This is what Alex borrowed from his sister’s room to wear when he went to meet with her. This was the best way to illustrate his problem, he thought.

Alex had dug himself a deep hole. He could no longer navigate without a plan. A plan would be beyond his ability to craft. He had to enlist help.

Revised and edited. Rights reserved by author. Permission granted to Big Closet.

~o~O~o~

Alex darted into his room just before seven A.M. with a bundle secreted under his arm. The package he pilfered from his sister’s trunk contained the contents of the outfit he would wear when he meets his sister. ‘I guess I am not exactly sneaking this as I will show it to Jami’, he rationalized. He spread the items on his bed to examine and then folded them into his overnight bag. He viewed the mocha chocolate knit skirt with a suppleness presenting a feeling ever so sensual to him. It fit a conservative length falling just above his knee. The silky camisole style peach colored top with narrow straps both scared and excited him. He did not know if it was silk or not. It felt like silk to him. He secured a simple cotton bra with front clasps that did not enhance his attributes. If one can call a feature you don’t want an attribute. Others certainly see them as assets. He had also included a half slip that he wore under the skirt which did not show hiding any panty line. He tried on each item then nearly passed out when he looked into the mirror. The boy was terrified.

Mother could be heard calling from downstairs “it is almost seven thirty I have to go.” Alex grabbed his bag having just finished throwing on a tee, shorts and those pink striped sneakers. He suddenly appeared before his mother, “I’m ready.”

The long drive began with Gladys issuing the parental instructions in rapid fire succession. Poor Alex barely had time to respond as mother prattled. “You did not forget the package for Jami? What about directions, do you have a change of clothes and clean underwear?”

Alex giggled to himself, ‘oh yes I have clean underwear. Nice soft nylon briefs.’

Mother went on, “you have your license? You will obey the speed limit, tell Jami I love her and call when you get there.”

The boy nodded as he dropped his mother at work. She kissed his cheek upon exiting the car. Alex breathed deeply sucking up his courage and drove toward the throughway. Two hours later he reached the last rest stop before the exit to the college. Inside a stall in the ladies room he changed into his sister’s clothes. The cramped space caused him to bang his elbows more than once. If anyone noticed, nothing was said. He finally emerged looking like a pretty teen girl. His whole presentation changed and Alex knew he must become more aware than he normally had when he presented as Alexander.

More than a few heads turned as he walked toward his car. He could feel the eyes upon him as he experienced a new kind of fear. The boy had always been cautious using guarded actions because of the non stop abuse he suffered in his old school. But this was eerily different as he felt the sensual brush of his skirt and the warm air caressing his legs. He liked the feeling and the confidence generated by his obvious good looks. He had this feeling of foreboding familiar to people who looked like him. Alex breathed a sigh of relief as he sat on the seat, swung his legs inside as he had seen girls do a hundred times. He locked the door and buckled his seat belt. Alex focused on that next exit dreading his soon to be confrontation with his sister.

At about ten twenty he walked from the car toward a bench where he could see his sister. She was wearing jeans and a cami top not too different than the one he was wearing. Alex spoke on the phone while walking advising his mother he reached the school safely.

Jami sat on the bench with legs crossed looking at her watch. ‘Where is he? Typical, twenty minutes late. Oh well ten more minutes and he is s.o.l. I’m so out of here.’ She looks up to see a girl walking toward her about fifty yards away. The girl is talking on a cell phone in her right hand while the left presses a small package against her hip. Jami does double take thinking, ‘she is wearing an outfit just like one I have. It looks real good on her.’

Alex nears the bench where Jami sits. He has broken the connection with mother. He had to set the package down to place the phone in his purse. It only takes a moment to reach the bench; he smiles and sits next to his sister. “Hi Jami.”

The girl’s eyes open wider than any anime character‘s. Speechless for an eternal moment she speaks just as Alex’s expression turns sour. “What are you doing? Are you nuts?” She points to his breasts, “you glued those on or are they pads? What the hell are you doing wearing my clothes!”

Alex offers a hurtful look, his eyes fixed upon his shocked sister. “Your clothes because I need to illustrate my plight. Not nuts, desperate, Not glue, not pads, real. They are really me.”

Jami picks up the package from the bench. She stands taking Alex’s hand, “where are you parked?”

Alex points across the expansive lawns, “over there.” Jami starts walking with Alex toward the parking lot.
“I live in an apartment a few blocks from here. I will drive.” Jami says as they reach the vehicle.

Sheepishly Alex questions, “are you mad at me?” Jami shakes her head, “no just shocked beyond reason. I can’t wait to hear the story. I have to admit you are beautiful.” Alex blushed, Jami nods thinking, ‘it’s a girl alright.’

