Change the subject, Rhodes.

“This is a nice place, Paula”

“It should be. Cost us an arm and a leg. Or rather, in my case, nearly an arm”

“Um… Lexie and I share a few friends. I think I know what you mean”

She nodded, her smile wistful.

“Yup. Just another thing I owe to Diane and the rest. Mo had a lot of assets, and they came my way”

“Mo?”

“My former owner. Anyway, I earn a proper living now. Book royalties are still coming in, and a couple of papers have me on retainers for social commentary stuff. Paul and I are, well, comfortable now. Enough. Clara: how are you getting home?”

The girl had been leaning against Ish, her hand either on his waist or on his arse, and she jerked in surprise.

“Don’t know, Paula. Was thinking of walking it with Ish”

“Not going to happen, love. He doesn’t get into the House, does he? Not like with Frank or Blake, at least not yet. Anyway, how does he get back? Oh…”

She had clearly read something in the girl’s face.

“I see. Right: ring Debbie now. Tell her where you are, and you can use the living room. Oh, and confirm whether we are meeting Harry or Marlene tonight. Use the conservatory, please. Mike, Maz?”

She waved the two of us towards the bathroom, closing the door behind us.

“They’re sleeping together, or SLEEPING together?”

I answered for the two of us.

“In all senses, Paula. I’ve had a word with the lad, but, well, not my place to talk to Clara, is it?”

“And how do you feel about that? Them having sex, I mean?”

Maz spoke, for what felt like the first time.

“We both wish things were different, Paula”

“You don’t like the idea of him with a trans girl?”

Maz drew in a long breath, then let it go, all at once.

“Not what I meant, not at all. I suspect our son is head over heels, and she used a Welsh word that makes me think she’s in the same place”

I raised my eyebrows, and Maz fixed me with a much better Mum-stare than LC would ever be capable of.

“So I’m a Malay, but we spent enough time with our friends up North for me to pick up some words. I know what ‘cariad’ means”

She turned back to Paula.

“What I would wish different is the geography, Mrs Welby. We live literally a world away. To be blunt, part of the problems Ish has had, in my view, are down to racism. The rest is fallout from my… From my absence. Those are my only issues with the girl, and my husband here has the same views, don’t you, darling?”

“Racism? Really?”

“We live in a bubble in Perth, darling. School is a different place. Remember Dal’s mock turban? I suspect there was some peer pressure behind that”

“Really?”

“Oh, yes. Geeta and I talk just as much as you and Kul do, just differently. So, Paula? Have we passed muster?”

“I am sorry, Maz. I just get protective”

“Paula, I read your book. Just put two and two together. You most certainly have nothing to apologise for. Just a pity I haven’t brought my copy with me for an autograph”

“Ha! Easily sorted, and at least you didn’t bloody ask ‘Where did you get the idea?’. Right: if you are sure you have Romeo in hand, I am off to sort out Juliet. You realise he’ll be sneaking down in the night if she stays?”

Another shrug from my wife.

“Both adults, now. As long as they are happy. Oh, Marlene and Harry?”

“Tonight’s pub choice. Back in a bit. And you don’t have to stay in this bathroom”

Twenty minutes later, as we sat in the living room, there was a banging on the front door. Paul answered, returning with what I immediately dubbed Biker Deb.

“My girl been good, Mike?”

I resisted the temptation to reply ‘Ask Ish’, and instead, in the old, old way, changed the subject.

“I keep hearing ‘Harry or Marlene’, Deb. Explain?”

“Ah. Harry runs the trad-style local just up from our place. Marlene’s Frank’s cousin, and she runs a rather different place in the city centre”

“How different?”

“Very, very different, Mike. It’s a gay bar”

I laughed.

“Making assumptions about our daughter, we don’t qualify!”

“Yes you do”

“Sorry?”

Paula took over.

“You, we—me and Paul—we’re on their side. Which is a big thing. I mean, there are times when we’re… It isn’t that we’re unwelcome there, rather that it would be inappropriate. There are always some people who take a harder line, but that’s not the culture at the Smuggler’s”

“Would that sort of place be suitable for a six year old, then?”

“No, not really. We run a sort of creche system. If it’s just Di’s two, her Mum or a couple of the girls do the duty. If more, say if Lainey and Siân are over, we put them together. Here, sometimes. Make it a camping out thing, sleeping bags in the conservatory, with a couple of babysitters. No abandoning of our children”

There was, once again, just a touch of darkness behind her words, as Debbie’s expression tightened, but this time I understood why, for what else was the House (I could hear the capital letter) about? Paula pulled her mobile from a pocket.

“That was my phone, Mike. Text…excuse me a second”

She peered at the screen, tapping it a few times before smiling.

