“Young Hannah?”
…Oh shit!…

My eyes jumped across Thor’s face, my body seemingly frozen place as he’d come ever closer, until finally coming to a stop before me with that same inquisitive look upon his face that he held the whole time he was walking towards me. His face hadn’t changed at all over the last few months, somewhat unsurprisingly, although I thought his thick red hair had grown out a little more, both on his head and around his face in general.

That being said, he also seemed to have obviously made an effort tonight in looking presentable tonight, too, judging by the fact that his thick ceremonial leather armor had been replaced by a rather worryingly well-fitted tux and his hair was plaited into a surprisingly modern-looking braid.

Without any prompting from me he leaned his huge muscular form down and scooped me up in a Fena-worthy hug that took my breath away for the brief moment it lasted. As we pulled apart again, so he could smile at me in a worryingly warm way with his big hands resting on my shoulders.

Something heavy-feeling bumped against my hip, making me flinch visibly in the moment or two it took for me to glance down and confirm that my first instincts on what it could be were thankfully very, very wrong! He may have dressed up nicely tonight, but even a posh political ball isn’t going to separate him from his hammer, Mjǫlnir, small though it may be when compared to most modern depictions of it, in general.

“It is good to see you, young Hannah. It appears my brother has done right by you, as I had hoped. I will admit that it was a surprise to see your name down for an event such as this, although finding that you hold proxy for so many of Arista’s first kin inspires me with some relief over my brother’s motives for doing so to begin with.”
…I honestly have no idea what to say to that…
“Would it be so bold of me to request your hand for the next dance? Such a wonderful dress should not be wasted standing to the side, unattended at your first big ball, after all.”

On some level, I think my brain registered what he was saying, but I was still more than a little mentally frozen at the time and not just because his hammer had accidentally reminded me that I have very specific memories of lying in bed together with this man as his long-suffering yet rather smug wife! Unfortunately, that left my body on a rather pathetic-feeling form of autopilot, apparently, because I found myself nodding along with his suggestion and even reaching out a hand to take his before quite realising what I was doing. He eagerly took my hand with a gentlemanly bow and led me away from the others with more care and poise than I would have honestly expected from the Norse barbarian that he once was.

Just as we reached the dance floor with only a slight delay, thanks to my stupid riding boots and dress slowing me down, I turned and shot a pleading look over at John and Sarah, both of whom were apparently enjoying my latest awkward situation far too much to help me out in the slightest!

We finally entered the rather crowded dance floor properly and my view was cut off by several dancing couples getting in the way, followed quickly by the fact that Thor decided to kick things off by spinning out my rather tiny form, in comparison to his, before pulling me back in to a near perfect waltz position with a big happy grin of obvious enjoyment on his wide face. From there, we began following in classical dance steps that I honestly never thought I’d have to use again after learning them, let alone doing so while taking the female role in things as well.

======

“You are still uncomfortable around me, I see.”

My mind skipped a gear or two, completely breaking the focus I’d previously used to keep time with my steps and not think about what was actually going on right now where I happen to be dancing with an honest-to-Powers god. He was a god that I lied to a lot, the last time we met, and one that seemed far too aware of my emotions, compared to what I would expect given everything I’d heard about his obliviously ‘stupid’ nature in general!

“I fear we may have gotten off to a poor start, young Hannah. I know that I can come across as a little too forward in my exuberance at times, especially when meeting someone new.”
He sighed heavily to himself but didn’t pause in his steps despite that action.
“I will be frank with you, young Hannah. I am aware that you and my brother lied about your parentage when last we met.”
…Uh oh!…

“Much to my ire, I cannot fault either of you for doing so at the time.”
Um… what?

“You were new to our ways and followed my brother’s lead from understandable fear. Meanwhile, Loki wished to keep you for himself while knowing that if I had truly known your future place in our world, then I would have abandoned my admittedly rather childish chase of my minx of a wife in order to better prepare you for what you may face ahead.”
…O-kay?…

“I suspected before, though Loki did well to mask your magic with whatever new technique he may have discovered to do so. But now it is clear to me beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are most assuredly a child of lightning, like myself.”

