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It was a dark, cold and windy night, blacker than the inside of a closet, which was were I lived. No one knew me — like this. It was blacker then the clouds hovering over my heart, so dark I couldn’t see my hand in front of my face...

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Friday Night

It was a dark, cold and windy night, blacker than the inside of a closet, which was where I lived. No one knew me — like this. It was blacker then the clouds hovering over my heart, so dark I couldn’t see my hand in front of my face. It was a late April night, with the clouds blocking the light of the stars and the moon. Rain was a real probability.

Occasionally the wind whipped my skirt up, giving me a delightful chill - which I relished. I was wearing a lightweight pale blue shirtdress, the only dress I owned; totally inappropriate for walking in the rain.

I had left the house before my parents got home, and the skies had been clear. I’d planned on sneaking into the house after they went to bed. Now it was late, after midnight, past my curfew, and I was in trouble.

Oh, by the way, my name is Robin James, yeah I’m male, and 16 years old. I live with my mom, dad, and fraternal twin sister Robyn. Typical nuclear family; my family knew NOTHING about my alter ego. And yes, my parents really screwed us up with the names. They thought having similar names was “cute.” Argh!!

I had spent a great evening window shopping, planning on returning after my parents were in bed. The shopping went great, I’d looked at and tried on dresses, and a one piece pantsuit that I absolutely loved. It was black, with lace sleeves, and most importantly, it fit. After dinner at the food court, I watched a movie, and planned on going straight home. It didn’t work out that way.

My car was gone. Stolen. Normally it was a fifteen minute drive home. I live in a semi-rural area so there is no bus service, and no taxi. The walk should have taken 45 minutes or so. I was so screwed. I couldn’t call the cops, there was no way I could explain how I was dressed; I couldn’t call home, my cell phone had chosen today to die. Much gorier was the thought of explaining to my folks how I was dressed. I was screwed, totally screwed; hoist on my own petard.

I started walking. I wasn’t sure whether to walk in the pools of light or in the darkness. In the light I had the possibility of being seen by someone I knew, walking in the darkness increased the possibility of being run over. Right then I wasn’t sure which would be worse. About halfway home the clouds opened; it started raining. By the time I was home I was totally drenched; I was certain getting run over would have been the better option.

My hair was a mess and I was having trouble keeping it out of my eyes. I carefully sneaked around to the back of the house. As I opened the gate to the backyard I stumbled over the trash cans, which weren’t where they were supposed to be and they made a terrible noise. The dogs in the neighborhood started barking as lights came on around the cul de sac we lived on. I climbed back to my feet, stepping into a pile of dog poo. Kicking my shoes off, I dropped them into the trash and stepped onto the patio. Someone, probably one of my younger cousins, had left a toy car out. Of course, I stepped on it. As I landed flat on my butt, I screamed, and the lights upstairs came on. I swore under my breath, I would get vengeance on whichever rugrat had left the damned car on MY patio.

As I got to my feet I banged my head on the patio table, and knocked over something which came crashing to the ground. So did I. So there I was, in the dark, sitting on my butt doing my best to stop screaming at the pain.

My dad came to the back door, turned on the lights, took one look at me and yelled. “Young lady, pick yourself up and get to your room. You’re grounded.” He took a closer look,

“Where are your shoes?”

I told him I’d stepped in the dog poop.

“Be sure to clean your shoes off before you come in the house,” he said as he turned to head back upstairs. He called back over his shoulder, “I’ve a meeting first thing in the morning, so I’ll talk to you when I get home. Now get to your room, get cleaned up, and get in bed! Don’t leave this house until I get home, young lady!”

My first thought was ’That’s Dad for you, short sweet and to the point, no question, just an instant sentence.’ My second thought was, ‘Oh shit’, I thought; ‘now my sister is in trouble; and it’s all my fault.’ I quickly grabbed my shoes , cleaned them off and scrambled up the stairs.

