seems to be an ongoing issue for Madeline Anafrid

Call it what you like, my enthusiasm rises and wanes on what seems like an hourly basis. I often seem to be going through the motions without purpose or enjoyment, take my bike rides for instance, It would be so very easy to just say 'sod it' and stay in doors, i often have to force myself into going out, at heart i'm a lazy bugger and i know it would easily go from missing one ride to a week, a month. But give me a purpose and there's no holding me, its been like that this week, of course lack of Mojo isn't just a bike thing but can affect all aspects of life - getting dressed, going for walks, writing, reading, even eating.

On Thursday i decided on a longer ride, the forecast was quite mild after all and so i headed down towards Bridgwater, some few miles south of Weston. I was actually quite enthused until lunch time, when i decided to cut my original plan back a bit, i had Mojo but not that much! The return leg i felt like i was on autopilot but even with a good dollop of untried roads it felt like i was on auto pilot much of the time. I stopped the clock with just over 100 miles completed but apart from the expected tiredness, there was no strong feeling about the ride.

Snap to yesterday and i departed with more enthusiasm than i've felt all week. Some new roads and a couple of miles of bridleway before lunch and i was fairly pumped. Okay i cut the route back again but this time because the weather was looking a bit iffy. After lunch i set off for the return and managed to fit in another couple of miles of off road riding, an ice cream and some 'weather' before i got back with a little over 80 miles but 1200m of up, feeling quite elated.

Will this refound cycling Mojo last? Can't answer that one. What I have come to realise is that i'm really missing social intercourse in my life, even just the regular cafe stops on my rides, talking rubbish over a drink with friends once a month, I lived alone for 30 years but I never felt as lonely, isolated even as i do now. I go riding on my own, walking on my own, shopping on my own - oh, I might have a short discourse with Bev but often that will be the sum of the days conversation and i like to talk, its how we best exchange ideas, cement friendships and so on, 'social media' is a misnomer, its not social at all.

Today its a Gaby chapter, of course Gaby has no such social woes, rather she has the opposite issue as you'll see in Triple Booked.

Thats it for today,
Wiedersehn
Madeline Anafrid

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