The sky was blue. Yes, just blue, not a cloud to be seen. Every so often a light sliver jet could be seen, trailing white smoke behind it. The sun hung over the city like a warm light bulb, belting its warm rays unto the necks of people within the hustle and bustle of the packed streets. People wore shorts, t-shirts, sunglasses and sun cream, making the most of the rarely seen good weather. The sounds of construction workers banging and drilling combined with angry drivers who were sitting in traffic honking their horns and roaring at the drivers in front of them swelled up like a frustrated bubble about to burst.

But away from all the hectic city life and noise, two people walked alone through the deep lush trees of the park. Charlie and Julie walked alongside each other immersed in one another’s presence. Every time that Charlie moved close to her she would move away with a tight lipped smile as though everything were okay.

Her auburn red hair hung down over her shoulders like two beautiful maroon curtains. She had a slight scent of strawberries and summer breeze despite the fact it was just March. She wore a navy and white striped tank top tucked into a pair of high waisted sailor shorts with thin black tights and slip on shoes. Her eyes were covered by large black sunglasses.

Charlie was not absorbed in her clothing, but he was in her, as a person and as a young woman. It had been three weeks since he last cross-dressed and he didn’t miss it in the slightest bit. His mind was constantly on Julie and not on the next time he’d get to wear a skirt.

As corny as Charlie might have found it, he lay down on the cool green grass with Julie, staring up at the deep blue sky. They talked about many things such death and what they wanted to do when they left school. Very morbid indeed but they both agreed that being buried seemed too claustrophobic and Charlie didn’t want to be cremated after he had read that the intense heat boils fluids in the skull until your head explodes.

What a strange yet insightful topic to discuss but they quickly changed the subject to warm silence. They stared up at the bright blue sky in silence for a few minutes, just enjoying the peaceful sounds of birds chirping and water running.

Julie hummed with happiness as a slight smile spread across her face. Charlie looked over to her, feeling his insides ache with desire. He could feel his eyes water and his mouth dry up as he stared at what he believed to be a vision of beauty. He wished that he could tell her how he felt but she was much too difficult to read at times because she sometimes showed affection towards him yet at other times she just acted like a friend. She was within his very heart tormenting him and she didn’t even realise it.

He opened his mouth to express himself but no words came out. He closed it quickly before she looked over at him. She didn’t notice. He suddenly felt very stuffy and wanted to get up. He could feel the pulse in the side of his neck pounding. However he remained lying down next to Julie.

He looked at the space between them. At least one other person could fit between them. He stared at her petite hand, long nailed and painted with purple polish. He wanted to clench it within his own but he didn’t have the courage. He wondered why he wasn’t acting because everybody at school was telling him how much Julie liked him. But he made the mistake of listening to fellow students once before about another girl who ‘’liked’’ him. Yet she didn’t. And he ended up making a fool of himself. He figured that that incident probably affected his overall confidence with girls but no, he felt something else but he didn’t know what.

‘’How do you feel about leaving school next year?’’ asked Julie randomly.

‘’I can’t bloody wait much longer,’’ stated Charlie truthfully.

‘’Why can’t you wait?’’

‘’I just want to get out of school. There was a time when I could tolerate it but now — now that I’m just so close to the end and I want to leave more than ever,’’ said Charlie earnestly.

‘’But the Leaving Exams get in the way?’’ said Julie persisting Charlie’s feelings.

‘’Yeah but the sooner they come, the sooner they are over and done with,’’ stated Charlie.

‘’Why do you want to leave so much?’’ inquired Julie.

Charlie turned his head to Julie who was looking at him. The brightness of the sun clashing with the green blades of grass made her look angelic.

‘’I just told you,’’ laughed Charlie.

‘’You told me how much you wanted to leave, now why you wanted to,’’ smiled Julie.

Every time she smiled at him so did he. She made a fair point and it made him think, ‘’why DO I want to leave so badly?’’.

