Dear Diary,

I am sooo confused today! A few? days ago i went into surgery to take care of a plate that was sticking out due to some other issues (ofwhichiwillnotbementioningatthismoment) l was in the hospital for 2 days. Durring those two days i had amnesia. I love my mother and i want to express that when she told me that i wanted nothing more than to be as far away from her as physically possible. Jo stayed by me when mom was gone. So from this point I'm going to tell you all about the happiest day of my life, when i became a girl for a day.

The doctors told my mother that there were complications coming out of anaesthesia. I had no recolection of my name and insisted that i be called Helen. (Btw when Jo told me this i was horrified because i had inadvertently came out to my mother.  The one person who i had never wanted to find out.) Much to my bittersweet relief. The doctors told my mother that it would be some time before i came-to. This means that my unconsious mind (my innermost thoughts where my feminine persona resides) was on full display. Good thing everyone thought it was a delusion.

Apparently, mom had always wanted a daughter and seeing as i wouldnt remember, she snatched her opportunity. When we left the hospital for home, we didnt actually go home. We went to get a hotel in Reno Nevada. You guys thought i was crazy paranoid. My mother wanted to make sure nobody would recognize either of us so bad she left the state.

So i... wait, i bet you guys are wondering how i know all of this right? Jo did fill me in on a few details but she was only at the hospital. I was actually in a dream state. I seriously thought it was all a dream. Can you believe it? I mean yeah I'm a bit neurotic but I'm not an airhead. Its both creepy and exciting. Creepy because i had no control over myself, exciting because the real me finally got to shine through.
Back to reality, the reality that was a few days ago anyway. I woke up from a weird dream feeling completely at peace. My mom asked me how i was and i told her (in the most feminine voice i could muster) that i felt like a new person. She freaked out and called the doctor. After doing a CAT scan they told her that the best way to treat me was to wait it out in the mean time act as everything is normal. So anyway, mom booked a trip to Reno for about a week.

In reno. I wake up to find that i am in the cutest red nightgown, my mother apparently went to the store with Jo after swearing her to secrecy(oh mother if you only knew). We spent the morning getting our nails done. We went shopping for matching outfits. I almost got my ears pierced but she told me she wasn't paying for anything perminant (one of the many many times i genuinely thank you for not causing damage i could deny later. Oh i forgot that my sister went away on a mission trip and she'll be gon for 2 months. We dodged that bullet because it looks like we packed some of her clothes. Anyway on day 2 we went and got makeovers. All-in-all I'm sort of relieved that I'm back to normal. We have 3 days left in Reno and i am a bit torn. Either i fake it and we continue to make my mother uncomfortable (which i do not enjoy) or i pretend to hate the fact that we didn't pack any boys clothes. Oh well, at least i got to be a girl for a day.