It's usually hard to pick up the pieces, we tend to think that some things would take a miracle to be repaired.
Events unfold including but not limited to: |
“Hey Sare..”
My voice was just a little bit shaky but I think I covered it well.
Sarah’s head shot up the moment I opened the door and she’s staring at me with wide, wet eyes.
I barely managed to get my butt in the car seat before she was reaching across to pull me into a tight hug.
She mumbled something into my neck but I couldn’t understand it at first.
After a moment her head shifted and she sighed heavily.
“I’m so sorry, this is all my fault..”
My hands automatically came up to pat her back but I was a bit lost for words.
It feels like I’ve come into this conversation half way through, AND from the wrong end of it.
“You didn’t do anything Sare? I was gonna come begging forgiveness from you. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that..”
She squeezed me a little tighter and let off a hollow laugh into my shoulder.
“We need to talk. How does lunch at the flat sound?”
I still felt a little thrown off by her apology but lunch doesn’t sound bad right now.
I can pick up a few of my things from the flat while we’re the-
Oh.. yeah..
“I can’t. Mum’s gonna be waiting for me to get back from ‘Gladstones’..”
Sarah’s face mirrored my cringe at the idea of going back to mum right now.
It’s pretty obvious there’s something big going on that I’m missing details on, we really need to get out in the open at the moment..
“Two seconds, I’ll call her.”
She leaned away from me and scooped up her mobile from the hand-free kit on her dashboard.
My hands came down to nervously fiddle with the hem of my, now repaired, tartan skirt.
For some reason the act of fiddling with the cloth in my fingers calmed me down a little.
I’ll have to check with Trudy to make sure there’s no after-effects from the enchantments she has in the AMS office, I’ve never been one to fiddle with my hands before.
Especially with a skirt..
Admittedly I’ve not worn knee-length skirts very often in the past, so it could just be me.
Most of the skirts I ended up wearing while doing ‘favours’ for Sarah or while on a mission were either longer formal things, longer summer things or much shorter ‘distraction’ things.
I heard the call pick up and mum’s muffled voice from Sarah’s phone but couldn’t make out what she was saying.
My hands drifted down a little and tugged my knee-high socks up a bit better, the left one was sliding down compared to the right one.
“Hey mum.. Yeah, I’m good.. Tor’s fine too..?”
Sarah shot me a confused look.
I shrugged and mouthed ‘later’ to her.
She nodded back and refocused on the call.
“I’ve got Hannah with me.. Sorry, I’ve got Ari with me.”
She winced a little.
I don’t blame her, I hate that name too.
“We’re going to drop around to my flat for a bit, I think I have some old clothes she can have and..”
Her voice dipped down as if she was trying to whisper something out of my hearing range.
“..I think she’s having some boy-trouble. I should be a good sister and help her out ya kno-“
Sarah’s eyes went impossibly wide and she slowly turned to face me with worry.
“uh..no.. she’s not mentioned any name’s yet. I’ll see what she thinks about this ‘Max’ if I get the chance..”
I winced but nodded in answer to her unasked question.
Her shoulders sank and she shook her head a little in disbelief.
“That’s great, I’ll drop her home in time for dinner. Is it okay if I stay too? It’s been ages since I last had one of your dinners..”
Despite her obvious shock at Max’s uninvited appearance into the conversation, and my life in general, Sarah’s lips curved up a little in a smile.
I think she really HAS missed a lot of the little stuff with mum, like having dinner at home every once in a while.
“Great, I’ll talk to you later then mum.. love you too.”
With a sigh she hung up and rested her head on the steering wheel for a moment.
Finally she sucked in deep breath and shot back up to give me a pretty unconvincing grin.
“So.. been a girl a few days and already got yourself a suitor huh?”
I cringed a little.
Her smile slipped back into a more serious look.
“Tell me everything, hopefully by the end of it you can tell me something that will stop me from beating that little shit to death the moment I see him..”
She flinched a little and shuddered.
“I’m only hoping for that much because I’m pretty sure he can just magic me out of existence.. or whatever you mages do to people who annoy you..”
My mouth twitched in a slight smile but it didn’t last.
That really isn’t the kind of topic I can laugh about at the moment, even if I have calmed down a bit since this morning.
“Well, for a start he can’t directly hurt me anymore. I got a brand on him while I was leaving the temple with Tor, he’s more of an annoyance at this point than anything else..”
Sarah sighed and pulled me into a relieved hug.
Her hands came up to gently stroke the ends of my, now far too long, hair comfortingly.
“Start from the top Han. The last I saw you seemed okay, a bit flustered from shopping obviously but nowhere near how you were this morning.. even Mum was acting surprisingly nice about everything at the time too.”
She obviously knew what she was getting into the moment I open my mouth, I don’t need much of a push to start ranting when it comes to Max..
She leaned away from me enough that she could turn the key to start the car and she pulled us out onto the street slowly but her eyes kept flicking over to me with worry.
With a deep breath I started.
I’ve needed to get a lot of this off my chest to someone, I told Fena a lot earlier but there are some things I’d only ever tell Sarah..
She’s pretty much the only person I would trust with everything that goes on in my head, let alone being someone who would have even the slightest chance of understanding it all.
“Well it started with me taking a shower..”
======
We pulled up in Sarah’s parking spot outside the flat a bit too sharply.
Her’s knuckles were white on the steering wheel and her face was tight with anger.
There were a few times, particularly when I told her about John slipping himself into the Martials family and what I’d found out about the brand storyteller put on me, where I thought she was going to plough us off the road with her driving.
She’s not the safest of drivers as it is, let alone when she’s this angry.
“So.. just so I’m clear..”
Her head slowly turned to watch me.
For some reason it feels like she should have a twitch forming in her eye with the forced pleasant look she’s got stretched on her face.
“The bastard that turned you into a teenage girl is now living next-door and stalking you. Mum’s convinced I’m practically married to Tor, she’s also convinced that you fancy Max, John, whatever his name is.. she’s convinced you fancy him.. on top of that your magic is so messed up that a simple spell gave you super-model worthy hair, also mum convinced you to wear that stupid outfit to the Hub today.”