“From Diane. She has been speaking to Lainey, and is asking if we can be Home Base for tonight. I would suggest she do it herself but…. That was a joke. Anyway, if we have her two, plus the Powell pair, and yours, that would work. Smugglers, Deb? Who would be up for a bit of sprog wrangling?”

“Hmmm. Looks like Clara wants to stay here, which would mean she’d have the sofa if the kids are camping in the glasshouse. Might be a couple of girls up for it, but that would most definitely cramp the style of our Romeo and Juliet here”

Bollocks to it all. Time to take that step into the void.

“Deb, they’ve been sharing a tent all this time. Would you… Sorry, Paula: your house. Would either of you… love, you thinking what I am?”

Maz shrugged, face deadpan.

“His bed is a double, so there’s room”

Two young people were fixed on her words, but Clara’s knuckles were white where she held our boy’s hand. Paula gave a nod, and Deb stared at Claras’s bag before giving a ‘go on’ nod of her own head towards the stairs, and as the pair leapt up, she called out, “Your slots on the dishwashing and laundry rosters aren’t being erased, Clara, just postponed!”

Once they were gone, she settled visibly into her chair.

“Thanks, both. Her experiences have sort of marked her, but even after that chaser, she’s still a romantic. Any plans for when you all fly off to Down Under?”

Maz was in the driving seat by then.

“None at all, Deb, apart from keeping an eye on both of them. It’s going to be a safety net and support thing, to be honest”

Deb was still in pointy mode, so Maz continued,

“Basic hygiene stuff, Deb. That’s all”

“Thanks, Maz. Sorry for pushing it, but I am a bit protective”

“No worries. We are, well, more likely to understand, ey? So what’s the timing?”

“Well, Lainey is on her way, as is Di or so they tell me. Rachel and Emma are now also on their way. Clara?”

“Yes, Nana?”

“Last chance. Are you sure about this?”

She looked up at Ish, possibly for reassurance, and to my immense pride, he simply said, “Has to be your decision, Clar”

“Okay… Yes”

Maz nodded at our boy, then turned back to Deb.

“Anything we need to know about tonight’s venue? Any toes to avoid treading on?”

Deb sighed, but still gave an answer that made sense.

“Just don’t piss people off”

Lainey and her wife, plus offspring, arrived just before Di’s lot, and to my relief, LC was ecstatic. I reminded myself that these were, in essence, her first friends.

“Dad! Dad! Are we camping?”

“Only in the… only in here, love. Remember Rachel and Emma?”

“They liked the Perving Slab!”

Rachel, or Emma, saved me just then.

“We both do, but we have PIXAR!”

“What’s that?”

“You like cartoons?”

Job done.

Di and Blake settled their pair in, the two babysitters incredibly attentive to little Tabitha, and we were off.

It wasn’t that far a walk, to be honest, but once we arrived, the pub was almost a cliché. A couple of leather boys were smoking outside the door of what looked like a huge pub.

“What you bringing us tonight. Deb?”

“Nothing for you, Aidan. All straight, as far as I know”

“Dommage. I do like a decent big boy. And I already know about Blake and Frank. Marlene’s expecting you, in your bar, Lainey”

She nodded.

“I’d expect no less”

“Well, usual disco is on, and there’s a hen party there that looks likely to be leaving shortly”

“Do they know they’re about to leave?”

“Don’t think so. Oh, and Tin-Tin has already been booted out, again”

Elaine frowned.

“Do I know him?”

“Don’t know. Chaser, he is. Likes his aftershave. Tries his luck once or twice a month, but as soon as one of the regular staff spot or smell him, he gets his trolling orders”

“Why does he keep coming, then?”

“Because this is the best place for someone to get lucky. I assume he sees it as a risk-reward balance”

“You going to need my sensible head on with the hens?”

“Oh, ask Marlene, but Lexie, Blondie and a few of the others are already in, and that includes their boss”

“Right. Wife?”

“Yes, fy nghariad?”

“Pass me my drinking head!”

One of those evenings, then. Into the pub, round the corner, and there was the explanation for that comment from ‘Aidan’: the ‘Elaine Powell Var. Probably the best bar named after a policewoman in the world’.

Something over seven feet of drag queen, if I included her wig, came striding across to us, and to my surprise all but ignored Deb, Lainey and the rest, going straight to Maz.

Her voice was incredibly soft, clearly for our ears only, as she took both of my wife’s hands on hers.

“Maryam. I would guess. Be welcome here, love, and understand that this is a safe space. I’m Marlene, and this is my pub. Any issues, ask for me. End of. Mike?”

She transferred one hand and took my right for a very firm shake.

“How’s the little one?”

