“Sorry,” I said resuming my examination of her tongue and chest. Keen to move my examination on my hand drifted to her lower regions, and began to slip up her thigh towards the promised land. Just as thing’s were getting really interesting the peace was shattered.

It was Gordy: “Right, lads, put down who you’re doing and gather round. Lesley’s got a plan to fix Professor Prick for good.”

By Karin Roberts

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It’s been a nice day–not too hot with a light breeze–as I recline back on a Lilo, a glass of white wine in one hand and a long white menthol cigarette in the other. I watch as the sun glints on the water in the swimming pool. The water gently, lapping against the side of the pool. My mind drifted back to just around 15 years ago when thing’s were not as good as this and life was so different. Let me tell you about it…

At that time my name was Craig Adams; I was born in 1971 in a small town just under 10 miles from Glasgow. In my years at Primary school I was very much a loner and I struggled to make friends. Around the time I was due to start secondary school my mother discovered that my dad was having an affair with a woman at his work. They split up and divorced soon afterwards. With all this change going on I decided to implement changes to my own life.

I resolved to become more outgoing and get some friends into my life.

By the time I had started second year I had a growing band of friends, some may have called us a gang. We hung around the leisure centre, the shopping arcade and the local cinema. Gradually our high spirited behaviour became a bit more serious. We became involved in small gang fights, and some minor shoplifting. I was glad I now had so many people that I could call friends, but was a little disturbed by our new pursuits. As you do in situations like this you go along with the group, not wishing to be seen as a softie and lose my new-found friends, I became involved in the small scuffles, all the while being careful that I was one of the last into the fray. When a fight broke out I picked my target carefully trying to ensure that I got to one of the weaker members of the opposing group first, thus keeping my end up in the group and minimising any injury to myself. When the shoplifting was going on, I made sure I was one of the lookouts and was never the actual thief.

As we became a bit older our interests changed, suddenly girls and alcohol were the flavour of the day. We would meet up in a wooded area with as local dialect would have it a “carry-oot” and drink and smoke ourselves into oblivion. Each person pairing off and “lumbering” any available female. For those not from these parts, this was local dialect for kissing and feeling each other up, and basically trying to get your partner to go as far as you could. It was during one of those sessions that my life was about to take a surprising turn!

One night in early summer we were all gathered around a small fire, the cigarettes being passed around and the alcohol flowing freely. The toughest guy of our group and self-imposed leader was a guy called Gordon or Gordy for short. Anyway this night his particular girlfriend Lesley was missing.

“Where is the bitch?” he growled, as the drink began to take affect and his mood started to become a bit irritated. “If she does not turn up soon, one of those other hotties will be facing the force of the Gordy boy tonight and she can go fuck herself,” he announced as he glanced over at the four or five girls sitting drinking in the shadow of one of the trees.

About 15 minutes later Lesley burst into the clearing in a clearly angry mood. “Where the fuck have you been?” snapped Gordy. “That little weasel Professor Prick got me a punishment exercise today from Mrs Kerr the English master. The prick kicked over my bag in English, and what do you know out popped my ciggies and a couple of condoms. After a lecture on the danger of smoking and pre-marital sex she gave me the exercise and threatened that if it was not handed in tomorrow, then she would see to it that my course work was failed in Health and Beauty.” Now if there was one thing that came close to Gordy in Lesley’s life it was her desire to be a Beautician.

“I’ll rip his balls off,” Gordy bellowed. “No, I want him out of the school. I don’t know how yet, but this time he’s history.”

Professor Prick, as Lesley had mentioned, was the quiet guy at school, you know the type–the class swot–the geek, the intelligent guy we all love to hate and make fun off. Like the others, I had given him my share of grief but with some reluctance. In him I could see myself at Primary school, the loner, the outsider, the victim of children’s cruelty. So although I had taken part in some of the pranks and abuse dished out to him, I did so with a certain degree of sympathy–I knew what it felt like. By this time the fuss over Lesley’s arrival had calmed down and she and Gordy were fast trying to make up for lost time. I joined the other guys and girls further over the clearing. Keen to make my night worthwhile I started chatting up a girl called Tracey, she was not the best looker in the group but I was only interested in how far she went.

