Rachel's Complicated Life, Chapter 5

Chapter 5

More Revelations

Gina and Rachel ran to where Becca laid.

“Oh my gosh! Becca! Wake up!” Gina held the prostrate girl in her arms. Rachel ran to Angela who appeared to be in a mild state of shock.

“W-W-What happened?” said a slightly loopy Becca.

“You fainted, honey”

“Oh, I remember now, I thought that Randall was a girl. Crazy, huh”

Angela was looking at Rachel. “Is that you, Randall?”

Rachel was embarrassed beyond her ability to speak. “Y-Y-Yes. I’m soooo sorry I shocked you, Angela. I guess I wasn’t thinking. I guess I’ve got a lot of explaining to do, huh?”

Becca was still a little shaky, when she looked at her friend. “Randall? You scared me half to death!”

Gina helped Becca over to the couch. “What’s going on, Mrs. Harris? Is this a joke?”

Gina looked at Rachel, and they both realized they had made a mistake. “Becca, It’s a long story. Why don’t I get you all something to drink and I’ll let Rachel explain everything”

“Rachel? Who’s that?”

“It’s me, Becca, I used to be Randall, now I’m Rachel”

“I don’t understand.”

For the next hour, Rachel and Gina explained to the girls what had happened, and the facts involved. Angela and Becca slowly began to understand what was going on. They had many questions, most that Rachel and Gina had heard before. They answered the questions the best they could. Finally, the girls had understanding of the change in their friend.

“So you really are a girl, and have been all along?” asked Becca.”¨

“Yes, I have most of the parts every girl has, except I can never have babies. I’ll eventually have to have surgery down there to fix some things that were wrong when I was born”

“Wow, Rachel” said Angela. “How is Garrett with all of this?”

“He’s been so wonderful through it all. He accepts me for who I am”

“Well if Garrett’s ok, then so am I” announced Angela. “Are you happy?”

“Yes I am, totally happy” I feel like I’ve been let loose from a cocoon. Are you ok with me, Becca. I don’t want to lose you as a friend. That’s why I decided to tell you and Angela first”

Becca immediately said “I can’t believe you did this. No, I’m not ok with it! How could you!”

Rachel, started to tear up, and was almost ready to cry, when Becca said “Gotcha! How do you like that, Miss Smarty Pants!”

Rachel didn’t know what to say, other than “I guess I had that coming”

“Yes you did. No more jokes, ok?”

“No more jokes”

Everyone started laughing after that.

Garrett came back from his workout and Gina suggested they go out for Chinese. There was a popular buffet down the road in Killeen, just off the base, where the Harris family went in happier times. They called the Conways, Becca and Angela’s parents, to get permission for the girls to go. They got the all clear to go, and much to Angela’s delight, Garrett was going too.

“Rachel, why don’t you get changed to go. It’s getting a little chilly for shorts”

“Ok, Mom”

Rachel headed upstairs with Becca and Angela close behind. They got to Rachel’s room and began to look through her closet.

“I am totally jealous of you, Rachel. When did you get all these clothes?” asked Becca

“I got them in Austin yesterday after my appointment with my therapist. She gave me the go ahead and Mom and I went a little crazy at the mall”

Angela suddenly declared,“I so have to see you in a skirt or a dress!”

“Ok! That would be cool! I have a few that we can look at”

“What? You don’t care?” asked a shocked Angela

“No....would you care?”

“You really are a girl, aren’t you?”

“Well, yes I am, now that you mention it. I like skirts and dresses, They are way more comfortable than jeans”

They looked at the selection Rachel had and chose a cotton floral print casual dress that was pastel blue with pink flowers. It came to just above her knees. She went into the bathroom to change.

“Why are you going in there? asked Angela. “We’re all girls here”

“I know, Ang, but I’m not comfortable enough in my skin just yet. It feels funny right now being in my bedroom with two girls. I hope you understand for now.”

“Sure, girl, I get it, no problem” said Angela “But hurry up. I’m starving!”

Rachel changed into her dress and picked out a pair of matching sandals. She brushed her hair, freshened her makeup and came back out.

“Oooooohhh, you look fabulous” cried Becca “And you did your own makeup! What were you doing all that time you were pretending to be a boy? Practicing?”

Rachel did a little twirl “Thank you! I just started yesterday, but I practiced quite a bit today. I don’t use much, so it isn’t that hard. Let’s go!”

Rachel grabbed her little bag and put her small makeup case in with some lip gloss. She flounced down the stairs where Gina and Garrett were waiting.

“A dress? You’re wearing a dress?” asked a bewildered Garrett.

“Quiet, Garrett. Your sister looks lovely!” corrected Gina.

“I know....that’s the problem” he chuckled. “I’ll never get any peace with three cute girls with us. Excuse me, four cute girls.

Gina and the girls giggled.