His face split into yet another wide, happy smile that almost seemed to radiate pride subconsciously, just from the fact that he gets to talk to me like this at all. It’s really hard to maintain a sense of danger and fear when faced with such a wide, openly happy and non-threatening smile, honestly. It’s like trying to be afraid of a large, fluffy dog after it’s decided to come over, lick your face lovingly and settled at your feet for a nice, long, lazy sleep!

“Because we are kin of such a rare kind, I will be candid with you in a way that I would not with others, even my trickster of a brother. Lightning mages are disappointingly few in my experience, and I have no doubt that you have suffered in much the same way I did while growing into your powers. It may take one as young as you a while to see it for the blessing it truly is, but know that we lightning mages all hold a natural edge over our peers because of our rough childhoods.”

…I think I see where he’s going with this one, at last…

“I am not the fool I would have others believe me to be. I have worked hard, especially when my brother is involved, to cultivate the idea that my childhood problems in each incarnation never truly go away. There is, after all, no sharper weapon than that wielded by one thought a fool.”

…Yup, definitely saw that one coming…
Powers! I hate it when stuff like this happens!

“To wit, I would like to take the time we have with you being here as representative to my first kin, for the greater good, to help progress your training at an expedited rate which I myself could only have dreamed of, once upon a time.”

Uh—he what now?
…He’s saying he wants to train us in lightning magic, dumbass!…
Oh…ooh!

Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes, YES!

My sudden excitement at the idea of having some real, practical help in finally getting a handle on my new element, a problem I’d honestly started to get a bit worried about managing without Edith’s usually mean but also pretty effective aid in doing so, must have shown on my face in some way, because his smile somehow got even brighter than the already overly happy grin he’d been effortlessly maintaining for so long now.

“I promise that you will come to love the often looked down upon power within you, young Hannah. There is no feeling more exhilarating than riding the lightning itself and feeling the power of a storm rumble deep within your chest!”

Well, this whole conversation is certainly looking up.
…The only thing better than free training is free food…
Powers, I’m hungry, now that I think about it..

“With that point agreed, I feel it is in my duty as your temporary tutor and hopefully eternal kin, to point out that there are several men who have unwisely tried to force their attentions and agendas upon you through less than acceptable means this night.”

He shifted us both into a half-turn, mid-dance step, and ended up with us both facing towards the bar through an unusually well-timed gap in the people dancing around us that part of me finds highly suspicious from the timing alone, honestly.

“You are under my brother’s protection and, questionable intentions aside as always when he is involved, I will honor my brother’s good works when he feels the odd need to commit them, young Hannah.”
He twisted us around again so his back was to the bar, possibly in order to hide his next words from anyone who may be watching or able to read lips.
“Our dance is almost at an end and I would ask that you have your maidservant, the Lady Diana, discreetly bring those spoilt drinks they tried to ensnare you with from your table, back to the bar. I shall have words with them on your behalf, as family and tutors are privileged to do at events such as this.”

…Oh! This is gonna be good!…
—Or it’ll be very, very bad!

As I told Sarah earlier, the magical world has its own rather dated set of etiquette and rules that are expected to be followed, especially at political events like this. Thanks to those archaic rules, as a supposed Lady, I cannot outright accuse or offend the assholes at the bar by pointing out that they tried to bloody drug me. Still, that doesn’t mean a direct male relation, or in this case a now accepted temporary mentor, can’t put them in their place for me.

Maybe this is another example of my having spent too much time around John lately, but there’s something I need to say first, before allowing this possible idiocy to continue any further.

“Thor, don’t kill them—okay?”

Thankfully, the big guy honestly seemed momentarily shocked by my request, although that quickly faded into just resignation, as he obviously made the connection between what I’d said and who I’ve been hanging around with lately, instead.

“In my favored incarnation we had a word for men like them, níðingr, those whom would perversely hunt one as young as you for personal gain. Their punishment was often to be sodomised by the most craven of our blood-thirsty warriors until they begged for death or, at the very least, castration as an alternative.”

