Andrew McKenzie is a junior in highschool when a strange incident sweeps the world. In the aftermath Andrew is left confused and unsure what's happening to him as he slowly begins to notice changes.
I groaned as I started coming out of a deep sleep. I felt weak and everything was a bit fuzzy as I rubbed my eyes. “Ow” I said as I scratched myself with one of my fingernails. Normally I kept my nails trim so I wasn’t used to scratching myself with them and was a bit confused. Taking a breath my chest felt heavy as if something was pressing down on it lightly.
I stirred again and finally opened my eyes this time. I was still early and the room was dark. My mother still sleep on the cot laid on her side with her back to me. Squirming I sat up in bed and couldn’t shake the fuzziness from my head. I yawned and blinked adjusting to the dark the weight on my chest still lingered so I put my hand to it.
“MOM!” I screamed in a panic as I held my chest with both hands now. I started crying and at my startled scream my mother shot up and flicked on the light. It must have been a shock seeing her son holding his breasts for the first time because I watched my mother collapse as she fainted by my bed. I screamed my voice breaking the highest it had yet into an even higher pitched call for help.
In no time several nurses ran into the room and went to aid my mother. I leaned over to look at my mother on the floor and got a face full of light brown hair. My god my hair was even longer today it was almost down to my chin now. Suddenly my own problems returned and as the nurses helped my mother I staggered out of the bed on the other side taking the IV with me.
I felt so weak as I walked over to the mirror staring at some tiny feet I was struggling to believe were mine. I had resisted looking in the mirror as I walked over to it trying to delay the sight of changes I could feel had occurred. “Calm yourself Andrew” my mind told me. “Whatever has happened they can fix it you have a team coming to help you.”
I took a deep breath and finally raised my head. The image in the mirror hit me like a ton of bricks and I felt light-headed. Before I knew it the room went black and I wondered who turned out the lights as I too collapsed to the floor fainting like my mother had.
My head hurt as I started to regain consciousness. I heard the voices of a couple of my nurses and then Doctor Foster talking with my mother and I could feel I was back in bed. “Mom?” I said softly this time as my eyes blinked back to life and focused. “Are you ok?”
“Oh honey I’m fine...Are you ok?” I swallowed my mouth was dry and speaking made my throat itch even more than it had the day before. My mother and doctor foster stood beside my bed looking down at me as she held my hand.
“Unless that was a dream. I don’t think I am.” I couldn’t help it. I started crying harder than I had ever cried in my life. I felt my mother pull me up into a hug and begin to rub my back as she tried to sooth me.
“It’ll be ok. The Doctor Foster is here now they’ll figure something out.” rocking me in her arms I buried my face into my mother’s shoulder.
“I’m sorry Andrew. I don’t know how this happened but the hormone treatment we were giving you obviously didn’t work. We already got more blood work from you and I’ve contacted the team coming from the CDC. They know what’s happened and they’ll be here in a few more hours.” For the first time I could hear a little distress in Doctor Foster’s voice now.
“What’s happening to me!?” I asked sobbing into my mother’s shoulder the whole time.
There was a long pause before Doctor Foster answered me. “I don’t know... This isn’t possible medically. It has to be related to that cloud. I realize these changes are drastic but when the team gets here I promise we’ll do everything we can to help you.”
My stomach sank I felt sick and quickly leaned away from my mother grabbing the bucket I had been given the night before. Having nothing in me from getting sick I only heaved a couple of times with no results this time. Looking up put me face to face with my reflection again in the mirror though.
Who was that? It looked a little like my sister and mother but very little like myself. I could tell I was still in there but it seemed I was fading behind the changes. The length of my hair and size of my chest wasn’t the only thing that had changed last night. I had to look again it was like that urge people get to stare at a car crash. You don’t really want to see the blood and guts but you just can’t help look for it.
