Brian thought that he was hiding his true nature in school from everyone,
but soon, something he had never planned on happening began.
Someone was after him!
Hide and Seek
Part 1

by Valerie Preston

---

 
Author's Note: Sometimes I get into those moods where I feel like a quickie to type out for my fans, and then I get the one-off one where I feel like maybe stretching my fantasy a little longer. It's been a long while since I have last posted for you all, so hold your breath! I'm going to let my imagination run wild in an entirely new way. I hope the steaminess later on doesn't get your panties in a bunch. ~StacyInLove (Would-Be)
 
 

 

Part 1.

Brian Smith had been a very moody person for some time. He knew his mother had first noticed it when he was 9 years old. He did his best to keep putting up excuse after excuse and avoided talking about it. Her several attempts to try and break the ice with him had nearly aged him twenty years in fright. He could never, ever, reveal his dark secret to her! The shame and humiliation would be more than he could bear!

The urges had really begun half a year earlier when he began noticing the cute clothing the girls in his school were wearing. The clothing seemed to call out to him with an air of mysticism. He felt that he needed to wear clothing like them. No, that was wrong, he was one of them. A she.

And she deserved to wear clothing just like any other girl.

“Oh my God!” Brian thought to himself, “What do I do?” First panic, then the accompanying shame caused him to blush in both happiness in learning what had been wrong with himself all of this time and the fear of being found out by others. But now that he had identified his problem, how would he solve it?

“Brian,” Shelly whispered in his ear, “What's wrong? You looked like you went a little pale there?”

Embarrassed at being caught in his mind drift, Brian weakly smiled, “Ummm, nothing really. Just didn't have any breakfast this morning and I'm try to think of what to eat at the cafeteria for lunch.”

Shelly didn't really believe him but Brian had always clammed up and became a loner. It's like he was always afraid of people.

Over the next few days, Brian, with a newfound determination, used his computer to look up his problem on the internet. A transsexual – one whose mind or being did not match what their outside body appeared sexually. Along the lines of research he came across was the regulations and procedures for going about trying to correct it. It was ungodly expensive! And so many doctor visits with many psychiatrists and practitioners. He would have to be 18 before he could get the surgery! He couldn't afford it! Brian's heart dropped.

While feeling let down, he casually came across a website called Fictionmania. Fictional stories about people changing their sex, some willingly, and others having it done unto them for punishment. But as Brian began reading the various stories of characters wanting to voluntarily transition, he found that those stories really pulled on his heart. He became drawn into the world of changing one's sex. He realized that these characters were just like him! Of course, he knew the differences between boys and girls, and he knew in his mind and heart that he was the opposite sex of boys.

It was then that he noticed an advertisement at the top of the page: At-Home Pharmacy. You could buy a range of drugs from them in various amounts. Brian nervously clicked on the advertisement. It brought him to a page that beheld a variety of disorders and he then he saw it! Hormone therapy! He knew this term is what was part of the process of transitioning from a male to a female from the research he had been doing online.

He clicked the link.

The page that came up next was further divided into male hormone therapy, and female. He clicked on the female hormone therapy link. To his utter amazement, he saw a variety of hormone brands and types. He then began comparing prices and amounts and finally narrowed down to a combination pill of both estrogen and progesterone. The best bargain was a one year supply. The cost was a little hefty at $140, but he had saved up his allowance and helping his neighbors with their chores he had a total of $96 and some odd change. To pay, he would need either a credit card of some type or a Paypal account with a bank. That meant he would need to ask his mother to use her card for the purchasing since he did not have a bank account yet.

How would he be able to purchase these and not let her know?

He sat that there for many minutes staring at his desktop computer. Then the idea hit him!

Brian hopped down the stairs and explained to his mother that the ram slots in his motherboard were going bad and that he needed to purchase a new board. He added that he had found the replacement board online to be cheaper than what the local computer shop could get it for him at $140. He showed his mother the money he had saved up for forever and that he would give it to her and pay the remainder back to her weekly as he did his normal yard work for his neighbors and helping out the old couple that lived a few houses down. Mrs. Smith thought it over and felt that if it would help keep her son happy, then it would be worth it. She dug into her purse and then handed Brian her credit card.

Brian, smiling to no end, thanked his mother and dashed back upstairs towards his room, leaving all his hard earned cash on the couch beside his mother.

“Be sure to bring it right back down when you are through placing the order!” she hollered as she neatly packed Brian's money into her wallet.

“Will do Mom!” came the response from up the stairs.
 
