The road of life is filled with ups and downs. These can be hills and valleys spanning a wondrous vista. But let us not forget that even on our most favorite roads there may be potholes and hairpin curves.

Please read The Decision Part 1 . Thank you, BrandieS

Previously: Connie has frequently been mistaken for a girl and actually plays on his High School Girl's Softball team. After being referred to a doctor, both Connie and his mom are told that genetically he is a girl. Both mother and child are scared by this information and subsequent acts.

Continuing:

Then I did a dumb thing, I looked at him as he was walking cross the room with his parents. My mom saw me loking at him and I turned red again. Gosh, what was wrong with me? I'm a BOY. But I had just looked at another boy and thought he was cute. Uggh! Was I turning queer? I musta done something, cause mom was laughing. Dad asked what was so funny and mom said "nothing."

As I was getting ready for bed, Mom came into my room and talked about what happened at the restaurant. I was embarassed. Mom said that if what the doctor said was true, then I was just being a normal girl. This kinda scared me. Mom hugged me goodnight and I went to bed.

We don't go to church much. Sometimes on the holidays, Easter, Christmas, but not regular. Even then, dad says that people who only put on a good face on the holidays and don't go to church the rest of the time are hippiecrits, something like that. Still, it don't mean that I don't believe, or Mom or Dad. As I lay in bed, I looked at the ceiling and asked God what he thought. Musta been keeping his thoughts to himself. I rolled over and went to sleep.

I was walking down the hall in school wearing a pretty sun dress. It had a low neckline and was trimmed in lace. It was a pale yellow color and I had on matching shoes and socks. I was carrying a white clutch purse along with my school books. The books were heavy and I readjusted them just as a boy stepped beside me. He said hello and asked if he could carry my books. I don't know why, but I let him. We walked down the hall and I thought it looked kinda dark. I was getting nervous, but he said that he would keep me safe. There was something in his voice that was reassuring and so we kept walking. As we came to an unused room, the door flew open and a bigger boy came out grinning. The boy carrying my books dropped them floor. He grabbed my arm, then the other boy and him dragged me into the empty room. They hit me in the belly and I gasped for breath, but they just hit me again. Then the boy, I didn't know which one, grabbed the back of my dress at the neck and pulled hard downward, tearing my dress off me. I was huddled on the floor, gasping for breath and crying. One of the boys had a pocket knife and cut my bra off. The other boy grabbed my panties and tore them off. I was naked. One of them pushed me back and knelt with their knees on my arms so they was looking at my feet. He smiled a wicked smile and put his hands on my thighs and pushed them down. He said something to the other boy and that one pulled his pants down. His shirt was pulled up and I saw his thingy get hard. He smiled and kicked me in the legs, then got on his knees as he held my legs wide open. He pushed his hand into the place between my legs and then he pulled himself up and pushed his thingy into me. It hurt real bad and I tried to scream. A hand was placed over my mouth and I felt some of the fingers pinch my nose. I struggled to get away. I musta passed out. I woke up and felt like heck. My face hurt and my body did too. Breathing was hard. Walking was harder. I tried to stand up, but I just fell over. I lay there and cried. I musta passed out again, cause when I woke up there was bright lights all around me. I was in a strange bed and mom was holding my hand, crying. A man walked up the the bedside and I screamed. I woke up sweating. Gosh, what a nightmare. Mom came running into my room and asked what was wrong. I was real still and didn't say anything, so she got up to leave. At the door, I called her back and hugged tightly to her. She lay on the bed beside me and asked if I wanted to talk about it. I sniffled then told her of my dream. She cried too.

I played Softball all through high school, but didn't win a Scholarship. There were two reasons why I didn't win; the first was my grades, no matter how hard I studied, I just couldn't do good, but the other reason was that the Scholarship people were told that I said I was a boy and the school got into trouble over letting me play. The School people and the doctor had to go to some meeting, but they said they weren't mad at me.

I tried to join the Navy, but they wouldn't let me. They didn't believe I was a Boy and my school records showed I was a girl. They didn't laugh though, but just said no. I didn't know what to do. I got a job at the local market, cleaning up and stuff. Then I heard about a local school for Business. I asked about it and I could learn to stuff like book keeping and filing systems. I thought this would be okay and I enrolled. I did okay and graduated. After graduation I got a job in a Insurance office and did ok. They had a program for learning Insurance and I applied for it and they taught me about insurance. I had to take a big test and luckily I passed. I was licensed by the state to sell insurance. I felt real good.

I did pretty good at insurance and had been working for the agency for 4 years. I was gonna be celebrating my 22th birthday and my mom and dad was gonna go out to dinner with me for my party. On the day of the party, I had to go way across town to see a new client. It was late when I left the client and walked back to my car. As I got to my car, there was a bunch of guys taking the wheels off it. I shouted at them, but they just acted like they didn't hear nothing. I was gonna go find a pay phone, when I was grabbed from the back. Someone put a arm around my chest and a hand over my mouth. Then I heard someone say "Well, well, well, looky here boys, we got us a little treat". I tried to get away but the person holding me just laughed. Another of the guys grabbed hold of my legs and they carried me to a empty building. The guy holding me by my chest told a couple of them to rip my clothes off. I tried to struggle more, but he pinched my nose shut and I could not breathe. I felt my shoes pulled off and my pants torn off, then I was throwed on the floor and they tore off my shirt. I still had on my underpants, but they laughed cause I didn't have no tits.