I placed my feet under me again. They look so tiny now as I stared at them before taking a breath and walking over to the mirror again. Everything looked smaller or bigger even with the hospital gown still on. I had to see. I didn’t even care who was in the room it was like I was like I was hypnotised by my image in the mirror as I slipped the gown off.
A gasp came from behind me and I could see my mother on the bed covering her mouth in the mirror behind me. Her shock was justified. My hips were even wider today, my waist tighter, and of course my chest. Yesterday I might have had breast buds but today I had breasts. They weren’t huge but they were female. Even my nipples had changed they seemed bigger and the dark area around them definitely was.
My hands hung limply at my side and I could see my fingernails extend past my small thin fingers. No wonder I had scratched myself. They had grown longer than I had ever let them get over night. My hands looked delicate and they weren’t the only thing. My arms lacked definition too. The little bit of muscle I had there before was gone and it was the same through my entire body. No wonder I felt weak I had lost most the muscle that I’d had only a couple of days ago.
It was striking staring at myself in the mirror and it was hard not to see the feminine figure my body now cut. Along with some more small changes to the shape of my face it was getting harder to believe the person in the mirror was male. With tears streaming down my face only one thing made my gender clear and as I stood there naked even it looked smaller in the mirror hanging there between my legs.
After I stood there naked for a bit and in shock unable to look away my mother finally came over and picked up the hospital gown draping it back over me. It wasn’t until that moment that I was finally able to tear myself away from the mirror. Turning around I buried my face in my mother’s shoulder again and I felt her close the hospital in the gown to cover my back side.
We stood there for a moment or two before she finally lead me back to the bed. At some point Doctor Foster had quietly left the room to leave us alone and the two of us now sat there staring at my hand as my mother held it.
Sitting beside the bed my mother was the first to break the silence. She reached up and brushed the hair from my face lifting my head up and met my eyes. “Nothing that has happened or will happen will change how much I love you Andrew. You’re my child and I’m always going to be here for you no matter what. I want you to know that and have no doubt about it.”
My lip quivered and I started crying again as I saw tears roll down her cheeks. “I love you too mom, but did you have to make me cry again?” We both laughed and little then attempted to clean ourselves up.
“Oh god this feels so weird mom. It’s like I’m in someone else’s body but it still feels like mine despite the changes.”
“Believe it or not I know the feeling honey. This probably isn’t what you want to hear but I think every girl feels like that when their body starts changing. I think you guys certainly have it easier during that time. The changes you all go through just aren’t as drastic as what we deal with. I know it’s a lot to deal with but you are kind of getting a taste of that.”
She was right again and seemed to be on a roll lately. I was getting a taste of what a girl goes through and I was not enjoying it. “Let’s hope a taste is all I get and these doctors can find a way to fix this.”
My mother smiled at me. “It may not help hun but for now at least you have a pretty face like your sister. No one would doubt you two are related any more.” I hated to admit it but she was right I looked a lot more like my sister now. Growing up whenever we were together no one ever thought we were brother and sister. So looking even a little like her now was another drastic change. Like she said though it didn’t help me feel any better.
We sat there for the next few hours chatting and for the first time in my life I felt really close to my mother. I could tell how much she loved me and although things were difficult (like every time I looked in the mirror) it made it easier having her there. It’s weird how struggles can bring people closer like that and the one silver lining in this cloud was that it’d done that for my mother and I.
Nurses came in and out checking on us and for the first time since lunch the day before I was able to eat something and keep it down. I don’t know if the food actually was that good or I was just hungry but my mother laughed at the noises I made while enjoying my breakfast. “What? this is so good!” I protested.
“It certainly sounds like it but it’s still hospital food.” Stealing a bit from my tray my mother made a face. “You must be really hungry.”
I shrugged and continued my meal a bit surprised by how fast I filled up. Normally I had a huge appetite and could have cleaned the plate but there was still food left behind this time when the nurse came to collect the tray. Sitting there in the hospital bed I let out a sigh feeling extremely full and then felt the tingle telling me I had to pee.