Fortunately Dad had already gone into my parents’ room and didn’t see me in the light. Unfortunately the light in my sister’s room was on. Fortunately I could enter the bathroom from the hallway. Unfortunately my sister was sitting on the counter in the bathroom.

“Oh, you are in so much trouble,” she hissed. “Why are you in those clothes, and if any are mine, YOU are so dead. You are going to have to replace them. NO WAY am I going to wear anything after you’ve worn it - eeew cooties!"

I started to tell her a story about a costume party.

“No way Rob, don’t start lying to me now! You have Dad pissed at ME! And if you don’t want more trouble, you better stop trying to lie to me. You know I’m going to know if you lie.”

Yeah, I knew that. I really don’t think I believe in telepathy or anything like that, but I could never lie to Robin. We’d always had some kind of “connection.” I think is was mostly because we were zygotes together, then spent nine months squished against each other and were finally born at the same time and had never really been apart since. Especially when one of us is angry or hurting, it’s like the other almost feels the pain. I suppose scared out of my wits counted; it wasn’t the time to try and lie to her.

“Sis, uh, I don’t know how to tell you. None of the clothes are yours though.”

“Great, so you’re not a thief, just a perv?”

“I bought them with my own money. And I am NOT a perv!”

I was in trouble. I couldn’t help it, I started to cry. “I’ve always wanted to be you,” I started.

She interrupted me, “What do you mean you want to be like me? Why in the world would you want to be me?” she asked, as she jumped off the counter and handed me a kleenex.

“I’m sorry,” I blubbered through the tears, “I’ve always wanted to be a girl, I’ve always thought we should be alike in all ways. I’ve never like being a guy.”

“Oh shit,” she muttered. “This is bad, real bad, Dad is going to freak.”

“That’s why I never told anyone,” I said. I was crying so hard I thought I would puke.
“Let’s get you cleaned up before anything else, then we can talk”

I allowed her to undress me down to my underwear as I continued to sob. Turning on the shower, she pushed me in.

“Hand me your underwear, I’ll get you a warm towel.”

I was too torn up to think, but my sister was taking awfully good care of me, for being mad. I washed the mud off, warming up my rain chilled body. I didn’t feel like I could take too long, Robyn would have my ass. So after getting the makeup off, I rinsed and got out, to find one of the big fluffy towels on the counter. I dried quickly, slipped into my room to find something to wear, only to see my sister was a step ahead of me. I wasn’t sure why, but she’d left a flannel nightgown on my bed. I quickly pulled it on, and then pulled on a robe as Robyn came through the door.

When my parent’s had bought this house, they thought the arrangement with our rooms was good economy. Robyn and I had one bathroom between the two bedrooms. I think the salesman called it a Jack and Jill arrangement. Our parents, after the first year, just called it trouble.

Think about it. You’ve two precocious pre-teens who have their own rooms, AND their own communication channel outside their parent’s control. We could sneak back and forth hatching whatever nefarious plan took our fancy. The only time we weren’t able to sneak around our parents was when Robyn had a sleepover. Then, the door to the bathroom was locked from her side, thus preventing her brother from invading “gyrlspace.” It didn’t stop me from listening through the door and longing to be with the other girls, or as they fancied themselves, gyrls…

Even so, we had a computer network in the house that allowed two way messages. Only trouble with that, was Dad could figure out if we’d gotten in trouble just by looking at the logs, something we remembered after being caught once.

But I digress…. (I’ve always wanted to use that phrase!!). Robyn came in and hugged me. Seems our private “bandwidth” was still working, Robyn’s eye’s were red, reflecting my own pain.

“Okay runt,” she said — she was born 17 minutes before me, and figured that made me the runt of the litter — “talk to me.”

As we sat down on my bed, she’d pulled out a brush and began removing the snarls and tangles I had as a result of the rain. Now, I don’t know if CIA uses this tactic or not, but we’d found that brushing the other’s hair caused us to really open up to each other, kind of like flipping a switch. Robyn could have asked my deepest darkest secret and I would have willingly told it to her. Oh wait, she was asking my deepest darkest secrets. She asked, and I answered.