Jami sits on the edge of the sofa looking at her brother with awe. “First take off that top. I need to see this.” Alex blushes not enthusiastic about what Jami commands. “Sport I can’t help unless I see what you are talking about.” Alex blushes again but complies.

The girl stares at her brother’s 32A set of mammary growths. “J effen Christ,” she stalls, to avoid adding to her outburst considering her Fundamentalist brainwashed brother’s upbringing.

Alex sheepishly says, “Sis I’ve said worse than that.” They both laugh as Jami feels both of them. “Do they hurt?” Alex shakes his head giggling, “no to the contrary it feels good keep it up.” Jami lets go quickly barking, “I don’t swing that way bro. Cover yourself up and tell me all about it. Leave nothing out.”

The boy weaved his tale of woe highlighting how he had only a slightly puffy chest in the spring. Then by late July, these appeared. He tells of his parent’s reaction to Dr. Grant’s prescribed treatment and how prayer is the course of action.

Jami response is an outburst with a loud, “bastards.” Alex flinches as she continues. “What are you going to do? You can’t hide them.” She squeezes his hand, “you can’t strap them down more problems will develop that way. You really don’t want to go there.” She tries to minimize and lighten the situation by adding. “You are a heart breaker and you know it don’t you?”

Alex flinches nodding. “I’ve noticed and so have others.”

Jami narrows her brows, “others, what haven’t you told me? Out with it all Alexandra.” Emphasizing the feminine version of his name.

He slowly reports about Kathy, Regan, Jake, Jen, and the school secretary, exemption from gym, the letter and the school schedule. He included his parents know nothing about this. Alex sighed, “They all think I’m a girl.

Pacing back and forth Jami smiles, “so you can go to school as a girl. The captain of the football team has the hots for you. His ex is going to hate you and you already have two girls who are best friends. Christ! how I miss high school.” She added the latter with a taste of sarcasm. “It is not going to work you know. When they figure it out you’re dead.”

Alex sits back on the sofa smoothing his skirt. “I know but what in hell can I do? I can have them amputated in January.”

Jami watches her brother sit, ‘he has that down pat.’ she observes. Jami tells Alex to walk around the room for a moment while she thinks. He does so and she observes, ‘he walks like a girl. We might be able to pull this off.’ “Problem,” she begins. Alex blinks repeating, “problem?’

The girl nods, “you can’t have them amputated and expect no one will notice after four months of boys drooling over them. Even if you fake cancer going for the pity party route. They will still think you are a girl. Your transcripts will say girl. Did you think about that? Besides having an amputation does not address the underlying cause. In other words brother the reason you have tits.”

Nearly in a panic poor Alex can’t respond before Jami continues. “Then there is the football player. They have a tendency to get what they want. It is called entitlement. The girl friend will be worse. There is nothing like an angry queen bee. We need a course of action brother.”

Alex, mostly numb sits silently. “You came to the right place and you are in good hands Alexandra. But first you have to tell me do you want to do the girl thing or not?’ Jami gazes at Alex awaiting an answer.

“You know me sis, passive resistant. They all think I am a girl. Keep my mouth shut with a low profile and let it blow over.” Alex explained how he views it.

“Brother that will only work if you are willing to service Jake from your knees and somehow neutralize Jen.”

“No way!” exclaims Alex.

Jami smiles, “I take it you lust after girls not boys.” Alex shakes his head “I had not thought about it.”

With widened eyes, Jami says, “my sister is not a lesbian. Are you gay?” Alex claims he does not know he is just not interested all that much in sex. Jami considers this a moment before explaining, the breasts, the hormone levels, his absent sex drive. “Alex you have a problem deeper than what we know. Hold on help is not far away.” She opens her cell, “Rose can you come down here? There is a problem with my brother.”

Rose Brooks steps inside as Jami opened the door. She looks at Alex, “your brother? What is the joke?”

Jami quickly explains and Rose tries to take it all in to process the information. With a gentle voice Rose explains she is a Resident at the nearby hospital. “Do you mind if I examine you.”

Alex hesitantly answers, “I don’t mind but I brought the doctor’s report to convince Jami I was not pulling her chain.” Rose reads the report then offers, “it does not answer all the questions but it is a good start.” She leads Alex into the bedroom instructing him to strip. After examining his breast she smiles. “They are healthy did they tell you they appear to be able to produce milk?’ Alex blinks horrified, “no!”

Rose examines his genitals taking his organ into her hand. Alex blushes as she massages it to its full two inches. She shakes her head mumbling “this will be virtually worthless. Your sacks are tiny, too tiny.” She instructs Alex to dress.