She didn’t press the matter any further as she knew she couldn’t decipher what he really meant, neither did Charlie actually.

They walked together side by side through the park talking about future plans. At times Charlie didn’t listen as he was distracted by her sweet hypnotic voice. To him, she could say anything and it would sound beautiful. They ventured through a tunnel beneath a stone bridge and emerged from the darkness at the other end.

‘’Do you think you’ll stay in contact with your friends?’’ asked Julie sweetly. ‘’Be honest now!’’

‘’I dunno, maybe. It’s hard to know,’’ said Charlie truthfully. ‘’We’re all going to different college’s next year.’’

Julie looked down at her feet coyly as her gentle smile was replaced with a look of nerve.

‘’D-Do you think you’ll stay in contact with me?’’ she asked shyly.

Charlie looked at her and noticed her head hanging low. He wanted to hug her but he felt it would be too seamy. He had hugged her many times before but only as greetings.

‘’Of course Julie,’’ he said, stating her name clearly. ‘’How could I NOT keep in contact with you?’’

She gave another tight lipped smile and looked down at her feet. Her hand twitched as if she wanted to reach out and clutch onto Charlie’s but he didn’t notice. He was too busy with his head turned the opposite direction, feeling the cold stab of awkwardness. His eyes were drawn to a little sand bank by the small lake in the centre of the park. Somebody had engraved the words ‘’I LOVE YOU’’ into the sand and he thought that was really beautiful.

Just under a half hour later the two sat together in a small corner café down Shop Street, a cobbled alleyway of expensive shops and restaurants in the centre of the city. The café was filled with people reading books with a cup of coffee, mostly college students. Charlie had never been there before but Julie claimed she went there all the time.

‘’I can’t wait to go out tonight,’’ stated Julie whilst she held her warm cup between her two hands. ‘’It’s been much too long since I went out and got properly hammered!’’ she laughed.

Charlie winced as she said this. He had no idea that Julie was the type who would drink. After all she was only sixteen, two whole years away from being able to do it legally. Frankly, he was a little shocked but at the same time he didn’t care. There were way too many aspects of Julie that he admired to account for a small matter of underage drinking. He did it himself, sometimes.

‘’Yeah same,’’ said Charlie.

Mostly everyone in his school year was going out because there was a big eighteenth birthday on. He wasn’t invited to the house party before hand, nor was Julie because they didn’t know the guy. However they were going to the pub, followed by the nightclub.

How he was going to get in was beyond him. He was only sixteen. Would he be able to even pass for eighteen? But Julie claimed that they were going to a certain place that always let underage in. Charlie was unsure. He wished that he could just spend the night with Julie, just the both of them so he could finally express his feelings to her. He felt positive that he should tell her that night but he was only fooling himself. He kept putting it off further and further.

‘’What do you think is your most attractive feature?’’ asked Julie randomly.

‘’What?’’ said Charlie, put off by the sudden question. ‘’I uh — Jesus — I dunno? What do you think?’’

‘’Is your most attractive feature?’’ said Julie, bowing her head slightly whilst smiling coyly. ‘’You’ve got good skin.’’

‘’Skin?’’ chuckled Charlie.

‘’Yeah it’s really clear yet rugged,’’ laughed Julie. ‘’It’s really nice!’’

They both laughed for a moment before falling into silence. They stared at one another. Charlie usually found it hard to look into her eyes but this time he found himself lost in lush green forests of her eyes. Her thick lashes and light liner really brought out her vibrant, expressive yet sad eyes. He knew what was coming next so before she could even say anything he interjected.

‘’You’re eyes are so beautiful,’’ he said hypnotically.

She did not look away. It seemed to be that it was just them in the world, no one else.

‘’Thanks Charlie,’’ she said softly.

They didn’t kiss.

***

‘’When are you gonna fuck her brains out?’’ asked Sean casually.

Charlie just shook his head at his friend’s crude sense of speech and didn’t answer.

‘’Now if I were you now I would have rode her long ago!’’ stated Sean.