I couldn’t help but cringe at the almost burning rage that entered his voice as he spoke of those ancient men who he obviously despises to this day for the apparent child abusers that they were. I don’t really see how that applies in this situation, but still—

“However, as you wish, I will not go so far. My feelings on the matter do not change at all, though. You, young Hannah, are a fresh-born of our kin. Less than a century to your name, you are but a babe-in-arms to most of our kind’s definition and for them to even jokingly attempt magics against you is something which cannot go unpunished.”

A shudder went down my spine at the cold tone of voice the usually happy and bright sounding Thor ended on there, a shudder so strong that it even overpowered my initial reaction of annoyance at being basically called a ‘baby’ in his eyes due to the fact that everyone believes, sort of partly correctly, that I’ve never had a previous incarnation before and that I’m the world’s first Hannah Cooper instead of its latest Arista.

Before I could quite get a handle on my mixed feelings at being essentially coddled by Thor, even if it does work towards my advantage in one degree or another, our current dance ended and he took a step back from me to offer a polite bow as he took up my hand again to apparently lead me back to the others, as a gentleman is apparently supposed to do in this kind of situation.

======

I’m honestly not sure what expression was on my face as we approached our table again, but it couldn't have been entirely good, judging by the concern that was so painfully obvious on both John and Sarah’s faces as we came back into speaking range.

“Young Sarah, Lady Diana, I leave young Hannah in your assuredly capable hands. I hope to see you both soon.”

Just to add insult to injury, Thor turned and raised our joined hands to press a gentle kiss to the back of mine before giving our slightly stunned audience a mild head-nod of a bow and leaving us to talk alone at last, with his destination obviously being the bar, where the men who’d been trying to slip me drinks earlier were in the process of realising that their prey was finally back within reach once more.

“Han, what exactly did you say to him t—?”

Before John could even finish questioning me on my talk with Thor, Sarah cut across him in order to ask a much more pressing question, at least to her mind.

“Who the hell is Lady Diana?”
Despite asking that question, her eyes were firmly fixed on John for possibly obvious reasons as she said it, in a not so subtle indication that she already suspected what the answer would be from the context or our latest revelations about John’s past feminine experiences as Artemis.
…Oh, Artemis—that makes sense, actually…
“Come to think of it, wasn’t Artemis called ‘Diana’ in the Roman Pantheon?”

Huh? Who knew a vague recollection of our rather lack-lustre history class’s introduction to Greek and Roman mythology would come in handy for Sarah someday, after all?
…Either that or just the fact she deals in antiquities a lot at work…
There is that, too, I suppose.

“Can we not go into the messy backstory behind the Graeco-Roman religious divide right now?”

Oh, I’m sorry. Are we hitting a nerve at all, John-Boy?
…Definitely. A big, feminine nerve we need to hit more often from now on for the sheer fun of it!…

“I’m more worried over what he said to you about the last time you met, honestly, Han. It looked like the pair of you were having a pretty deep discussion at points out there.”

This time Sarah’s attention turned on me with obvious scrutiny being paid to my face in search of any clues to what may have been going on out there on the dance floor that she could have missed. Part of me just wants to shrug them both off. But I guess that will make it harder to explain to ‘Lady Diana’ why I need him to take all these drinks back to the bar before Thor either decides to come back and find out what’s going on or, more likely, to go with his possible alternative idea for punishing them, which would involve far too much non-consensual buggery in a public place for my liking!

“Okay, here’s what happened…”

=====

“And that’s why I need you to take these drinks back to the bar pronto, John-Boy.”

I may have skipped over the whole Thor-isn’t-as-much-of-an-idiot-as-he’d-like-you-to-believe part, of course. That’s his secret to tell and I can appreciate a good, long-con trick for what it is, especially when it’s done in order to make your potential enemies underestimate you, considering that’s pretty much my bread-and-butter when it comes to fighting in general most of the time.