I opened my mouth to argue.
There was no convincing involved, she just made me wear it!
..okay.. maybe I could have stood up to her a bit more but it’s been a stressful few days!
I was barely awake and she was REALLY determined that I should wear it..
“On top of all THAT, you found out that this ‘storyteller’ character gave you a marriage brand that’s made your magic even MORE unstable, not to mention him having placed it being completely illegal.. THEN, just to put the icing on the cake, you have two, honest to god, supposedly mythical warrior women on the warpath hunting him down for you and Fena almost killed you.”
My finger came up to argue the point but I slowly dropped it and closed my mouth after a moment’s consideration.
There’s not a single point there I can actually argue with..
Hearing someone else describe it really puts things in perspective honestly.
..Man, my life SUCKS..
Sarah’s death-grip on the steering wheel eased and she started getting things together to get out of the car.
She paused for a second to sigh deeply to herself.
“I really messed up this time Han..”
My eyebrow perked up in curiosity.
She shook her head and gestured towards the flat, basically saying ‘not here’.
I nodded, following her out of the car to go inside, instead of questioning her further.
This feels like the kind of conversation that would be better over a cup of coffee while sitting on our sofa..
======
“Okay..”
Sarah huffed to herself and took a sip of her coffee.
“Okay.. I messed up Han. When they debriefed me on your condition in the medi-bay I was given strict guidelines on what I should and shouldn’t do with you. I agreed obviously, it’s the only way they would let you out of there anytime soon, and we both know how bad you are with hospitals..”
A little smirk formed on my lips.
I’ve never been good at being a patient.
Even when I was little and I got a cold, I’d end up trying to go play in the woods outside while running a high fever instead of resting.
Mum ended up cuffing me to her with a long chain to stop me leaving the house when she was home looking after us on those days, it got THAT bad.
It’s one of the few times where Sarah would be the quiet one and I was the annoying little hyperactive bouncy ball of energy.
I just tend to feel better moving around while I’m ill usually, being all cooped up makes me feel worse from the start.
It’s kind of odd I slept so much the other day after using so much blood magic actually.
Usually I can’t sleep when I feel that ill.
Last time it happened I ended up sitting up for three days straight coming up with new enchantment formula’s until I felt better.
Sarah smiled at me with a bit of a pained look to her face.
“With everything that happened with mum I completely spaced on the guidelines.. I kind of got caught up having mum back, ya know?”
I nodded, much to her relief.
I know what it’s like to get caught up with mum being nice again AND I saw how well they were getting on the other day too..
I doubt I could have done much better in remembering other things in the same situation.
Her smile slipped and she winced after a moment to gather herself.
“Han.. your messed up.. your magic is just WRONG at the moment and your brain..”
Her hands fiddled with her coffee a little nervously.
“The head nurse at the medi-bay didn’t want to let me take you home. She said you were just on the edge of having a full psychotic episode, she said your magic was off the charts and still climbing.”
Her hands fiddled again.
“When you woke up I figured you were acting normally, ya know? I figured she was just exaggerating or something.. you seemed fine to me..”
Her head dipped down and her shoulders shook a little.
“I’m sorry Han..”
Her head came up to stare at me with a broken look in her eyes.
“She told me I should stay with you. That you needed someone watching you constantly.. someone who could take you into the Hub at the first sign of trouble.”
Her chin wobbled dangerously.
“I.. If I’d known you were going to your room to meditate, to try and sort out what was wrong with your head, I would have stopped you and rushed us back to the Hub.. but I wasn’t thinking.”
The hand holding her coffee was trembling too now.
“Her words didn’t even come back to me until I was back here, later on that night.. and I shrugged it off again, like an idiot, thinking that you hadn’t called or shown any problems yet, ya know?”
Her head dipped down to stare at her hands again.
“I forget sometimes, despite how it seems, that you’re not immortal.. you’re not some vengeful guardian angel that always knows what to do and is always there to save me.. Your my sister..”
Her chin gave up all pretence of stability and she shuddered hard against the sofa, almost spilling her coffee in the process.
“You needed help Han.. medical help.. I should have been there for you and I wasn’t.. I convinced myself you were fine an-”
Her voice trailed off into a higher pitch which finally settled into a pained whine as she burst into tears and dived across the sofa to hug me, sending both of our coffees flying across the floor.
“I’m sorry.. I knew from the moment you came stomping out of the house that something was wrong. I tried to cheer you up, I thought.. I HOPED that it was just you being grumpy about the uniform and whatever had happened to your hair but..”
Her cheek nuzzled against mine, the same way she used to do when we were kids.
“I’m sorry..”
My hands came up around her and gave her a tight squeeze in return.
“You don’t need to get this upset over it Sare.. I’m fine now..”
She grunted and shoved her wet face deeper into my hair.
Who knew, this stupid fluffy mass on my head would apparently be useful for something after all?
It seems she finds the annoying loose curls on my head to be a comfortable hiding place for her tears at least..
“I should have-”
I leaned away from her a little and put a finger to her lips making a ‘shh’ sound.
“Sare, I won’t pretend I’m not worried about what you’ve told me. I’ve noticed similar things myself already.. I think we need to set up a meeting with one of the magi-medics at the Hub to get a full run down soon.. but I don’t blame you.”
She opened her mouth to argue but I pushed my finger against her lips a bit harder to stem her words.
“You just said you forget that I’m only human sometimes, that I make mistakes and need help too.. well don’t forget YOUR human as well.. we all make mistakes Sare. As it is, I think I’ve got a pretty good handle on the problems now.”
Her mouth opened again and when my finger didn’t push down to stop her she actually spoke.
“You seem a lot more stable then you were this morning.. what changed?”
I smirked at her and pulled my hand away from her lips to push back my annoying hair arrogantly.
“I’m just amazingly gifted and fixed myself..”
It started small but I could hear it easily.
Sarah made a little ‘snerk’ noise in the back of her throat.
Without any further warning she started laughing.
It was probably more from relief at me being able to mess about after such a serious conversation but her laugh was infectious enough to set me off too.
Her laugh can always set me off, I’m tempted to say it’s a twin thing but I think it’s more of an ‘us’ thing honestly.