Climbing from the bed I head to the bathroom hit by the weak feeling again. The loss of a lot of my muscle mass was very noticeable and time I stood up or moved. Gravity seemed heavier so I slowly made my way to the bathroom and feeling drained when I got there I hiked up the gown and sat to pee. I tried to not really look at things but just walking I could feel a difference. My hips seemed massively wide to me now. They weren’t of course. I was no bigger than say my sister but the drastic change had made it feel like I was a cartoon character with giant boobs and a massive ass.
Just as I got back to my bed there was a knock on the door and my sister’s voice from behind it. When she entered I kinda hoped she might faint seeing me so I gave her a big smile. Staring at me her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open but she remained on her feet.
“Wow… I know you said he’d change a lot more but...WOW!” Slowly my sister approached the bed and took it all in while a glared at my mother.
“You warned her? Aww I wanted to see if she’d faint like you did.” My mother gave me a disapproving look. “You fainted too and yes I warned her I think one member of our family in the hospital is enough. The last thing I need is your sister passing out and cracking her head open. Be nice.”
Still staring at me Amanda’s eyes roamed over me and stopped at my chest where the hospital gown now bulged out. “So you have actual breasts now?”
“For now it seems so.” I groaned covering my chest and my sister looked at my mother. “Wow. I know you told me but seeing him in person. This doesn’t seem real.”
I agreed with a nod. “You got that right.”
“How are you? I mean...wow just look at you. How are you dealing with this?” Taken back I was surprised as my sister’s voice quivered and she wiped tears from her eyes.
Seeing her show such concern and start crying started me up again too followed in short order by my mother. “Oh great here I go again. I’m ok Amanda it’s not easy but I’m dealing with it and there’s still hope.” The three of us now crying together my mother took my sister’s hand and pulled her closer to us. I couldn’t help it seeing her standing there crying I reached out and grabbed her pulling her into a hug. Wrapping her arms around me she returned it and we comforted each other for a moment.
I had always loved my sister but we had always been very different people so most of our interactions prior to this were teasing each other. Suddenly that seemed stupid and yet another relationship between a family member and myself changed that morning. Catching our breath we all started cleaning up again with tissues drying our eyes.
“We are going to have to get more tissues if people are going to keep crying around me.” I joked with a smile on my face as my sister and mother laughed a little.
“So do they still hurt like yesterday?” My sister asked pointing at her own breasts.
“I hadn’t thought about it I don’t know.” Taking a breath I placed my hand on one of my breasts and felt it with my fingers. Not actually wanting to look at it my eyes remained straight ahead as I checked. “It doesn’t seem so no.”
“Well at least that’s something?” I nodded agreeing that no longer having that pain was better. I just didn’t know if it was better than not having very female breasts now.
“Oh! I almost forgot!” my sister said suddenly and took the remote to the TV. Between the drama of the morning so far, eating, and talking to my mother I hadn’t turned the TV on yet that day. “The news stations were reporting this morning that all the people infected like you were males and that they all seem to be having the same issues as you.”
“More evidence that the cloud did this. Have any more victims come forward?” I asked as my sister flipped channels and my mother and I listened to what she had heard.
“Yeah two more in the US. Not sure about anywhere else.” Two more in the US so that makes seven. Seven people in the whole country get infected by this thing and I have to be one of them. There had to be more there’s no way I was that unlucky.
Finally my sister found a news channel actually doing an update on the cloud and those affected by it. Confirming everything my sister had said I watched the two reporters speak one of them in a studio and the other in front of a hospital.
“Holy crap!” I said covering my face as I noticed what hospital the female reporter was in front of. “That’s this hospital.”
“Oh my god it is!” My sistered confirmed. “They must have just got her they weren’t out there when I came in. You think they know it’s you being treated?”
“God I hope not...turn it up!” Raising the volume we all grew quiet as the reported spoke.
“Yes Dan I’m standing in front of Crestview hospital just outside of New York. According to authorities one of the 7 people affected by the cloud which passed over our state two days go is currently being treated here. I young male in his teens according to sources in the hospital he has seen several drastic changes to his body as of yesterday.”