Back in the living room Rose measures Alex with her eyes trying to read him. The expression Alex presents is of deep concern. Gently Rose offers, “you are a very pretty girl Alex. My guess is being a girl is your best option. Your parents though for the wrong reasons may have taken the correct route.”
Alex considers with a raised brow. “Wrong reasons, you are saying God is a wrong reason?” Rose shakes her head, “I am not anti God. But don’t you think God gave doctors the ability to help people and doctors are part of his plan?”

Alex shocked at the concept thought about it for a minute. He could think of no argument against that logic and answered, “perhaps.”

Rose continued. “If the doctor started you on the estrogen blockers the breasts would not have grown as they have. But we need more information considering, down there. I doubt those sacks could produce the testosterone levels required. I need to take some blood and run some test. Can you come over to the hospital Tuesday?”

Alex shakes his head. “I have to go home tomorrow and school starts mid week.” Jami closed the door as she entered the room. Her leaving went unnoticed. “Yes he will be there at 8 am Rose. I convinced mom and dad to let him stay until Tuesday.” Alex blinks.

Jami smiles winking at her brother, “sis you may help yourself to my clothes I mean since dad dragged the trunks across the state you keep them. You will need them as Dad sure as hell won’t be paying for skirts.” The other two laughed.

Rose cautioned, “we don’t know where this may lead. Alex may be suited to be a boy after all.”
“I doubt it look at her,” said Jami. Rose opened the door offering her goodbye. “I will see you Tuesday.”

Jami crawled onto the couch next to her new sister. “Here is how we deal with Jen.” She looks to Alex giggling, “I’ve known a lot of Jen’s.” Alex perks listening to his sister’s devious plan. Jami concluded the explanation of her idea finishing with, “we are going to conduct a makeup lesson then go to lunch. I have to get you an emergency pack.”

Alex’s sister calls someone she does not name. Hearing only one side of the conversation Alex blushes as his sister speaks. “Yes the fully functional vagina you guys came up with for your porn flicks.” She closes her phone and turning to Alex she quips, “you’ll see. Now go hide in the bedroom. I don‘t want this guy to see you.”

A few minutes later Alex sitting on the bed sees Jami enter. She is carrying a small box. “Strip!” she commands. In her hand is a fake vagina. She applies some liquid to the back then strokes her brother. Shocked! He shouts, “what are you doing?” Jami says simply, “I need it hard. Damn Rose was right this thing can’t do any damage.” The boy emits silent tears. Jami hugs him, “I am sorry I did not mean to hurt your feelings.” Still sniveling he murmurs, “I know.”

Jami slides the implement over his tiny shaft pressing it to his groin. “There now you look like me.” Alex stares in amazement. “Uh ok er now what?” Jami giggles, “now you can get screwed. They tell me in the production department those porn movie guys can’t tell it from the real thing. Ain’t technology wonderful? Making you hard allows room for expansion without the painful compression they felt in the old days. Oh yeah you have to sit to pee.”

Alex blinks as Jami reveals the rest of the kit. “Glue, tampons, just what you need to convince them no means no.” A red liquid she holds up, “do I have to tell you? It adds a touch of realism to sell the tampons.” She giggles. I’ve also included some mascara, lip stick and cologne. You can’t wear that thing for more than twelve hours without any issues. But use it sparingly. It will fool anybody. Oh Alex try not to fall in love. You really need to graduate a virgin. Consider who you can hurt.” She kisses her brother. “You are pretty.”

Early Tuesday morning the test blood was drawn and Rose told Alex, “call me tonight. I should have some answers for you I hope.” Alex takes her card promises to call and leaves with his sister.

Back at Jami’s apartment she tells her brother. “You better go home wearing your boy clothes. By the way I love your hair. Thanks for introducing my sister.” She kisses him and embraces Alex in a crushing hug. Alex stunned at what happened during the visit he dreaded responded, “I love you sis.” Jami pushed him out the door.

On the way home Alex called Kathy to glean all the information he could about Jen. He learned she worked part time at the village library. It was just what he needed to put Jami’s plan in action. His parents were waiting in the driveway when he pulled in. They pumped him with hundreds of questions and acted pleased when he reported how close he and his sister had become.

Alex picked up his camera and went over to the library with the excuse of something for school. He located Jen and quietly snapped her picture, several of them actually. He managed to get out of the library unnoticed by Jen and went directly to his room.

After speaking with Rose he sat to consider what the Doctor learned. It was not the final word and more information was needed before any decisions could be made. But it looked like girlhood was in the cards. Alex felt relieved everyone thought he was a girl and he could avoid the torment boys in dresses face in the school halls. He knew he was walking a fine line. He also knew people saw what they wanted to see based on their expectations. Alex needs to avoid changing perceptions. Alex mused about the implication of his testosterone levels dropping and estrogen levels rising. “These things are going to grow and when Dr. Grant runs his tests after Christmas it will be my decision. I just hope they don’t grow too much.”