“All right, young man. Flattery will get you nowhere with me. Ohhh, who am I kidding, It’ll get you a hug from this girl!” she said as she hugged her son.

They got on the freeway for the 10 minute drive to the buffet. And as Garrett predicted, a lot of young men’s eyes were directed to the girls. Rachel was a bit unprepared for the scrutiny she got. Boys were looking at her, and not like they did last week. She was only 12, and the looks creeped her out. But she did enjoy the attention from the waiter, she decided. She also decided she liked to wear dresses. They made her feel grown up and totally feminine at the same time.

After eating way too much food, they headed back to town and they decided to drop the girls off at home. It was then that Rachel felt she needed to speak to Mr. and Mrs. Conway personally.

“Mom, I think we should stop in at the Conway’s and explain to them my situation.”

Becca and Angela thought it would be a good idea as well. Gina also agreed.

“I was going to suggest it, but I was hoping you would come up with that idea on your own” said Gina.

They got to the Conway home and everyone got out. As they came up to the front porch, Mr. Conway greeted them.

“Well hello, Gina, Garrett. Who’s this young lady with you?”

“Well Hal”, Gina began, “this is Rachel. Is Mary home”

“Yes she is. Come on in! Mary, Gina Harris is here!”

Mary Conway came in to the front room. She was 35, and spent a lifetime in central Texas.

“Gina? Well come on in, y’all! would y’all like somethin’ to drink? Who is this pretty girl with you. My but she does look familiar”

“No thank you, Mary but I would like to talk to you and Hal for a bit"

“What’s up, Gina, trouble? How can we help”

“Well thanks for the offer Hal, but I really need to talk to you about Rachel”

Rachel and the girls went upstairs as did Garrett, albeit reluctantly.

Gina then related Rachel’s tale to a shocked Mary and Hal Conway.

After Gina was done explaining the situation, Hal spoke up.

“Well, don’t take this the wrong way, but I thought Randall was a girl the first time I laid eyes on him...her...you know. I guess I was right all along”

Mary said “I did too. Randall was always such a sweet boy, I thought, much too nice to be a boy. This is a relief. I am so glad this worked out. No offense, Gina, but I was sometimes horrified at the way Randy treated that poor child”

“None taken, Mary. I was in quite a bit of denial about Randy’s mental condition after he came back from Iraq the first time. I guess if that was what it took to get Rachel, then something good came about from Randy’s sacrifice. I’m afraid of how he would have been after his second tour. I just think that Randy is finally at peace now”

“I can’t help but agree, Gina” added Hal. “I know that Randy had PTSD, but wasn’t seeking help. I was in Desert Storm, and I know that if you don’t get professional help for it, your chances of recovery go down significantly”

“Did you suffer from it, Hal?”

“Nope, I was rear echelon, quartermaster corps. Never saw a minute’s action. Knew boys who did, though. Killing people doesn’t come natural to man no matter what anyone says. If you get used to killing, you become less human. The stress is normal for any normal person. But you can’t be too proud to seek help. The esprit de corps doesn’t help. You’re seen as a section 8 waiting to happen if you see the shrink. It is getting better now, as more soldiers are seeking that help”

“On another note, have you told yours and Randy’s parents about this?”

“Not yet. I’ll do that tomorrow. Mine will be fine. I think Randy’s mother will be fine. I don’t know about the General. He worries me. Randy was a lot like him”

“Well, you defend your children. If Lieutenant General Barton Harris doesn’t like it. Tell him to pound sand. You are the Commander in Chief of the Gina Harris family, and you don’t have to give in to anyone” offered Hal.

“You don’t actually believe that line do you?”

“Nah, but do it anyway. It’ll be his loss if he doesn’t get to know that sweet girl you have”

Upstairs, The girls and Garrett were talking.

“So, are you going to be at school on Monday” asked Becca.

“No, Mom is pulling me out and will start homeschooling me. I can’t face the stress right now, and my therapist agrees”

“Oh....that’s too bad” said a disappointed Becca. “I was hoping to have my new girlfriend with me now”

“It’s just too risky right now. My doctor told me that people who go through what I’m going through are at a greater risk of being beaten up or worse. I can’t face that right now. I would also appreciate it if you could not talk about my situation right now, it will keep unnecessary attention away from me. Doctor Smith said news people like stories like mine for some reason”

“Don’t worry about us, Rachel” said Angela. “We’ll do our best to keep a lid on it”

“Thanks, I really appreciate it”

Gina gathered Garrett and Rachel up and they drove home. It was getting late, and they had church tomorrow. Rachel was dreading that for some reason. She couldn’t figure out why.

Sunday morning broke early for Rachel. She was up at seven and took care of her morning needs, then was in he shower. She loved to take long showers and this morning was no exception. She thought about the changes she had gone through and what more she was going to face. She was broken out of her thoughts by her mother.