He jumped up on the couch and began to thrust himself into a pillow which he placed in front of his genitals. Charlie gave him the dirtiest look ever before slapping the pillow out of his hands.

‘’Will you cop on and stop being such a fool!’’ snapped Charlie.

Sean fell back down to the couch with his eyes fixed on Charlie. A look of shock and disbelief dawned upon his face.

‘’Alright lover boy don’t get your knickers in a twist!’’ he said in a high pitched tone.

Charlie looked at Sean from the corner of his eye with cynicism before turning his head back to the television screen. Neither of them said a word a few painful minutes.

‘’We’ve already played this match,’’ stated Charlie.

‘’So? I want to beat you again!’’ said Sean grinning.

Charlie tried to keep himself from smiling back but he couldn’t help it.

‘’So,’’ said Sean, trying to sound casual and conversing. ‘’Julie, she means a lot to you then?’’

Sean and Charlie never talked about their feelings to one another, because well, they didn’t have that kind of friendship. For Charlie, Sean’s question made him feel uneasy and awkward.

‘’Yeah I guess so,’’ said Charlie, not wanting to sound in the least bit love struck.

Sean raised his chin in a somewhat half hearted nod before turning his back to the television. They had been playing a football videogame for the last hour just to past the time. Charlie had departed from Julie right before then. She had to go to her friend’s house to prepare for that night. Charlie got the bus out from the city and dropped by Sean’s on the way home.

It wasn’t long before Charlie stood up and went for the door. He had to get home and get ready himself.

‘’I’ll see you later man,’’ said Charlie.

‘’Seeya,’’ said Sean.

As he stepped outside he felt the warm breeze blow against his skin. He was dressed in knee length beach shorts, runners, no socks and a dark green slim t-shirt. He walked down the footpath, feeling the heat between his toes. The reflection of the sun made him put on his sunglasses and the glare of the passing cars was almost blinding to the eye.

He loved it when the weather was this good.

Within a few minutes he was walking through the garden gate and opening his front door. It was much colder inside the hall. He walked into the kitchen to see his mother drinking a glass of red wine. He stopped dead in his tracks as if a weight fell into his heart. She had his back turned to him and she was gulping it down as if it were water.

‘’Mom?’’ he called softly.

She suddenly shook as if she were prodded with something electric. She turned around and half attempted to cover the bottle.

‘’Oh hello Charlie!’’ she smiled crookedly. ‘’I didn’t expect you to be home so early!’’

Charlie didn’t say anything. He tried to act as normal as possible as he walked to the fridge. This gave Mary enough time to ‘hide’ her wine. As Charlie stared into the fridge blankly an overpowering dread overcame him.

Has she started drinking again? Charlie thought.

‘’What do you want for dinner?’’ asked Mary casually as If everything was fine.

It took a moment for Charlie to answer back as he was stuck in a never-ending trance.

‘’Anything at all,’’ he said softly.

His eyes bulged with water as he walked up the stairs. He shook his mind free of emotion and swallowed hard. He tried to forget what he had seen. He didn’t want to say anything to his mother in case it would cause her great embarrassment or another breakdown. He walked into his bedroom and wondered why he went upstairs in the first place. He then figured that he had to get away from the shock in the kitchen.

‘’How about Lasagne?’’ called Mary from the kitchen.

‘’Yeah that’s fine!’’ Charlie shouted back.

‘’What are you doing Mom?’’ he muttered angrily through gritted teeth.

Half an hour later he sat downstairs at the kitchen table with his mother. They ate in complete silence. As he neared cleaning his plate, Charlie started to talk.

‘’Where’s Rachel?’’ he asked his mother.

‘’Oh,’’ smiled Mary. ‘’She’s off with that boyfriend of hers. You know the one with the car?’’

‘’Dave,’’ said Charlie. ‘’His name is Dave O’Donnell.’’

Mary gave a half-hearted nod before digging into the rest of her lasagne.

