There was a light shining in my eyes. It was bright and a little uncomfortable. I could feel a stethoscope against my chest. It was a little cold.
The cold actually gave me something to focus on. The grey started to fade and pass. I asked weakly, “Am I ok?”
The continuing adventures of Caitlin O'Rourke, Sorority Boy.
Disclaimer
This is a work of fiction. There should be no way that these characters are like anyone else, but if that isn’t the case, it has definitely been unintentional. Also, if you happen to find that your life is represented in these pages, I’ll be impressed.
Sorority Boy
By poetheather
Chap 3
There was a light shining in my eyes. It was bright and a little uncomfortable. I could feel a stethoscope against my chest. It was a little cold.
The cold actually gave me something to focus on. The grey started to fade and pass. I asked weakly, “Am I ok?”
The Hispanic woman looking down at me smiled. She was very pretty, but there was something about her eyes that seemed odd. “I think so. How do you feel?”
“Just tired.” I felt like I was a dishrag that had been wrung out and tossed onto the floor. Actually make that the dirty ground.
She checked my pulse again, looking at her watch. She seemed to be thinking. “Do you hurt anywhere?”
I thought about it. I didn’t hurt so much a have slight aches. The exhaustion was the big thing. Nothing hurt anymore but I didn’t really feel like moving. “No…I guess I’m just all wrung out.”
The woman, who I assumed was Sarah, nodded. Did I just confirm something for her? “It sounds like what you had was a panic attack. Heart attacks are rare in people of your age and there were a few symptoms you missed for the classic MI description. We can take you to the ER if you want, but they’ll only run some blood and give you an EKG to make sure that you didn’t have a heart attack. Other than that, you just need to relax and de-stress.”
Sarah turned to Meredith. “You take care of her. She needs very little stress at this time and lots of rest. I will be very grumpy if you don’t make this happen.”
Meredith just nodded, agreeing with the girl. Sarah grabbed her fairly large army green first aid bag and slung it onto her shoulder. She turned back and looked at me with her strong brown eyes. “So, Caitlin, to the hospital or not?”
I lay there on the bed, turned to face her. Her short, dark hair framed her face well. She was quite fit and attractive. Like a Hispanic Sarah Connor. Did I want to go to the hospital? She seemed to think that this was an option. I had to ask, “Just a panic attack?”
“That’s my call. But you get to decide what we do.”
“I wasn’t overly worried at this point. I was feeling better, things weren’t grey or from a tunnel. And if she felt confident then I would agree with her. “I’ll stay here.”
She nodded. “I’ll check on you in the morning. If you are still weak then, nauseous or have any other symptoms I’m dragging you to the ER. Clear?”
After we nodded she left and I turned my head to look at Merri. She saw the questioning look and replied, “Sarah was a medic in the Army. She did time in Kosovo and Afghanistan. She is pre-med and a fully qualified EMT. So, I guess we need to listen to her. We need to make sure you’re relaxed. Should I call the Spa and get you in for a relaxing massage?”
“She was in the military?” I was running a few steps behind at the moment. If she had been in the military then that might explain a few things about her, like the way she stood, spoke and approached my panic attack.
“Yep, you should see her in her dress uniform, very colorful. Lots of medals. She is also one of the older members here. Sarah is awesome. But back to what’s important…the spa? Relaxing?” Meredith did look worried. That made me a touch worried as well. Why in the hell had I gotten a panic attack? It made no sense. I guess I was just going to relax, like I was being told. Maybe I could figure this out.
“Sure. The tub and a massage sound good to you?” Well, they certainly couldn’t hurt. Besides I had enjoyed the last massage I had gotten from them.
I nodded as I slowly got to my feet. She picked up the phone and made the call. I went to my panty drawer and pulled out what I was going to need.
I put on my vagina while she was still chattering. She turned and let me know that she had managed to grab the last spot of the day. That would be nice. She had asked for three spots. Who would be joining us?
The answer came when Meredith called Rebecca. I guess that made sense. Their conversation lasted a while as I just lay on the bed, listening to my MP3 player. I drifted away to Dave Matthews. It was nice, relaxing and didn’t involve this whole gender insanity. Where Are You Going really did hit hard this time, as did the Dave Matthews/ tim Reynolds version of Eh Heh.