“Oh great and powerful Witch of Oz..”
She didn’t finish the line but she didn’t need to, we both laughed a little more anyway.
After watching the Wizard of Oz as kids we had a little in-joke that, whenever one of us did something stupid, we were the scarecrow and had to ask the ‘wise one’ for a brain to make up for it.
It’s been a long times since either of us has brought that up..
I can’t help but feel kind of nice knowing that we can still do silly stuff like that.
For far too long my interactions with Sarah have been a bit too tense and grown up, normally because I only tended to see her when she was in danger or I was in a rush to get to a new mission..
Come to think of it, this last week is probably the most time we’ve spent together in one go for a fair few years..
Our laugher eased naturally but we were both left with warm smiles our faces.
“Seriously though, I managed to find a balance for what was going on in my head a few days ago and with the AMS peoples help today I worked out what’s been going on with my magic lately too, it’s not good but it’s manageable at least.”
I’m kind of glad Rosemary and Trudy’s office has that ‘calming’ rune system all over it.
Without that, I might not have been calm enough to notice what my magic was doing after I vented it all..
I’m sure I would have worked it out at some point, probably when I went to see Fena an..
“Oh.. and Edith did something weird, she kind of fixed my ice magic problem at the same time as making it easier for me to use up my excess magic quickly.”
I could see the curiosity in Sarah’s eyes right away.
She’s always been a bit in awe of Edith’s whole ‘secretive old wise woman of few words’ act.
The one that works so well on a lot of people.. until you actually get to know her for the head hitting, ‘Bad Juju’ yelling, insane little yoda that she is at least..
The idea that I got help from Edith instead of Fena at the shop probably helps too, those two STILL don’t like each-other for some reason.
“Can I see?”
My smile got a bit wider.
I don’t fully understand what Edith did yet but how can I resist showing off for Sarah?
Especially when emptying my body of all this built up magic feels SO good at the moment..
“Hold on to your seat. It’s gonna get bright for a second.”
She actually took me at my word for some reason, her hands reached down and took a tight grip onto the sofa, just in case.
It took a bit of effort for me to bring up what I needed.
Like before, it’s not exactly hard to get my magic to respond at the moment, getting the excess magic in my lines to follow after it isn’t hard either.
For some reason the change from ice magic to whatever it is Edith’s done to convert it into this pseudo-healing magic thing I have now isn’t an instinctive change, if I’m doing it manually like this at least.
I guess.. that’s the difference between my attempts at mind magic and her mastery of it?
While it was obvious in the shop earlier that, while under stress where my magic will spike, I’ll instinctively let off a blast of this stuff.. I think she somehow made the link so that it takes actual concentration for me to do it on purpose.
On the plus side, that means I get to use ice magic still if I want to!
On the downside it means I have to put a bit of mental effort in to do this sort of thing consciously.
Overall, it’s probably a fair trade off.
I’m pretty happy with it at least.
Imagine if I had absolutely no natural offensive spells left?
Magic is magic but in a fight most mages fall back on their natural element, it can pretty much be cast with a thought and comes out with a lot more force than a spell using the same amount of magic would offer.
I really owe Edith for helping me like this, even if she was in a bad mood over it all for some reason.
My magic cycled around my body while I built myself up to pushing it out.
It’s a really weird feeling to describe, I can feel that there’s a kind of ‘mental switch’ I can throw to release all that built up power at my fingertips in one go but finding the switch is awkward at the moment..
If I had to give an analogy I’d say it’s like trying to find a light switch on a wall in a dark room.
I know it’s there, I just can’t quite get-
THERE it is!
With a wave of, what felt like, cold wind ALL of the swirling magic inside me surged outwards in every direction.
It passed through my skin without any effort at all, going out in a roughly dome like shape through Sarah and flooding over the whole flat.
oh.. ohhh that feels good..
..Ohh..
======
“Han?.. Han are you..”
Sarah’s shaking woke me up from my post-orgasmic daze.
I’m feeling too good right now to call it anything else.
If anything THAT one felt even better than the last few times I’ve pushed all my magic out instinctively.
My head flopped sideways to rest on my shoulder and I offered Sarah a goofy smile instead of speaking.
“What the hell did you DO Han?.. that.. you fixed my sofa!.. and the floorboards.. and the lampshade in the corner.. an-”
My floppy arm came up and gently tried to stop her talking but fell short for some reason.
I let my arm fall completely and leaned hard into her body instead with a happy snigger.
“..are you.. drunk?”
That made me snigger even harder and rub my face into her stomach a bit more.
This feeling is so good.
I’m so empty, and I fixed things..
I didn’t break or hurt anyone for once.. and it felt SO good..
“Han..”
Sarah shifted how she was sitting on the sofa and somehow managed to move me over so I was practically sitting in her lap.
I almost fell face-first off the couch in the process but she caught me at the last second with an annoyed huff.
“.. what am I gonna do with you, huh?”
I sniggered again and tried to lean back into her instead of answering.
She doesn’t sound angry, more amused and exasperated than anything.
My head came to rest on her chest, my too long hair fanned out around me perfectly, as always.
I can’t even bring myself to be annoyed at how the ‘perfect hair’ spell is still lingering in my system at the moment.
A hand came up to play with a piece of it.
It took me a moment to realise that it was really MY hand.. I could feel the hair passing through my fingers.
Sarah’s hand came up and carefully cupped mine to bring it back down to my lap.
“Com’ on Han, why don’t you take a little nap yeah? You’ll feel better afterwards I promise.”
..Feel better..
Is that even possible?
A nap though.. naps are good..
Just thinking about taking a nap made me yawn wide.
Sarah let out an awkward breath that tickled my ears by moving my hair.. my long soft hair..
“That’s it Han, let’s have a nice nap and you’ll feel better when you wake up okay?”
I rolled my head to snuggle into her chest a bit more in response.
“mmm-Nr..”
That’s about as much communication as I feel up to at the moment.
My mouth doesn’t want to cooperate for some reason.
“Com’ on Han.. nap time..”
With one last unsuccessful shuffle to bring my legs up onto the sofa I let out a contented sigh and settled in to sleep.
