Warning sexual scenes from the start of this chapter

I was still in heaven when his limp manhood slipped out of me. I could actually feel everything that was happening to me.
He took his weight back onto his elbows and stroked my face as I was still in ecstasy as far as I was concerned I had died and gone to heaven.

He gently kissed my lips, slowly bringing me down to earth. I opened my eyes and looked into his my slender arm curled around his neck and I pulled him to me saying; “I love you”.
That was it pure and simple, he looked at me with so much love in his eyes and whispered, “And I love you so very, very much”.

He slid off me, taking me into his arms holding me close stroking and caressing my trembling body.
As I calmed down I snuggled close to him snuffling into him relishing his wonderful man scent.
Stroking my hair he said, “I hate to be practical here, but it’s after two and we have to be in the office at ten”.
Smiling up at him I retorted; “Typical man! Have your evil way then want to go to sleep”.
Looking indignant he protested; “No! It’s not that you have to make a good impression as it’s the first time you will have met the board.”
I snuggled into him pouting and saying, “Well ok but please be here when I wake up”.

He promised me faithfully that he would be here kissing me to seal his promise.
I slipped out of bed to get ready for sleep taking my make up off and douching before putting intensive night renewal cream on and of course brushing my hair.

Before I started brushing I put an ivory silk nightdress on with lace around the bodice spaghetti straps it dropped down to mid calf.
As I brushed my hair I watched his reflection in the mirror wondering if I had done the right thing after all underneath this exterior I was still a man, was I horrid in leading him on like this?
From the bed he asked, “Do you brush your hair every night?” I smiled at him replying; “Every night and every morning doing this is so calming and therapeutic also it makes my hair shine”.
He got out of bed and went to the bathroom, when he came out he stood behind me and asked. “Can I brush it for you?” Without saying a word I handed him my brush and he started brushing my hair.
I said to him, “I hope you are keeping count”. “Why” he asked, “Well one hundred strokes is what I do when you took over I was at seventy six”.
Grinning he answered, “Well I’m up to ninety now” he gave me the final strokes and handed me the brush. I swivelled around on the vanity stool and put my arms around his waist resting my head on his six-pack.
I noticed that someone was getting excited again I just couldn’t resist so I caressed his rapidly stiffening member with my finger nails, smiling to myself as it twitched under my ministrations.

The livid purple head of his shaft was ready for my lips so I lowered my head and licked around his shaft I heard him moan softly.
My tongue continued licking while my nails ever so gently caressed his balls and scratched his rampant manhood.
Opening my mouth I started to take his gorgeous dick into my mouth sucking and licking making sure he was well lubricated with my saliva.
As his shaft touched the back of my throat I gagged slightly but I was determined to please my man fully.
Soon I was sucking and moving up and down the shaft that gives a woman so much pleasure his moaning increased as he stroked my bobbing head. Whispering my name and telling me that he loved me all too soon his moaning increased and he breathed, “Nichola I’m Cumming oh god I’m Cumming!”
I was determined to taste my lovers seed so redoubled my efforts I felt him pulse then his seed hit the back of my throat greedily I swallowed not wanting to waste a drop of his precious semen.

As his tidal wave stopped I started licking his rapidly deflating dick clean he slid his hands under my arms and drew me up towards him kissing me passionately.
“Was that good?” I whispered he looked at me with so much love saying; “I love and adore you Nichola MacKinnon so very, very much”
With that he walked me to the bed getting in I anxiously asked, “You’ll be here when I wake up?” Gently kissing me he whispered, “I’ll wake you with a kiss my love” then spooning up to me one hand cradling my breast we fell asleep.

I was awoke by a gentle kiss on my lips moaning I opened my eyes to see Brett lying there his head resting on his hands, looking at me intently.
“Hi beautiful” he whispered. “Hi yourself” I answered with a smile, “What are you looking at?” I continued.
“You” he answered, “I’ve been watching you while you were sleeping it reminded me of the Bon Jovi song.”
I smiled up at him and answered, “And I was dreaming of you while I was sleeping”. Grinning he said; “You know the track?” “Of course I do” I responded, “But what time is it?”
“Oh” he said, “Seven thirty, “We’ve got to be ready in two hours so I thought I had better wake you.” I stretched my arm around his neck and drew him to me kissing him passionately mumbling through the kiss, “It’s a shame we don’t have more time”
He stroked my face saying; “There’ll be other times – I hope! But you have to impress today sweetheart”.
“I Know, I know but you can bet your sweet ass that they’ll be other times” I told him climbing out of bed.
Brett started dressing as I went into the bathroom. I kissed him passionately whispering, “See you down stairs darling” he left to get changed and I shot into the shower.
I completed my morning routine then decided what I was to wear. As I was going to work this was easy, a smart business suit.
So I selected a taupe single breasted suit, straight pencil skirt and a fitted jacket. The suit was in a wool silk mix a cream silk blouse with a modest neckline that tied with a silk bow. My shoes were brown courts with a 3” stiletto heel!
Being tall I had to take care what size heels I wore since I have been living as Nichola I have grown to love heels of 4” and above but this makes me over 6’ tall, which some insecure men find intimidating hence my preference for tall men or men that are shorter than me but secure in their own body.

