It is really hard to say this. I am finished with religion, particularly the Mormon Church. I feel so sad because I actually believe in the Mormon "stuff" too. They have been really loving and kind to me and I healed of so much stuff and pain.
The deal breaker was one faction of the church kept rolling me out as the stalking horse for their ideas for two reasons. By trotting me out, they could say to their critics, "see how nice we are, we are even letting this filthy creep in and showing "HIM" the love of Jesus Christ". The second reason was to use me as a battering ram to persuade their General Authority that since I was such a good girl they should accept me and award me my rightful privileges."
This has been going on for almost three years and has gotten to the point that the constant exposure and stress were tearing me down worse than I ever expected. This is a very sad day for me, and I hope that you will refrain from saying, "I told you so". As a matter of fact some of you DID tell me so but I just wanted to try to make things a little better for me and us.
I am heart broken over this but please do not worry about me. I promise to just cry it out and nothing more. Please, no calls to commiserate with me. I still love God and the church but just can not handle the pressure that some of them put on me any more. So, it is I who was weak and failed, not them.
Much love
Gwen
Comments
I'll Skype you when I can.
Hang on in there girl, we need to chat ... correction! You need to chat XXX Bevs.
I believe in God
and her love. It is us humans that muck things up. It is why I am not a member of a church, instead I try to live the life I think God and Jesus would approve of.
You have many friends here. I'll keep you in my prayers.
God is always there
It's humans who turned his teachings into garbage. I've always said that organised religion has outlived their time. It was great when science hadn't progressed much and mankind needs some explanation to their daily lives. Now that science has progressed, we find many of the old religion's values of organised religion contradict common logic and scientific understanding. Religion has also been used as an excuse to kill other people by bloodthirsty fanatics. Just look at Israel and Palestine. Both of them have the right to that land and they could've shared, probably even merge together to form a new ethnic group. But no, they had to kill each other, because their religions told them that the other's religion is shit.
Let's forget religion altogether. Become wiccans or pagans. Heck those guys are actually nicer than supposed 'nice' abrahamaic religions.
I have always felt
that organized religion and the church is like a banana peel. Once in a while I might get a good laugh out of it on it's own, if the conditions are right, but it's really just a packaging and not really a very attractive one. All of the really good and important stuff is what's found inside that peel and the package just isn't necessary to our continued survival. What's really important is the belief we hold inside us. True belief is a deeply personal thing and no other person or organization can or even should tell us how to experience it, nobody knows what's right for you but you. Continue believing but do it in your way without the restraints of 'organized' religion.
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
Churches
There is other churches such as Unitarian Universalist which lets their members practice how they want to practice religion and is mainly a non-denominational. There is Unity Church of Christ which is a christian religion that is also openly acceptable of lgbt and I belong to that group of churches. Most Lutheran churches are accepting of lgbt and is a christian based religion. Last one I know about is the MCC group which is another christian based group that is accepting of lgbt. I advise you speak with each church's minister and then attend a couple of sessions each to figure out which best fits your beliefs.
Hugs,
Jenna From FL
Moderator/Editor
TopShelf BigCloset
It is a long road ahead but I will finally become who I should be.
You haven't tried
Judaism or Zoroastrianism yet Gwen, or Hinduism or Sikhism. There's loads more yet, plus all the sects of Christianity. Then there's common sense and Humanism. Good luck, chasing rainbows is good fun but very frustrating.
Angharad
Living as a Man.
This spring or summer I want to go camping in the Oregon Outback and have found a place that is at least 40 miles from any urban lighting, on a plateau of some 5000 feet, in isolated solitude. In my youth, I loved amateur astronomy, and once had a small reflector, so plan to resume that hobby once again.
In the mean time, I must find ways to prevent any lights from coming on in my car, or cover them in red cellophane. Any camp lights I have must be red also.
Since I plan to be alone, safety will be a concern, so I will be frequenting used clothing stores to find men's pants and shirts. I'll have a crew cut and work on lowering my voice once again. I won't say what other preparations I shall undertake in the interest of not offending some of you. I can grow a surprising white beard in about 5 days. This sounds exciting. :)
I've found a small, wide field telescope to take and plan to sit out in the dark, listening to "Spem in Alium" at the loudest setting my stereo will withstand, as I watch the heavens progress across the sky.
This two weeks impersonating a man, I hope will once and for all settle that question.
Gwen