He fired up Jen’s pictures on his computer selecting one to work with. He begins with an eleven by fourteen art paper and an assortment of inks. The focus is on her long sandy blond hair that falls to her behind. It is straight and silky. Alex smiles thinking, ’I am glad to have taken years of art classes, I can do this.’ He studies her deep oval green eyes that literally gleam sparkling like pools. Her heart shaped face with perfect skin. Alex blinks, ’I’m falling in love.’

Some time later interrupted by dinner Alex completes his project. He looks at the sketch admiring it. ’I must say it is good. Not an Earth shattering Van Gogh but passable.’ He slipped it into his sketch pad and crawled into bed wondering what tomorrow would bring.

The first day of school Alex anguished over wanting to wear that red and green plaid skirt and white blouse of Jami’s. He knew better slipped on a pair of jeans with his tampon loaded vagina and nylon briefs. He pulled on a beefy tee and yes he was wearing a bra. His small chest was barely noticeable to his parents hidden behind his sketch book and untucked tee. He tucked in the shirt on exit of the car to enhance his breasts. Waved goodbye to his mother and walked into the unknown. Tomorrow he would be walking the few blocks to school as they lived within the obligatory one mile line.

Alex was met at the door by Kathy and Reagan. The three walked in side by side. Right at the start Jen walked toward them fire in her eyes. She murmured a hello, “Kat, Rea who’s your friend?” The two girls knew it was about to hit the fan but Alex shocked them. “Hi I’m Alex and I know who you are.” Alex said excitedly.

Taken back, Jen paused a bit off her ire, “and?” It was all she could say. Alex pounced. “We have second period study hall together. I have something I must show you.”

The situation diffused Jen who simply nodded, “ok second period.” Her confused expression almost caused the other girls to break out into fits of hysteria. As Jen walked down the hall with her deliberate I am the queen and the queen rules sway Kathy dragged Alex into the girl’s room followed by Reagan.

“Ok spit it out what are you up to?” Kathy demanded while Reagan watched anxiously. Alex opened her, (her as in she presents this way in school), sketch book revealing the portrait. Both girls eye’s open astonished. “Wow you did that,” they said in unison. Alex nods, “I thought I’d kill her with kindness.” The girls laughed. “Please kill me” both said. Alex returned, “give me a picture you like.”

The fire remained as Jen walked into study hall she consciously made an effort to sit next to Alex. Jen was ready to pounce on her prey. Another girl had to change her seat to accommodate the queen. Every girl knew better than tangle with Jen. “This better be good,” Jen threatened as she glared at Alex.

Alex simply said, “I saw you in the library and was overcome with inspiration.” Before a stunned Jen could respond Alex opened her sketch book revealing the portrait. “For you I did it yesterday. I hope you like it.” Jen starred speechless as the likeness was stunning it captured her beauty. “You will need to get a frame I did not have time to find one. It would have to be selected with care to accent the picture. You know to do it justice.”

Finally Jen speaks, “why? Do you know who I am?” Alex shakes her head, “a girl I saw in the library. Why?” Jen looks at Alex taking the portrait carefully as if it would bite her. “Thanks this is lovely. But I have to warn you.” Alex blinks. Jen continues, “I was pissed when I found out about you.”

Alex narrows her eyes, “me why?” Jen for the first time smiles, “Jake, he was my boyfriend and he likes you.” Alex comes back, “I had nothing to do with that. I only met him once.” Jen laughs, “did he throw a football at you?” Alex nods. Jen says “first the football then the charm. We broke up because he wanted more than I wanted to give. He called me names and threatened to tell everyone I gave good head.”

Alex narrows her eyes. Jen continues, “somebody told me he had been cheating with another girl. They said a new girl in town. You are the only new girl. I told all my friends to stay away from him and I would deal with you.” Alex nodded, “I only saw him once.”

Jen comments, “I believe you considering the way Jake can be.” She glances at the picture, “there is passion in that drawing.” Jen suddenly smiles, “do you like girls?” Alex widens her eyes “I never thought about that.” Jen gazes at Alex tossing her hair, “either have I.” They ended their conversation, “if I ever think about girls, I’ll let you know.” She leans closer whispering, “I don’t give head. The idea of putting that sweaty thing in my mouth is gross.” Jen laughs, Alex nods, trying to picture the act agreeing with Jen. “Oh” Alex begins, “about letting me know if you think of girl’s in that way, take your time because I don’t think that way either.” Jen laughs, “good I was worried for a minute.”