I was down at breakfast for 8:45, grabbed coffee and toast and was ready for the car picking us up at 9:45.
Amy made the comment that I looked like a woman who had been satisfied last night. I blushed and said nothing then Brett arrived looking like the cat that had got the cream and Amy simply said, “Ahhh, now I understand”.
Amy was dressed casually as she was exploring New York on her own as Brett was in the office with us. Fiona and I were dressed for the office, every bit the professional girls.

As we left, Brett told Amy that the car (and driver) was hers for the day and should be back shortly after 10. He suggested that the driver take her for a tour of the city and surrounding area as long as he was there to pick us up by 4 when we finished.

It was a short drive to the head office both Fiona and I told Brett that we could easily walk the distance. He simply shrugged and agreed with us as long as we were certain.
When we got to the office we went through the security fingerprint screening and I went up to the global R & D section.
Fiona went to the HR and Brett went to his managers office in security he told us he would meet in in the foyer at four.

I met with my immediate boss Charles Winton he briefed me on the strategy the company was to pursue for the next period asked me how things were going. He commented that he was surprised that I was going into the London office on my official time off but then said that he knew I wouldn’t be able to stay away.

Then he took me around the head office side of R & D my head was mush with names. However he introduced me to my American equivalent Terrie who was to take me under her wing for the time I was in NY Terrie was a tall woman of about 30 a nice trim figure (toned through doing marathons and Iron Men contests!)
I asked why they called them iron men when obviously she was a woman! Laughing she told me that it was just the way of it.
She sorted me out with a work space adjacent to her’s and filled my in on what would be expected of the Western European side of operations.
All the time I was taking notes and questioning filing things away in my mind lunch came and went and all too soon it was four in the afternoon.
Terrie and I got on really well! She said she would see me tonight at the cocktail party.

I met the others in the foyer and we walked back to our hotel on arrival we decided on a coffee I ordered tea, and saw Fiona grimace. I soon found out why
for some reason I couldn’t get it as strong as I liked it.
So I ended up having coffee, which by the way is the best in the world.

We went upstairs to get ready, Brett said; he would come and pick me up at six this gave me an hour!
I showered and decided I would wear a short cocktail dress in lavender Charmeuse satin and lace. It had a sweetheart neckline a back zip that finished just below my shoulder blades. It was very close fitting with a built in bra and boning to the body however it was not ultra short it’s hem being about 3” above my knees.
My shoulders were bare so I wore a lace shawl as a cover up silver 4” heeled evening sandals and matching purse.
My make up was smoky eyes, hints of lavender eye shadow, deep red lipstick my perfume being my favourite ‘Estee Beautiful’
I was ready when Brett arrived - well nearly it only took five minutes to finish off, and then we met the others downstairs.
Brett looked hunky in a lounge suit shirt and tie his chiselled jaw freshly shaved he smelt of man and aftershave and just looking at him turned me on.

As usual the car was waiting and it took us to the Columbus Circle, WOW is was a shopping mall to die for we told Brett that we knew what we were doing tomorrow our free day. He grimaced and reluctantly said, “Oh ok if I must but I’m supposed to take you on a tour of the city!” “Sweetheart” I said, “For us girls this place will keep us busy all day why don’t you have a rest from us – go and see your folks”.
He was torn as I realised that being in his home town and not being able to visit his family must be hard so I pushed him some more and with Fiona’s help finally got him to agree.

Now the Stone Roses Lounge this is on the 4th floor of the Time Warner Centre it a really elegant lounge and looks amazing. It has a wide selection of drinks and some wonderful food well worth a visit, there was about 30 people in our party and the conversation was wonderful.
I met Brett’s boss who flirted with me outrageously much to the amusement of his wife Louise who said “don’t worry dear, he does this to all the pretty girls but is harmless!”
Brett did his job well and looked after the three of us but Amy was soon in a deep and meaningful conversation with a guy about 30 who Brett told me was an analyst on a similar fast track career as I was.
Fiona and Terrie were getting along really well as I watched I had the feeling that there was a sexual element to it as both of them had been married did they also like girls? Hmmmm interesting I’ll file it away for future reference.
My boss Charles and his lovely wife Barbara (who knew the real Nichola) when we sat down sat with Brett and myself Barbara was asking me about different people who she had met in London and who to be honest I only very vaguely knew from reading Nichola’s diaries.
This meant I had to blag a lot of the conversation but I seemed to get away with it. However Barbara must have picked up of something because she said to me “you know dear, there is something different about you, you seem more assertive and if you don’t mind me saying more masculine! Even though you are obviously a very feminine young woman.”
This shook me to the core, what had I done wrong what had she seen. I told her the story of Sophie and said that her having a breakdown had made me decide to be more assertive.