This was going too easy. That was … until … “What more is there to talk about,” I said, “My life is ending as soon as dad gets home. He doesn’t even know my car was stolen.”

“What!” she shrieked in my ear. “You got OUR car stolen? Where the hell were you, and why didn’t you call?” she all but yelled in my ear. Then, calming down, “Oh, you couldn’t call, could you?”

“I would have, if my never to be sufficiently damned cell phone hadn’t decided to quit on me. I would have gladly told anyone anything just to get home and out of that freaking rain.”

“Okay ‘Sis,’” (WHAT??) she said, “you want to tell me about being dressed as a girl, and why didn’t I know about it before you got me in trouble?” All the while, she kept brushing my hair, I was practically purring.

“Roby, I don’t know, but I’ve always felt different than everyone else.”

“No Duh, runt,” she said, “Everyone else IS different; it’s only you and me that are the same.”

“Yeah, that’s sort of part of the problem, I’m not even the same as you,” I sobbed.

Robyn turned me around and looked into my eyes. Another switch was flipped, more barriers went down between us; Robyn’s eyes widened as she truly began to understand. “I love you Runt. I’ll take Dad’s punishment. We’ll figure out something. But we are the same, always have been always will be.” She pulled me into a hug.

If you’re not a twin you’ll never know that feeling; the feeling of being totally one with another person, a feeling of comfort, knowing that you’ll never truly be alone.

“You can’t do that,” I told her. “I’ll tell Dad and take my medicine.”

“Runt, you don’t think so well, do you? What are you going to tell him? Dad, you screwed up and couldn’t tell Robyn and me apart? Or, Dad my car was stolen? Or, Dad I want to be a girl? Or, Dad I’m sorry I was out past curfew? There has to be a better way!”

I just groaned, sobbing into Robyn’s robe. My sister may be crazy, we both are come to think of it, but she had her own ideas of how to keep me out of perpetual grounding. She dried my tears and put me to bed.

“Listen Runt, just go to sleep, we’ll talk about it in the morning.” Then she did something she had not done in years, she snuggled up next to me, rubbed my neck and back, and held me until I’d fallen asleep.

---

I woke in the morning feeling better than I had in forever. Robyn was gone, but in her place was a little rag doll my mom had sewn for me when I was a baby. Though I told no one, it was one of my most precious treasures. Robyn must have put her in bed with me in the middle of the night.

I went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth, that sort of thing and Robyn must have heard, for she immediately opened the door and came on in.

“Okay runt, I’ve a brilliant idea,” she started, “we’re going to twin up and go talk to mom about everything.” She explained her plans and I grinned at her.

Now for those of you who don’t know, when she said twin up, she meant we were to dress and act the same. Like a whirlwind, Robyn came in with one of her bras, fastened it around me, stuffing it with some tissue. We pulled on Levi 501s and identical “Linkun Park” t-shirts we’d bought last summer. Our hair was about the same length. Neither of us wore very much makeup and in the mirror you’d have had trouble distinguishing between us. We hadn’t done this in forever. Our parents asked us to quit it when we were Junior High school. That suggestion became a rule in High School. The bra was a new addition, but I was getting kind of curious as to what Mom’s reaction would be.

We waited till Dad left and went downstairs. “Good morning mother,” we said in unison. “How are you today?”

Even if we got in trouble for it, it was worth it. Mom’s eyes flicked back and forth between us.

“Okay you two, what’s going on? And, by the way, one of you, if not both, are grounded,” she told us, though her face was desperately trying to break into a grin.

Doing our best to move in unison we pulled bowls down and poured cereal and sat down at the table.

“I have to admit,” she said, finally smiling; “this is the best twin-up you guys have done in a long time. You ready to tell me what the deal is?” All the while we were eating in unison, spoon to the bowl to the mouth, chew 10 times, and repeat.