Sarah’s hand feels so nice stroking my hair like that..
======
It’s warm.
It’s really comfortable and warm.
I don’t want to move but I really need to pee and my head feels weird.
My eyes opened and promptly shut again with a groan.
It’s daylight out.
It doesn’t feel like it should be daylight out..
“Awake, are you?”
Sarah sounded really amused for some reason.
“Mmm-nr..”
I rubbed my face into the soft sofa.
Hopefully she got the meaning of my words from that..
Her hands gripped my shoulder and rolled me over so I was face up suddenly.
I groaned and cracked one eye open to give her a beady glare.
“Close enough..”
She had a smug smile on her face for some reason too.
“I should thank you, ya know?”
I grunted and tried to roll back over but she wouldn’t let me.
“Whatever you did fixed my water-heater, I just managed the longest shower I’ve ever had in this place without running low on hot water even once.”
She seemed happy about that, it took me far too long to work out why.
I’m not quite running on all cylinders yet.. my mouth had automatically moved into a smile for her anyway.
If someone smiles at you, you smile back.
That’s just logical.
“Do you think you can walk Han? I need to get you back to mum before dinner..”
With a lot of effort I managed to push myself upright and slowly moved into a wobbly standing position.
Sarah squinted at me thoughtfully.
“Good enough, if mum asks I’ll tell her you felt a bit ill in the car.”
I nodded my head as best I could.
My head is slowly starting to clear.. painfully slowly.
“I felt ill the other.. day.. she-”
I almost lost my balance and had to lean backwards quickly with a yelp.
Sarah surged forward and caught me with a steadying arm.
“..She’ll buy it.”
Sarah smiled at me again and my lips pulled into a happy smile too.
Things are getting clearer but I feel far too happy to be normal right now..
“Com’ on then Han. I’ll put you in the car and you can sleep a bit more on the way there.”
She shifted her arm a little to give me more support and slowly started moving us out of the flat.
“Is there anything else you need while we’re here?”
I rolled my shoulders and laughed a little at the weird heavy, tight feeling on my head.
“My Pyjamas.. my bag.. books and my laptop?”
She nodded her head and focused on getting us carefully down the stairwell.
I spent the descent clinging to the banister for support, the last thing I need to do is fall down the stairs right now..
======
The slam of Sarah’s car boot woke me up with a jolt.
My magic surged forth protectively before I could stop it and with a muted flash, the car shook and Sarah fell on her ass with a surprised yelp.
“Son of a-”
She made her way back to her feet while rubbing her eyes and gave me an annoyed look in the rear view mirror.
I shrugged with an apologetic frown, it’s not like I can help it, she startled me..
For a second she seemed to forgive me but then her eyes drifted and she let off a sharp gasp.
“What the hell did you do to my CAR?!”
My shoulders sunk back into the seat a bit tighter.
I didn’t need to look around to guess what I’d done.
The same thing I’ve done to everything since Edith added this new diversion to my instinctive ice magic.. I fixed it.
Maybe if I stay huddled in this seat and focus on the waves of pleasure rolling around my body from releasing yet ANOTHER wave of oppressive magic build-up from my lines, things will just work out without my input.
The feeling is still so good.
Not quite as good as the last one, that left me in some kind of pleasure induced giggly waking-coma state, but still really nice in general..
“Holy crap Han..”
I chanced a glance up at her face and felt a bit relieved that she didn’t seem angry anymore.
With a squeal she dived into the car to pull me into an excited hug.
“Holy CRAP Han, you fixed my CAR!”
I tried to shift around weakly so I could breathe easier but she let me go quickly enough that it didn’t really matter.
She sunk into the driver seat and rubbed her hands on the steering wheel in awe.
With a yank she slammed her door shut and shoved the keys in the ignition.
The car ticked over instantly and purred like the day it was made, instead of the rough asthmatic wheeze I’m used to hearing from her car at this point.
The poor thing is over ten years old after all.
She bought it ‘pre-loved’ from a rather active past-owner too, so it was never in the best of conditions to start with..
She still loves it though.
I suggested she get a new one at one point a while ago but she refused.
She said some silly stuff about it being like family and if we had a Grandma, that we knew, we wouldn’t throw her out the door the moment she started making old people noises.
At the time I honestly didn’t care enough to argue with her logic.
“oh hoo, your all shiny Betty!”
..oh no.. she’s talking to it again..
THIS is why I didn’t care enough to argue with her logic.
She talks to the bloody car if it’s ‘misbehaving’.. or in this case when it’s suddenly got a magically assisted makeover.
I rolled my eyes and tried to not make eye contact with her.
She’ll only drag me into her madness and make me talk to it too..
I’m kind of impressed by what my new diverted magic has done though.
I don’t have the first clue about how to repair a car but it definitely sounds like my magic managed it somehow.
The seats feel less ‘used’ now too, the paint on the hood is shining brightly in the setting sunlight with not even a scratch visible to my eyes.
Even the mirrors are clean and clear.
Hell, the car actually SMELLS new now!
Just WHAT the hell did Edith set my magic to divert to??
Judging by how much power I use every time my magic sparks off now, it can’t just be a basic elemental change.
I thought doing stuff like changing fire to lava or water to ice would be a big gap in power but this.. this effect I keep having..
It’s off the charts!
If I wasn’t ME, and a locus point..
I’d literally be able to have a single angry outburst per day before I was magically drained into uselessness, and that’s talking best case scenario!
A normal mage with this diversion on them could possibly, no make that PROBABLY, fall into a dangerous level of magic withdrawal where their body starts shutting down from having a near empty core.
..Trust me that is NOT a nice way to die quickly..
======
“We’re going to go to the car place on south-sixth street and get you some nice new fluffy dice to celebrate.. yes we are, yes we are..”
..Now she’s baby talking to the car, while rubbing the dashboard..
Forget ‘magic making people crazy’, I think it’s just something that runs in our family.
With one memory modification mum is convinced she came up with the name ‘Arista’ from an old family myth and that I should dress like a school girl in public..
I’ve got the world’s most complicated form of multiple personality disorder.. and Sarah baby talks to her car..
