Onboard SS ERIN midnight 08 Nov 17:
Today had been a long day for Eliza and her sister Chrissie. Packing, the long trip to the harbor, getting everything unpacked and stored in the much too small cabin the shared was tiring. Lunch was tolerable except for the most charming Tom Dodge who entertained everyone with his many strange sea tales that his son demanded. Each story more fantastic than the prior story. As a storyteller he was; well, he just was.
After lunch, the two sisters toured the ship, met most of the other passengers and a few of the crew who were scurrying about hither and yon seemingly with out purpose, but with fierce determination. Eventually, they found a pair of chairs on the deck and relaxed and watched the land and other passing ships until they lost sight of land and other ships. With only endless and empty ocean to watch, both sisters settled down to read until they dozed off...
It was soon dark, and they retired to their cabin to dress for dinner (it was customary in those days to dress for dinner). Dinner was excellent and the sisters were pleased to sit at the captain's table (although they would have liked to have Tom and his son at their table). After dinner, there was conversation and drinks with the other passengers followed by dancing. The sisters found they were quite popular and danced many times with all of the eligible gentlemen.
Finally they retired to their cabin, but Eliza and Chrissie couldn't sleep because of the motion of the ship and headaches (caused by the alcohol they consumed - something they rarely enjoyed at home with their strict parents), so they decided to take a late night walk on the deck...
As they walked along the port side of the ship, Eliza noticed a sailing ship approaching their ship. They were not suprised to see a sailing ship, sailing ships were still being used in 1917. However, as the ship approached closer, they could clearly see cannon on the ship! Eliza grabbed Chrissie's arm tightly when the full moon came out making the flag on the sailing ship clearly visible - THE SKULL AND BONES! A PIRATE FLAG!
The two sisters ran towards the ship's lounge, where lights still could be seen. When the entered the lounge, the meet Tom Dodge and the Second Mate. The two men found the strange sighting the frightened girls described to be unbelievable (attributing their bizarre claims to the wild imagination of two young and very drunk girls). Being gentlemen, they decided to humor the two girls. Each man took a girl by the arm and led them out on the deck to verify their sighting...
The moon was still out, and the frightened girls saw that the pirate ship was now sailing alongside the ERIN. The men looked where the girls were pointing but could see nothing but open sea??? They watched for a while, but the girls were unable to convince the men that there was a pirate ship pointing it's cannon at the unsuspecting ERIN!
The girls began to shiver from the cold (and their fear?). The men finally convinced the girls to retire to their cabin for the night and promised to have the crew keep a sharp lookout for pirates...
The girls locked their cabin door, undressed and got into their bunks. They quickly fell asleep from exhaustion and slept quietly through the night...
Comments
Soon the Flying Dutchman will
Soon the Flying Dutchman will come by, just for the girls.
Karen
Re: Soon the Flying Dutchman will
You're on the right track, but look out for the red herrings.
ARGH!!! - You Tube link
The 2012 You Tube Link at the top of this chapter isn't working. It worked yesterday (19 SEP 16)???
Here is an alternate link that is still working (20SEP16):
http://youtu.be/Y8B2hrxXJl
If the link doesn't work, try from Google (Google "You best start believing in ghost stories miss Turner" and select the 47 second video). This is a shorter video, but still creates the sense of horror intended. It is from the first Pirates of the Carribean Movie (Curse of the Black Pearl)
Unlike the other September Contest stories, this serial is meant to be a true horror/murder mystery.
I'm told this video doesn't
I'm told this video doesn't exist
Posting Schedule
I had planned on posting two (2) chapters a day until this serial is complete, however, someone messaged me and told me that you are supposed to post only one chapter per day. (Don't be overly impressed, the individual chapters are very short).
This serial is one of the entries for the September writers challenge. Unlike the other submissions, this serial is meant to be a real horror story/ murder mystery. As the story progresses, (like many mystery stories) all is not as it seems. This story is best read on a dark and stormy night after you have had too much to drink and the lights begin to flicker...
If you read my story,you'll
If you read my story,you'll see I like short chapters
Hugs,
Karen
Re: if you read my story...
I've been reading about Gene from chapter one. My only quibble is the chapter where your heroines talked the gangster's daughter into calling the cops and offered to stay and provide support. I thought (in view of their absconding with the drug money) that the last thing they would want to do was talk to cops. Also, in most Big Closet stories, TG characters are wary about cops.
I personal preference is for serial chapters posted on a REGULAR schedule. When there is a month or more gap between chapters, I find myself having to reread the earlier chapters. I would rather have authors sacrifice length for regularity.
Last to first
Last to first
I agree, once or twice a week steadily is the best way for the readers.
Well, I had them afraid of the Boston cops, Ginny ( the flirt) is friendly with a Swampscott cop, which worked out when Vinny broke into the condo.
I felt the girls were secondary in the State Police's mind, and Ginny's ID had stood up to scrutiny before.They were just friends giving comfort to Tina.
Karen