Robyn and I looked at each other, and she began. “Mom it wasn’t Robyn that came in late last night, it was Robin,” she said. The identical pronunciation of our names continued the confusion.

Mom decided to play along. “If it wasn’t Robyn, then it must be Robin, or if not Robin, then it must be Robyn?”

Sis took it in stride, “Exactly, and I don’t think I should be in trouble when you can’t figure out which one of us I am!”

Mom was now grinning, “Well, you know the answer to that young lady, or is it ladies? If I can’t tell whether it was Robin or Robyn, or if it’s Robyn or Robin then I’ll just have to either ground both of you or neither of you.”

Together we replied, “Exactly!” With that we began our eating routine again looked at her smugly. Mom continued with her examination, looking from one to the other. Finally she pointed at me.

“Nice try, but your boobs are lopsided.” With that we all broke down in laughter.

“Okay mom, you got me; but I need your help. Robyn wasn’t the one dad caught. It was me,” I confessed.

Tears began to leak out of my eyes and Sis reached over to hold my hand.

“Mom, I don’t know how to tell you this, but I’ve always wanted to be a girl,” I blurted out. Sis decided we’d double team mom, “And we’ve “misplaced” our car.”

“Which is why I was so late. I walked home from the mall.”

“She didn’t call because her cell phone died, and the mall was closed and there weren’t any pay phones.

“I’m sorry I woke Dad, but someone had put the garbage cans too close to the gate in the backyard, and I didn’t know it and knocked them over.”

“Stop it girls!” Mom demanded, let’s settle one thing at a time, “So you want to be a girl, but how did you “misplace” your car?” she asked. “That’s gonna be the biggest reason you’ll be grounded.”

“When I came out of the movie, my car was gone, so I had to walk home.” I confessed to her. “I think it’s stolen.”

“Well, why do you think that, and where was it?”

“Mom, I really thought it was in the parking lot right between the food court and the movie theatre. I couldn’t find it when I came out, but truthfully I panicked. I was dressed as a girl, everything was closed or closing. It could still be at the mall for all I know.

Mom looked at the two of us. “Robyn, get your sister a purse and the two of you get ready to go. Put a little color on, you both look bland this morning. I want to leave, and hopefully find your car before the Mall opens. So be ready in 20 minutes, okay? And Robin, see if you can’t find a better “stuffing” if I’m going out in public with you!”

---

Robyn and I rushed upstairs and she did her makeup in no time at all, and then turned to me,

“Want some help?”

I thanked her and said no, but you can veto what I do, and with that I brought out my “stash” of makeup. Everything was the same as hers. That was how I knew what would be best. 15 minutes later, after a correction or two by Sis, we were both ready to go. Lip and eye makeup identical with just a hint of blush, we rushed downstairs. We both pulled on identical Windbreakers with the school name logo “Samuel Gompers High School, the Fighting Muskrats” silk screened on the back.

There was little to distinguish between us, other than Robyn’s hobo purse and my Ren Fair leather purse.

“My, aren’t you two the cutest little peas in a pod,” Mom teased us.

“Yes, and we’re grateful we take after you, Mommy Dearest,” Robyn teased right back. Me? I sat quietly in my seat trying to look innocent and sorrowful at the same time. Sis turned to me “And as for you, Sister Dear, try to look a little less constipated!” I stuck my tongue out at her and looked out the window.

Mom pulled into the Mall and started driving around. The sky was predictably clear and the day hot. Thankfully, it was still before the stores opened so there were few cars in the lots. She started in the lot by the Food Court and started to drive counterclockwise around the mall.

You can’t imagine the relief in my eyes when we came across my, (well Robyn and my), Taurus. It was 10 years old, but it ran well, and wasn’t too beat up. Robyn looked at me, and stuck out her tongue,

“Told you runt, you just got scared last night!”

Mom pulled into a parking spot next to our car.