Our whole family is one big psychologists dream pay-check waiting to happen!
I coughed into my fist a little to get Sarah’s attention.
She stopped rubbing the dashboard and gave me an awkward, apologetic look as a blush formed slightly on her cheeks.
“Sorry..”
It was a struggle not to laugh but I held it down to a simple understanding smile with slightly tweaked eyebrow.
“I’ll just..”
Her blush didn’t dim but she left the sentence unfinished as she reached for her keys.
I let it drop and put my head back against the headrest of the seat.
I feel a lot better now, my head still feels oddly heavy and tight but hopefully that will go away over time, at least my hairs not in the way, the last few times I’ve got in the car I’ve tangled it all over my face getting in or just got it caught in the door somehow.
..stupid long hair..
Sarah gave me one more awkward look but quickly turned back to the car, revved the engine and grinned when it roared in healthy agreement to her plans.
“Buckle up Han, we’re taking the new improved Betty for a spin.”
I scrabbled frantically for my seatbelt.
She’s bad enough normally, I do NOT need to die in a car crash because of an unworn seatbelt thank-you-very-much!
With one more roaring rev of the engine Sarah shot us out of the parking lot behind the flats and whipped into the evening rush-hour.
My hand came up to my mouth and I had to hold back the sudden urge to vomit.
..How does she still have her licence?!..
======
We gently rolled to a stop in mum’s driveway and Sarah let out a happy sigh of satisfaction.
I tried to pry my white knuckles off of the handle above my door and sighed to myself in relief.
All signs of my previous, pleasure induced, sleepy-ness are gone at this point.
The only thing that stopped me from letting off yet ANOTHER set of magical ‘fix everything’ power blasts every time she took a tight corner at speed was the very real possibility that they might somehow fix her car even MORE and make us go FASTER!
I’ve spent the last fifteen minutes with a tight clamp on my magic, to not let even a hint of it escape, just in case.
My sister is a menace to society when driving, especially when she’s enjoying it!
Sarah turned off the engine and almost seemed to fly across the divide between us to hug me tightly.
“You’re the best! I love you, have I told you lately that I love you? Because I love you and you fixed my CAR and it’s so amazing!”
Her hug felt a bit too tight.
I had to wheeze in a breath past her squishing my new, smaller, chest cavity and now-existent boobs too much.
“That was fun right? What about when I overtook that guy in the sports car, the LOOK on his face! I-”
She seemed to notice something about the look on MY face and almost dropped me back into the passenger seat, in a rush her hand flicked open the door and she pushed me sideways so I was leaning out of the car.
“Oh no you don’t! This is my nice shiny new Betty, you’re NOT throwing up in her Han!”
I don’t know what she’s worrying about, I honestly don’t think I’m going throw up right now..
I may have come a bit close at times, like the moment she just mentioned, when she sped past the sports car driver earlier while absentmindedly dodging other cars across all three lanes.. but by now I’m pretty much stuck on simply feeling glad that it’s all over..
Just to be safe, I might have to add ‘Cars’ to my list of things I would rather warp dangerously long distances with shadow magic to avoid using, or even CONSIDERING using.
They could sit nicely underneath ‘Gryphons’, ‘Planes’ and ‘Normal warping methods’ on my list without too much hassle.. and I’d NEVER have to face Sarah’s, so called, ‘driving’ EVER again!
“I’m not going to throw up Sare.. just.. I’m glad you like what my magic accidentally did and all, but just PLEASE don’t drive like that with me in here again..”
She seemed a bit upset I wasn’t sharing her joy and thrill for the insane ride we just had, but after a moment she worked out why I wouldn’t enjoy it at least.
“Sorry Han, I forget you’re not too good with motion sickness sometimes.”
It’s nothing to do with motion sickness!
I used to get that easily as a kid but I got over it as I got older, mostly.
It’s her driving that’s the problem!
I opened my mouth to tell her EXACTLY that but was interrupted by a laugh from the house.
My head moved up the pathway and settled on mum.
She obviously found something amusing.
“Oh Sarah, really? How did you talk her into letting you do something like THAT?”
My eyebrow perked up suspiciously.
I slowly turned to face Sarah, the question all over my face.
She let off a nervous laugh.
She had her ‘I’m guilty and I know I’m caught’ face on for some reason..
I waited for Sarah to explain but she seemed reluctant to do so, her hand was trying to discreetly open the driver side door.
Meanwhile mum made her way over to us and gently touched something behind my shoulder.
The weight and tightness I’d been feeling around my head since I woke up changed slightly at her touch.
“I had enough of a struggle getting her dressed for Gladstone’s this morning. You have her for a few hours and she comes back in platted pigtails..”
Sarah cringed as my eyes went painfully wide.
In all the confusion and pleasure overloaded drowsiness I’d written off the feeling of my head as a simple headache..
“Sarah!”
Before I could say anything else she gave off a yelp and shot out of the door at a, near enough, full sprint.
I tried to get up to chase her but mum got in the way.
Without an easy option to get past her, unless I push her aside and potentially hurt her, I had to stand there outside the car while mum played with my apparently platted hair.. which Sarah must have done while I was passed out earlier!
Mum smiled at me in that horribly warm way that seems to drain my willpower so much lately and flipped one of the braids over my shoulder so I could see it better.
It’s just as long as my hair has been for the last few days, just a lot more compact.
..probably easier to manage too..
NO!
I need to stop thinking RIGHT now, I don’t want to even consider the idea that pigtails could in ANY way be a good or practical look for me!
“It’s pretty. You should keep your hair like this more often, when your home at least.”
Reluctantly I eased out of my tense, ready to run, stance and let my shoulders droop.
“Come on in Ari, dinners cooking and I’ve got news that may be of interest to you and Sarah.”
She slipped an arm around my shoulders and started leading me into the house.
Her smile stayed at ‘slightly amused’ and her free hand kept fiddling with my left braid for some reason.
Someday, in some way, Sarah will PAY for this!
======
“Can you set the table Ari?”
I moved my eyes away from the window where I’d been glaring at Sarah.
She seemed reluctant to come into the house with me watching her so closely, naturally that just made me watch her even closer.
