Okay, so I think I hallucinated yesterday.
For some reason I looked at my left hand palm side up, and I saw a bunch of fine scratches. Nothing new about finding scratches, I do that to myself all the time and don't remember when, but then, a couple of hours later I looked again . . .
No scratches. No signs there had ever been scratches there.
I don't quite know what to make of this, folks . . .
Comments
Perhaps
Maybe you're clairvoyant and were getting a glimpse of the past or future. ;o)
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin ein femininer Mann
Had similar a few years ago
Still Happens some.
Shortly when I got on my own after the shelter situation a few years ago.
I had drunk a glass and a half of wine.
When I woke up or I think I did, my entire wrist was cut open, steak knife beside me, swear I could see the bone, but I felt nothing & fell back to sleep.
Now when I rewoke, it was good as new, not even a scar, though the blade was dirty I thought it was blood, but I apparantly made tomatoe sandwhiches to have with my meds & immaturelly with my wine.
I was diagnosed not much before or after with several psychological issues; including but not limited to borderline personality disorder & Schitzophrenia.
I do know for many years I have had an anxiety leveling fascination with playing with knives & on more then one occasion had accidents upon myself.
It was hypothosized that it may have been the alcohol reacting poorly with my medications that help with those conditions I was placed on such as seroquel & lamotrogene.
We are both canadians, so I am certain you know outside the hospital there are no 'insane asylums' & hospitals have a max of 2 week mandatory stays that they can impliment without court appointed psychiatric rehabilitaion.
If you are going to get help with this, under such probabilities I would advise making sure that they are not the 'form (legally enforced psyche hold) ask questions later' types, but if this is an ongoing situation, making your therapist/counselor aware of it, is imperitive.
Your not crazy, hallucinations happen to everyone every now and then particularily those of us with CPTSD & other trauma related conditions, especially with a history of ongoing self abuse.
Know I am here for you dorothy <3 your by no means alone
With Love and Light, and Smiles so Bright!
Erin Amelia Fletcher
Stupid Bagels
Have you had your eyes checked lately? Sometimes, when your vision is less than perfect your brain will fill in missing details about what you're seeing. One time when I had gone too long between visits with the optometrist and I was doing lots of squinting to try and see better I saw a banner across the front of a bagel shop that said: HOME OF THE STUPID BAGEL. Which seemed very strange, but I saw every letter of the slogan clearly. But when I got closer I saw that it said HOME OF THE STUFFED BAGEL. Oh... That makes a lot more sense.
So that could be one reason you saw scratches on your hand that looked totally real to you. I don't think that quite qualifies as a hallucination on the level of seeing glowing pink neon winged alligators who are telling you to jump off a bridge and they'll catch you...
None of us ever see see reality as it truly is- if there is such a thing. We see a version of it as interpreted by our limited senses (why can't we see radio waves and x-rays?) and our puny under-powered organic computers ("The universe might not just be queerer than we imagine. It might be queerer than we can imagine..." ~some guy). And sometimes our senses and cognition get things wrong. But that doesn't mean we're spiraling into madness or senility. It's just a thing that happens to even healthy brains. "Empirical reality" isn't 100% reliable. And I don't think it's a problem unless it really starts fucking with our lives (schizophrenia, for example); it just makes things interesting and keeps us humble about the limits of what what can really know about reality; and that our best guesses + most firmly held ideas might be wrong. Plato's cave and the Buddha's samsara and all that.
Either that, or what happened to you was a glitch in The Matrix we all unknowingly inhabit...
Have a red pill, They're cherry flavored.
~hugs, Veronica
,
If Grateful Dead fans are called Deadheads
what do you call a Phillip K. Dick fan???
Well shit, I guess it really CAN happen here..,
.
For those of us around 60+ yo, diphenhydramine can ...
... cause problems. It's an over-the-counter drug, and is in >a lot< of OTC medicines.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diphenhydramine
Check what you are taking, and see if you can stop or switch.
---
Maybe 6 years ago, I was trying diphenhydramine to get a good night's sleep in a hospital.
A nurse woke me for some reason, and I told him to stay put while I spent about a minute trying to remember my name, where I was, and why... You bet it's on my medical charts as an allergy.
My Mom, then about 96 yo, got waking vivid, lucid hallucinations of columns of numbers and letters flowing down the wall. Oh yeah, we stopped the drug ..