Through the first four periods it was unsettling and difficult to get used to hearing each teacher refer to Alex as Miss or Ms. Alex noticed other students reaction to the presumed her. Every so often a male student would steal a glance while the girls seemed to appraise. It made it easier that Reagan or Kathy were in each of the classes. In two both were in the class. Even Jen appeared friendly but that could be a ruse. The teachers were light on instruction the first morning as each class started with a getting to know you and this is what we will be doing flavor.

Alex stopped at his locker thinking ‘it is hard to think of myself as a she.’ He spun the dial opening the door and shoved his new books into his day pack. Three classes already assigned homework and Alex blew a breath of air upward into his chestnut bangs thinking, ‘demanding my entire night.’ A sound emanated from behind his left shoulder. “Hey!” Alex turned to see Jake with a big smile. “I just wanted to welcome you to Valley Tech.”

Alex issuing a blank expression, “is that what you call this asylum?” Jake nodded with a cool move of his head putting his extended arm behind Alex’s back and against the locker next to Alex’s. The pose appeared to Alex to be akin to the male leader of the pack staking his claim. Just then a softer voice sounded followed by a pushing away of Jake’s arm. “Down boy,” said Reagan. “You are blocking the entry to my treasure cave.”

The football player stepped back with a cheerful, “yes Ma’am.”

“Go pester Jen and leave the newbie alone. Let her find out how sleazy you are some other time.” Reagan replies.” With a laugh, Jake bows, “yes my Lady.” He looks to Alex, “later.”

Reagan turns Alex by pulling on her shoulder as the girl was watching Jake walk down the hall. Alex thought, ‘wow he is smooth and hot‘ Alex tried to purge that sinful and perverted thought when Reagan saved him. “I know he has a nice ass. The problem is he is all ass and wants yours. I hear you gave the drawing to Jen already.” Alex nods, “she liked it.”

The girl with hair just like Alex’s smiled, “Jen is showing all her friends. Be careful or you will be spending all your time with the easel.” Alex laughed as they joined Kathy in the Cafeteria. The three sat at a table for six and began to eat. Jen and her entourage walked by aiming for their table the new senior elites inherited. Alex watched this thinking, ‘just like the last school everyone in their place according to the pecking order.’
Kathy spoke up, ‘there they go.” An unnamed girl walking in tow with the queen bee smiled at Alex, “great picture.” The rest smiled, Jen waved and they went on to their corner. Reagan giggled, “score one for the new kid.”

Just as Reagan asked Alex, “what is your next class we,” pointing to Kathy she finished, “have gym.” A boy about five foot ten or eleven with dark blond hair stood before them holding his food tray appearing lost. A male voice from the jock’s table directed toward the boy was heard, “move along dweeb those ladies are out of your league.” The kid balked starting to turn.

Alex froze having heard this kind of intimidation over and over again. She measured the kid who stood there motionless as the Jocks went on with snide almost unheard remarks. He wore a blue oxford shirt with khaki pressed pants right out of the sixties preppy private school movies. He was fairly good looking, ‘cute’, Alex thought. “Are you going to sit down or what? You are blocking the view.” Alex said almost absently. Kathy and Reagan laughed as the boy sat leaving an empty seat between him and the girls. “I’m Brian,” he said.

The girls nodded as Alex said to Reagan, “you were saying about gym?” The girl flushes glancing toward Brian then back to Alex. “So while Kathy and I are sweating working up a gross foul odor. Ruining our perfect hair you will be doing what because you have bad tits?” Brian blinked as he began coughing trying to avoid spraying his mouthful all over the girls. His thought was as he stole a glance of Alex, ‘they don’t look bad to me.’

Alex flushed while Reagan began to apologize profusely realizing how hurtful that was. Alex remained cool understanding the girls had no idea what his problem was. The comment was blown off and Alex suddenly remembered this was nothing a girl would talk about in front a boy. “Will you stop kidding around, it is not my,” with a pause while darting those blue pools in Brian’s direction, Reagan picked up the hint. “Sorry”, the girl began, “I know that.” Turning to Brian she adds, “it is a private joke but we had you going.”

Brian demonstrated relief as he relaxes having gained control of his spasm. “They look fine to me.” The girls starred at him. One of those you are dead stares.

Kathy instantly chirps in, “so what are you stuck with?” Alex, in a low voice answers, “Home Economics.” The girls laugh. “With Barcomb?” they chime in unison while Brian adds, “me too.” All three girls turn to face him with a knowing smile.

‘Sewing?’ Alex thinks as he hears Ms. Barcomb instruct the class there will be a sewing project assigned to be completed by end of term. She passes out a stack of patterns one to each student explaining this is random. Each student will have something different. She then did a roll call asking what the student was assigned and writes it down in her note book. “No switching,” she warns.