“I’m not sure if I should be annoyed or impressed that you managed to convince that idiot to teach you his lightning magic tricks after only five minutes of dancing with him, honestly?”

Yup, that’s fine by me, John-Boy, as long as you believe it’s true and don’t feel the need to look any further into the why behind his choice to help me than strictly necessary.

“This might be a stupid question, but why didn’t he recognise you for being—ya know—you, John?”

I cut my eyes over to Sarah again and paused for a second, because she really did bring up a rather good point there, honestly. Why didn’t Thor see right through John’s rather thin disguise as Artemis or Diana, apparently, just on sight alone like Lilith did before him?

“Looks don’t come into it, generally. Considering how drastically someone can change from incarnation to incarnation, Hannah for example—”
Aah, I always love being used as an example, John-Boy.
…Don’t forget he’s the reason we changed so drastically!…
“Names and magic are the defining trait most of us ‘older’ mages use to tell each other apart. In the same way that Hannah’s magically recognised name changed from Arista’s to her own, apparently, mine has changed from Max to Artemis for some unfathomable reason that I completely expect will turn out to be Hannah’s fault.”

Hey!

“Thor’s always been good at detecting people’s magic, even without a naming spell like the announcer used before letting us in here earlier. I’ve got a theory he does it through some advanced application of his lightning magic, but it really is just a theory and a weak one at that, considering how much of an idiot he is most of the time.”

…Maybe not as much of an idiot as you think, John-Boy…

It’s kind of ironic when you think about it, the idea that Thor has been intentionally pulling the wool over the eyes of his supposedly master-of-manipulation-and-trickery brother, Loki, for who-can-count-how-many centuries.

Now that I’m calming down from the initial fear of him wanting to talk to me, let alone to dance with me, I can’t help but respect the level of commitment it must take from him, all in order to keep a competitive edge over his enemies. I can play up the ‘ditz’ act at times. Even back when I was Al, it wasn’t exactly an uncommon thing for me to do a lot of the time, because, above all else, it tends to work far more than you’d think in most cases, luckily. Even with years of experience and a certain liking I have for entering most situations with everyone underestimating me, though, I really don’t think I could stand being practically a joke to most people, intellectually speaking, on a daily basis, let alone for millennia at a time!

“Either way, if magic says, ‘I’m Artemis and I don’t feel like Max’, to this lot, then most of them will just run with it. Lilith is kinda the exception because she’s an expert in psychological profiling and she knows me far too well not to pick up who I am instantly, let alone the fact that she was one of my aunts back during my Artemis incarnation, so she’s also in a pretty small group who actually know I’m even connected to that particular goddess to start with.”

Okay, okay, we get it, John-Boy. Weird magic changes for you are weird and therefore people ignore them, pretty standard operating procedures with mages in my experience, sadly. Don’t get me wrong. I’m sure when I finally have time to sit down and process all the implications involved in today’s little revelation, it’s probably going to hit me pretty hard, but at the moment we have other things to focus on, speaking of which…

“We’ll talk about the logic of magical idiocy later, John. At the moment, Thor is waiting for a batch of tainted drinks to be delivered by you, ‘Diana’, to the bar as soon as possible.”

John opened his mouth to respond, probably in order to say something either stupid or unhelpful, knowing him, but the glint of mischief and possibly even anticipation I could feel escaping me as I stared at him were apparently enough to quell any arguments he may have built up in his head for once.

“Fine, I guess. Thor trying to be intimidating around here should be fun to watch, if nothing else.”

That being said, John turned back to face our table and with a decisive flick of his wrist, all the tainted drinks on our table rose into the air, following him as he made his way towards the bar without another word.

“Come on, Sare. I want to get a better view to make sure I don’t have to step in and stop either John or Thor from hurting someone unreasonably.”

She shot me an odd look and her eyes tightened down as she digested my words, a process that seemed almost painful for her to do for some reason in the few seconds it took.

“You know they tried to drug you, right Han?”

Uh, yeah, I do, Sare. That’s why I’m letting Thor step in and show them the error of their ways, within a certain degree of acceptable punishments, at least.