She’d better apologise when she gets in or I don’t know what I’ll do!
I’m tempted to hit her with the ‘perfect hair’ spell that did such an AMAZING job on my own hair the other day.. but she’d probably thank me for it..
Is there such a thing as a ‘bad hair day’ spell?
It feels like there should be.. it’s just the right level of petty humiliation and annoyance to make a good low-level hex for new mages..
If there isn’t one I might have to just make one myself!
I could write a book about it, ‘One-hundred and one ways to annoy your sister with magic’, has a nice ring to it right about now..
With a huff I started gathering the cutlery.
I heard the backdoor close loudly downstairs but didn’t pause in my steps towards the table.
While I was putting mums stuff in place Sarah’s footsteps came up behind me, judging by her uneven pace she was a bit hesitant to get too close at the moment.
“Han I’m sorry. I.. you looked really sweet sleeping on the sofa like that and when you didn’t wake up no matter what I did. My mind kind of.. drifted..”
I grunted and put a fork on the table a bit harder than necessary.
“Your hair is really nice now, I’m kind of jealous.”
An evil little smirk formed on my lips but I didn’t turn around to face her.
“I can do the same spell on you if you like? You can just tell everyone you got hair extensions or something.”
She caught me off guard by hugging me from behind with an excited squeal.
I thought she stopped squealing years ago but apparently today’s one big exception.
“You can really do that?”
My initial thoughts of revenge melted away at the awe in her voice.
We’ve never really gotten to bond over magic.
We’ve not had the time, more than anything else, honestly..
“Sure, I’ll do it when mum leaves tomorrow. You’re staying here tonight right?”
She let go of me and made an agreeing noise at the back of her throat.
“I have to mention that to mum actually, I’m sure she’ll go for it. Why don’t you leave the rest of the table to me and go get changed?”
Her hand flipped one of my braids playfully.
“When you get back I’ll take them out too.”
My slight annoyance at her reminding me of the braids drained away when I turned to face her and saw the fond look on her face.
It’s been a while since she’s looked at me like that.
Even after everything improved between us again in our teens she’s always seemed more guilty or worried when looking at me then she used to.
It’s amazing the things you can miss without even realising it.
I missed mum being nice to me, and I missed Sarah looking at me without being worried about something..
..If I keep this up I’m just going to end up as a big, walking bag of regrets..
I shook my head a little to clear the intrusive bad thoughts and smiled back at her.
With a sigh I passed over the cutlery to her and made my way back to my new room to get changed.
On the one hand, no more school uniform is ALWAYS going to be a plus.
On the other.. I have no idea what I’m going to wear..
======
The wolf whistle made me jump a little in surprise.
Sarah’s grin gave me a good indicator who the source of it was.
“Looking good han. I knew you’d like those shorts given the chance, I love them for work.”
My hand went down to fiddle with the leg cuffs of the silly tan colored ‘adventurer short-shorts’ that Sarah got me so many of the other day.
I hate to admit it but they ARE kind of comfortable.
Paired with a long t-shirt I don’t feel TOO self-conscious in them either.
They’re better than the school uniform at least.
“Want me to undo the braids for you?”
Mum walked over with a serving dish in her hand and opened her mouth to protest but I beat her to it.
“..maybe later. They’ll stop my hair from falling in my food for now at least.”
Sarah gave me a knowing look for some reason but didn’t argue luckily.
I honestly don’t mind the braids.
They’re embarrassing but I was going to get mum to do something similar at some point anyway.
Maybe not ‘pigtails’ exactly but a braid is a lot more efficient in holding my hair back if I can’t get it cut at some point soon.
If Sarah’s going to get me to use the ‘perfect hair’ spell to give her longer hair too then I’m not even sure if I WANT to get it cut anymore.. at least our hair can be the same again..
It’s not quite ‘being twins’ or anything but it would be something, ya know?
Before I could sink too far into considering the possible meanings behind that idea, Sarah tugged my arm and got me to sit in the seat next to her instead.
I reached out to grab a bit of garlic bread before we served out the meal but mum slapped my hand down gently.
“We say grace first..”
My eyebrow almost shot off my face with surprise.
A glance at Sarah told me I wasn’t the only one feeling a bit wrong footed.
We never said grace before, mum’s not really that big into religion after all..
She bowed her head and cupped her hands over her meal.
With a reluctant glance at each other, me and Sarah followed suit.
“By the grace of Lady Arista we share this meal, in pack, as family. May her blessings bring us strength in our struggles and keep hunt from our door. Amen”
My head had shot up the moment she mentioned that name again.
In a kind of stunned daze I echoed her ‘Amen’ and tried to not look like she’d said something so obviously weird.
From what I could see out of the corner of my eye, I hope I did a better job of it then Sarah.
She was giving me an intensely worried look without even trying to hide it.
While pulling my hands apart I waved a quick message for her to keep calm in twin speak.
She didn’t seem quite ready to give up on how weird mum’s sudden need to say ‘grace’ was, but I can’t really blame her.
I’m not exactly sure what’s going on right now either..
We all silently started piling food on our plates.
For the first time in the last few days, mum didn’t reprimand me for putting so much on there at once.
She actually seemed slightly amused by it instead for some reason.
We spent almost five minutes of silent, awkward chewing.
Sarah kept shooting me looks which I did my best to ignore.
“oh..”
Mum put her fork down and swallowed the food in her mouth.
“I almost forgot. Don’t make any plans this weekend kids”
Sarah shot me yet ANOTHER worried look at that.
“I went to see your Gran this morning, to give her the good news about you getting into Gladstone’s Ari, and she’s invited us all over to the farm for the weekend.”
My mouth dropped open.
I heard Sarah’s fork hit her plate at about the same time.
What ‘Gran’ is she on about?
We don’t HAVE family, not any that we talk to at least.. well.. except for Uncle Joe, but even he’s only over for the holidays once in a while!
“It’s been so long since I’ve been back home, the old den hasn’t changed at all.”
She frowned slightly and cupped her head on a hand thoughtfully.
“..I’d forgotten so many details of it all..”
She seemed to drift off a little with a happy smile before pulling herself back together.