Alex noted he received a simple pair of slacks and breathed a sigh of relief when he heard the teacher say, “each one of you will wear your product to class the day of completion. She scanned her book and smiled as she spoke. “Mr. Patten you may change with,” she examines her book scanning, “Miss Winslow.” It would not do to make a boy wear a skirt to school.” Brian blushed as Alex cringed.

The three girls walked home together with Brian tagging along like a lost puppy. Kathy pokes Brian, “you got out of wearing a skirt huh? I bet your legs are better than Alex’s.” Brian blushed while Alex said, “I don’t wear skirts any more than Brian does. What’s with sewing in an Economics class anyway?”

Regan pats Alex’s shoulder, “duh did you miss the Home part? Economics is for the accountant class not the little lady who manages the home front. This is to train you for domestic life where you carry Brian’s offspring on your hip while juggling dinner plates.” Alex blinked, Kathy laughed and Brian blushed.

One by one as they walked down Maple Street each of the teens dropped off going into their homes saying, “call you later.” Finally only Alex and Brian remained. “Thanks for what you did,” Brian said as he turns up his walk. Alex could see his house two lots further down. “We live this close and I never saw you before?” Brian shrugged, “I’ve seen you. Can I call you?” “Sure” responded Alex and without a thought, “stop by sometime.” Brian’s eyes widen thinking, ‘did I hear that right? A total babe is saying stop by sometime.’ He almost danced as he skipped onto his porch. With a dream like expression he waved, “c ya.”

It was then Alex realized what he did or was it what she did? “I am going nuts trying to keep this straight. A girl to everybody else and a boy in my mind.” no one heard his audible musing. Once inside the house he was greeted by mother. “Alex how was your first day at school? Everything went well I hope?” Her voice would have been described at best as hopeful. Hopeful that he at least did not get beat up or tormented.

Alex had been half way up the stairs when he stopped to listen to his mother. Mr. Winslow was still at work. He considered now was as good a time as any. Though putting this off as long as possible would have been his preference. “Mom I got a problem can we talk?”

Taken back Mrs. Winslow narrowed her brows, ‘the boy never admits to a problem this must be bad.’ She guides him to the sofa, “what is it?” Gladys had a hard time holding back her laughter when she heard her son had to make a skirt from a pattern. He made her promise not to say anything to his father. Gladys knew Norman would cause a scene over this with the school. She also was aware the point is to teach the art of sewing and won’t hurt her son to learn this skill. But she questioned “why a skirt?”

Alex explained, “it was a random draw of patterns. The teacher allowed Brian to switch his skirt for the only pair of pants pattern available. So I was stuck. The teacher explained that it did not matter as sewing is sewing and the idea is to teach how.” Mother smiled “all girls in the class and two boys?” Alex nodded, “it is no big deal and it is better than gym.”

She agreed to allow him use of her sewing machine and would help him pick out the materials and give him tips. ‘But why was Brian allowed pants and not my son?’ She said to Alex, “I will call the school to complain the other boy got preferential treatment.” Alex screamed no, “It will make me look like a cry baby. I don’t want that kind of attention.” Considering all the trouble the faced at the other school Gladys quickly agreed to let it drop.

Gladys looked at her son with raised brows as he had forgotten to untuck his shirt. “Alex did you go to school like that?” Alex glances down at his obvious breasts, blushes quickly responding. “No I wore the shirt pulled out.” He pulled the shirt tails out from under his belt allowing it to blouse over him. His chest appeared flat. He finished, “I tucked it in on my way inside, why?” His mother smiles, “I was just curious.” Gladys believed her son because she knew he did not want to attract attention. She did not notice the sway of his hips as he climbed the stairs.

Alex dropped the book bag on the bed nudging it with his hip as he sat legs again tucked under. Kathy answered her phone. “You and Brian seemed to hit it off. Does that mean Jake is out?” she teased. Alex could feel a blush rise before replying, “don’t be silly Kathy. Jake scares the hell out of me, Brian doesn’t.” Kathy agreed “I think Jen was right when she told you how he is. Though I think Jen did what he wanted and she is not about to admit it. Jake dumped her for other conquest. What do you think?”

Alex exhales slowly before agreeing. Kathy devilishly pursues her train of thought. “You know Brian would be good cover. It would keep the others away. Well not completely. You know how territorial those Neanderthals are.” Alex laughs, “I don’t want to use anybody.”

“But girlfriend I can tell you like him. You just gave yourself away.” Kathy waits for a reaction. Alex responds by saying, “Great imagination you have there. Gotta go see you tomorrow.” Alex ends the conversation even more confused than before.