“I’ll be honest, Han, my first instinct was to outright kill them for even trying that on you. It’s not just an affront to you, but an affront to all women, and not exactly a good sign for what they consider acceptable behavior around here, either, come to that.”

Oh, please! This sort of thing is routine around here. It’s even worse in other countries. I lost count of the number of times someone tried to drug me into submission with a “friendly” drink during my brief time within the Canadian Royal Citadel!

These guys are barely classifiable as amateurs when compared to any one of the Canadian princesses who made an attempt at catching Al for their own while they could, honestly. Hell, I’m almost convinced the only reason I even caught a few of them at all is that they had to follow decorum due to my favored status with the King at the time.
…Either that or Princess Nova had already stamped her claim on us in a pre-empted arranged marriage kind of way…
Oh, Powers forbid!

The last thing I need is to find out she had enough brain cells in her head to plan something out that far ahead of time and—

======

“Han, what if it was me or Eris they’d tried to drug with love or lust potions?”

My head snapped up sharply to glare at the world in general as Sarah’s question registered in my mind and almost automatically lead to scenes playing out across my mind’s eye that lit a fire in my chest with each worsening possibility that followed them.

“If they’d have tried anything against you two, they’d be dead already!”

The words practically dripped out of my mouth in a low, guttural growl that hardly suits my current appearance, but I neither cared, nor noticed at first. It was only when Sarah put her hand carefully on my arm, making my eyes snap over to her worried face again that I even realised my body had gotten so tense and my fists had balled into painfully tight balls at my side which shook from the force of my restrained anger, with each passing second.

“Now do you see why this is one of the few times I’m willing to sit back watching as a Norse god of Thunder and John—goddamned—Jones go in to defend your honor with potentially lethal force, Han?”

Slowly I started coming back to myself, my brain belatedly realising that all the events which had flashed through my mind were just imaginary and hadn’t actually happened at all. My fists eased open again and my muscles un-tensed as well, but the shaking wouldn’t stop, even as I flexed my fingers a few times in an attempt to find my center once more under Sarah’s ever-watchful eye.

“They shouldn’t have to kill for me…”
I’m not worth it.

“They care about you, Han. John especially, as much as it pains me to admit it, and just as your first response to a threat like this against me or Eris was a bit—less than rational?—so will theirs be, I’m afraid. All we can do is go over there and try to keep things from getting too out of hand right now for your sake instead of theirs. But again, imagine if I tried to stop you from hurting someone who tried to do this crap to me or Eris, huh?”

…She’s got a point…
Powers damn it! When did Sarah have to become the logical one of the two of us?
…About the time we became the emotional one, I’d imagine…
Probably, as annoying as that idea is.

“Fine—”

With a huff of breath I straightened myself up to my admittedly rather pathetic full height and squared my shoulders as best I could to regain what little poise I have in me in general.

“Fine, let’s get over there before things get too out of hand—Thanks, Sare.”

She offered me a wide, relieved grin and nudged my shoulder with her own before grabbing me by the elbow and tugging me over to the bar with more enthusiasm than I’m honestly able to bring up, myself, in the wake of the emotional rollercoaster I just went on at the very thought of someone trying to hurt Sarah or Eris in a similar way to what they tried to use on me.

I know it’s not logical and that it’s hypocritical at best for me to even try to say, ‘It’s fine when it’s me.’ But damn it all! It is me and there is a big difference between someone trying to pull this crap on me and someone trying this crap against them, no matter what logic or Sarah might have to say about it all!

======

“What are you doing, John-Boy?”

He turned away from the bar he’d been leaning on so he could speak in a quiet tone with the bartender who’d offered me a sympathetic look earlier, while they both watched events taking place at the other side of the bar, passing a bottle of something expensive-looking between themselves, as if to add insult to injury.