“Okay you two, I’ll call your father and get you out of trouble for last night. But, we’re going to have to sit down tonight and talk about what’s going on. I have to tell you, your twin-up had me laughing too hard to be mad at you. I hope to do the same with your father. I’m NOT going to turn this into a mother daughter shopping trip, but we are going into the mall, and I’m buying you identical outfits. You’re going to have to do your best twin-up ever tonight.

Believe it or not, your dad and I have worried about this for years. You better be ready to talk to us, and we’re going to listen, then talk through this whole mess.”

Robyn looked at me, and I looked at her, totally confused by this turn of events. When the mall opened, mom took us in through the Sears Store, where she picked up a package of panties for me (same size as my sister — Doh!) and a bra that had better padding than the tissue I’d used. Same as Roby, and of course, it fit. She then had us move us, marshaling us actually, to the Charlotte Russe store where we were given little choice, Mom chose burgundy colored tops, then on to Anchor Blue for short skirts.

She wasn’t kidding when she said this wasn’t a “fun” trip. She moved from one place to another at warp speed. Neither of us had a chance to do anything more than try on the clothes she selected. We stopped at Payless Shoe Store (Yech) and bought identical pairs of one and a half inch heels. Then we went home.

---

“Okay you two, I want you both in your rooms, and your rooms better be clean, bathroom too. I’ll call you when lunch is ready. After all, since neither of you is grounded, both of you are!”

It was maybe half an hour later when Mom came to inspect. Since both of us are clean freaks, there was little for her to comment on. She did notice my rag doll was out of my dresser and on my bed.

“You having trouble sleeping Sweetheart?” she asked.

I told her yes, and that somehow my doll had wound up in my bed last night. Robyn, watching from the door gave Mom and me, a “who me?” look as Mom pulled me into a hug.

‘Wow, first hug of the day, and I’m still dressed like a girl,’ I thought to myself.

“Okay you two, lunch is ready. I’d like to be finished by one. You two have hair appointments at one thirty.” Again the two of us looked from one to the other in confusion, Mom definitely had something going on and neither of us had a clue what it was. Still, it was better than being grounded.

---

Mom had fixed chicken salad for lunch. Afterward we went to the salon where Mom had taken us almost all our lives. Mom had apparently called ahead, Liz, the stylist was grinning ear to ear.

“So, the twins decided to go for the identical look, Chris?” she asked Mom.

“Yes, the whole schmear please, Liz, identical haircuts, identical manicure, and identical makeup; please make their makeup suitable for a teen’s evening, please.” Mom just looked at us and shooed us on into Liz’s waiting arms.

Haircuts were no big deal except the style was decidedly more feminine that usual for me. Our nails were matching plum colored and just a bit longer than I usually wore. Liz cleaned up my nails, both hands and feet, and I sat back watching as Liz finished Roby and Mom. Two hours later, Robyn and I looked more alike than ever before.

---

Back home, back to incarceration, Robyn and I talked about the day so far.

“What do you suppose Mom meant when she said she and Dad had talked about this?” I asked.

“Who ever knows what the ‘rents talk about, but when they’re talking ‘bout us, I wish we’d figgered out how to bug their room,” she said.

“Yeah, but Eeeewww, what if they were doing something and we heard it? I still think we were better off not bugging their room.”

“Runt, this time they’ve been talking about you! And they’re talking about you as a girl!”

“That scares me. But I’m still glad we didn’t hear them doing the nasty.”

“Okay, okay you’re right. That thought is just gross. But what do you think they’ve been talking about?”

“Uh, me? Keep up here, Grandma, you’re supposed to be the sneaky one.”

“Oh just shut up!” She hates that name. “Of course they’ve been talking about you, but what they’ve been talking about you, is what I want to know."

“How long to ground me?”

“Don’t be dense; it’s got to have something to do with you dressing like a girl.”

“Did you see Mom’s face? It was like it was no big deal. I was dying inside and she took us shopping! WTF? Then at the mall, it was like she was turning us into Barbie, you know, like her own personal dress up doll. And those outfits? I mean she spent at least $300 dollars on those two outfits.”

