It has been a while since I've updated my blog. The second operation, which was supposed to repair the first operation, went much worse than my first. The doctor has literally ripped me new asshole. He tore two holes through the thin section between the rectum and vagina. For about a month some of my poots were coming out my vagina, which was not good. I was prescribed industrial strength antibiotics the day after surgery and did frequent follow ups. Looks like I'm through that part OK. Needless to say, it hurt (still does a bit).
A close friend invited me to tag along to a TG convention in Colorado, The Colorado Gold Rush, an annual event in Denver, Colorado. I got to consult with several top surgeons. I learned what I have are called fistulas, and it will take a year or so before most surgeons would be willing to attempt a fix, assuming they are willing to try. I will be getting a lawyer and keeping it close to my chest.
It did not help my mood for the surgeon (who was trying to talk me into living with a sealed vagina) kept asking if I had a boyfriend. Maybe not now, but does he expect me to never have a significant other? That one ticked me off even more.
Just to add to my drama the unemployment office is giving me a major run around. Their is no doubt I qualify, but I have yet to receive a check in 5 months. I am appealing. I suspect someone up there is messing with me because I am trans. Welcome to Texas.
The weird part is I'm doing better emotionally than I have in decades. It is like the gopher game, I address problems as they pop their heads up, and refuse to worry about what is currently out of my control. It mostly works, though my therapist seems more worried than me, about me.
Morpheus recently wrote a story called The Karma of Serenity that really resonated. I'm a girl now, I can finally be who I was meant to be. Compared to that, the rest is just details.
Comments
In the circumstances
it sounds as if you're doing really well. I'm sorry to hear that the 'repair' made things worse. It's quite tricky surgery and the bowel, bladder and vaginal space are all very confined. Let's hope the future will bring forward someone who is clever enough to fix the other guy's 'cock-up' (no pun intended) and that you will then have the wherewithal to have a relationship if you so choose.
Angharad
From what I have read so far about complications
... the geometry of the pelvic area has a definitive influence on the risk of getting a fistula or any GRS right for that matter. I've always had a a bit of a wider pelvic girdle then a typical male and my surgeon was conservative in how deep of a vagina he made for me as I had turned down using a graft of skin from my thigh. I am also very thin.
Surgical technique is critical of course. My surgeon also required I stay in bed for a week before removing the vaginal packing.
There are surgeons who will repair fistulas, I googled at least one surgeon, who looks like is in Thailand, who uses colon tissue to help seal it.
Sexual Reassignment Surgery.
I went to Bangkok, Thailand in August of 2007. Dr Kamol seemed to be very good but I discovered that they will dissemble to you unless you figure some things out. I would go again to the same Doctor.
He used some grafts off my tummy for unknown purposes, wasn't watching. :) I have 3 1/2 inch depth so I will never be a porn star. :( I was there for three weeks and experienced little or no pain at any time. Much to my surprise, when it came time for me to go home, they wanted me to stay an additional three weeks and seemed to be surprised that I was out of money.
I got home with a resistant strain of E-coli in my bladder, and that took time to heal.
Before I went, I knew that about 12% of these operations were experiencing complications at the time.
I hope you get well soon.
Gwen