours starts with us at an older age, there’s an adjustment period at first where we work together to get their brains wondering and exploring again instead of just repeating back what’s told to them. We turn out critical thinkers, not zombies. So while they may not turn out the best scores on fact tests, they do outstanding on applied knowledge tests, and generally perform overwhelmingly well at essay tests. Our graduates have gone on to every one of the Ivy League colleges, and probably every prestigious institution you could name, but I really prefer to remember the students who chose places to further their education for reasons beyond just getting an impressive diploma. With what we’ve taught them, our graduates are able to obtain a quality education wherever they go. All of life presents opportunities to learn knew things.”

Stephanie thought that sounded a lot better than her old school. She wanted Mom to just say yes or whatever it took to let her start coming there.

But her mother wasn’t done asking questions. “And you’re sure there wouldn’t be a problem with her, um, gender situation?”

“Not at all. We’ve had other transgender students before her, even some who transitioned while attending. Our students are encouraged to explore how they see their place in the world, and that includes things like self-expression and sexuality. There is occasionally some mild teasing, but we strive to show the students that respecting their fellow beings is of utmost importance. We haven’t had any incidents of serious bullying, even though we don’t have any foolish ‘Zero Tolerance’ policies. Intolerance isn’t a quality we want to foster in our students, and therefore not one we want to demonstrate in ourselves. When students have problems with each other, we provide a forum for them to understand and resolve their differences.”

“What about practical things? Like, will she be allowed to use the girls’ bathroom and locker room? Will her classmates need to be informed of her true sex?”

“To answer your first question, there are no girls’ bathrooms. All our lavatories are unisex, with full privacy partition walls and doors that go completely to the floor, and separate wastebaskets in each stall, so no one need be embarrassed. Stephanie would be sharing a locker room with other girls at gym class, but again we have individual changing booths with privacy curtains. It isn’t just girls like her who have body issues. No one has to feel insecure about being seen and compared to her or his peers. After all, she isn’t the only girl here who pads her bra.” Ms. Lancaster chuckled a little, and Stephanie tried not to blush.

“As for your second question, Stephanie’s classmates would not be told anything about her other than one she chooses to share personally. Her teachers would not even be told of her gender status, except when relevant, like in PE. Only the administration and health staff, the nurse and counselors, would be aware of her nature, in order to look out for any problems she may be having because of it.”

It all sounded really good. Ms. Lancaster took them on a brief tour. First they checked out the library, which was this huge, two-story space surrounded by bookshelves, with skylights in the ceiling and chairs and tables for little kids and big kids mixed together, and even some big soft pillows for comfortable reading. They went on to look at the big empty cafeteria and the big empty auditorium.

Then she showed them a couple of classrooms. In the first one they were discussing something about the American Revolution. There were fewer students in the class than at her old school, and the teacher had a special map up on a big computer screen where the blackboard would be. The kids could touch it and move stuff around, and zoom in an out or zip across the ocean just like that. It was pretty cool.

What really got Stephanie excited was an art class. There was a table in the middle with a spotlight shining on a bowl of fruit, and students were arranged at tilted desks all around it, so they could draw. On a counter on the side of the room were stacks of all different kinds of papers, and buckets of pencils in different colors and sizes, and they could just grab what they needed. The teacher was sitting off to the side, and she’d only come look at someone’s picture if they called him over. The best part was that the pictures were all different — one girl’s looked almost real enough to be a photo, but this one boy was taking the shapes of the fruits and turning them into creepy monsters, and another girl was drawing the fruit, but her bowl was invisible, so they were just sort of hovering in space. She also made all the fruits the wrong colors, but it still made a pretty drawing.

The teacher came over and shook her hand. “Hi, I’m Cheyenne Lucas. You must be Stephanie. When I saw your drawings, I told Ruth that we had to get you for our program. I hope you decide to enroll here. I’m looking forward to seeing what other feats of creativity you could perform with a little guidance.”

Stephanie smiled. “Thank you. I think I’d like it here.”

They went back to the office, and Mom said she liked what she’d seen and was ready to go ahead with signing her up, but she’d need to discuss it with her husband first. Ms. Lancaster gave her a form to take home and said she hoped to see them again.

Mom called Dad from the car to tell him that the meeting went great. The tuition was around what they’d expected, and she was sure they could budget it, but she wanted him to look over the documents before she signed anything. They decided to drive to his office instead of back home, and he could meet them for lunch, and then look over the papers and make sure there weren’t any problem clauses in the contract.

Stephanie was too nervous to eat a lot at lunch, so she just ordered a salad and ended up only picking at it a little. Afterwards, Stephanie had to hang out in the waiting room at his office while Dad and Mom looked over the papers the school had given her and talked over their decision.