Barbara looked at me shrewdly and said, “Don’t worry my dear your secret is safe with me but if I may a word of advice; don’t become too hard nosed. Your vulnerability is a charming trait and catches men off guard. Mix the two and you will succeed let one or the other rise to the top and you will also succeed but will either be hated for being too masculine or taken advantage of for being too accommodating”
Needless to say that did make me think deeply! What was I doing wrong?

While I was pondering, I watched Fiona and Terrie; their actions were interesting to say the least the amount of touching and stroking were way more than colleagues.
I wondered if they were both bisexual then I wondered if Fiona found me sexually attractive? Or thinking about it Terrie as she was also an attractive woman!
Hell my mind was in a real mess it was probably that they were good friends, nothing sexual at all!

These thoughts were circulating in my head while I was chatting away with the others on my table and to be honest I was getting excited at the thought.
I suppose - no, I knew I was bisexual but how did one woman get the attention of another woman?
This part of my female education had been omitted but seeing as I was a male I assume it will be subtle, anyhow that is for another day tonight I have a night of passion with Brett!

The evening carried on, eventually people started drifting away about midnight we decided that we would head off back to the hotel.
The car was waiting for us and three of us Amy Brett and myself clambered aboard.
Fiona had disappeared with Terrie confirming my suspicions – good luck to the girl she deserves it.
When we got back to the hotel we headed for our rooms. I kissed good night to Amy feeling sorry for her she was the most attractive of the three of us yet she was alone.
Tomorrow night seeing as Brett would be away I would see if she wants company! As much as I enjoy Brett making love to me I really enjoy making love as a girl to a girl – does that make me lesbian bisexual or what?

Brett and I walked slowly to my bedroom his arm around my waist. I was snuggled into him pressing my soft breast against the side of his chest. As we walked he did seem a little pre-occupied but I put this down to him not being completely happy with leaving us tomorrow.
I passed him the key card for my room and waited while he opened the door we went inside and my arms snaked around his neck my lips urgently seeking his he kissed me in return but I sensed that his heart was just not in it.

Frantically I went over in my mind anything I may have done to upset him he held me away from him, looking at me, “Nicky” he whispered; “We have to talk there’s something I need to tell you” he sounded very serious.
Looking into his gorgeous eyes I said, “What do you mean, something you need to tell me are you married or something?” “No, no, nothing like that, it’s just well when I tell you you probably won’t want to see me again.” Now I was worried!
I walked over to the edge of the bed and sat down, saying, “If it’s that bad I had better sit down though I cannot imagine what is so terrible to stop me loving you”.

He looked at me sadly saying, “Just wait until you’ve heard me out” as he sat next to me on the bed.
We sat in silence for a while the air heavy with expectation, finally I said “Well come on spit it out the waiting is killing me”.
I watched as he took a deep breath this was obviously hard for him so I took hold of his hand and gently prompted him, “Well?”
Brett looked at me and blurted out, “Nicky you are the first girl I’ve ever been with!” I was stunned and managed to answer, “I’m truly honoured, but why should I hate you for that?”
Stricken he looked at me and stammered; “Y, y, y, you don’t understand god knows I hate hurting you but if I let this continue you would only wind up hating me more”.

Now I was worried I stroked his hand and gently asked him, “Brett honey nothing can be that bad as to stop me loving you so tell me – please!”
I could see him steel himself then he blurted the terrible truth out, “Nichola, I’m gay for god sake I’m gay, you see why I had to tell you!” He was in tears I looked at him and to my shame I giggled the irony of the situation was just too much for me!

I kissed his hands and said to him, “Is that all?” “All he screeched all! Isn’t that enough”.
I continued kissing his hands calming him down and then I told him, “Look, being gay doesn’t matter in the slightest I have many really good friends who are gay. But how do you feel about me? And about us? You have been sleeping with me and I had no idea but how do you feel? This is what’s important right now”.

He took a deep breath looking me straight in the eyes said, “Nichola, I love you more than anything in the world but there will always be the possibility of me getting attracted to men again the urge may be too strong for me to resist and above anything I don’t want to hurt you”.

“Phew” I gasped, “Where do we go from here?” Looking at me he said quietly “I don’t know but please don’t say anything at work some of the more conservative ones could stop my career”.

