Kinda an interesting moment yesterday.
I had been struggling all day, so I finally decided I needed to go out, and put on a pretty skirt and went to the new Star Trek film.
The film was great, the best since the reboot, but that wasn't the interesting moment.
No, that came just as the film was about to start. I had chosen a seat near the top and at the end of the row, and I looked up and realized there was a family of four looking for seats. I looked at the row I was sitting in, and realized if I gave up my seat, they could sit together, so I got up, and offered them the spot.
They thanked me, we watched the movie, and that was it, until after the movie was over and one of the family, an older man who was probably grandpa, turned to me and shook my hand for being so kind.
No problem, except he brought his grandson forward and told the kid to "thank the gentleman."
I had no clue how to respond, so I blushed, said "you're welcome", and fled the theater as quickly as I could.
Ah, well. just a bump on the road ...
Comments
Acceptance
OK, I know that for you it would have been nice, and you are accustom to having people see you as a woman. However even the those of us who pass easily as genetic women sometimes get read. What's important in your account is his reaction to you after you were read. What we all fear is a negative reaction; anything from a disgusted look, to verbal lashing out, to violence. But you didn't get any of those. You got acceptance. He saw you as a trans woman, that is he recognized your genetic make up and even though he was at clumsy in the way he addressed you, he still went out of his way to do the polite thing and even had his grandson come with him to thank you. That's called acceptance. He accepted that you were born genetically male, were dress in women's clothes and went out of his way to teach his grandson that same acceptance.
Even though you felt a bit uncomfortable I'd say that was a positive for the trans community.
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann
I would say - it does not mean a thing.
On several occasions I was refered to as local equivalent of "miss". And at least twice I was wearing jeans, fleece jacket, vibram/goretex man's walking shoes, and two day stubble on my face... And it's not like I am an androginous svelte person. No. I weigh somwhere about 240 pounds with at least 100 of them in my beer belly (that appeared on me about 5 years before I started to drink beer more or less regularly) ... (when I'm buying a corset from local TG friendly supplier it is always a pain to remember do I need XXXXXL or XXXXXXXL size... ;-) ...)
Also adjust for the old age and heavy gendering load: in families of many kids it is always a struggle not to call your niece Mary by your seond cousin son's name Tim :-) As for random strangers... I've more than once or twice seen 8 month pregnant young beautifull girls called "sir" and burly paratroopers (one of them was in uniform with beret and machine gun) called "miss" by overwhelmed (grand)parents...
Masculine women get this all the time.
people consider it a compliment to call any unknown 'sir'. Its considered less insulting to call a woman sir than to call a man 'maam'.
I've been called sir a lot especially on the phone. I just shrug and move on. If they keep calling me sir... I correct them.
In person I act all insulted. "I realise I'm feeling sick... but SIR?! Really!" They almost always correct themselves :-)
Dayna.