“Then she spent all that money at the salon. She’s not telling us the truth. Runt, you’re onto something. I think it’s time to talk to her.”

“Yeah, what if she won’t talk?”

“What can she do, ground us?” she asked. I fell over laughing, ‘Dumb, we are already were grounded, what is there to lose?"

“Okay Grandma, what do we do?” I asked, she smacked me with a pillow. Did I mention she doesn’t like being called “Grandma,” but hey, I don’t like being called “runt.”

“I’m going to call Mom up here and see what she has to say for herself.”

Robyn didn’t get the chance. Mom came up, carrying the results of today’s raid on the mall. “I want the two of you dressed and ready to leave by 5:30. We’ll be going out to dinner.

“Robin,’ she said, looking at me, “I know this seems sudden, and you may be uncomfortable, but I want you to do your best. A lot of what happens depends on you. If you really want to be a girl, you need to show that to your Dad. Don’t be afraid, he won’t yell at you or anything. And by the way, you two are not grounded.”

“But Mom, wait, we’re not grounded?”

“No, listen, I know you have questions, but please, let me explain and answer your questions after we meet your Dad, okay? Now you two need to get ready.”

With that, Mom left the two of us alone. I couldn’t help but start to cry. I wasn’t in trouble. I WASN’T in trouble! I turned to Robi, “Sis, I’m not in trouble!”

“Yeah Runt, I figured that out,” she said, grabbing the Kleenex and giving me a tissue, “but you better not ruin your makeup, Runt!”

She laughed as I tried to control my emotions. I’d been so scared since last night. I still didn’t know why, but I was willing to go along with it, I wasn’t in trouble. It didn’t take all that long to dress, since the only thing we had to do was change clothes. I have to say this, Mom was thorough, and she had identical earrings for us. I’d persuaded Mom to let me pierce my ears a year ago, telling her, “all the kids” are doing it. I don’t know if I convinced her with my argument or with my determined nagging; but she’d taken me to the mall and watched as they poked holes in my ears.

There wasn’t a bit of difference between the two of us. We met Mom downstairs, she looked great!

“Okay you two, turn around and let me look at you.”

We twirled around so she could inspect us. “Very good, now let me look closer.” With that, she got right up In our faces.

“Makeup still looks good, earrings are cute. Oh my. I knew I’d find something. You two are not quite perfect.”

Sis and I looked at each other. Mom’s attitude had gone from friendly and bubbly, to some intense kind of monster. She was practically growling.

She looked at Sis and pointed her finger, “You are different,” she growled, then she giggled. Her giggle turned into a laugh, “Got you! You thought you were so cool this morning till she,” she pointed at me, “had lopsided boobs.”

“You two are marvelous. The only difference is, Robyn has two holes in her ears. Dad will never notice. Come on, we have a dinner date to go to.”

When my heart restarted I excused myself and went to use the bathroom. Something was going on and I didn’t know what it was, but it might be the best thing that ever happened to me. I finished, washed and joined Mom and Robyn in the front hall. Mom had out windbreakers over her arm as we went out to the car.

“I don’t think it’s going to rain, but just in case we’ll take this with us. Come on, hurry, your dad’s going to beat us to Lena’s.”

---

Lena’s was a pretty swanky place. I knew Mom and Dad went there often, but this was only the second time Robyn and I would be there. The drive was maybe twenty minutes. Dad was waiting at the entrance when we pulled into the lot. He followed us to where we parked and opened Mom’s door.

“Hi Sweetheart,” he said, kissing her.

“Take it to the bedroom, you two,” Robyn said. I was mortified. Sis had a smart mouth, but didn’t she remember how important this was to me?

“Relax,” she said, “we’ll have them confused before we get to the restaurant.” She grabbed me by the arm and started towards the door of the restaurant, carefully changing places with me. Dad looked from one of us to the other. A wistful look crossed his face as he turned to Mom,

“So I’ve lost my son?” he asked.