I couldn’t believe they were talking about me and this wasn’t a local channel even this was national television. I was numb watching and hoping they didn’t say my name as the camera returned to a split screen of the male anchor in the studio and the field reporter.
“What sort of changes Susan?”
“Well Dan according to our sources he seems to be suffering from breast growth, weight loss, and a general feminizing of his entire body possibly do to elevated female hormone levels as a result of the cloud.”
How did they know so much? This was a nightmare. “Unbelievable. Has the young man been identified yet Susan?”
I gasped as the camera went back to a view outside my hospital with the female report. “Not at this time Dan. Out of respect for the young man and his family as they struggle during this difficult incident the hospital is refusing to release a name.”
“Thank you Susan...Stay tuned for more information on the aftermath of this mysterious cloud.” I let out a sigh of relief as the channel went to commercial. For now I was still just an anonymous victim as my sister expressed it verbally.
“Thank god they don’t know your name yet.” I leaned forward and covered my face with my hands as she flipped channels again.
“It doesn’t matter they will soon enough. Everyone in my class and probably entire school knows it was me taken to the hospital. Not counting everyone from your school you may have told and everyone who reads your facebook or twitter...mom’s too. It’s only a matter of time.”
Frantically my mother and sister both jumped on their phones and started contacting people making sure no one would tell. I couldn’t help but smile seeing how hard they were working to protect me. As they worked I took over flipping channels from my sister. I knew that even if they got everyone they knew to keep quiet it was still getting out. Someone at my school as bound to talk.
Finally just before lunch the team from the CDC arrived and Doctor Foster brought them all in. After meeting them I was examined fully by the group and measured which both were incredibly embarrassing to go through with people I’d only just met. I teared up several times before they were done but for a bunch of doctors they all seemed very understand and compassionate. When they finally finished the head of the team a Doctor Phillips and Doctor Foster stayed behind to talk with me and my family.
“We have some more results from you blood work this time Andrew. Whatever this is isn’t a result of the high estrogen in your system. That’s just a symptom of it. Normally we don’t test DNA for gender but when I saw you this morning I made sure your’s was this time.”
What do you mean test for gender?” I asked. “Why would you do that I’m male you know that you saw me when I came in. I don’t understand why that would be in question just because I look a little more female now?”
“It’s not Andrew.” The older man and head of the CDC doctors told me. Wearing a long white doctor's coat with salt and pepper hair and street clothes underneath he looked at me through his glasses. “Doctor Foster had your previous blood tested as well. The first blood drawn from you two days ago show XY chromosomes indicating male DNA. The second test though showed XXY normally this is called intersexed but it’s not something that can just develop people are born with it or not. Somehow though you gained an extra chromosome yesterday.”
He paused and I could tell he was trying to be gentle but I wanted to know more. “Well what did my blood for today show?”
“The blood from today showed you now have XX chromosomes your DNA is completely female. It was tested several times and the results stayed the same. Needless to say this isn’t possible in modern medicine and neither is the changes you have experienced in such a time period.”
Removing his glasses Doctor Phillips rubbed his eyes. I could tell he’d been up a while and that he was trying to help me. He seemed nice and I didn’t like that what was happening to me was causing other people like Doctors Foster and Phillips stress.
“So what now?” my mother asked when the doctor paused too long.
“Now Ms. Mckenzie we are going to do everything we can to figure out how this happened and what we can do at this point to help your son. However as I said changing a person's chromosomes is beyond our capabilities in this day and age so I’m afraid there isn’t much we can do about what has already happened.”
I swallowed and teared up. “So I’m stuck like this?”
“I’m afraid you are for now. We’re in communication with other teams as far away as Asia dealing with cases somewhat further along the you. From what we know we don’t think this has run its course yet and until it does it wouldn’t be a good idea to start trying to trying to fix what it’s done to you. Once it’s done though we can aid you if you desire in at least reverting your appearance somewhat.”