“Sitting back and waiting for the hilarity to start. I never knew Thor had it in him, Han. Apparently, protecting you brings out a sadistic side of him I’ve never gotten to see before. He took all those drinks you had me bring back and is currently in the process of proposing a toast in his usual meat-headed way.”
…Oh, no…
He can’t do that!
“Don’t worry, I checked, nothing in them is potent enough to last much more than twenty-four hours at most. It’s just going to be amazing to watch them all make horny, lovestruck fools of themselves for the karma of it all if nothing else.”

I opened my mouth to give my, honestly, rather conflicted opinion on what is about to happen. But before I could say anything, a great cheer of male voices went up and I turned just in time to see the lot of them downing the now re-glassed drinks before them in one go, like shots of spirits rather than the half-pint sized glasses of cocktailed ingredients they really are.

His job done, Thor turned around with his apparently untainted tankard of beer still at his lips as he offered us a thumbs-up with his free hand and started making his way over to us instead. Behind him the men, almost as one, started gagging on their drinks in the few seconds it took for those drinks to kick in and eliminate any trace of their building panic before it could really catch too much attention from the mingling people around them. They didn’t go unnoticed for long though.

The first sign that something was going on for anyone not already watching them in growing horror, was the fact that one of the older men turned on the spot and promptly swooped the man next to him into his arms for a loving embrace that quickly progressed into a rather overly dramatic-looking dip-and-kiss maneuver that I'm pretty sure was taken straight out of some kind of classic movie, like ‘Gone with the Wind’, in all but the genders involved, at least.

From there, things really did get a little crazy, quite a lot of the men seeming to pair up instinctively while an unfortunate few of them broke off to start hassling the crowd around them, in ways that led to more than a few equally instinctive kicks and punches from the poor men and women they approached on general principle alone. Several designated ‘negotiators’, bodyguards, and even my own team of soldiers moved in to restrain the obviously delirious men pretty damn quickly.

This all led to a rather amusing, for me, moment where one of the men noticed Pauly barking orders authoritatively to everyone around him and took an instant liking to his obvious aura of command. Even a lust potion isn’t enough to completely overthrow a human beings natural sense of self-preservation, luckily, a limitation that couldn’t have been more evident than the moment where the potion-addled man stopped short of diving at Pauly, because he found himself with a gun planted firmly to his forehead, held in the tense hand of my gruff head of security in all his aged ex-army glory.

“Young Hannah, I believe now would be a good time for us to leave this party before too many questions are asked about ‘who served what to who’, yes?”
My eyes drifted from the rather horrifying mess unfolding in front of us over to the subtly amused looking face of Thor in a lost state of awe that I couldn’t help but feel show visibly on my face as well.
“I will see you at the swearing-in ceremony tomorrow, of course, but afterwards we should make time to organise those lessons I offered as well.”

My tongue didn’t quite want to cooperate, annoyingly, but I managed a rather stilted nod which made his smile widen ever so slightly more in response. He turned to leave the technical crime scene we were currently loitering in before turning back around and moving towards John, quickly scooping him up in a big hug that actually managed to lift my now bewildered best friend off his feet in the process.

“It is nice to see you again, Lady Diana. You honor your new mistress with your aid this day. I’m sure your mother would be proud of you, even if your father would obviously not approve.”

His piece said, Thor offered Sarah a little nod of acknowledgement and turned towards the stairs leading out of the ballroom at last, only pausing for a moment or so to aim one of the suddenly companionless men towards a rather beefy-looking older gentleman in the corner who honestly looked like he was quite ready, willing, and able to knock the drugged idiot out when he inevitably got within swinging range in a few seconds time thanks to Thor’s intervention.

“Han, I don’t know what you did to Thor, but is it wrong that I want to put the two of you together constantly in the future just on the off chance you might affect him even more, given more time to work on him?”

Sarah laughed to herself lightly in response to his awe-filled question. I tried to answer in my own way as well but before I could a pair of now recognisable arms, connected to an equally recognisable pair of overly large breasts, wrapped around me with an airy giggle that sent a chill down my spine for multiple reasons.

“I knew you’d be fun after what you did to Ari-Ari, Hannah darling. But even I didn’t see this one coming. You are now, officially, my favorite little niece-like daughterling!”

