We ate breakfast as a family plus one (plus bear), and I noticed little nudges by Clara to Ish, with the occasional meaningful look towards Maz or myself. I waited until we had done the dishes and cleared everything away before dropping the hint.

“You want a word with me, son?”

He looked down at his feet for a few seconds, then nodded, so I led him outside into the slowly warming day.

“What is it, Ish?”

“Um, Clara, Dad. She says… Look, her staying with us was my idea, and it’s really nice, and… but she thinks you might see her as pushy, and she doesn’t want that. She wanted me to let you know that if it’s awkward, she can always go back with the others”

I settled myself, choosing what I was saying as carefully as I could. I knew far too much about imposter syndrome: who better?

“She’s shy, isn’t she?”

“Dad, she’s… We both are, Dad”

He looked away towards the Glyders, and away from me, before he spoke again.

“Not easy talking to girls, Dad. I wanted, I HAVE wanted to try at school and at college, but, well, I’m no good at it, I know that, and if I said the wrong thing, it would stay with me, stay with everyone I know. Here, it’s different”

He looked up sharply.

“That sounds wrong too, like I’m just playing with her, and, well, not. It’s just… Dad?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t want to sound stupid, but when Mum was… We both know what being lonely is like. Loads of friends around us, but there’s still a big hole. Wants filling. I don’t know where things are going to go, but least I get that thing that Mr Nguyen always talks about, a fair go. Clara’s told me a lot about that man. Sort of defuses any ideas I have, things that might end up hurting her. She’s… Look. I saw you talking with Alicia and her Dad: did they mention someone called Serena?”

“I’ve heard the name”

“Right, then. Alicia went back to her Dad for one Christmas, and Serena went back to her Mum, same deal. Both went really well. Only difference is that while ‘Licia’s Mum cleared off, Serena’s Dad came back, in the small hours. He…”

A much longer pause.

“I’ve been lonely, Dad. Nana Deb’s girls, lots of them, have had much worse. That’s why I want to do the right things around Clara”

I didn’t want to know about Serena, but I simply had to, so I asked, stupidly.

“What happened, son? To this Serena?”

“When he… When her Dad came round that night, he brought what he needed to torch the house. Both Serena and her Mum. I lost mine for six years, but I, we, we got her back”

Another long pause.

“What do I say to Clara, Dad? About her offer?”

“Ah, son…”

I hugged him hard.

“Go and tell her she needs to start filling flasks and getting her boots on. Day’s wasting”

Enfys was waiting for us at Idwal Cottage, her bike properly locked and her riding kit stored in the café, so we were soon over the little wooden bridge and heading for the Kitchen, Maz oohing at the views while our local guide prattled on about synclines and the folding of rock strata. We stopped at the iron gate so that LC could skim some stones across the water and then continued up the rocky path, as I pointed out Bochlwyd Buttress and the Gribin Facet.

“Your Dad did himself an injury on that slope, Enfys”

She laughed out loud.

“Oh, would that have involved crampons and wet grass?”

“Yes”

“I KNEW it was him! All that ‘I knew someone once who…’ rubbish!”

I shared the story, which brought copious laughter as I came to the bit about a short technical axe, neglecting to mention that both myself and Steph had taken very similar slips, and then we were at the foot of the Slabs.

“Anyone need a shave, or to check their make-up, just look at one of the shiny bits as a mirror”

Enfys was indicating the two routes we would do, which start close together, while Ish and I racked our gear. He was going for an alternate lead with Maz, while Enfys led Clara. I would go fist, followed closely behind LC by Enfys, and then Ish. It meant I would miss seeing the fun at the Twin Cracks, but that couldn’t be helped. As is my custom, I strung the first two pitches together, arriving at the huge stance by the Twin Cracks, where there was more than enough room for all six of us. I’m tall enough to be able to set a foot on one of the polished excuses for footholds and ‘extend’ to reach the huge jug formed by the flake, and I suspected Ish would be the same, but as for the others---well.

“Ish?”

“Dad?”

“Next bit is easy, but gear can be thin. Make sure you extend any wires. It’s mostly pockets, so trust your feet”

That pitch can feel a bit way-out-there, but it is safe when taken steadily. I soon arrived at the base of the long corner, and brought LC up, Enfys climbing just beneath her and collecting my gear.

“Who lifted her at the Cracks, love?”

“Nobody, Uncle Mike. She looked at the Cracks, said ‘Jams!’, and her fingers were small enough. Could you shift up the corner a bit so that I can bring Clara up? Just a couple of feet. Just set some higher anchors, then transfer to them one by one”

“Who’s been climbing longest, love?”

“Who’s the professional here, love?”

She spoilt it by giggling, but who cared? I got myself and LC up further, Clara duly appeared and was secured in turn.

“I had forgotten I knew those words, Mr Rhodes! Any more hard bits?”