“Wait.” my mother stopped him. “Reverting his appearance but not fixing what’s been done to his DNA?”
“Yes Ma’am.” Doctor Phillips said keeping it short and clear.
“I think that is something Andrew and I will have to think about first before agreeing with.” I looked at my mother in shock but I didn’t say anything I was still processing that she would think I would want to do everything to change my body back to how it was.
“Of course for now though we would like to run some more tests and scans Andrew. I know you have been through a lot but every bit of information we can get could help us.” I nodded and agreed to the tests wanting to help as much as I could.
Wasting no time as soon as I was done talking with the doctors I was taken for x-rays of my entire body. Then more sonograms of area’s other then my chest. Everywhere I went there were different member of the CDC team that had come in with Doctor Phillips to give me a different test. I felt like a lab rat as the day stretched on until finally I was able to get back to my room.
After three days now stuck in this hospital my room was starting to feel like home and I was glad to see it again along with my sister and mother. I was finally able to eat again and even though I was starving I was unable to finish my food. My height and weight had been taken again earlier and I already knew I was 10 more pounds lighter and now almost three inches shorter then when I arrived. I noticed when I stood now I was almost the same height as my sister despite being taller than her my entire life, and with how little I could eat I was never gaining the weight back I had lost.
After a drama and loaded day it was finally over. As I said goodbye to my sister with a hug she told me she’d see me tomorrow and then head home for the night. My mother was staying with my again which was fine I wanted her there with me and I wanted to talk to her about her comment earlier.
When it was just her and I left in the room I couldn’t hold it in any longer. “Why did you tell the doctor’s we’d have to think about it before I committed to them fixing my body?”
She sighed and took my hand as I sat in bed. “Your body has changed a lot, and I just don’t think you should rush into changing it again when the results are never going to be what you had before. They can’t give you that back all they can do is give you something else.”
“Maybe but at least that something else would be male again. I could never live as a guy the way I am now.” I sighed and knew she was trying to help but I felt like she didn’t understand.
“You’re right you could never live as a guy the way you are now. No one would believe you but you could live as a girl easily and the changes aren’t complete so who knows.” I was shocked at what she was suggesting.
“A girl? What? No. I couldn’t be a girl.” My mother held my hand tighter now with both hands.
“Look into that mirror and tell me people wouldn’t absolutely believe you were a girl just from your appearance. Even your voice has gotten higher. Listen I’m not saying you have to stay this way if you really don’t want to but before you go changing things I think you should at least live in this body a while.”
I didn’t know what to say I looked at the mirror and she was right I would pass as a girl just as easily as she or my sister did everyday. Could I really do that though. I was a guy two days ago before this cloud.
I looked back at my mother and she smiled. “I just want you to have options honey and this is one. It’s probably the easiest one at this point. Your sister and I could help you and you’d pick it up in no time. On the other hand if you do wish to change your body back it won’t be easy. It’ll be a lot of work and a lot of pain to become someone else for a third time. I want you to take your time and decide either way I’m behind you.”
“Thanks mom. I will.” I sat there thinking while my mother excused herself to go down and get a late dinner at the hospital cafeteria. I was surprised by how much my mother’s argument made me doubt things. When it was first brought up by the doctors I was certain I wanted to change back as soon as possible, but now I had doubts. Big ones.
I had a lot to think about and I did so for the rest of the night except for a couple more chats with my mother once she returned from eating. It was getting really late now and I knew I had to sleep. Already my mother and dozed off on her cot, but I was worried. I didn’t know why but these changes seemed to happen over night while I slept. What would change tonight I wondered. I had resigned myself that it was going to happen, but I was still scared to actually sleep. Eventually though I couldn’t fights it. I was just so tired and my eyes were to heavy. I couldn’t resist any longer.