 
Brian, hardly believing his luck at being able to do this, had to lightly slap his face a couple of times to bring himself back down to reality. This had to be a dream! This couldn't happen in real life!

He clicked on the one year supply of the combination pills and went to the checkout page. He carefully read that the items would be shipped in an unmarked cardboard box for privacy, with the company logo tag on the shipping label as “At-Home Ltd.” That seemed like that was pretty well covered to ensure his mother did not realize what it was that he was buying. He then remembered it had to come shipped in a box shaped like one that a motherboard was sold in. Scanning the checkout page there was a text field for special instructions. He typed in:
 

“Please ship my order in a computer motherboard box or one that is similar in size. This is very important.”

 
 
He then clicked the Place Order button. Several moments went by and Brian was nervously sweating. Just when he felt like he couldn't take it anymore, the new page came up showing that his order was complete and that a receipt copy was sent to his email account.

Excitement enraptured his very being! At long last, he had taken matters into his own hands and would slowly become the girl that he knew that he was inside! He was so giddy and dazed that he fell back onto his bed and bounced a couple of times. Thoughts about his hair and what style he would like began flooding his brain. Nails, what color? Oh yeah! Clothes too!

Days went by and as Brian went to school, and did his weekly work for his neighbors, people began to notice a change in his demeanor. The dreamy smile that ever so often appeared on his face caught the attention of many. He also appeared more energetic and conscious of others. After some of the neighbors had complimented him more out of the blue than normal, Brian soon realized that he had to keep his outward appearance like he had always been or that he would be found out.

After having paid his mother back the remainder of what he had owed her, Brian then began his mission to become a girl! He rode his bicycle down to the local pharmacy store and locked his bike up outside. Once in he went over to the magazine section and pulled out a few fashion magazines like Seventeen, Glamour, and few others. He checked out the articles on nails and colors and then proceeded over to the makeup aisle. Some light red varnish and a clear-coat cover were gathered. Some facial wash pads he picked up along with a hair-volumizing conditioner and a matching shampoo. Finally, he picked a small four pack of lady's razors.

Brian had noticed the stockings on the end aisle but realized that girls his age wore leggings. So that was a no-go. That meant either Target or Wal-Mart. Brian reasoned that he would have to go about this slowly and in stages. After all, this had to remain a secret.

At the register, Brian was again inwardly nervous somewhat about his purchases being looked at by the clerk. The man, while not outwardly showing anything odd about the items being purchased, smiled back at him and said, “That will be $23.75.”

Brian was unconsciously studying the man. His clean crew cut styled sandy hair, the way the eyes were framed by his slightly tanned skin, his face, the strength his arms had from the large musc... Ooops! He was talking to me!

“Umm, could you repeat that please?” Brian bashfully asked as he pulled out his wallet.

“$23.75.” he repeated, “Do you have a rewards card with us?”

“I don't,” Brian sheepishly answered, biting his lower lip as he handed the clerk the money.
 
 
Outside, the store, as he unlocked the chain through his bike, he noticed on the sidewalk, a shadow of someone that had been walking towards him and stop next to him. Brian turned around and looked up.

“Hi! My name's Robert Jones, but I usually go by Bobby.”

Brian, clenching the bag together to block the view inside it, smiled, “My name is Brian.” Brian then noticed that Bobby seemed to be checking him out. He saw Bobby's eyes flicker and a strange look befell his face.

“Do you live around here?” he then asked Brian.

“Sure, just over that way on Maple Street.”

A grin covered Bobby's face as he then next said, “Well I guess we are neighbors then. We just moved in today on the corner house at the end of Maple Street - the blue one. You aren't too far away then.”

For some reason, Brian did not feel compelled to try and blow off Bobby like he did so many people that tried to become friends with him. His dark secret of being a girl and the fear of what others would do to him if it were ever discovered kept him in battle mode. Bobby's charm and friendliness seemed somehow different to him. That, and the fact Bobby was a few inches taller, stronger than himself, and seemed genuinely interested in becoming friends with him sort of disarmed his internal defense systems. Cautiously, Brian raised himself up onto the bike seat and looked back over towards Bobby.

“Hey,” Bobby exclaimed, “Can you wait just a minute for me? I came here to grab a couple of 2 liters of cola for our celebration dinner. We ordered out for pizza and chicken wings. You are invited to come over too if you like?”

Brian internally fought against the comfortableness that Bobby was pouring on him. It was strange feeling he was experiencing. A friend? An interest in him? Like a girl would her boyfriend? No, that wasn't it either. It was more like an interesting friend! Okay, I'll give it a shot!

