N21 Chapter 2.6

Colleen had some scopes showing the exteriors of the bays.

There was something wrong, however. I stepped closer and peered at them. Half of them looked as though they had been rubbed by a rough grit sandpaper over their entire surface.

"What happened?" Rashda asked.

Marc hurried into the command center, and answered.

"We were doing an inspection of the exterior. As you know, we touched the atmosphere briefly. The starboard side of the ship touched the orange haze. The port didn't. At first I didn't know what the haze was. I do now.

"Apparently, missiles like the ones N21 and N22 held were fired off on Earth."

"What?!!?"

I had never seen fury like I saw on Rashda's face that day.

“I thought they were sent into the sun,” John said.

“They were,” Smythe replied.

“Weren’t they the only missiles left in orbit?” I asked.

“Yes, they were. They must have missed the sun when we fired them.”

Marc just looked at him. I could tell he wanted to ask how, but didn’t.

I figured I could ask with a bit more tolerance than Marc could, so I asked.

The fury left Rashda’s face, as even though I was born a man, he would never yell at a woman. “I’m not sure, Dear Lady. I do know that the programming for them should have taken them directly into the sun. Colleen and I collaborated on it.”

“Rashda,” Colleen addressed him. “I’m looking at the course we set. There is no way those missiles should have missed.”

He walked over and looked at the course. “I don’t see any way they could have missed, however the question now is what is happening on the ship.”

Marc walked into the center of the room. “The outer hull appears to be deteriorating.”

“What?” John was shocked. “Was it from coming in contact with our atmosphere?”

“We just skimmed the atmosphere. The other side of the ship had much less contact.”

“Is there any deterioration on it?”

“Some, but not as much. I believe whatever is causing it was considerably more concentrated on the starboard side.”

“When you say deteriorating,” I asked, scared of the answer, “do you mean that it is still occurring?”

“Yes,” Marc answered.

"Will it come through to the interior?" John wondered.

"There certainly seems to be that possibility."

I was completely sick of this entire situation. "When will this end? We have gone through hell and back for Willem, we've changed genders, I've been terrified of my husband… what more does this bastard want of us?" By the end of my tirade, I was starting to cry.

"Come on, Honey. Let's get you back to our room." John put his arm around me and began to guide me out of the command center. I was not having it! "No!" I ducked under his arm and spun to face him. On his face was a look of complete surprise. I don't think anyone else expected it either.

"I am not going to be shooed away… the poor Rose… mommy to be. Her hormones have her in a tizzy! I won't be treated that way, John. Not by you or anyone else." I know I was giving him a look that would probably have made Willem Wallace rethink his plans, but I was fed up. I just wanted to be able to live my life in peace with my husband and children. Was that too much to ask?

It suddenly dawned on me that everyone was staring. I looked around, and had my face not been flushed from my anger already, it would be now from embarrassment. I stepped over to a chair and sat down hard. I was embarrassed, but I was also pissed off. I glared at John, who seemed to think that the better part of valor was to concede.

Smythe looked from me to John, and I gave up on glaring at John. How dare he look to John for the decision. I was fully able to make my own mind up! "Don't you dare ask John if it's okay for me to stay, Rashda," I exclaimed! I wanted to cry again, but my pride wanted to scream. What the hell was wrong with me?

I think John figured that I needed calmed, but I wasn't about to leave. He did the only thing he could. He pulled a chair up next to me, sat down, and offered his hand.

I grabbed it in a vice like grip, then I put my head on his shoulder. My crying was now full force. Everyone seemed to be trying to look anywhere but at me. Carla had accompanied us from the briefing room, and now she stepped to Rashda's side. She whispered something to him, then stepped away. The commander simply went to his personal chair and sat down. Rather than brush me off, he simply went over the course figures again with Colleen. I wasn't being ignored, but I was given some space to vent. I wasn't sure if any pregnant woman had ever been treated with such respect, but I appreciated the respect that everyone gave me.

After a few minutes, I kissed John's cheek and gave him a tight hug. "Thank you," I whispered in his ear. He returned the embrace and we stood up. Rashda didn't hurry or show any frustration. Instead he finished his conversation with Colleen, then stood up.

"Have you any idea what these are, Marc?" It seemed that he was going to act like nothing had happened.

"I'm guessing," Marc said while giving me a nervous glance, that they are nanites." I smiled reassuringly, hoping that I could keep my emotions at bay. I wanted to scream again in frustration, but I was afraid if I did, I wouldn't have a choice. I would be expelled from the command center.