One of the guys pulled me up and kissed me, then hit me in the face, hard. I fell and someone pulled off my undies. They pushed me on my back and when they saw my little willy ,they laughed then began kicking and hitting me. They callled me a bunch of names, too. Then, one of them rolled me on my stomach and the next thing I felt was a terrible pain in my butt. The guy had his willy in me and was going back and forth. He made a strange sound and I felt something warm inside me. Then another was doing the same thing to me. a couple of them was playing with their willies and they pointed them at my face and white stuff came out of them. I don't remember how long they raped me, but I remember waking up under a park bench. I had torn clothes tied around me and I felt terrible. I remember thinking I had a bad dream, but when I looked at my body, I knew it was true. I tried to walk, but just fell down. When I woke up, I saw a bright light and I heard a bunch of people. They were arguing about what to do about me. One voice said I was raped, the other said that it was not a crime to rape a man. I wondered what that was about. What was rape? Who got raped?

A man in a doctor coat came over to me and said "That damn flatfoot, he won't do nothing about it. I'm sorry. Maybe if it happened to his kid?" He explained that I was found in the park passed out. I was examined and it was found that I was beat up and raped. There was sperm leaking from my butt and some on my face. He said they cleaned my butt and gave me an emmena thing to wash the stuff out and they cleaned out my stomach with a special tube. The doctor said that a nurse called my parents and they would be here to pick me up. He said I should rest for a few days and he gave me some medicine to take. The doctor asked me if I had any questions for him and I said no. He smiled and told me that I would be staying in the hospital for the rest of theday and he would talk to me later. I thanked him, then just lay there and waited. I never did see mom or dad.

I woke up in the morning in another room. There was a guy in a bed across from me and he just looked my way and grunted. I ignored him. I was still waiting for my mom and dad. A nurse came in the room and said that I could go, but she had me sign some papers first. Then she told me to put my clothes on. I did not know where my clothes were and she got mad. She just handed me a bathrobe and told me to put it on over the hospital sleeping one and I could send it back wafter I got home. I said ok. I was leaving the room, when I saw a police officer. He went into the room and then turned around and came down the hallway after me. He asked my name and I told him. He said he was suposed to take me home. He said that there was a problem at my house and did not say anything else.

There was another policeman at our house. Mom was sitting on the couch as I came in and she got up to hug me. I asked where dad was and she started to cry. The policemen told me that dad had interrupted a robery last night and was shot dead. The robbers had dropped something in the front yard as they left and the policeman showed me my wallet in a plastic bag. The police said that they knew the gang that shot dad and were sorry for our loss. When they heard about my beating and humiliation, they was sorry about that too. Sorry didn't bring dad back!

Things seemed to go down hill after dad was killed. The police may have known who did the deed, but no one was arrested. Mom and I hired a lawyer to help collect the insurance money and thinking about that afterwards, it was not woth it. It cost plenty for the lawyer and we didn't get too much. We did get the house and car. Not much else. I continued to work and mom kept the house clean, but somedays I would come home and she would be crying. She missed dad. This went on for a few years, then one day I came home and she was not there to greet me. When I looked, I found her laying on her bed holding her wedding dress. She was dead. The official report was suicide, but I know she died of a broken heart. I was miserable. My work load has been falling off and finally I was asked to leave the company. They gave me a severance package and said goodbye.

With my parents gone I was lonely. I never had a bunch of friends and didn't like the 'Club' scene. I stayed by myself in that big old house. Finally I realized that I had to get away. I called a realestate person and arranged to sell my house. I took what I wanted and loaded my car and just took off. Destination unknown!

I drove back and forth across the country. I saw the sunrise from the rim of the Grand Canyon and the sunset over the Pacific Ocean. I went to Mount Rushmore and saw the giant sculptures, though I thought the one of Hillary was not quite life like. I visited everywhere, either staying in motels and just camping out. I could sit in a roadside diner for hours just watching people. I must admit though that my life was lacking in companionship. Not even a pet.

I was sleeping in the back seat of my car when I heard a tapping on the window and a light was shining in. It was a deputy sheriff and he told me to get out of the car. He shined a light in my face and inside the car. He asked what I was doing here and I told him "Sleeping". He just nodded his head, then asked for identification. I got my wallet and handed him my Driver's License. He looked at the picture and back at me. He then read the name and again shown the flashlight in my face. I knew what was coming and told him about my name. He asked me to verify some information and was satisfied. He cautioned me that young ladies did not sleep in their cars in parking lots, then realized his mistake. I had heard it all before and thanked him for his concern. That's when he told me about Maggie's Place. A shelter for homeless people. He gave me directions to the shelter and I got back in my car. He waited till I left the parking lot before he pulled out.

To be continued.