“..Anyway, your Gran can’t WAIT to see you both, she said your cousins and extended family will be there too.”
She smiled warmly at us then got that strangely faraway look in her eyes again as she stared out at the mountains through the window.
“I couldn’t have picked a better time to visit. The big family barbeque is this weekend, I’d completely forgotten, it’s been so long since I celebrated a real Metanoia festival with everyone..”
..Metanoia…festival..?
My brain threw in a handy translation for me, sort of.
The King James Bible apparently says something about ‘Metanoia’ being ancient greek for ‘to repent’. I don’t know any more than that surprisingly…
I’m pretty solid on middle to modern greek from my past-incarnations but I don’t remember any incarnations that spoke real ancient greek sadly..
Mum turned her head back around and shot a strange look between us.
“Come to think of it, I don’t think either of you have ever been to Metanoia, have you?”
I numbly shook my head and I think Sarah did the same.
Mum paused for a second, then shook her own head back at us.
“We took Sarah to Metanoia when she was one or two I think.. god, has it really been THAT long since I last went?..”
Sarah’s foot came down hard on mine under the table.
I shot her an annoyed look and cringed back a little.
She did NOT look happy, her eyes screamed worry and confusion.
I’m pretty lost as well..
This is all too much to be just a ‘side effect’ of mums memory modification.
There’s too much detail, too many wide changes to her personal history..
Either someone’s done something ELSE to her recently.. or she’s actually fine?
Is it possible that we really DO have a Grandmother out there, ready to meet us this weekend?
I mean.. I know vaguely that we must have had one at some point, I think mum mentioned her before..
I must have been a bit busy at the time though, I don’t quite remember when it came up in conversation.
..And.. cousins.. and family?
W..why?.. when.. how.. WHY?!
We’ve spent twenty-four years of our lives without any contact from anyone but Uncle Joe.
Mum never talked properly about her family in all that time!
We kind of assumed they were.. ya know.. dead or something?..
“You’ll love the farm Ari, it’s got everything you could want to keep you entertained.”
Mums smile seemed a bit awkward there, I think she means something more than the obvious meaning I got from it with that look but I’m not getting whatever double meaning she may be trying to give off.
Sarah coughed to get attention and shuffled her fork awkwardly on her plate.
“I’m not sure I ca-”
My foot came down heavily on hers making her wince.
Oh no you don’t sister dearest!
You’re NOT dodging your way out of this one and leaving ME to face it alone!
Mum got something from Sarah’s failed attempt to leave me in the lurch at least.
“I’m sure they won’t mind if you bring Tor with you sweetie, he’s practically family too.”
I discreetly moved my hand over my mouth to cover the huge vindictive grin that formed on my face.
That’s what you get for trying to stick ME with all of this on my own Sarah!
Sarah’s face progressed through a few different colors and finally settled on looking slightly pale.
“I’m sure I can make it mum but I think he might have some freelance camera work this weekend.”
She gave off a nervous laugh and shot me a pleading look.
After a moments consideration, where she seemed to become more worried by the second, I nodded to myself a little.
She’s suffered enough.. for now.
“You haven’t asked about my day at Gladstone’s yet mum.”
Mum’s head turned from watching Sarah to me with an interested gleam already alight in her eyes.
Sarah let off a relieved sigh and nudged me with her knee under the table in thanks.
“How was it Ari? Did you make any new friends?”
Her smile was warm and she seemed to get even more glee at the idea of me making friends.
“well.. there was this one guy, Felix, he showed me around the halls. He was pretty cute honestly..”
From that auspicious start, I twisted most of the day’s events into something that sounded close to a ‘school’ environment situation.
Trudy is my new PhysEd teacher.. it seemed to fit..
The headmistress was a really warm older lady named Rosemary, even though she was open and friendly, she showed a moment of almost scary cold determination when dealing with a misbehaving student who was ‘making up stories’..
I even managed to rope Fena and Edith into it all.
Mum was SO pleased that I already had a friend who would be in ‘classes’ with me, even if she WAS a bit of a goth.
Sarah got progressively more amused as I went on, she couldn’t resist sliding in little snipes about Fena and even backed me up in explaining how informal but entertaining my history teacher Edith was with her when she came to pick me up.
Like all good lies, I stuck to things that were easy to remember and not entirely hard to fake if mum decides to check up on me later.
Who knows, I might be able to even get Fena to wear one of my ‘school uniforms’.
Seeing as it’s not exactly an official thing or anything I’d have to fib a little but..
I mean it’s FENA.. in a school uniform.. how adorable would that be?!
I could get blackmail pictures and everything!
..on second thought..
She could get blackmail pictures of ME too, with a LOT less effort involved..
Probably best not to try and actually enact that little idea/fantasy.
Let the sleeping, photograph taking, dragon lie.
Still, the usually gothic Fena would look amazing in one of my tartan skirts..
Maybe I can talk her into trying on the skirt part of the uniform at some point at least?
I might have to tatter it up a little first, she doesn’t tend to wear skirts unless they’re in SOME way damaged.
It’s a goth thing apparently.
“What about-”
I zoned out a little and let Sarah cover this question for once.
Mum’s enjoying herself at least.
If I didn’t know any better I’d say she’s living vicariously through me to get a feel for what ‘Gladstones’ is like.
Hopefully she loses interest soon, I’ve run out of ideas for things to twist from today into something non-magical..
======
“Night girls”
My head moved automatically to look at mum in the doorway and the piece of popcorn I’d been balancing on my nose fell off instantly.
Sarah let out a victorious ‘whoop’ of success and pointed at me with a laugh.
Mum just seemed amused by it all.
“Try not to stay up too late, you both might have a day off tomorrow but I don’t, okay?”
We nodded in sync.
In the process Sarah’s popcorn fell off her nose too.
For a moment I felt like trying to declare that as a victory of my own but it’s been too nice a night to REALLY be competitive.
After dinner we’d gotten changed into our bed-clothes.
Mum seemed pretty surprised when I turned up in an ultra-baggy pair of men’s pyjamas but when Sarah claimed them as her old ones, she seemed to calm down a little.
