Dear Diary,

I am probably the luckiest girl in the... the second luckiest g... the... well lets just say I'm pretty lucky today. Oh right, context, so today Jo hatched a plan to borrow me from my mother. The conversation is oh so funny that i thought you might like to... hear? read?... recount the words as though you were there with us. Ya know like a fly on the wall. Now, without further ado...

I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing. Its obviously Jo. We have our encrypted conversation.

Jo: "Rise and shine Mr. Gummer. You have a promise to fulfill!"
Code: "its Showtime beautiful"
Me: "Please don't"
Code: "hurry your ass over here I'm dying"

Within 5 minutes my partner in crim is at the door. "Good morning Momma E, how are you today?

My mother the ever impressed strikes up a round of small talk while i wait for my cue. 5 minutes of buttering up my mother... and i still have to wait another 5 minutes for why Jo showed up out of the blue. You see, as you probably know by now (and if you don't worry not i need to keep reminding myself from time to time) that my mother is a bit old fashioned. "You stick to your word or you put your head between your leggs and kiss the road because I'm not tolerating a liar whose word means smut."

Getting back to Jo's presence. We concocted a plan to "force me" to crossdress with my mother's approval. Toparaphraseafamousquotefromaweirdmovieisawaglimpsof'causeitwastooinapropriateformyhouse (fuew don't try saying that in one breath or you'll nearly pass out like me... i almost forgot the quote) i like to dabble on the edge myself-but not really 'cause as my bff said earlier I'm more paranoid than a survivalist who hates the government who works for different governments like Mexico South Africa and SouthAfriCanada #luvuMrKeaton. Where was i... and another facepalm for the lovely HelenRodriguez (say that in an anouncer voice)

You may or may not be asking "how did you get your mom to let you crossdress?" The answer is quite simple, i would be grounded for breaking a promise to Jo to help her with a project for school. I told her i would help her with her sewing class but she "failed to mention" that the article in question was in fact a dress. Normally if Jo wants to see me in something she made she would just have me come over when nobody was home and i do mean neither of our families were home. Don't get me wrong i Luv luv luv Uncle Bill and Aunt Didi but I'm still not going to come out to Jo's family even on accident.

Jo thought it would be cool if we didn't have to jump through a bunch of hoop(earring)sseewhatididthere just to try on one outfit. I thought whats the harm. So we hatched ... im being repetitive again arent i.

So mom opens the door to see Jo, they exchange pleasentries and Jo hits my mom with a bombshell.

Jo: "Momma E, Leonard wont help me after he promised to do anything to help me in my sewing class short of exams, could you help me out?"

Mom: "What is the job Miss Greene and I'll make sure Lenny does it. You know my motto, "Breaking a promise is like breaking Jesus's back twice over while splashing his wounds with lemon juice"

Jo: "Cool, so the thing is, i need a model and I'm not sure you would let him."

Mom: "Whatever you need Jo, he'll do it or i'll write a letter to his dad to come get him, for the record, last i heard from him he's worse than me"

Jo: "Ok then that makes things easier."

Turning my direction she game mw the cue at which i trudged out of my hiding place feigning dispare. She lets out "ok Mrs. Doubtfire time to make your new dress!"