‘’Aren’t you going out tonight?’’ said Mary as she raised a roast potato to her mouth.

‘’Yeah, I’m afraid I’ll need a bit of money if that’s okay?’’ asked Charlie, not looking at his mother.

She replied only with silence. Charlie looked up to see his mother give a weary sigh.

‘’You see this is why I think you need to get a job,’’ she said. ‘’So you can pay for yourself. You’re going to have to start someday Charlie.’’

‘’But I don’t have time for a job!’’ stated Charlie.

Mary sat back in her seat and stared at her son, shaking her head with her arms crossed.

‘’Just tonight,’’ she said simply. ‘’After that you’re not getting another penny!’’

‘’Fine,’’ mumbled Charlie. ‘’Thanks.’’

Later that evening Charlie was upstairs getting ready to go out. He dressed himself in black jeans, converse and a tight long sleeved t-shirt. His brown hair was getting quite long. He could hear his mother’s voice nagging him at the back of his mind. ‘’If your hair keeps growing at this rate I soon won’t be able to tell you and Rachel apart!’’. He scoffed to his reflection as he sprayed deodorant over his body. To think that he was dressed up like his sister in his mother’s closet a few weeks made him laugh and cringe at the same time.

What was I thinking? He thought. What was the point?

He had a nervous feeling in his stomach. He couldn’t tell whether it was nerves or excitement. He felt nervous because he knew he had to tell Julie how he felt about her that night and excited because it had been a long time since he was last out on the town. He hoped that everybody was right about the nightclub because he didn’t fancy being turned down by the doormen due to his young age. But he trusted Julie’s instincts and he was a little confident that he would get in without I.D.

He went down the stairs, feeling a little queasy and he walked into the sitting room where his mother sat reading a book.

‘’I’m heading off now Mom,’’ he said.

‘’Be careful!’’ she warned. ‘’Because if you aren’t there’ll be war!’’

She handed him some cash with her lips pursed. She always made that face when she handed some money over to Charlie. He smiled and said ‘’Thanks!’’ before turning for the door.

‘’Oh and Charlie,’’ called Mary.

‘’Try and not to get into trouble with that Sean boy, I don’t trust him,’’ she said sternly.

Charlie nodded and closed the front door behind him. The evening air was cool yet warm and the sky was painted with blues, pinks and oranges as the sunny day transcended into dusk. He noticed that Dave’s car had suddenly pulled up outside the house with Rachel in the passenger seat. Charlie stopped halfway down the front path and looked at the car.

Rachel and Dave were fighting.

Their inaudible speech was muffled under the loud roars and screaming. Rachel looked furious as she was using her hands a lot. She always did that when she was angry. Dave just sat stiff and shouted at her like an angry gorilla. She got out of the car and slammed the door as hard as she could.

Charlie’s eyes widened as she was dressed in the same outfit he had tried on a few weeks ago, the high waisted skirt, the vest, the tights, the blazer and even the heeled ankle boots. What a coincidence because she must have only worn the outfit once before.

She opened the gate and strutted up the front path barely noticing her brother who was right in front of her. Her eyes were red raw and puffy from crying. Charlie’s heart ached for his sister.

‘’Rachel what happened?’’ he asked.

‘’Buzz off Charlie!’’ she sobbed.

And then the front door slammed. He looked at the door and then at the garden gate. He didn’t have much time to go inside and tend to his sister. He had to get going and Rachel didn’t seem to be in the talking mood anyway. What did Dave do to her?

***

Later that night Charlie, Sean and Joseph strutted down the dark street towards the nightclub. Charlie’s phone vibrated in his jeans. He scrambled for his pocket and whipped out his phone to see he had a text message from Julie.

‘’Where are you? x ‘’

He began tapping frantically at the keys.

‘’I’ll be at the club in 5 mins…’’

He hesitated for a moment and added an x to the end of the message. He suddenly felt really corny and seamy but everybody apparently did it. He hoped it didn’t seem too much.