“Okay. I'll wait here for you,” he offered as he looked into Bobby's blue eyes, “But I will have to check with my mother before accepting. I'll ride back with you to your house first though.”

“Super! I'll be back out in a jiff!” Bobby hurriedly replied as he dashed inside the pharmacy.
 
 
Brian was sitting there balancing his bicycle while deep in thought. Why am I becoming friends with a perfect stranger? It's dangerous if he finds out. But he seems like a really nice guy too. Hmm. I know I am going to get the third degree from Mom when she hears I have a friend. My image that I need to maintain towards everyone else will get more complicated. Well, you only live life once, so what the heck?

Also, Bobby did look me over, as if searching for something. What gives there? It was a little uncomfortable but I don't think he saw anything in the bag.

Brian let a silly grin ply across his face as he thought about Bobby's features. He realized that it was actually becoming easier for him to fantasize about the opposite sex. To a normal boy, this should be hideous and revolting to even think this way. But for as long as he could remember, ever since he was forced into separations from the girls; from playing with girls at the beginning of first grade in school and into separate activities and separate restrooms, he rebelled at the thought of being lumped in with the other boys. It was wrong!

Brian even remembered what his teacher Ms. Dearborn had told him when he scoffed at being put into groups with the boys for class activities, “My dear, you are a boy. Boys are not girls. You will have to get used to being with the other boys. It's only natural.” That statement echoed in his mind and that was when he realized that something about him was wrong. What the adults were forcing him to do felt really wrong with him. He even asked his mother that night when he came home about what had happened at school that day.

His mother explained, “Well, as you get older, boys and girls need to be separated for different things. It is a part of growing up and until you become an adult, certain things need for boys and girls to be separated. Like using the restroom for example. Being left alone together unsupervised, that dear, with some boys or girls that are mischievous, could lead to awful trouble. So, don't let it bother you. Things are like that for a good reason.”

His mother had rubbed his hair and smiled.

But still, that did not answer his questions and it led to the feeling he should keep quiet about this and not say anything nor ask anyone again until he learned what was wrong with him and how to fix why he felt the way he did. To Brian, it was totally wrong to feel being away from the girls. He was more scared and afraid to participate with the boys.

But now, he properly knew why. He was a girl after all!
 
 
A light pat on his back shook him from his daydreaming.

“Okay. I'm all set. Let's head back.” Bobby slung the double bagged colas over his shoulder and walked along beside Brian while he slowly pedaled to keep his balance and not cause Bobby to have to walk at a more brisk pace.

Bobby began telling him about his favorite console games and hobbies and likes. It seemed that Bobby was a more active person than he was. He liked activities like running, swimming, soccer, console games, and fantasy / sci-fi / action movies. Brian was more of a closeted computer nerd that studied and did not do much else. Hmm. Differences can be worth exploring. Bobby's house soon came into view.

The moving van was parked in the driveway and the movers were almost done as the van was nearly empty. The front door was open and inside could be seen stacks of boxes, furniture in the general paces that they should be with wrapping paper and tape still on some of it.

Brian dismounted his bike and kick-standed it beside the garage entrance.

“My parents are probably out back. My dad was setting up the lawn furniture when I left for the drinks,” Bobby grinned and grabbed Brian's hand, pulling him along through the open front door of his house.

“Hey Dad? Is it okay for me to invite over a friend to eat dinner with us?” he yelled. We then entered the den and saw the sliding patio door open with both of Bobby's parents sitting around an ornate metal lawn table signing the packing list and receipt for the movers.

“Sure son. One minute,” Mr. Jones replied.

Bobby then let go of Brian's hand and they moved over to the empty chair beside the table. Brian stood there looking around at the yard, how much larger it was then ours being a good sized corner lot. The newer wooden privacy fence bordered it keeping casual passersby from peeking into the backyard. A large in ground pool with the water pump gurgling away drew my attention like a bee homing onto a flower! Oh man! Pool time!

Bobby tapped Brian's arm. “Go ahead Bri and have a seat.”

Brian countered, “You should probably take it Bobby since I have to ride back and ask my mom.”

Bobby then turned the chair to face the seat towards me more and bowed, “I must insist that you should have the throne your excellency.”

Oh-My-God! He just did not do that... did he?

Brian blushed a crimson red and decided to sit down while both his mother and dad laughed at his performance. The movers put the paperwork into their clipboard and walked back over to the van. The noises made as the moving van door was closed and the powered back ramp was being put away were heard.

“I'm Robert Jones Sr.” Bobby's father said reaching over the table and heartily shaking my hand.

“I'm Angela Jones, Bobby's mother,” She almost sang as she more lightly took my hand and made my acquaintance.