Back at school the cheerleaders are huddled having finished their practice. A tall stunning girl says to Jen, “What about that Alex girl. I thought you were going to put her in her place?” Jen tilts her head, “naw we talked she is not interested in Jake.” The girl widens her eyes regarding Jen. “You talked?” Jen nods, “she is cool I like her.” Jen retrieves the rolled sketch from her hockey bag. “Look at this.” The other girl smiles while she gazes at the portrait. “So tell the other girls the new girl is approved by Jen. Is that right? You aren’t hatching something this is straight?” Jen nods, “there are plenty of dweebs. Besides Alex hangs with two cool girls, Reagan and Kathy. They are not in our group but they are hot chicks.” the other girl smiles, “I will spread the word.” Jill packs up and begins her walk home thinking of how she will deal with Jake. She considers Debbie, ‘a real skank that Jake deserves.’

Alex struggles as he chats online with Regan. Alex concludes being a girl is better as he is not the target he has been all his life. ( he begins to regard himself as she from getting heavy doses of that perspective in school) Alex considers ‘she as he enjoys the attention and the friends he never had before.’ Reagan flashed, “What about Brian?” “Meaning?” responded Alex. There is a long pause before Reagan’s response appeared.

“Alex, Ben Arnold and I are going to the movies Saturday night. Kathy and Jeff Casey are coming as well. Why don’t you and Brian come along?” Upon reading those words Alex considered ‘both Kathy and Reagan are babes. They are both my friends. How come I don’t get all gaga when I hang with them? I’m not gay am I?’ The screen flashes again, “you there?” Alex breaks the trance, “yeah.” With a devilish twist Alex answers, “Duh he hasn’t asked me. You don’t think I am going to ask him?” Kathy types back, “you never know he might. You would say yes won’t you? It’s the new Potter movie.”

Totally confused Alex ponders, ‘he is cute,’ Alex balks upon writing those words on the screen. “C-ya,” appears suddenly as Kathy reports she has to run. Alex shuts down the P.C. and calls his sister. The whole story poured out. Every detail of Alex’s plight since they parted earlier in the week is reported.

Jami could literally hear the tears over the phone. Her heart went out to her conflicted brother. “Let me get this straight everybody thinks you are a girl. The school, your friends,” she pauses. “You have two solid best girl friends who are total babes, a boy who you met today, the head cheerleader actually was won over and the football hero is in lust with you. You have not told anyone, while mom and dad are clueless. Have I got that right?”

Alex confirms what Jami listed. The sister gathers her thoughts asking “how do you think of yourself?” Alex exhales slowly, “A girl that’s how. All day long I am in girl mode. When I get home I pretend to be a boy. Most of the time I hide in my room.”

Jami came back with the question she dreaded to ask. The one Alex refused to face. “Do you want to be a girl?” Alex heard the words as he tried to process the answer. “I think so.” Jami smiled, “you have no idea brother. You are being accepted for the first time and it feels good. Do you think that is it?”

Alex answered, “yes and no. My breast are growing my legs are definitely feminine. My fingers scream girl.” His voice softened, “I even sound like a girl. I don’t think I have a choice. Your question should be are you becoming a girl.” Jami heard this and she had to agree. She could not resist her next sharp comment. “I bet your treatment is helping. Those nightly prayer shots are sure as hell doing the job.”

“That’s not funny Jami.” Alex fires back. “Sorry sis but that is how I feel about this bullshit. You know if you don’t tell your friends the truth you won’t have them. You can’t win by deception. You know that don’t you?” Alex agreed, “what can I do?”

Jami takes command with her answer. “Do you plan to continue as you are?” Alex admits he has no alternative because to advise the school will be certain death. “Then what you are going to have to do is be a girl full time. This switching persona all the time will get you committed.” Alex nearly panics, “what about mom and dad?” Jami laughs, “just throw out your chest and say it is the Lord’s plan.” Alex resisted that idea thinking it akin to suicide. “Then what,” Alex asks.

Her response was not what Alex expected. “I will have Rose set up an appointment with a local OB. Do you know what that is?” Alex nods; Jamie repeats her question not being able to see his gesture. Alex repeats his nod aloud. Jami continues, the doctor will do a complete exam and perhaps refer you to a shrink. This is what Rose said is likely to happen.”

“A shrink,” Alex explodes. “You think I’m nuts?” Jami answers softly, “no sis you are not nuts. You are effed up for sure but you’re not nuts. They can’t make you a girl physically without a shrink’s assessment.” Alex relaxes, “what about mom and dad?” Jami sighs, “they won’t be told anything unless you tell them. Treatment is going fine as far as they are concerned. Just keep praying and you will be a mother before you know it.” She could not resist the last shot though she regretted it at once. “Sorry sis I’m just teasing. Go into my trunk get that silky black night gown and go to bed. You’ll feel better.” Alex thanked his sister. His cell rang again.