“Nope, but this part is really nice. Way up in the air, but easy climbing, and the views are sublime”

“Right. Thanks”

Enfys took my rope, and I started to float up what is, for so many people, the best part of the climb, for there are gear placements literally everywhere, the moves are simple and repetitive, and the climber is left to enjoy being four hundred feet or so from the ground with al that entails.

Up; a last savour of the position, and onto the belay ledge to bring up my daughter, who was laughing happily all the way.

“Do it again, Dad? I climbed the Cracks!”

“Not doing this one again, love, but another one, a bit harder. That one’s all sparkly”

Enfys brought Clara, who was clearly blown away, but nicely, and then Ish topped out. It was a little while before Maz got there, though. As we waited, Clara quite casually turned to Ish, said “Thank you”, and kissed him on the lips. That brought a stupendous blush from him, so I muttered something about ‘taking in’, and he then turned his concentration to securing his mother.

“Ish?”

“Yes, Mum?”

“Runners, Ish. Put some in. I was supposed to be leading that last bit, OK?”

I had a sudden flashback of myself on Tennis Shoe, so gave him a bit of a glare.

“But it was so easy, Dad”

“So’s hitting the ground, son. Your Mum’s right. Now, what did you mean you climbed the Cracks, Carolyn?”

Maz laughed and tousled the girls hair through the slots in her helmet.

“Small fingers, darling. They were massive holds to her. Four moves and she was on top of the flake”

Up we went, then, and down the scramble, where I did indeed lower off LC at the bulge, before we settled ourselves at the base of the slabs for lunch, followed by Charity, which I noticed had been upgraded from V Diff to Severe, just as Tennis Shoe had followed my own views of it and been raised to Hard Severe.

Back down again, LC chattering away about sparkles (there’s a lot of quartz on the route, and Maz was much calmer about Ish and his use of runners.

“Yeah, Dad, but that start! I got six feet up, and then I just slid all the way back down. That’s polished! Made me want to get some gear in”

Thank god for that. Climbing as three ropes had eaten almost all of the day, but my crew looked happy with what they had done.

“I have a suggestion, folks”

“What, Dad?”

“An easier route on the Gribin, and then…ice cream”

Enfys simply said, “Slab?”, and I nodded.

“Then straight down to the kiosk”

I was just slinging my rucksack, when the half-expected question arrived, from a typically grubby ‘traditional walker’.

“Been climbing, little lady?”

“Yes! Doing more!”

“Don’t go up too high, though. You toproping the mite?”

I shook my head.

“Nope. She’s seconding me”

“Really? Where?”

“Hope and Charity, so far. We’re off to push her grades tomorrow, cause she’s only managed Severe so far. There’s an HVS she’ll enjoy, a slate one. Anyway, we’re off for another route, and then she and her bear need ice cream”

I waved and set off before he could manage anything coherent, and it was Clara, of all people, who laughingly told me how bad I was. I reached out one-armed to hug her and immediately released her.

“Fancy leading one?”

We walked our ice creams down to the Chapel Rocks once we had finished the long routes for the day, so of course I had to set up a top rope for the ‘problems’. Clara had declined the offer of a go at leading, but she had clearly been hard-bitten by the bug, so we played around on the boulders in question until it was time to head down to Bethesda.

“Enfys?”

“Yes?”

“That slip by the Gribin. There’s another story, from here. An impromptu group of hostellers, both sexes, all in their twenties, yeah?”

“Go on…”

“Well, one of the lads, he has his eye on a particular girl, so he’s out to impress her. That little roof there?”

“I know it, yes. I may already be familiar with this story”

“I’m not, Mr Rhodes”

“Thank you, Clara. Anyway, there he is, tight T-shirt and short shorts”

“Like at the Perving Slab?”

“Exactly. So he’s under the roof, and he’s basically tensing and flexing so it all stands out, his muscle definition, and then he makes that energetic pull around the roof”

“And?”

“And he lets out the loudest of loud farts as he does so. Dreams shattered, oh dear”

“Ish?”

“Yeah?”

“Does your Dad always tell such crap jokes?”

I humphed.

“For an English teacher, oh dear. Anecdotes, woman, not jokes”

Ish snorted happily.

“They’re still crap, Dad”

“Remember one little thing son, he says aptly”

“Which is?”

“Clara will be leaving me with her e-mail address”

“Why?”

“So I can send her some of the photos we’ve taken today”

“And so?”

“And it’s traditional. She’s already seen you as a little kid. Not yet as a baby. And just remember the title of that O’Rourke book: Age and Guile Beat Youth, Innocence and a Bad Haircut”

“Well, got you there then, cause to have a haircut, good or bad, you need to have some hair”

“Cheeky pup!”

“You’ve trained me well, Dad”

I turned to Maz to get her input, and she was weeping. Ish went straight to his mother, as did LC, so I joined them, for we were a family, and Maz buried her face in my shoulder.

