I'm sitting here now, lost in memories of a life changing week at the Southern Comfort Conference in Atlanta Georgia in 2009. Having reached the ripe old age of 72, I find myself remembering times and people and events there and in my life.
The 13 hour drive into unknown territories, all the way questioning myself as to whether I actually was doing this? Was I strong enough to do this? This was the very first "vacation" I had taken since getting out of the Air Force in 1974. Here I was, driving a beat up little Ford station wagon through states I'd never even seen, hoping the google maps would keep me on task and on the right roads.
That conference was Life changing because of the experience...because of the wonderful people I met there... because of the chance to meet face to face some great people I only knew from the internet, fellow writers. One is gone now, some still here, all so special to me. Gwen (Khadijah), Grover and Paula, Scotty, Ariel. Holly Happy Hart, who is gone, but never forgotten.
Life changing because I recovered something I'd lost... my faith. That changed also since it cleared up misconceptions of what faith is.
The tears I shed, the smiles and laughter of the people there, the lack of judgement, the acceptance, a particularly tender, caring segment of time I spent with a young girl who was convinced she was a wolf, and the hug I got just for listening and trying to understand her.
The lifelong friends...no...family I found with a special pair of just remarkable folks who accepted me and trusted me and took me into their home as if I was one of their family.
The easy family feeling while interacting with the participants of the con. The special events that I didn't attend, preferring to spend personal time with like minded people in close conversation.
The tears I shed at the end of the con, not wanting such a magical time to end and saying goodbye to those so-special people, those authors whose faces I will never forget.
The 13 hour drive coming home to my own little family and finding the "Welcome Home" banner stretched across the door and my Goddaughter..my little girl to welcome me home with a hug and help carry my luggage into the house.
The whole experience of that Convention has stayed with me all these years afterward and the friendships forged there have sustained me, strengthened me, made me aware of my own self worth. I love them all with all my heart.
The loss after some years after the con of one of the most beautiful souls I have ever had the pleasure of knowing...Holly Happy Hart.
The new friendships I've been so fortunate to find since that long ago conference who have become as close to me as the family I was born into.
All told, I hope I've been as good a friend to them, as they've been to me. I hope also that I've brought some enjoyment to those who liked what I wrote. Everyone who read or commented, or helped me in my quest to BE a writer...none of you will ever truly know how much you helped me become a better person, but know that I hold all of you in a very special place in my heart.
Before I end this 'novella" I have to pay homage to one very special person. The owner and chief cat herder of this remarkable site...Joyce Melton, Erin Halfelven. She has become a kindred soul to me. We are of an age and can talk for hours about things we both remember. She is responsible for my becoming a published author. She has been solely responsible for my having two TWO books published and I am not the only one she has helped to accomplish that distinction.
Erin has, through dint of back breaking labor and personal, financial effort, forged this remarkable site where we can be who we are without judgement or ridicule. She has surpassed all other repositories for TG fiction and encouraged SO many to try their hand at writing and also is responsible for many who would never had the courage to transition had there not been a Big Closet/Top Shelf site.
I have NO intention of shuffling off this mortal coil anytime soon, but I know I've reached that point in life where the mileage on my odometer is greater than what is left on my waranty. I think I've done okay, but the final judge will verify that when the time comes.
God Bless you all and remember to TELL those you love that you love them. You never know when you might never have the chance to tell them again.
I love you all.
Catherine Linda Michel
P.S. As my childhood hero, Mickey Mantle once said: "If I'd known I was gonna live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself."
Comments
72 is not that old
It all depends on how one is taking care of ones body.
And keeping ones mind sharp.
Not so surprising is that retirement is a trap that can ultimately dull your mind.
I am not surprised that writers here of a certain age are still sharper than most and still put out great stuff.
Right behind you.
Back at you. I don't feel old at all. The diagnosis of RA doesn't seem real. Fortunately it's been really mild as long as I behave.
Thanks for being there when I was so broken and nutty. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for our friendship. For reasons I don't understand, I don't connect with many people, so um thanks.
Gwen
I was only half successful with you Gwen.
You're still nutty... and I love all of your nuttiness. There is a thing I learned about being a friend. Being a friend means that you are there NO MATTER WHAT for another person. A person who is worth knowing and respecting.
You were never broken Gwen. just a bit more than bent. I got to know the person behind all that and found someone who I admire and respect. You.
I don't regret one second of getting to know you or being your friend. My only regret is that we live too damned far apart for me to give you a real hug when it's needed... for either of us.
Happy New Year Gwen. You're one of the best. NEVER let anyone tell you different.
Cathy
As a T-woman, I do have a Y chromosome... it's just in cursive, pink script.
Memories
Holly sent pictures to me of that Atlanta meeting. I thank Gwen for calling my first novel to Holly's attention. Holly kindly offered to help me. She did a wonderful job as far as I am concerned. Holly and I corresponded frequently. She confided with me about her cancer diagnosis. I knew she was fatally ill before many did. She hung in there right up to the end. I certainly miss her. We had quite a bit in common. We were from the same state, and I was very familiar with her particular part of the state. We had even been treated by the same doctor. She was very familiar with some of the places I wrote about. We never met one on one. If we had, her death would have hurt even more. Many on BCTS probably never heard of her, but she was a tremendous encourager and supporter of many who are still here. She is dearly missed.
Portia