‘’Stop looking at your fucking phone,’’ snapped Sean. ‘’We’re here!’’

Charlie looked up to see a dank looking neon sign reading ‘’The Valk’’ hanging over double steel padded doors. Two large bouncers dressed in all leather stood outside smoking. There was no line. The street was empty. Only muffled techno music could be heard. Suddenly Charlie felt scared. He was miles away from his sub urban home at that moment. If he didn’t get in he didn’t know what he’d do. Inside Julie waited for him. He was beginning to have doubts but he slapped his conscience to be a man.

‘’Right are we ready to do this boys?’’ said Sean in a deep voice, clapping his hands together.

‘’Yeah bring on the girls!’’ growled Joseph.

Charlie didn’t say anything as they crossed the road and approached the bouncers. Sean tried to casually walk by but he was stopped by an arm. A fat beefy man dressed in heavy leather clothes stepped out in front of him.

‘’Can I see your I.D.?’’ he asked.

‘’Awwwh shit!’’ cursed Sean. ‘’I left it at home!’’

The bouncer looked at the other large man and shook his head. They got this all the time.

‘’Alright then when’s your date of birth?’’ he asked Sean.

Charlie knew he didn’t stand a chance of getting in now. His night was ruined. His chances with Julie were thrown out the window and he was stuck in the city. He only wished that he could have had some drink before he left to gain a bit of confidence.

‘’Uh — um,’’ stuttered Sean. ‘’2nd of February 1983?’’

The bouncer stared at him with his eyebrows raised.

‘’So you’re twenty nine?’’ he said.

‘’Yeah, that’s it,’’ smiled Sean.

Charlie wanted to punch Sean so hard right now that he had to restrain himself from doing so. Twenty nine, seriously?! The bouncer cursed under his breath before leaning in close to Sean’s face. His breath smelled horrible and his unshaven face reeked of dirtiness.

‘’I’ll let you in on one condition, that you don’t drink and you’re out of here by 2.a.m,’’ he grunted. ‘’Do I make myself clear?’’

Sean nodded frantically. He looked as if he were about to wet himself. He was frozen stiff until Joseph nudged him ahead. He went inside the club and paid the ticket lady. Joseph had his brothers I.D. so he got in with no difficulty. That just left Charlie. The bouncer eyed him as if he was staring directly into his soul.

He didn’t say a thing to him.

Charlie gave a sigh of relief as he entered the club. As he stepped inside the hall he was hugely disappointed. There was barely anybody in the place. The red carpet looked at least thirty years out of date and the walls were already dripping with condensation. It was too hot the music playing was terrible. There was a slight scent of bubble bath and metal. He could understand why they let underage in. They were really, really desperate for the business.

‘’What a complete shit hole!’’ Joseph exclaimed.

‘’Who cares! We got in!’’ beamed Sean.

For once Charlie thought Sean had a point. They got into a nightclub underage without much effort. But his mind quickly turned back to Julie. He looked around the empty dance floor and over towards the couches but she was nowhere to be seen. Then out of nowhere somebody called his name.

‘’Charlie!’’ beamed Julie.

‘’Hey there!’’ smiled Charlie.

The two embraced one another in a tight hug. He didn’t want to let go. The smell of her hair made him feel woozy and even a little drunk. They broke apart. She looked stunning. She was wearing a short tight black skirt that was way above the knee. It was high waisted with a white ruffled blouse tucked inside. She wore transparent tights underneath and a pair of black pumps. Her gorgeous red hair was shiny, smooth and draped beautifully over her shoulders.

‘’Come on let’s get a drink!’’ she said, gesturing Charlie towards the bar.

One drink turned into two and then two turned into too many and within the space of under two hours Charlie and Julie were beyond tipsy. Charlie didn’t even notice how full the nightclub got. The place was jumping and he could have sworn that the music had gotten much louder. The dance floor was wedged with sweaty people dancing, dry humping and kissing. Almost everyone was underage.