“Shush, we’ll talk inside. But you still have two beautiful children. Would it be so bad if we made a mistake?”

Dad looked at me, then Robyn, and then to Mom,

“They are beautiful. I hate to say it, but I can’t tell the difference.” With that he held open the door, “After you, Ladies.”

Mom, Robyn and I walked in, followed by Dad. We were seated by the hostess, and given menus. “What would you like for dinner, ladies,” he asked. I looked around the restaurant. The people were all dressed so nicely. I whispered to Robyn and we decided to split an order,

“Dad, could we share an order of Chicken Parmesan, and a salad?” I asked.

“Which one are you?”

Sis and I replied together. “Robin” we replied together, sharing our identically sounding names. Dad’s eyes bugged out.

“I’m Rob Dad,” I said, “I’m sorry I knocked over the garbage cans and woke you last night. I’m sorry I want to live like this,” I said as I started to cry.

“Hey, it’s okay. We knew this might happen. Let’s order, then I’ll tell you a story.”
The waitress took our orders and brought our drink orders.

Dad began to talk. “Let me tell you two a story it took years for your Mom and I to find out. Once upon a time …” He grinned at Mom … “I’ve always wanted to start a story that way.”

“Once upon a time there was a lady and her husband who were deeply in love. They wanted to have children sooo bad. For years they tried to have children. For 12 years that Lady and that man tried over and over, every month without fail to make a baby. Of course they enjoyed trying,” he said, glancing at Mom. She elbowed him while grinning at his comment.

“Then one day the Lady and her husband visited a doctor who gave the lady medicine that helped her conceive. A few months later a miracle occurred. The Lady was pregnant. The Lady and her husband were going to have a baby. Then one day the doctors told the Lady and her husband they would be having twins. They were extremely happy. Then the babies came into the world. The first was a beautiful baby girl. Everything was perfect. Then the second baby was born; and that baby was beautiful too. But something was wrong. The doctor’s told the parents the second child had a problem. It was nothing that was life threatening, and the Lady and her babies went home and were very, very happy.”

“The story, of course, is about you two. Robi, you were the older and nothing seemed to be wrong with you. Rob, the doctors couldn’t tell what gender you were, because your external genitalia were ambiguous. The Lady, your Mom, and I didn’t know what to do. You had a penis, but you also had a vagina. The surgeries to close your vagina and construct a scrotum were easier than removing the penis and reconstructing the urethra, the tube your urine comes out. Your mom and I have watched and waited for years."

The waitress brought our salads. Dad had ordered soup, so he was able to continue talking.

“There have been lots of tests on the two of you. Every year you had a physical and blood was taken. What you don’t know, is that we’ve let the doctors examine part of the blood to determine your genetic patterns. We never did anything or talked to you about it because you always seemed happy as a boy. I guess maybe you were too good at hiding what you felt.“Your Mom and I were desperate to have kids. We knew there were risks. But we didn’t expect what happened.

Rob, genetically you and your sisters are the product of three separate babies that formed in the beginning in your mother’s womb. There were two girls and one boy. Very early as the three of you grew, something happened, and the boy child was absorbed into the other two babies. Genetically you are both girls. Genetically you are also boys, but don’t worry about that. You two are what are called Chimeras. Last year you both had MRI’s. Those studies indicates that both of you are fully functional females. Since you’ve told your Mom you want to be a girl, we will give you that chance.”

“Honey, if you want this, we’ll see the doctors and the psychologists. If you and they agree, we’ll see to it you get the surgery and the help you need to make it happen,” Mom said, hugging me.

So much for walking home in the rain; sometimes things happen that seem to be the worst thing in the world. And sometimes they work out for good. I’ve always believed in God, and am grateful that in the end things worked out.

Soon Robyn and I will be identical, the three of us will become two, and we’ll always remember the one.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; Before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations." Jeremiah 1:5