Comments
His mom has it right. Even if
His mom has it right. Even if they can give him the usual FtM surgeries, etc, what he'd wind up with wouldn't be that close to what he had.
and, of course, whatever is doing this may "fix" any attempts like that anyway.
Brooke brooke at shadowgard dot com
http://brooke.shadowgard.com/
Girls will be boys, and boys will be girls
It's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world
"Lola", the Kinks
Seems to me, once her new
Seems to me, once her new body is completed in its change from male to female, there is not going to be a lot she, her mom, or the doctors can do to make it all go away and s/he goes back to being male. Her mom is telling her this now, and I do believe she needs to accept that fact and move on with her new life.
At least she is not alone in all this. Her sister and mom are in it with her also. And THAT is a good thing.
Hope her community will
Hope her community will respect her new identity
and offer a chance to find herself and fit in.
alissa
I hope they go after whomever
I hope they go after whomever talked in the hospital but I fear they could care less, it's free publicity for the hospital and from now on the CDC is in control of Andrew's care.
I don't trust the government though. They may appear to want to help but there will be someone in it who wants to study the victims and exploit them for their own curiosity in the name of "public health" or "scientific necessity" or some other excuse. There's a fortune and/or reputation to be made through the victims and someone will try to make it, their rights or feelings be damned.
I'm told STFU more times in a day than most people get told in a lifetime
I'm A Little Upset...
...that they've found "cases somewhat further along than [Andrew]," but nobody asked or volunteered what the next phase would be. As convenient as it is for readers to be left in suspense, there's just no reason to keep Andrew in the dark on that. In fact, the opposite would seem to be the case, since further changes might be easier to cope with if he knew in advance what to look for. For that matter, for all they know, conscious resistance may be able to inhibit the process; it's presumably not accidental that it's all been taking place at night while he's asleep.
All available signs seem to point to the transition to his female self having been completed: he seems to have all the characteristics -- family resemblance, height, weight, voice, foot size, chromosomes, hormones -- that he'd have had if he'd been born female. (I suppose we don't know whether he has a female reproductive system yet; I'd guess that was what today's sonogram was supposed to determine. Can't see any reason why he wouldn't.) He's able to eat again without throwing up.
So any further phases would probably fall into a different, more ominous category. (Brain changes? Immaculate conception? ESP? Nonhuman body parts? Direct real-time communication with the cloud creator?) If they had discovered something along those lines in the few
patients who have had an extra night since the cloud hit, telling him would seem critical -- or explaining to him and us why they're not.
Eric
Well, he's not completely
Well, he's not completely female yet. He still has his penis, and one would assume from lack of mention that he still has his scrotum and *doesn't* have a vaginal opening yet.
The loss of muscle is a bit odd as that wasn't exactly *necessary* to become female.
It's still *possible* that he could become a bilateral hermaphrodite. Though the loss of muscle makes that less likely.
And for that matter the change from XY to XXY to XX argues against it as well.
For that matter, now that I think about it, that change is a bit odd as well. Since the Y chromosome is just (for most practical purposes) a shortened X chromosome, it shouldn't have been necessary to double the X chromosome then eliminate the Y.
Instead, it would have made more sense to just add the missing genes to the Y chromosome.
Which brings up another detail. Where did the extra X come from? If I was the researchers, I'd be sequencing the heck out of the X chromosomes on the victims.
If I was writing this, they'd all have one X chromosome that was identical to the original and one that was different. And the different one would be identical on all of them.
Brooke brooke at shadowgard dot com
http://brooke.shadowgard.com/
Girls will be boys, and boys will be girls
It's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world
"Lola", the Kinks
I don't see a silver lining...
If I were that young girl, right now I would be terrified (not about being changed into a [HORRORS!] a a girl!). I would be terrified about the government, some dastardly criminals or a mob of "German Villagers" armed with torches!
My first pulse would be to play along until I could quietly whisper to my sister to sneak in some clothes and some money then I would try to run and hide.
Paranoia?
I don't want you to get the idea that I'm paranoid, but I know you're all out to get me!