Charlie had never really gotten properly drunk until now and it made him feel invincible, confident and brave. The more he looked into Julie’s eyes the more he was lost within her girlish nature, her eyes, her lips and her laugh. They had to spend most of the time shouting into one another’s ears over the loud music.

‘’Are you trying to get me drunk Charlie Smith?’’ laughed Julie.

‘’No, no, no!’’ insisted Charlie. ‘’Why would I want to do that?’’

Truthfully, he wasn’t. He was just being a gentleman. Now he was hoping that his insinuating question would invite Julie in.

‘’I dunno Charlie,’’ shouted Julie, her eyes sparkling. ‘’Why would you?’’

She wasn’t making it very easy for him and nerves began to emerge through the fogginess of the alcohol.

‘’Just to be nice I guess,’’ said Charlie.

Inside he was beating himself up. You stupid moron! He thought. Julie put down her glass and began to giggle.

‘’Come on, let’s go dance!’’ she smiled.

‘’What?’’ shouted Charlie, unable to hear her properly.

She moved in closer to his ear and shouted, ‘’DO YOU WANT TO GO DANCE?’’. She didn’t wait for a reply and she took him by the arm out onto the dance floor. By the arm.

‘’I thought I told you before Julie,’’ said Charlie. ‘’I hate dancing. The music moves me but it moves me ugly!’’

‘’Oh stop it!’’ laughed Julie.

Again, Charlie was trashing his conscience. Moves me ugly? Come on! He thought.

After a few minutes of cringe worthy dancing on Charlie’s behalf the two got separated within the large dancing crowd. Charlie had no idea how he could have lost her. Did she walk away on him? Did he? He couldn’t think straight. His mind was so foggy and he couldn’t even stand straight without swaying from side to side like a tower of plates.

He left the dance floor and regrouped with Sean and Joseph who were sitting on the couches with about eight other people from the school year. Charlie let himself fall onto the couch next to Joseph. He felt as if he could stay there forever. Apparently excessive alcohol made him feel incredibly dazed and tired.

‘’Did you bang your girlfriend yet?’’ asked Joseph.

‘’Joe, I’ve told you a million times before, she is not my girlfriend!’’ stated Charlie, his eyes shut tight.

‘’Aww you two are sooo cute together!’’ said Charlotte, a blonde haired girl sitting across from Charlie.

He loathed that word. Cute. He and Julie weren’t cute. They weren’t even an item in the first place. He pretended he didn’t hear the comment over the music.

‘’Did you though?’’ asked Joseph.

‘’No I did not bang her!’’ stated Charlie, opening his eyes at last.

He was still beating himself up for being such a coward about it all. He knew Julie had wanted to get with him, why couldn’t he just do it? He has had so many opportunities but he has chickened out of every one and he hated himself for that. He reckoned he needed more confidence. Yes, that’s what he needed.

He went to the bar and ordered himself another pint of cider. He bought drinks for his friends and sat around the table for the next while playing drinking games. He didn’t feel the transition between soberness and drunkenness until he went to the toilet. He stood on the cubicle with his hands on his head. His head was swimming and suddenly he felt as if he could do anything. A distant voice at the back of his head told him not to do anything hasty or stupid.

‘’I’m going to go out there and I’m going to tell Julie how I feel!’’ he mumbled to himself.

He then left the bathrooms to go look for Julie. The loud music and talking drained out his hearing and once again as he got back into the zone. His glassy bloodshot eyes trailed from side to side as he went up to the next level of the club, searching for the pretty red headed girl. Many friends and acquaintances from school greeted him as if they were his best friends. Many people he never even talked to randomly came up and gave him a friendly drunken hug. He just smiled all of these people away and continued to search for Julie.

He walked around the bar and the couch area before he seen something horrifying in the distance, Julie atop of another boys lap, kissing and cuddling him in an overly sexual manner.

