It is sobering to finally understand that perhaps much of my hiding in the shield of extreme religion is that I did not have to address actually doing what a woman does. There have been a few men my age actually "hit" on me and I've effectively run screaming down the street. And, it is well known that when some men find out about you, even if you are Post Op and look the part, they can be very dangerous.
I've even repulsed the men that knew and not because I am so holy, but because I was frightened to death, yikes.
Sometimes I wish I had taken on the "full mantel" of womanhood. It's too late now.
Gwen
Comments
The Doctor (I use that term loosly)that did my SRS
has probably screwed me up for life. His name was Dr. Dulin, of the Plano Plastic Surgery Institute. Add the stroke and being in the wheelchair (probably for life) I doubt there will ever be any one for me..
This is me now, I am not yet used to standing on my good right side and balancing, hence my look of terror,I was trying to smile, honest I was.
Maybe the question ...
... should be, What is a woman according to YOU?
I think that we have to find our own definition post-op of who we are as women. Because no matter what we say we are still bound to our male histories and therefore more a mixture of both male and female, until you let go of the socially imposed vision of what you are told you should look like, and how you should act.
Sorry but I have to ask, how does a 'trans person' live behind a shield of extreme religion? That is truly an oxymoron. Like 'gay Republican. You do know what the Abrahamic religions say about us, don't you? Or do you just choose to ignore those horrible parts of the Bible and the Torah?
but it is the rare moments of beauty and peace
in between the chaos,
That makes it worth living."
- Tertia Hill
I agree with Mantori
It is up to us to define the kind of woman we are. There are plenty of cis women our there, who'd react like you, too, wanting to run away screaming from the men of that generation.
Sexual orientation is independent from the physical sex. Sometimes it changes with HRT and the operation, sometimes it doesn't. Women being automatically attracted to men is as much a myth as most of the rest of what society claims to know about transgender, or abour humanity in general for that matter.
Make up your mind what is truly YOU and what is societal expectation, then take your pick of what YOU want. That is the thing that really matters.
Monique S
I have found that...
I have found that once I liberated myself and my mind. It it me free to just open up to what I felt attraction wise. Pre transition I would have sworn I was going to be a lesbian. Now I find that the question is more complex then I thought.
It even differentiates between who do I want to be romantically involved with (mostly other women) with and who do I want to have sex with (there could be a male I that picture somewhere)
Anne Margarete