I felt a hand on my knee. I opened my eyes and looked up at Merri. I stopped the player and pulled out the ear buds. She leaned down and kissed me on the forehead. “Come on sweetie, time to go.”
We made it to the spa in fairly good time. Merri was driving a bit more subdued than normal, which was a bit odd. Maybe she was worried about me? I can’t imagine why?
Becca was inside, reading some sort of magazine. I wasn’t able to make out what it was as when she saw me she dropped it and gave me a hug. I hugged her back. We stood there for a while, just holding each other. It felt nice.
When she let go the hug she held me at arms length. “Are you okay?”
I shrugged. At this point I had no clue. A panic attack from nowhere and if that wasn’t what a heart attack felt like then I really wanted to avoid one of those.
She smiled slightly, almost nervously. “Sorry for the joke.”
I smiled back. “It wasn’t your joke that did this.”
“You sure?” she asked, hoping for absolution.
“Well, no, but it really wasn’t that bad of a joke. I can see the humor better the farther I am from it. By next Thursday it will be really funny.” I grinned at her. It wasn’t her fault that I fell for that. I always seemed to fall for things like that from her. She pulled those so infrequently that I had forgotten about the last time when she got me again.
We finally made our way to the hot tub. It wasn’t the first time I had seen Becca naked, and definitely not the first time I had seen Meredith naked, but I noticed that she had filled out some and looked curvier, healthier than she had the last time. It was a nice sight. In fact, both of them were lovely and it wasn’t a bad view either way you looked. I lay my head back and let the warm water unknot everything. I was hoping the pressure in the gaff would fade soon.
“So, what set this off?” asked Becca after a bit. Her face was wet from the tub and sweat.
“I’m not sure. I was worried about seeing my Mom, your folks and that I might be recognized in town.” I shrugged my shoulders. That basically covered things.
Merri grinned, predatorily. “I am willing to bet you that no one will recognize you, outside of your Mom and Becca’s folks.”
I looked at her a moment, wondering if I was really dumb enough to take her up on that. I shook my head. “I’ve been warned about betting with you.”
She pouted briefly and said, “Well…you know…”
I knew where she was going. Part of me didn’t agree but a whole lot of me couldn’t argue with her. I did the only responsible thing at that point, I conceded.
“Besides, with the two of us there we can certainly keep you out of any trouble. Hell, if people ask, you are a girlfriend from college and not my dearest friend Richard. The folks are fine with things. They love you for you and are mostly amused by this recent change in attire.” added Becca.
“I know, but that doesn’t make me any less scared or worried.” The two girls moved through the swirling bubbling water and hugged me. I liked that, especially the naked flesh on naked flesh thing. Made me feel closer to them somehow. It was friendly and loving instead of erotic. Well…it was until I thought about it.
“Don’t worry Richard. I won’t let anyone mess with my girlfriend.” With that Merri kissed me on the cheek.
Becca laughed as I blushed. I giggled as well, as calling me Richard and then girlfriend was funny. True, but funny. Meredith stuck her tongue out at us and then joined in on the laughing.
This felt good. To be here, in this place, relaxing, with two people so dear to me, was wonderful. It was so clear that they cared for me. I hoped they knew how much they meant to me.
The massage afterwards was wonderful. I hadn’t been aware that the muscles of my back had been so incredibly tight. The kneading of my back hurt a lot, but afterwards I felt renewed. It was a great massage, just like last time.
Dinner was comfort food and desert was one of those awesome chocolate chocolate chip muffins. I slathered the warm muffin with butter and washed it down with some cold milk. I lay back in my chair to sigh in contentment.
We separated, to go home and pack. We were going to head out in the morning after a quick breakfast at our favorite place. I was still wrung out some and so Merri finished our packing, making sure I did nothing but sit back and read.
I worked through the book, enjoying the continuing adventures of Rhapsody. I was still in the first third of the second book of the series. Man, that Rhapsody was such a cool character. That whole Namer thing was incredible.