“Sorry, sorry… Just seeing how much I missed, how much they stole from us”

“No need for sorry, love”

“Not just from me, darling! They stole it from all of us. It’s… It’s grief, love, but it’s also joy, and…”

She looked up, eyes screwed up to try and break the flow of tears, and kissed my cheek.

“It’s odd, darling. The loss, yeah? It’s there all the time, but then I see you, together with our son, and, well, pride, joy: I chose this man, we made this other man, look how right I was in my choices… Sorry, Enfys, Clara: still finding my feet again. Sorry”

Enfys joined us in the hug.

“Are we not bloody family, Maz? All of us, ah? What you lot have done for Alys? Amazed at your strength, we are”

“I haven’t done anything for her…”

“Your man and your son, as you said. You shaped them, so no more of that. Now, here’s our plan. Want to join us, Clara? Hugs are good”

“I’m not…”

“Get in and hug, woman. We’re plotting, and I need some of your input”

“What about?”

“I’m off home tonight, but I’ll try and pop out tomorrow, if you’re at the Bus Stop. For now, I think you need to report in, back to Deb. Then back to the bunkhouse, where I will have a menu awaiting, for the Dwr y Mynydd. You eat Chinese food, Clara?”

Maz laughed suddenly, and I pulled back slightly so I could see her face.

“The joke is?”

“Oh, I can’t remember which of them it was, but when we did that video meeting, all those years ago, one of them, Alys or Enfys, looked at me and said ‘Dwr y Mynydd eyes!’. And I suspect the culprit is the one here right now. So we have come full circle!”

That was my wife, in essence. Even when crushed, she was still finding joy behind the darkness.

We filled the old Hafod road as we walked back to car and bike, leaving Enfys to ride back as we drove the short distance to the camp site so that Clara could make her dirty-stop-out report. Gemma was watching as we walked in, her expression dismal, but when Ish took his girl’s hand, her smile could have dimmed the early evening sun.

“She behaved herself, Mike?”

“Impeccably, Deb”

An older girl was looking past Deb.

“What routes? Sorry, I’m Cathy”

“What did we do, Mr Rhodes?”

“Hope and Charity on the Slabs, and Slab on the Gribin”

“Oh! Polished as polished things”

Deb held up a hand.

“Sorry, Cathy, but need to sort something sharpish. You back with us, Clara? Meal portions need adjusting if you are, that’s all”

The girl looked at me, as if for permission, then gave her answer.

“Um, no. Enfys is ordering Chinese for us”

Deb’s smile was warmer than I had seen for ages.

“Just remember what the departure day is, woman. Plans for tomorrow?”

“Mr Rhodes said something about a Bus Stop”

Cathy yelped, then called out “Scott! Nell! Leo!”

When they arrived, Cathy grinned.

“Fancy keeping a clean slate tomorrow? That’s where this lot are going”

She then dropped her grin.

“Sorry, Mr Rhodes. Presumptuous of us. We’ve done a lot, but it’s mostly been in the Lakes, Scotland or the Alps. Never felt the confidence to try slate”

“Hang on… Are you the ones who got engaged halfway across ‘Dream of White Horses’?”

‘Nell’ nodded happily, as Cathy continued.

“What grade do you climb at, Mr Rhodes? Nell and me, we’ve managed E1 so far, at Tremadog”

“Oh, I’m pretty comfortable around E6, but I’m more of a grit climber”

Maz grinned, so much brighter since her spasm on the old road.

“Our child is up to Severe now”

As ‘Scott’ turned to Ish, clearly to ask which climbs, Maz simply carried on.

“No, our other child. Don’t know how she’ll cope on slate, as she likes gritstone---”

“JAMMING! HANDS AND FISTS!”

“---as you can hear”

Cathy mugged at Nell, saying, “Shall we just give up now?”, before laughing happily. I smiled back.

“The plan is to head over to the Bus Stop quarry, which is ideal for newcomers to slate, and then head in for Serengeti, which has some real classics. There’s a superb HVS, for example, with no long reaches”

Leo, who sounded Italian, blanched.

“You’re going to take the little girl up HVS?”

“Knowing her, she’ll take herself up. She’ll have a top and tail rope, though. If you want to meet us there, it would be nice”

“Right.. Clara? What are you wearing on your feet for this?”

“Rock shoes. Enfys found me some from her work place. Better than trainers”

She was suddenly filled with confidence, grinning at Ish before adding, “And my view’s better than at the Perving Slab”

A chorus of “Oh you tart, Clara!” erupted from every girl in earshot, and she blushed, but kept the grin. Time to get moving, Rhodes, and an idea hit me. We arranged a time for a morning rendezvous at the bunkhouse, and I rattled off a quick e-mail from my phone.

Enfys had the menus, I had the credit card, we all had the Chinese, and before we all met the others at the Bunkhouse, we had a video meeting with Keith and Penny, and the office staff who were in at work got to meet Kawan.