As if to emphasis her point, she gave me a tight squeeze that practically wedged my head between her breasts in a disconcertingly comfortable way and let off yet another airy giggle that practically vibrated through my skull as it went on.

“Who would have thought you could do more to corrupt that honor-bound fool, Thor, in five minutes of dancing than I’ve managed in the last fourteen centuries? Save me a seat at the table tomorrow, pretty girl. I want to have a front-row seat to whatever wonderful chaos you’re going to manage in advance!”

The arms and adjoining breasts around me came loose at last, followed quickly by one last airy giggle as Lilith walked away, apparently far too amused by what she believes I managed to do here to even bother teasing John on the way out, as well.

Before I’d quite gotten myself back together again from Lilith’s far too touchy-feely for my tastes approach, let alone the words she’d uttered at the same time and all their disturbing implications, I was once again assaulted by a new pair of feminine arms and bigger-than-mine breasts as someone latched onto me from behind once more. Between the seemingly full-body leather visible on the new woman’s arms and the feeling of her helmet covered head nuzzling against my neck like an overgrown cat, it wasn’t hard to work out who it was, luckily.

“Paul says it’s time to go, Han. He’s gone to go get Rosemary and Trudy together at the moment. He told me to come lead you all out of here with Eris while he’s busy.”
As if to complement her words, a small weight made itself known against my dress-covered leg before moving on quickly at Sarah’s behest to settle on her hip in a way that made that annoyingly maternal part of me flinch internally just on general principle alone.
“Come on, Han. Let’s blow this party and get you out of that stupid corset for the night, huh? I bet they’ve restocked our rooms with more of those chocolates you like so much and did you know your room specifically has a big TV of its own we can watch movies on while relaxing in your huge bed too?”

My eyes trailed across the ballroom full of stuffy, politically savvy mages with a slight pause to wince when one of the still drugged men from earlier broke free of his restraints and made a break across the room for someone else who had obviously caught his attentions. His break away lead to a surge of movement as people gave chase and almost inevitably lead to several more drugged mages breaking loose in the confusion to start the cycle of chaos all over again.

“Yeah, alcoholic chocolates and bad TV in bed sounds amazing right about now. Lead on, Fena.”

She didn’t need any more encouragement and quickly set to work steering me through the crowd of leaving party guests along the stairway, with the others trailing behind us as we went.

“So, who was that new woman with the huge—uh, I mean, the one with the silver hair, ya know? She seemed to be getting awfully close to you, in my opinion.”

Fena’s fingers splayed out on my shoulders and moved with almost mocking slowness to rest around my collar bone in a possessive manner before she continued in an overdone bedroom coo that I honestly didn’t know she could do until now, especially with the helmet in the way, slightly muffling her voice as usual, lately.

“You’re not cheating on me, are you Han? I’m not sure my poor little undead heart could take it if you were cheating on me with another woman—well, aside from John, apparently. But even I can’t deny the chemistry between you two, and I’m sure he’ll make an excellent thrall for all your male-related needs when it comes time for us to venture forth and take over the world at long last as evil queen of darkness and her lesbian vampire-pet love slave—”

She probably had more to say on the topic at hand, one she was obviously enjoying playing with to an almost worrying degree as her fingers did a rather good impression of Lilith’s from earlier this evening in running gentle caresses along my ribs. I was almost starting to naively worry that she wasn’t actually joking about any of the things she’d just said when her fingers twitched slightly and suddenly shot down into one of my most ticklish spots that seems to have come over into this new body from my days as Al, namely my ribs just below my new breast-line.

With an undignified squeal, I collapsed instinctively to the side and Fena took the chance to sweep me off my feet, practically raising me above her head like a villain you might see in old black-and-white movie with her vampire strength as she ran down the hallway towards the elevators, much to the confusion of everyone around us and my growing embarrassment.

“First one to our floor gets to ravish Hannah in every way imaginable at their leisure, John-Boy!”
What? Please tell me she’s joking!
…She’s joking—I think?…