“Hello.” A shy voice responded. “Alex this is Brian. Kathy told me you guys were going to the Potter movie Saturday night. Would you like to go with me?” Alex noted the pleading tone in Brian’s voice. With a picture of Brian in mind a thought followed, ‘he is cute.’

Alex answered, “with Reagan, Kathy and their boyfriends?” Brian eagerly agreed. Alex took a deep breath, “on one condition.” “Oh what’s that?” Asked Brian’s excited voice. Alex said, “my parents don’t approve of dating so it is just a group of friends hanging out.” Brian beamed, “no problem. I can do that. Pick you up at seven?” He asked. “I’ll meet you at Kathy’s.” Alex answered. ‘Not here,’ he thought.

The gang of six sat in pairs as they viewed the Potter movie. Alex flushed as Brian’s arm slowly managed to rest behind her neck as he held the popcorn. Alex nervously watched the movie noting the hand holding couples sitting in her row. She whispered to Brian while tracing her eyes upward to draw attention to his arm. “It must be difficult to eat any popcorn in that position.” She giggled watching his reaction. Slowly his arm drifted away and his hand reached into the container. Brian sheepishly risked to accidentally rest his hand on Alex’s knee. She did not seem to object other than to react with a tightening of muscle he could feel. Toward the end of the movie Brian whispered into Alex’s ear. “Do you like the movie?” Alex whispered back, “yes it is fun.”

In the ladies room Kathy and Reagan excitedly peppered questions to Alex. “Do you like him?” They pressed the question because it was the central issue to feed their curiosity. Alex nodded rather unenthusiastically and the girls could see their friend sort of liked him. Kathy says “remember, only a small one time kiss is allowed when he walks you home. Hand holding is fine but nothing more, don’t be a slut.”

Alex laughs at that. “No danger there and kissing! Not.” Once outside the boys suggested pizza.” Reagan and Kathy looked at their watches shaking their heads. “We have to be home by ten.” The guys accepted that and they walked in pairs dispersing as each girl was ushered to their door.

Alone with Brian Alex and the boy reached his front door. Alex was in turmoil having watched the good night kisses both Reagan and Kathy received. That could not be allowed at Alex’s front door. Alex said, “goodnight Brian I enjoyed myself.” Glancing at Brian and his sidewalk leading to the porch Alex added, “I’ll walk you to the door.” The young man turns to face her, “no you won’t I will see you safely home.” Alex never thought that poorly desperate ploy would work. In fact the she in Alex would have been put out if Brian let her get away with it. ‘Brother I am even thinking like a girl.’ Alex thought.

Brian took Alex’s hand turning her toward the house two doors down. Alex thought quickly, “uh no goodnights at my house. Father works for the church and he will freak out.” Brian stops turning Alex around to face him. “I like you Alex can we be friends?” Alex smiles and Brian draws close kissing Alex then steps back. ‘wow she is soft and this feels so good,’ Brian swoons to himself. Alex is surprised as the boy takes his feminine hand squeezing it. Near the front step Brian waves then walks toward his house. Alex smiles at the boy then turns inside.

“Alex how was the movie? You could have had your friend come in what was his name?” Norman calls from the den. Alex pauses at the bottom step answering, “Brian is his name he had to go home. Like you his parents said be home by ten.” Norman steps out of his office walking closer to his son. It is like he does not see the growth of Alex’s breast. “I understand there were two girls and four boys. You were not dating then?” Father’s question confuses Alex, “are you saying I cannot date?”

Norman smiles “does my son have a girl friend?” He appears happy with that idea. Alex struggles a bit answering, “no dad do you think a girl wants to date a guy with breast that competes with hers?” Alex runs up the stairs to the bedroom slamming the door. She falls face first onto the bed head swimming thinking of that kiss.

A few moments later Gladys enters without knocking she is stunned seeing her son wearing a pair of Jami’s black silk pajamas. “Alex!” She gasps, “what are you doing?” Alex steps forward his figure betraying the result of the slow transformation. “This is comfortable and while you and dad are praying the Lord is giving me one hell of a figure.” Gladys raises her voice, “don’t talk to me like that.”

Alex not ready to back down says to the woman. “Mother take a good look at me. It is too late for Dr. Grant’s treatment.” Gladys turns her head away. Alex walks around the woman to face her, “answer the question what do you see?”

Gladys begins to cry “I am so sorry I put faith in the Lord and did not listen to the doctor. Can you forgive me?” Alex shakes her head touching her mother’s shoulder. “Forgive you for what? For the first time I have friends, I am being accepted and my life is improved. School is not a nightmare. Like it or not mother you have a daughter.” Gladys hugs Alex, “your father won’t like this.” Alex interrupts, “I don’t care everybody thinks I am a girl and that is what I am. I like the new me” Gladys blinks, “if that is so then we need to have a long talk.”