The fact that Sarah’s borrowed my pyjamas a few times in the past means she can technically claim them I guess, I can’t blame her, they ARE comfortable after all.
Especially now that the sleeves cover over my hands, it feels like I’m wrapped in a big warm blanket all the time!
We watched some movies, hence the popcorn.
Sarah decided to redo my hair into a less childish style.
Mum had fun huddling with her behind me discussing what they could do with it all while I played ‘hair-stylists doll’ for them both and tried to watch the movie.
I actually really like the end result surprisingly.
Sarah platted the hair along both sides of my head and somehow combined them together at the back of my head with the main mass of hair into one super long, thick braid.
It feels like the style is familiar for some reason, I think one of my incarnations from the middle ages had a similar thing with flowers woven into it.
While the flowers would be a bit too much, I like the style I have now, it’s functional.
Out of the way without looking weird..
Wow, my standards for a ‘good hairstyle’ sound pretty low when I put it like that, don’t they?
It’s true though.
I’m not going to pretend I’m not at least a LITTLE self-conscious about how I look but in general, as long as it’s not constantly in my face or getting caught on things, I’m happy enough.
That’s why I always let Sarah talk me into having a similar haircut to her, despite us having grown out of that whole ‘identical means IDENTICAL’ stage of our lives a long time ago.
Admittedly that was just above the shoulders instead of this long mass I have now but the shoulder length hair WAS different from how we used to keep our hair as kids and took just as much getting used to as the long hair will.
The fact that it didn’t interfere with my life in general was the reason I let her pick whatever she wanted style wise, I think she actually went shorter then she would have liked just for my sake at the time.
As much as we have moved on from the ‘clones of each other’ image we used to give off in our daily lives, I’ll admit that I still LIKE having similarities between us at least.
Even now, when I can’t REALLY pull off pretending to be her anymore without magical assistance.
“I’m going to head off too Han.”
Sarah caught me off guard a little but with a glance at the TV I realised that the credits had actually rolled on the last movie we were watching while we did our little ‘popcorn balancing’ face-off.
“I’ll go too..”
She came over and gave me a quick hug before we started tidying up for bed.
Every once in a while, as we passed each other with trash and cups going between the TV room and the kitchen, Sarah would give me a slight hug as if she couldn’t resist doing it.
I left each hug with a smile on my face.
We’ve not been this openly affectionate in years.
Something about being back here, together like this, is putting us both in a weird but good mood.
When everything was cleared we made our way around the house, checking the door locks, and split up at the stairs with a quite ‘good night’.
I went up to my new room in the old guest bedroom, while Sarah went down the hall to her old room.
I don’t envy her having to fit onto that little bed again.
It was barely big enough for us to sleep on when we lived here and she’s had years to get used to having a double bed to herself at the flat.
I’m glad my new bed is so wide.
Being a guest bedroom, it had to have a double bed for some reason in mums mind.
I’m not sure how I would have handled being on a little narrow bed again, along with everything else.
Single beds just feel really childish to me for some reason..
======
At some point in the night, probably about three in the morning if I’d have to guess, my bedroom door opened quietly.
I’d been dozing for a while but it’s not like I have a clock or phone to check the time with currently.
I tend to be a light sleeper anyway.. well.. when I’m not passed out or completely exhausted at least.
“Han?”
I moved my head up from the pillow and squinted into the darkness but I couldn’t really make out much more than a slightly moving object by the door.
The object, with Sarah’s voice, moved over and came to rest on the side of my bed.
“Is it okay if I sleep in here? It’s weird in my old room without you next door..”
I grunted and rolled over enough to clear the pillow away from my mouth.
Feeling a bit playful despite the late hour I considered saying no for a moment but rolled my eyes and kicked the covers clear slightly for her instead.
“Fine, just don’t grab my ass again.”
She does that in her sleep sometimes, it’s really awkward.
She apologises in the morning but I still end up being the one with handprints on my skin at that point, so naturally, it annoys me every time..
There was a lot of shuffling covers and wiggling before we got comfortable.
Sarah settled herself in the bed facing me for some reason.
I could feel her breath ghosting across my face and collarbone, she was THAT close.
“I’ve missed this..”
She slid her arms around my waist and nuzzled her cheek against mine like she used to do when we were kids.
I didn’t answer for a second but in the end I gave up to the truth of the situation.
“..me too..”
She giggled naughtily and rubbed her cheek on mine again.
“Com’ on ‘anna. Le’s go ‘leep..”
Her voice went up an octave or two as she spoke and she squeezed me tighter to herself with a contented sigh.
I rolled my eyes fondly instead of arguing.
She’s proven many times over the years that her childhood ‘speech impediments’ were almost entirely intentional.
I have no doubt they didn’t START that way, but as time went on she probably liked to sound ‘cute’ or some other silly reasoning.
It’s still one of the few things about her I’ve never managed to copy correctly.
You’d be surprised how hard it is to put, what is essentially a really thick accent, on at the drop of a hat.
“S’top f’inkin ‘anna. Go ‘leep..”
I gave her a mild growl in return, not really in annoyance but more of an acknowledgement that I would when she stopped talking.
Her hand tapped out a twin speak code on my back.
One of the first ones we ever created.
I repeated the code on her shoulder with a little smile.
We both snuggled in to sleep properly this time.
Her hand shifted slightly and she slowly tapped out the code one more time on my back.
My smile spread a bit more and I tapped it out on her arm in return.
..love you too Sarah..
Comments
"..love you too Sarah."
sweet. But now she has family? Is somebody (like maybe that storyteller, or Max) fooling around with her mom?
Sweet and sappy.
I figured they deserved a nice break for once.
They're going to need it honestly..
I'll leave off the questions for now though, spoilers etc :)
Thanks for the comment though Dorothy.
I'm glad your still enjoying the story.
I didn't say anything on the blog post the other day but I really appreciate how active you are as a reader and commenter too.
Thanks for everything you do for the community in general :)
Nessa
Another wonderful chapter!!
Another wonderful chapter!! Love the inter reaction of
the twins..err sisters...Edith is also a blast.
alissa
I love the sentimental stuff ,it is so well thought out
I am glad Hannah and Sarah are so close again .
Stephen J