As the others paired of we also parted and sat at one side of the clearing snogging each other if our life depended upon it. My hand drifted towards her breasts and rather roughly began to fondle them.

“Careful; don’t be so rough,” she said as I prodded at her.

“Sorry,” I said resuming my examination of her tongue and chest. Keen to move my examination on my hand drifted to her lower regions, and began to slip up her thigh towards the promised land. Just as thing’s were getting really interesting the peace was shattered.

It was Gordy: “Right, lads, put down who you’re doing and gather round. Lesley’s got a plan to fix Professor Prick for good.”

For the next few minutes Lesley outlined her plan to the stunned group. At the end she said, “Ideas anyone?”

The group exchanged glances before Dave spoke; “It’ll never work. Where are we going to find a guy who’s willing to dress up and try to be the Prick’s girlfriend?”

“There must be someone who owes us a favour,” Lesley replied.

“What about wee Brian? He owes you a favour, Gordy, for sorting out those two guys for him,” said Andy,

“Don’t be a dick, Andy, he’s way too fat, the idea is to get The Professor to fancy her. Nobody could ever fancy Brian.”

“Even if we do find someone, how exactly is that going to get him kicked out of school?” asked Angela.

Lesley explained; “Well, we get them alone, Professor Prick’s got a dose of the horn and takes the hottie into into a bedroom. One thing leads to another, the guy gets his skirt up exposing his dick we burst in take photo’s then leak them all over the school. There’s no way he can come back after that. Just think of the embarrassment.”

“But what about the guy in the pictures? Won’t he be in the same position?” I asked.

“Don’t be daft, Craig, it’s only his dick that will be in the pictures. If I showed you a picture of some guy’s piece from school would you know whose it was?” replied Lesley.

“It might work,” said Angela, “but we’ll need to get someone quite quickly it’s only 7 weeks till the end of term.”

“That’s right, it’s perfect timing because if we time it right, it will even screw up his exams and he won’t be able to take them; so no University for him.” Lesley laughed.

“Now, get your thinking caps on, gang,” said Gordy.

With the announcement over we returned to the business of the evening. I was still keen to see how far I could get with Tracey and thought the best place to restart was where I left off, my hand slipping up her thigh that bit higher. Her own hands were doing there own wandering and she was now massaging a fairly large bulge in my shorts, with her other hand running up and down my back. Just as it was getting really interesting and her hand snaked inside my shorts, the effects of the alcohol from the evening kicked in, and I had this overwhelming urge to pee. Not willing to take the risk of filling her hand with warm piss, I explained that I needed to take a leak and went of to the other side of the clearing behind some bushes.

Once relieved, I started to walk back to Tracey, just as I stepped into the clearing a voice piped up, “Craig, just stop there, don’t move; just stand there.” It was Lesley. “Morag, put Dave down and come over here.” she shouted. “Now, Craig, just do what you did a minute ago,” she asked.

“What?”

“The way you pushed your hair back.” In those days my hair was a bit long. To give you an idea, if you can remember the boy band Hansen, then my hair was very similar in style. With both hands I pulled my hair back from my ears and let it flop back down just as I had when I came into the clearing.

“You’ve got a point, Lesley, with his teeshirt over his shorts it looks a bit like a short dress and the hair could be worked on. Hey, guys, I think we just found ourselves a girl for the Prick!”

“Oh no , no way, I’m a guy’s guy, you’re not getting me in to this.”

Just at that point Andy stood up and announced, “I think we better can this for the minute; there’s a couple of cops coming along the path.” Sure enough further down the path a couple of local constables were walking towards us. “Dave, throw that bag of empties behind those bushes and let’s get moving.”

Dave took the bag and ditched it behind the bushes. I rejoined Tracey and putting my arm around her waist we all headed off towards the cops. They passed us without any hassle as we walked back towards town. It was getting late so we split up to take each of the girls home.

As we parted, Gordy turned towards me and said, “We’ll talk tomorrow, Craigy boy.”

I walked Tracey home in silence and after a brief snog on the doorstep I headed off home. “See you tomorrow,” she called as I went down the path.

“Eh yeah,” I answered, but in all honesty my mind was very preoccupied with what tomorrow just might bring.

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To Be Continued...