“Rachel, get moving, dear. We’re running out of hot water, and Garrett needs to shower too. I’m glad I got up at 6. Goodness!”

Rachel got out of the shower and dried herself off. The soap and shampoo she used had matching lavender fragrance, and she loved that smell. She went into her room and picked out her underwear and a pink training bra. Then she got her church dress, a light pink tiered cotton one with a scoop neck and fairly wide shoulder straps. The length was slightly below mid thigh. A pair of strappy pink sandals completed the look. She styled her hair without too much difficulty, and did her makeup as she had been shown, adding a touch of mascara with the eyeliner, and a little blush.

“Mom, how do I look?”

Gina gave her the once over. “you look wonderful, dear. Great job on the makeup! You are really catching on fast. We’ll have to start experimenting with new looks for you.

“Thanks, Mom”

They were ready to go to the early service by 8:30, and made it to the church 5 minutes before start. Rachel was holding on to her mother’s hand with a death grip.

“Are you ok, honey?”

“Just a little scared, I guess.”

“Well we’ll just go to the service and be out in no time. Thank you for doing this, Rachel. I know you are scared, but this is important for you to get out into the world”

They entered the building, and Rachel felt the stares of several people in the building She saw people who knew who she was, apparently word did get out. Some older folks scowled at her, and whispered to each other. Rachel felt her heart beat faster and she closed her eyes. She wished that Becca was here. She heard someone in the lobby say “There’s that transvestite. What’s he doing here?” She hugged her mother tighter.

Gina, Garrett and Rachel sat in a pew close to the back. Rachel’s head was down, but she could feel the stares of the people close by. She could hear whispers. Her heart beat faster. A few people came up to Gina and Garrett to shake their hands, but no one offered a hand to Rachel. She looked up and saw a couple of older girls looking at her and laughing. Were they laughing at her? She put her head down again, afraid of what she might see. Tears started to run down her face. She was glad she brought tissue in her purse.

The service started, and the song leader started by having everyone sing “What A Friend We Have In Jesus”, followed by several choruses. Rachel stood when people stood, sat when people sat, but heard nothing other than the whispers of people close by. “what is it doing here” “that whole family should be ashamed” “pervert”. The offering was passed, and the sermon was started. The pastor had just gotten started, when Dan Buford, a deacon in the church stood up and said “I’d like to know when we started letting perverts like that little homo Harris boy show up in God’s house dressed like a little whore!”

This was greeted by a chorus of amens from more than a few of the people in the congregation. Rachel started sobbing quietly, never looking up.

“Sit down, Dan” said Pastor Adams. “There is a time and a place for those comments, and it is not in the middle of the service. And I’ll thank you to watch your tongue”

Jim Benson stood up “Randy Harris would be ashamed of the abomination that his son has become”

“Please! Can we have some order here! Show some sense of love for this child! There are circumstances that you don’t know!” shouted Pastor Adams.

Bill Nickles stood up to defend the Harris family. “They have just gone through a tragedy, Dan. Their reasons are their own. Don’t judge unless you want to be judged”

This was greeted by agreement and then derision, and then more people got up to defend and condemn the little girl. Rachel sat with her head down, crying into her mother’s arm.

Then a loud voice echoed through the church. “THAT’S IT!!!!” the room got silent.
It was Garrett Harris, the 14 year old who called the church to order.

“You people make me sick! My sister, yes, my SISTER has done nothing, NOTHING to justify her treatment today. Christians my eye. You’re hypocrites! NOTHING MORE! Do you hear me! Mom, take her out of here. I don’t want her to hear this. Gina complied, her need to protect her daughter outweighing the need to control her son. Gina took the sobbing girl out of the building.

“I have heard the nicest, sweetest person I know called a whore, an it, a pervert, a homosexual. Words that should never be used in this place in the way they were used today. And you know what, NONE OF IT IS TRUE! Rachel was diagnosed with a disorder at birth, but the great Randy Harris, my father made my sister live as a boy for 12 years, all because he couldn’t handle having a girl. She is a girl, not any of the things used to describe her here. You talk about my father being ashamed, like he was some kind of great man. Hell, he ABUSED my sister. By making her live a lie for all that time. Now you bunch of geniuses decide to stand up and ruin a perfectly good church service and scar an already damaged little girl for life.

“Sit down, boy” said Dan Buford

“Well, Mr. Buford, I’ll do better than that. I’ll leave, but not before I’ve had my say. Any sooner, and you’re welcome to try and sit me down. Buford sat down.

“Pastor Adams, you are a good man. Too good for this bunch of morons, if you ask me”
"To those of you who supported my family, thank you. To those of you who didn’t bother to find out the facts before you opened your fat traps....well you know what you can do"

Garrett left the sanctuary that had all of a sudden got very quiet.

Garrett got to the car where Gina was trying to console an hysterical Rachel.

“Mom, I’ll take care of Rachel, take us home”



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