I exploded at that “WHAT, JUST BECAUSE OF YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION! THAT’S MEDEAVAL” he smiled wearily at me and my heart went out to him “But that’s the way it is” he simply answered.
I kissed him on the lips his arms slid around me and I felt him return my kiss – with interest and passion. Finally I broke away from him, and asked him, “And now? What do you want to do now? Do you want to stay or have some time to yourself?” And I warned him “If you answer my question with another question I’ll clock you!” He looked puzzled “you’ll what me?” he asked.
Grinning because he can’t have heard this expression before I explained, “I’ll slap you”.

“Oh” he answered, “I feel drained; if it’s ok I’ll go, but thanks for being cool about my secret”. I was devastated; I wanted him more than anything. I felt disgusted with myself for not telling him my secret but I needed to talk to my sister and my therapist my mind was in turmoil and at this moment I hated myself loathed myself I could ease his pain but didn’t have the guts!

We got off the bed and my arms slid around his neck pulling him close to try and change his mind he kissed me with passion but still made for the door.
Even though tears were brimming I held myself together saying as he left, “Promise me we’ll talk again you can’t leave me like this we need to talk further please, please promise me this small thing”

He took my face in his hands and gently kissed me whispering, “I promise, I promise and I’ll see you tomorrow night”.
With that he left I closed the door and slid down it sobbing tears streaming down my cheeks. If I had told him my secret things would have been fine but I was just too scared just too spineless I loathed myself.

I must have cried for over an hour when I eventually pulled myself together I phone my therapist in London. She realised that I was highly distraught and was very gentle with me probing and sensing my feelings and emotions
After an hour on the phone her advice to me was that if I thought it was right then tell Brett my secret.
After all, we both had secrets and it wasn’t fair me holding out on him she finished up by saying “Nichola, you have always had a very strong feeling of right and wrong trust your instincts on this because you obviously love Brett!”

I thanked her and sadly got ready for bed – alone brushing my long hair soothed me as usual tomorrow I was going to let Brett into my little secret hopefully he will not hate me too much for not telling him when he confessed to me.
I thought about talking to Amy, but as it was nearing four in the morning I let her sleep while I tossed and turned for the rest of the night.

I must have got some sleep but I still woke up early, showered and got ready for a days shopping, though my heart wasn’t in it at all. I had finished in the bathroom when there was a knock at my door Brett I thought, running to the door when I looked through the spyhole it was the next best thing Amy!
I opened the door and fell into her arms sobbing. I only had bra and panties on a couple passing in the hallway were exposed to the startling sight of a half naked woman sobbing in the arms of a surprised fully dressed woman!

Amy pulled me inside my room and sat me on the bed I told her all about last night. Including how I felt about myself and also about my conversation with Gwen my therapist. Amy calmed me down as only a sister could and with her usual astuteness got straight to the crux of my problem asking, “And how do you feel about Brett?” sniffling I answered, “I love him it’s ideal that he’s gay because I’m not a real woman!”

Amy smiled ironically at this and told me, “Then tell him girl tell him!” I looked at her and still sniffling asked, “Really?” she nodded replying, “Yes really now you go and make yourself stunning! We girls have got some serious shopping to do!”

I hugged her whispering, “Thanks a girl couldn’t have a better sister” she hugged me back and told me, “You’ve come a long way in a short time Nichola from a normal bloke to a hormone charged woman - it’s not easy being a girl is it sweetie?”

I looked at her, shook my head my long hair swishing around my face and quietly said, “No it’s not, and all these damn hormones are running riot” she smiled sardonically and said, “You can’t tell me anything about female hormones we tend to be a highly charged very emotional sex: me I’ve grown up like this so I’m used to it. You sweetheart are new – now go and get ready!”

Feeling a bit better and I resolved to confess my secret to Brett tonight. So I did as I was told; after I had given Amy a big hug telling her, “I’m so, so happy you’re my big sister”
I did my make up, a light daytime look, dressed in a floral sunray pleat skirt, a loose purple blouse, warm black tights and knee length boots with a 1” block heel, we went down to breakfast and met up with Fiona, who looked really happy and contented, sitting down we ordered a light breakfast and coffee then planned our shopping expedition.

I won’t bore you with the events of the day suffice to say we hit every shop that took our fancy spent far too much and went back to the hotel happy well Fiona and Amy were happy myself I still loathed myself for being spineless.

The only thing of note was that Fiona and I were in the changing room with me trying on a dress. When I was down to my underwear I noticed Fiona watching me intently I gave her a sultry smile to indicate (I think) that I was interested. Fiona said totally out of the blue, “Nichola, you are so attractive” then she blushed as though she had blurted out her innermost thoughts.
To relieve the tension I answered, “Thank you very much, coming from someone as beautiful as you that’s a real complement!” I gave her a kiss on the cheek our breasts brushed and it was like an electric shock had passed through me we just stood there looking at each other luckily (or unluckily depending on your point of view) Amy burst in carrying an armful of clothes to try on.