There was once a time when Charlie was a young boy who loved to climb trees. One day when he was in the back garden of his old house he fell off from a tall pine tree in the corner of the garden and he hit the ground hard on his back. Every breath was sucked out from his lungs and he couldn’t catch his breath for at least five to ten seconds.

That’s exactly how he felt at that moment as he stared at Julie with the other boy. He felt a vicious lump form in his throat as hurtful rage spread across his face. Julie’s tongue was lurched down the boy’s mouth with her arms draped tightly around his shoulders as he slipped his hand up her skirt. They didn’t look like they were about to break apart any time soon.

Charlie had to look away. He couldn’t deal with the image so he went back downstairs, walking fast through the heavy crowds with his fists clenched. He needed to get out of there right now before he did something nasty. He hadn’t blinked since he saw them and as soon as he stepped outside into the chilled air he felt something powerful overcome him.

Hateful anger hurt and pain. He didn’t cry. He didn’t weep. He just walked down the dark street feeling the cold night breeze clear his foggy mind. Each time he blinked it burned his eyes like acid. He felt drained of all energy as his muscles began to feel like rusty hinges. It was 3.a.m.

‘’Julie, Julie, Julie...’’ he chanted. ‘’Why?’’

A car filled with drunk lads from the year above him sped by. They all stuck there heads out of the window and jeered at Charlie. He barely took notice of them. He did not want to call a taxi and he did not want to stay at any of his friend’s house. He wanted to be at home.

Charlie walked away from the nightclub feeling the cold stab of jealousy. He felt that he would somehow never be the same person again.

He walked through the many districts right into the early hours of the morning. He walked alongside the motorway which was already beginning to fill with cars as the dark sky began to get a little brighter. A tint of sunshine began to show on the horizon line before the large boiling sun began to rise.

Charlie’s muscles felt weak, feeble and disjointed. He didn’t know if he was either still drunk or sober at that point. He didn’t care.

He reached his suburban housing estate at the stroke of twelve past six in the morning. He crept through his front door and took off his shoes. He slowly walked upstairs and went to his room where he passed out on his undressed bed.

The thump of the car door made Charlie open his eyes. The sound of a second door slamming made him lift his sore head slightly. He listened carefully. The ignition jerked several times before the engine started up. He was as still as a statue as he listened to the low rumble of the car reversing out of the driveway. His could barely open his eyes as yellow crust shut them closed. His head thumped painfully as his stomach rumbled with discomfort.

He slipped out of the bed and wiped the sleep away from his eyes. For a moment he felt fine but then he remembered what had happened last night. He felt his heart ache as he walked to the window and parted the curtain. He could see his mother hatchback minivan driving away down the street.

It was 11:34.a.m.

He turned and left his room. He undressed from the clothes which he wore and slept in for the night. He felt dirty, sticky and extremely lousy. He stepped out into the cool corridor in only his boxer shorts.

‘’Why Julie?’’ he mumbled sadly. ‘’Why did you do it?’’

He could feel himself choking back tears. Tears. He hadn’t cried since he was a small boy. He sniffed it back and restrained himself from doing so. He hopped in the shower. The sensation of the warm water cleansing his body and mind was incredible. When he got out, wrapped a towel around his waist and went to his room to get dressed he felt much, much better.

As he dried his hair with the towel he heard his phone vibrate in the jeans which were crumpled on the floor. He swallowed hard as he took his phone from the pocket. He had over a dozen missed calls and texts from his friends wondering where he was. Charlie looked at the most recent text which he had just received.

1 new message from Julie.

He raised his eyebrows and scoffed. What was in the text? What had she to say? Was it to say sorry? He opened the message and read.

‘’Hey where did you go last night? I was so worried about you!’’

Charlie’s arm flung forward at the wall and within a second his phone was smashed into tiny pieces. He breathed through his nose like a fiery dragon as his face boiled red. His arms were shaking. It was as if somebody else had just controlled his body and he was just the passenger.

He had never felt such terrible fury inside him.