Dream

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Dream
by Wren Phoenix

Jesse sat in his apartment. He was daydreaming again. It was always the same dream. The girl stood on a hill, her long white dress and shoulder length brown hair blowing in the wind. She always had a look of absolute love in her eyes.

Jesse knew who she was, of course. He had known her all his life. She was Jesse.

She had first shown up when he was in High school. Occasionally, in his dreams, she would brush her hair out of her eyes, or take a deep breath, as if waiting for someone, but otherwise, it remained the same daydream.

He never spoke of her at school. He had other dreams at night, and she was never a part of those.

After he graduated from school he had taken a job at a local company, where he quickly worked his way up to a comfortable position as the head of sales. He was fairly attractive, at just under six feet with light brown hair, and hazel eyes. He had a way of making almost anyone comfortable. He spoke fluent Spanish and Japanese, and was scrupulously honest. He knew that his business hinged on his reputation, and he guarded it fiercely.

He had considered making the gender transition, but knew that it would not have been accepted well by his clients. He hoped one day to become more than a salesman, and perhaps he could consider something then. He was still young, after all, and his body was not a problem. After all, he had a very clear idea of what his female self would look like.

He did see a therapist, to help him to deal with his issues, but he had made it clear that he was fairly content at the time. He never dated, although he was friendly with almost everyone. There were many people , of both sexes , that had tried to become more than friendly with him, but he never accepted. It finally became accepted that he was just Jesse, and that was all.

His only real friend was his Assistant, Kenny. Kenny had learned from Jesse that a reputation was his life, and he took it to heart. He knew all of Jesse’s secrets, but he would never betray his Mentor and best friend. Jesse told no one else that he had a crush on David, the Art Director and son of the Company owners.

David was a character. Flamboyant and attractive, he had many dates, but no relationships. He told everyone that he was looking for just the right girl, although who that might be was a puzzle, even to him. Many women actively pursued the dark haired, wealthy young man. He worked because he wanted to, and he was always fun to be around.

David had begun a new project, and he seemed driven to finish it. He refused to reveal any details about it. He remained friendly and kept his workload current, but any free time was given over to his mysterious painting. One afternoon he announced that the mystery was ended, and he had finally found the one who he called “My Love”. That person was the focus of his mysterious painting. He had placed the painting on display in his studio.

As David walked back to his office, several people went to look at the painting he had been working on so intently. They noted the fine detail, the amazing depth he had achieved, but more than anything, they were drawn to the subject matter. To say that they were surprised would have been a major understatement. This could play out so wrong for both parties, but…

Jesse and Kenny came back from lunch, and heard about David’s painting. Jesse thought that it was an odd way to reveal a person’s feelings. More than that, he wished that David had never finished the painting. As long as it had been uncompleted, he could continue to dream, but now that was over. Eventually, he would have to see it anyway, so he walked down to the studio.

“So, who is it that our Romeo is carrying the torch for?” He asked, jokingly. Inside, he knew his strange, precious dream was dying. He’d known it was only a fantasy, but still, it felt like his heart was being pulled out of his chest. He made his way through the room, and he noticed that a few people looked his way with odd looks on their faces, but no one said anything.

The picture showed a couple, obviously in love, standing on a hill. The man was most definitely David. The girl was…

“It’s…Me?” Jesse’s knees were weak and shaking, but he couldn’t seem to move away. How did he know? How could he know? Jesse couldn’t believe it.

The picture showed Jesse as he wished she could be. She wore the same beautiful, long dress, with her shoulder length hair blowing in the wind, just as she had in the dream. The girl in the painting had her hand on the man’s face, while they looked lovingly in each other’s eyes.

Everyone stared at him, silently, while tears covered his face. He reached out to touch the picture, carefully, as though it were a soap bubble which could pop, and vanish in an instant. He traced the faces with his finger. It just couldn’t be.

Yet here it was.

He didn’t see that many of the others had tears in their eyes. He barely realized that they were there at all.

“I…I have to go.” He tried, but he could barely stand, much less move. Slowly he stumbled towards the door, still dazed, when he felt a hand reach out to support him. Kenny looked at him, and Jesse could see that there were tears in Kenny’s eyes, too.

“I’ll take you, Jesse.” Kenny led his boss to the door, and Jesse felt several hands reach out, touching him quickly, as if to say, Go for it, we love you, too.

David sat in his office, lost in thought, his eyes closed while he listened to the music in his headphones. How would Jesse react? He wished he could have seen it, but his feelings were like raw nerves. If Jesse was angry, it would help to be able to cry in his own office, without everyone’s pity. David was a proud man, in his own way.

He was so involved in the music that he didn’t hear Jesse as he quietly took a seat, with Kenny’s help. Kenny smiled and winked, then walked out and carefully closed the door.

Jesse sat, quietly staring at David, while he tried to think of what to say.

Finally, David turned and saw him. He took off his headphones, and waited for the worst.

They stared at each other for some time. Neither moved, or said a word. David was overjoyed to see that Jesse did not seem angry, but still, he was so afraid to say anything that might cause a scene. When Jesse finally spoke, it was quiet, but it had been silent for so long that it was quite clear.

“How did you know?”

“A dream. It was so clear and intense that I could not get it out of my mind. I had to paint it, there was no other choice.”

“I do love you. God help me, I do.”

David almost passed out. He had dreamed of hearing those words.

“I love you so much it hurts, Jesse. Will you let me help you? I want you to be the real you, the way YOU want to be.”

“The way we should be? Yes, I will.”

It hadn’t been easy, or quick, but eventually the two of them stood together on the hill. She touched his face, with absolute love in her eyes, and said what they had waited for.

“I do.”



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