We called it an early night, snuggling together under the sheets. It was nice to feel her against me, and that helped me drift off to sleep.
Shortly after we got up, Sarah showed back up, looking fresh and awake despite the early hour. She had her med bag and was dressed for running. She listened to my heart, checked my pulse and blood pressure. She sighed and nodded. “You should be good to go. No doing anything stupid and Merri, I am still holding you responsible. If you have any other symptoms, right to an ER.”
I thanked her and gave her a hug. She hugged back. Man she was strong. She carried one of the bags down stairs, left her aid kit in the kitchen and then took of for a run while we loaded the car. Once that was done, along with a travel cooler with drinks and snacks, we took off to pick up Becca.
Breakfast was great and the drive was nice. We were in my Jetta, as it was a great car for a road trip. We sang along to various songs and chatted about everything. Sooner than I would have thought possible, we pulled off the Interstate and began to move down familiar roads.
I knew this place and I was coming back as a girl. I guess both Becca and Merri noticed me tensing up. Becca, who was driving at that point, rested her hand on my thigh and Merri kneaded the muscles of my neck. She whispered, “It’ll be okay. Just relax.”
That helped. The drive through town was a bit nerve wracking. A few people waved at Becca, which got my heart racing a bit. I chided myself. How could anyone know who I was? I was just another girl to them, someone that Becca knew. Surely I couldn’t be Richard? That would be absurd.
We wound our way through a neighborhood until we were driving up to Becca’s house. The two-story Tudor was nice and huge. Her parents had done a good bit of investing, invention and work for a few companies. Luck had helped them get early IBM, Apple and Mircosoft stocks. So they were doing quite well.
We parked and headed up to the kitchen entrance. Oh my God! My second parents were in there waiting for us. Merri took my hand and I took a deep breath. I let it out slowly and opened the door.
Comments
Heather O'Malley, Yoiur Three Musketeers Here
Are most definitely way cool. Thank you for introducing Sarah to us. I assume that with her being a Sorority House member that she is in upon the secret. If not, will be interesting to see what happens if she finds out.
I can see where the chapters are going where Becca, Caitlin, and Meredeth are visiting Richard's family. Will be interesting to see if I guess right or if you indeed surprise us.
I have come to look forward to reading your series and wonder if and when you will continue with your Harry Potter story "The Chalice And The Wand?"
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
Interesting way to handle the attaci.
And, I'd almost be willing to have an attack - to be treated like that afterward! :-)
Next episode should be gooder (is that a word?) This one was fun... Next should be challenging.
Annette
Personally, I would love
Personally, I would love treatment like that after a panic attack. I do enough to Richard/ Caitlin without making them suffer all the time.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Another good read
I have liked this series (both College Girl and Sorority Boy) since it started; no force or domination (well, maybe a _little_ of the latter). Hard to say what will happen next, but half the fun is waiting for the next episode to come out. It appears Caitlin/Richard is more than a bit confused; some of it is 'who am I' and 'what am I', with a good chunk of 'I hope Mom and Dad don't kill me for looking like this'.
Thanks for continuing to write this- it's either unique or there are next to none like it. The other stories similar to it are all forced, a difference sufficient that this story may indeed be unique.
Thank you again.
KR
I was glad to read that
I was glad to read that Sarah was an Army medic and EMT. She would be very qualified to make an initial determination regarding Caitlin. I was also happy to see her recommending a trip to the ER if further issues arise as this shows Sarah's expertise.
Getting Caitlin 'de-stressed' will go a long way to making her okay again. Once her trip home is completed, Caitlin should be able to really settle down and begin to realise and understand that she is in fact Caitlin and not Richard. What I don't understand is why either Becca or Merri continue to use Richard at times when speaking to Caitlin. This alone would seem to re-enforce the problem Caitlin is struggling with regarding her identity crisis. Excellent story line and I look forward to reading more of Caitlin's adventures in 'The House' and as a college Coed. Janice Lynn
I've know a number of medics
I've know a number of medics who took this career path. I figured that someone with her background could make this call fairly comfortably. When I had my first Panic Attack...it was very much like what I wrote and the EMT's said very similar things to Sarah.