After what seemed like way too long, they finally came out and got her. Dad was smiling broadly, and swept her up in a hug. “Congratulations, Honey! Starting Monday, you’ll be a Hutchinson student. We talked it over and decided it was the best option for you, and then faxed over the application. I’ll drop off a check later, and then we’re all set. They want you to go back on Friday to take some tests just to figure out which classes to place you in, but it’s nothing you need to worry about. They just need to know what you know and what you’ve still got left to learn. No matter how you score they won’t reject you or anything since your application has already been accepted.”

She was overjoyed, and even did that little squealing, screaming thing that she’d seen girls do when they were excited, but had never understood why before. She was all happy and nervous and scared, but it was a good scared, curious about what it would be like going to a new school. She spent the rest of the afternoon pretty much in a cloud.

Stephanie had a dance class that night, so she changed before dinner into her pretty light blue dress that had a sash that her mother had to tie in the back, and got to wear real grownup pantyhose and her navy blue pumps. Mom helped her with her hair and makeup and made her wear an apron when they cooked dinner. Dad said she looked pretty, and was on her way to becoming a lovely young woman. Stephanie blushed at that and worried that maybe she’d overdone her look. Or it could have been her happiness showing through at knowing she’d be a girl every day from now on.

Dan and Matt both told her she looked nice when they came to pick her up, and Dan even made a little whistle. She got compliments from the other bridesmaids, too. Christopher even seemed a little impressed, and said he liked her dress. She said it was a gift from his sister. He was even extra polite when he asked her to dance.

The Maestro singled out his “Princessa” as usual, and Stephanie decided to just bask in all the attention. She was a girl; she liked being seen as pretty, and it was nice to know her efforts at trying to look good weren’t being wasted. She didn’t make any mistakes with the dance steps, and kept her good mood all the way through class.

Shelby asked Matt if she could drive Stephanie home instead, since she wanted to ask her parents about letting her babysit. Matt just shrugged it off and made sure it was okay with Stephanie before walking off.

Shelby’s car was cool. It was this neat little two-door hatchback with a space-age motor that could switch between gas and electricity. It was a little messy, with a few pieces of junk mail thrown on the floor, and some toys scattered around the back seat, but it wasn’t dirty or smelly or anything.

Stephanie told Shelby her address and she said she had a pretty good idea how to get there. When they’d gone a couple blocks, Stephanie said, “I’d really love to watch Tara for you some time. She really is a great girl!” She paused and took a deep breath. “But before you leave her alone with me you probably ought to know that up until last Christmas I was a boy.”

Shelby ground the car to a stop. “No way! You’ve got to be kidding me. Did Grace put you up to this? We’re always playing tricks on each other.”

Stephanie slowly explained the whole story to her, how the pageant had the boys playing girls’ parts and girls playing boys, and Michelle had teased her brother, and then Steven had looked in the closet, and the punishment was become a girl or lose his video game, and so Stephanie was born, and then she got asked to fill a spot in the wedding party, and then the school burned down, and somewhere along the way she realized she was supposed to be a girl all along, and just that day they’d enrolled her in a new school as a girl.

Shelby just sat there with her eyes widened. It was so unbelievable, yet Stephanie seemed so sincere. She scanned Stephanie’s face, trying to find some evidence of maleness lurking beneath the surface but it just wasn’t there. “I appreciate your honesty. I would still love for you to babysit for me some time, and I promise I won’t tell anyone your secret.” She bit her lip. “Um, but actually, I wanted to take you home for a different reason, but I didn’t want Grace to know.”

Stephanie got really embarrassed. She’d revealed her special situation to Shelby even though she really hadn’t needed to. She tried to smile anyway. “So what’s the real reason?”

“It’s going to seem like such a letdown after all that, but I wanted to ask your parents if I could take you to a movie. Maybe you’ve seen the ads — this movie, 27 Dresses, came out a few weeks ago. It’s about a girl who’s been a bridesmaid for all her friends without getting a wedding of her own, and so how perfect would that be if we could get all the bridesmaids in our wedding party together and go see it next Saturday, as a surprise for Grace, sort of an unofficial pre-bachelorette party? Well, anyway, it would be great if you could come with us, but it’s a PG-13, so I thought I’d better clear it with your folks. But especially since you shared your trans-gendered nature before accepting a babysitting job, I can tell you’re mature enough for a movie with a few naughty words in it, so I’m sure your parents couldn’t possibly object.”

She was right. Once Shelby explained her plan about the movie, Stephanie’s Mom and Dad said it was fine. They even okayed letting Stephanie babysit Tara at some indefinite point in the future, and were definitely impressed when Shelby told them Stephanie was honest with her about her gender. They were really starting to see their daughter in a new light.

(Thanks to Owd Bob for some superb proofreading!)