"I think Rose is right, Commander. This would most likely be another one of Caesar's playtimes."

"I guessed that, Marc." He sighed. "I'm tired. Do you have any idea what we can do?"

"No, Sir."

Rashda nodded. "Find out, please. I'm gonna take a nap."

I watched him leave and he looked as though he was going to cry. I realized that he probably blamed himself somehow. Those missiles were programmed by him and Colleen. The whole idea was his to launch them. I felt horrible for losing it the way I did.

Suddenly, I wanted to head to our rooms. I had just made a good friend feel responsible for the death of our planet. I couldn't speak, so I simply motioned to John that I needed some sleep. He nodded and I made my exit.

I was walking down down the street in our bay when John caught me. I realized I had been engrossed in my thoughts and had missed the doors that would take me home. I shook my head and we walked back. We didn't say anything until we got into our living area. Once again, I sat down and started crying, only this time, I poured out my thoughts to John.

I'm certain there were times he wanted to yell, "Snap out of it, woman!" Wisely, he didn't.

"You didn't need to make him feel bad, Rose. He already felt horrible."

"Right," I said to him. "I made it worse."

"No. I don't think that would be possible."

I knew he was right. For some reason, I was looking for something to fuel my depression. I wasn't sure why, but I suspected my hormones were running wild from the pregnancy. I took a shakey breath and nodded. I decided that I really did need a nap, so I went into the bedroom. John accompanied me but I turned away from him as he lay down.

I really didn't want to feel good, and I suspect that John knew that. He spooned up to me put his mouth beside my ear. I really didn't want to hear him tell me how beautiful he thought I was, or how much he loved me. He kept punctuating his statements with kisses. I didn't want this! I wanted to feel bad! I tried to get up.

I tried to scream at him. Instead, he somehow got through to my addled brain and I finally started listening. I turned my head back to look at him. He was propped up on an elbow, apparently waiting for my brain to start working sensibly. He smiled at me and kissed away some tears. I rolled over and snuggled up to him, and marvelled that I had such a man. Eventually, I fell asleep.

About halfway through the night I awoke with a start. Something was very wrong, but I couldn't place it. I was still curled up next to John, and his breathing was even. I carefully disentangled my body and tried to sit up without waking him. I went into the restroom, did what I needed, then threw on a robe. I stepped into our living area and looked around. I couldn't see anything wrong. I heard a sound from the bathroom and realized that, as usual, I wasn't able to get up without waking John.

I could detect absolutely nothing strange, but I knew there was something, somewhere, if I could just place a finger on it. John came out of the bathroom. He was wearing just his pajama bottoms, and I really wanted to grab him and convince him to go back to bed with me… but what the hell was wrong?

John had an odd look as well. "Do you feel it?" he asked me.

"It woke me up, but…" my voice trailed off. "What is it?" I asked him.

He shook his head, turned and went back into the room. The light came on, and I hurried to see what he was doing. He was getting dressed. I gathered that our night had ended, so I grabbed some clothes and threw them on.

I really wanted to put on makeup at this time of morning, but he pulled me out of the room. We headed to the control room and were met there by Marc and Carla, as well as Rashda and Colleen. It appeared that we all were awakened by something.

I glanced at the status screen, and everything was green all the way across. But then, one of the bay status lights went yellow.

"Rashda!"

He turned from where the men had been discussing something and hurried to Colleen's side. By the time he got there, three more had gone yellow. Then the first yellow turned red, and it was if everything moved to slow motion. The computer had already shut the doors to that bay… Our bay! Then, when the red light came on, it signified some sort of catastrophic failure.

What it would mean on a passenger ship was one thing, but on a weapons platform, it meant that you get rid of a failing missile bay as soon as possible.

I watched numbly as my home was once again lost. I wanted to lash out, but the horror escalating all around stopped me. I saw another light go red. Already, john had grabbed a mic and was ordering people to evacuate all bays to the upstairs and downstairs rings.

Through the corridors, I could hear screams and panicked voices. A light went red. Thunk! Another light went yellow, while two more went red. Thunk! Thunk! I glanced at, then couldn't look away from the screens showing the bays. The first one, our home, seemed to be crumbling away as it slowly pirouetted, the distance between us growing.

I stared, and everything seemed to be happening at the end of a dark tunnel. The next thing I knew, I was waking up on the floor with Carla beside me, making sure I was alright.

Author’s note:

This is the end of N21, however the story will continue, merged in with After Caesar Part 2 Chapter 1.