“With, well, I realised she’s with the first proper friends she’s ever had. Four other kids”

Her jaw set slightly.

“Ever been allowed to have, you mean. Lainey, you trained Di well. Keep making an old queen happy, you lot”

Her voice rose, sharpening in tone.

“Clara, darling: are you trying to outdo Diane in the beef stakes? If he doesn’t work out, I can throw him to the bears”

She then turned to some customer at the bar, verbally and profanely stripped seven layers of skin from him, then dropped her voice again.

“Lil there’s tonight’s head honcho in this bar. Moi will be doing some moving, shaking and REmoving in a little while, but we shall have a catch-up in a few. Laters!”

She was off out the door, and Elaine was already at the bar before she caught Lexie’s shout.

“Got a whip set up. Lainey!”

“How much do you need?”

“Twenty a head”

“Tell you what: I’ll get this as a round for us, and Siân can donate for the whip. What are you drinking, Mike?”

I looked at the line of pumps, for once lost as to which to drink, for they were all strange to me. The barperson, a tall woman (I assumed) with shoulder-length hair pointed at one with a Welsh name.

“Horny Goat, Mike. Start with that. Nice drop. Want a taste?”

I nodded, and she poured some into a glass. Rather nice; I offered some to Maz and Ish, and they both nodded.

“Three goats, then, please. Lil?”

“No; Alwen. Lil’s just changing a piss keg for the lager drinkers. How’s the little girl?”

“Coming on superbly, love. Everyone in here on our case?”

“A lot of us, Mike. This is a close community in here, and you are the biggest story we’ve had in years, and it is a happy ending one, which is even better. Lot of people have got your backs, which is Lainey’s fault. Enjoy your evening. That your boy?”

I nodded, and she raised her voice.

“CLAR! I heard what Marlene said, but that isn’t going to happen. Calling first dibs on him!”

Our son, the rugby forward and footy star, looked to be blushing, but Clara simply laughed, cuddling up to him.

“Nope! Get your own, you tart. This one’s mine!”

Get used to it, son. Welcome to teasing and girly dominance games. I took my pint as Lainey passed out the drinks one by one, and Di led us over to a wiry Asian man who almost reminded me of Stewie.

“Mike, Maz: Sammy Patel, our Inspector. You know those two, these are Rhys, Jonny, Rob, Ellen, Abby, Alun…”

I started to drown in names, so waved a hand to slow her down.

“Di, unless you label everyone, I am not going to remember all those names. Also, as Lainey said, I do believe drinking heads are on”

Sammy laughed, and it was warm and honest.

“Bit like Deb’s brood. I will admit I get lost now and again myself. I just say ‘Hi, girls!’ and leave it at that. Except for Gemma, of course. With her, it’s more ‘Hi, Gem, and do you have any…’ et cetera. How long are you here for?”

“Not sure. Our flight’s on September twenty third, and we’re staying near Gatwick the few days before. I’ve got some box-ticking stuff before then”

“Box ticking?”

“Maz?”

She took over.

“I have a sort of bucket list, Sammy. Not ‘things to see before I die’, but more of a ‘to see now I’m alive again’ list, if you get me”

His gaze turned to the other side of the room, where some more of ‘Deb’s brood’ were clustered around Paula.

“I do get that, Maz. We have more than a little experience between us of being given that new lease. Now, I do have one official request, and it is entirely up to you: would you be willing to do a quick bit on camera? It’s pure politics, I’m afraid, justifying our funding”

“What would it involve?”

“The four of you meeting me and the team, plus our Super Bev Williams. Not so much a ‘Here’s one we prepared earlier’ as a ‘Here’s one we got to in time’. It’s not just part of avoiding budget cuts, which is always on the bloody cards, as a way of stopping a turf war”

“Sorry?”

“Bev was the one who set the unit up, in a way. Under Elaine, they were set up as a task group for a specific case, but Bev saw a niche for them. He’s a very hands-on hands-off manager”

Maz shook her head in some confusion, and Sammy grinned.

“He is fully in control, and keeps other empire builders away from his turf, but he leaves it at that. We get a steer, a strategic direction, but we are left to get on with things as we see fit. It’s called trust, and there are a lot of bosses don’t get that. Lets us use specific talents as a team, as well”

“Like Di’s statement taker thing?”

“You’ve got it. You think she’s dozing off, and then she comes out with something everyone else has missed. That’s how we got that cunt Forbes”

He paused, looking at his glass.

“Did I just say ‘cunt’? Naughty mouth! Well, that is what he is, and that’s the, or rather Another good thing about the team, as we agreed the other day. We get to meet the arseholes of this world, and we get to bang them away, and most importantly, when we’re really, really lucky, we get to see the nice people, the victims, we get to see them smile again”