As for the Richard/ Caitlin thing...they are still trying to figure out who is real, just like he/ she is. The Identity Crisis effects everyone.
Thanks,
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
this story's making me a nervous wreck!
I'm hoping Caitlin's visit home goes well. As nice as the massage & relaxing day at the spa was, I don't think the panic attack problem has been entirely solved. And they seem to happen at the most inconvenient times
(Why do I always have them out in public where everybody's LOOKING at me?!). I have a feeling suddenly
coming face to face with people Richard knew in high school is going to be very unsettling for Caitlin...
I suspect you know exactly what you're doing with calling the story SORORITY BOY and having friends refer to your character by his male name, Heather. You're not going to let us relax into some pleasant feminization fantasy where Caitling is gung-ho for girlhood from the get-go, but are intentionally maintaining the level
of ambivalence about your character's gender identity. You big meanie! Great story, great characters,
and as I've said before great writing. I anxiously await further installments...
~~~hugs, Laika
"Government will only recognize 2 genders, male + female,
as assigned at birth-" (In his own words:)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1lugbpMKDU
In dealing with the whole
In dealing with the whole gender identity thing...this has been going on for a bit over a month at this point, with Richard/ Caitlin unsure the entire time exactly where he/she stands on the issue. Even knowing that this was my real path it took me quite a while to come to grips with it, going over the same ground over and over. Why should I make this journey reflect anything else but the truth? This isn't an easy road and Richard/ Caitlin isn't sure what he/ she really feels about this. Ambivalence is very much status quo for many of us....all the way through. I just want this to reflect real life, real trials, real pain and real joy. We have lots of fantasy...I just wanted to make a story that was real, true and engaging.
Besides...I'm mean... :)
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Liar !
I sincerely doubt you are a meanie. But yeah, there is always that dark doubt that out of no where surprises you, even for a person who had transitioned almost 18 years ago. Ya, see, we all know there are easier alternatives, that is until you are REALLY sure.
But in the dark of the night once in a while doubt does creep in.
Kim
One of my goals through this
One of my goals through this story is to talk about things we don't talk about...the doubts, the feeling that even though you are the girl you wanted to be, this is not who you are. There are no easy answers and I wanted to make that easy to see. I also wanted to make sure no one is perfect and that they all have flaws and preconceptions of the way things should be.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
I love this story
What a great story, I'm new to this site, I've just read College Girl & the published chapters of Sorority Boy, I'm loving it. Can't wait for the next chapter, keep it up Heather xxx
KevSkegRed, Skeg Vegas, England, UK.
to PoetHeather
and I love that complexity you've put into Richard/Cait's charactor. Tho no one likely seen it. I made a comment about such in one of the latter chapters of College Girl and nearly said same in much more verbose stmt. (smiles)
The forrest we wander around in called life has many paths, some of us follow very simular ones, yet every one is slightly different for the experiences and consequences of our actions. Richard seems to be one of the LATE BLOOMERS in more ways than one. AND, It appears he'll have to solve his gender idenity, but sexual pref. along the way. Poor Guy, his body even rebels his origional preference. I know that tragedy all too well, but my horror story is compounded by parents & DR that were determined to make me a boy whether I liked it or not. They still lost in the end, not only the son, but daughter they could of had also.
ANYRATE - love the story... keep writing - I'll keep reading even if I'm a couple years behind everyone else, and my comments lie in dust, sooner or later someone else will see this after me & point to my comment ... & think what silly comments I made long after. (smiles)
I'll just think, well I'm just as old as my old dinosaured IBM MAINFRAME so I'm blonde & let it go at that (smiles)
To Housmous01 ---> I Understand
"but my horror story is compounded by parents & DR that were determined to make me a boy whether I liked it or not. They still lost in the end, not only the son, but daughter they could of had also."
I can relate to this quite well, as I went through all kinds of hell for many years, beginning several months after I was adopted.
I'm not going to go into any detail here, so I sent you a private message.
This is a great story, thank you for writing it, Heather.