“I'm Brian Smith. I ran into Bobby here at the pharmacy. Would it be okay for me to ask my mother if I could stay for dinner with you all?”

“Sure thing Brian,” He agreed and began to fish out a flip phone from his pocket.

“Umm,” Brian stammered, really needing to get back home and stash away the precious loot he purchased, “I don't live far down the street. I need to drop these off first at home.” He held up the closed bag.

“Okay Brian,” Mrs. Jones smiled, “Ask your parents to come back with you. It would be quite nice to meet our new neighbors.”

Saved!

“Will do Mrs. Jones!” Brian smiled back and then stood up to leave. Bobby walked silently behind Brian as he made his way around the side of the house to the fence gate next to the garage and unlatched it to open. The moving van, now gone, left the driveway totally clear. Brian slipped back onto his bike, still holding the bag with his purchases and keenly aware that Bobby was still watching him. He seemed like he was going to accompany him home.

Brian then began, “Bobby. I'll be right back.”

“I know that,” he grinned, “But you said you live close and I kinda wanted to see where.”

Brian rolled his eyes. “Bobby you are so weird.”

“No more weirder than you!” he laughed.

Okay, I give up. He can come along.

They rode along slowly again on the sidewalk with Bobby in tow. The silence between us as we headed the two blocks towards Brian's house was actually welcome as they listened to just the birds chirping and the occasional car passing by. Having a friend is really sort of a new experience for me. But Bobby seemed a little clingy to me. Of course, I was a loner. So maybe this is how having a friend for the first time, in like forever, felt like?
 
 
Eventually, Brian steered the bike up towards his home and to the garage. Bobby helped him lift up the garage door and he took and positioned the bike next to the wall and pushed the kickstand down and balanced it. Brian just wondered why Bobby was treating him so nicely? He stood there holding the bag, his mouth almost hanging open in bewilderment.

Bobby didn't say a word. He just grinned and walked over beside Brian and pulled the garage door back down for him as well.

Brian just shook his head in astonishment.
 
 
“Hey Mom! I'm home,” Brian loudly announced as he and Bobby entered the house and Bobby shut the front door behind him.

“Oh, hi dear,” she started as she appeared in view coming in from the living room and then noticed Bobby standing beside me.

“Well, well, I see you have a friend with you?” she eyed Brian with surprise and that all knowing, all seeing, Mom-radar was pinging Brian and Bobby both.

Bobby stepped forth and held his hand out. “I'm Bobby Jones. We just moved into the blue corner house at the end of the street today. My parents want to know if your family would like to dine with us tonight out back? We ordered 3 medium pizzas of a variety and some chicken wings.”

“Well thank you, Bobby! That is very kind of your parents. I am Lisa Smith. Are you going to attend Frederick Charles Krueger Jr. High with Brian?”

“Yes Ma'm, I am.”

“That's great! My Brian does so well there. I'm a single parent now. Brian's father passed away in a car accident 7 years ago. But we are doing well, despite that.”

Bobby kind of had a sad look on his face as he looked over at Brian. Brian just lowered his eyes some, obviously affected by loss of his father.

“Oh Brian,” his mother added, “Your computer part came in today. Go ahead and take it to your room upstairs and I'll freshen up and drive us over.” Then turning towards Bobby, “Feel free to watch television while we get ready.”

Brian's eyes lit up as a tingle of fear chilled his spine. He saw the package on his mother's desk where she stored their mail at. It did look like a motherboard box wrapped in plain brown wrapping paper. It didn't to have appeared to be opened.

Whew!

Brian, fearful that Bobby would actually attempt to follow him up the stairs and into his room, pointed over to the couch, “I'll be right back down.”

Brian then dashed over to the desk, grabbed the box, and dashed up to his room and tossed everything onto the bed. Locking the door, Brian went over to the package and looked at the label. It did indeed, as advertised, say At-Home Ltd. So it did not appear to give away what was contained within.

Ripping the wrapping paper off, Brian saw an MSI Motherboard box. Pulling the flap open, Brian gazed upon the treasure within. Four stacks of three bound medicine boxes of tablets that had been buffered with bubble wrap. The hormones!

Briefly glancing at the instructions on the back of one of the boxes, Brian ripped open one end of a pillbox and popped out the blister pack. He then pushed one tablet out and went over to his computer desk and unscrewed the cap of a used bottle of water that he had left there.

Brian then downed the tablet with a swig.

Girlhood, here I come!
 
 

 
To Be Continued...
 
 
End of Part 1. Hide and Seek