I was recently offered a chance to be part of a Polygamous relationship. The offer was withdrawn when the other wife had second thoughts, but it did last long enough for me to think about the issues involved. As far as I am concerned the idea of screaming passion filled nights is long past. For me, the companionship is what would matter. I decided that given the chance that yes, I would accept the relationship, and when it did not happen, yes, there were tears. However, the other woman and I are still very close friends and I understand her reservations.
I am just wondering if any of the other women here would accept such a proposal.
Khadijah Gwen
Comments
Sweetie, The only difficulty
Sweetie,
The only difficulty of the type of relationship you speak of ... you must get alone with 2 or more persons. Religion aside, group relationships have been around for many eons.
For myself, if you love both persons it is simple; however, wife one is the key as she holds court in all things involving estrogen. But then, I was raised in the near, middle and far east so look at life differently.
I am sorry it did not work out for you, the company, family relationships would have been rewarding.
Thinking and praying for you.
Kendra
Khadijah Gwen, I was under
Khadijah Gwen,
I was under the impression that polygamy had been outlawed many years ago, at least here in the United States, even by the Mormons. So this offer to you would mean you would have to leave this country to become a member of this family unit? I understand from your previous blogs that you profess the faith of Islam; but I would be really saddened if you wound up involved with someone(s) who are so fundementally "overboard" in their interpretation of the faith that you, as a person, might suffer greatly due their views of life and the role(s) of Women. Hugs, Jan
50,000 participants in Polygamy
I just saw an old Oprah clip on the subject on youtube, and it was really interesting. There are estimated to be 50,000 people who do it. The also had the young lady who was foribly married at 14 to Warren something and she said her experience was so horrendous that she'd stay alone the rest of her life if it took that to avoid it again.
Yes, is is against the law, but so is Pot. :)
Khadijah Gwen
Actually it's only illegal
Actually it's only illegal if you marry two (or more) people, legally. So long as there's no more than one legal marriage involved, you can be with as many people as you want! :)
Personally I don't understand why anyone has a problem with it. So long as everyone involved knows what's going on and agrees to it, what's the harm? I think it should be legal, but considering the trouble we're having getting same sex marriages legalized, I don't suppose that's going to happen any time soon. :(
SalessÂ
"But it is also tradition that times *must* and always do change, my friend." - Eddie Murphy, Coming To America
It is illegal
Because it allows for a variety of schemes, maybe. It actually has a wide variety of reasons, as stated here. You can also go for other article. It is on Forms of nonmonogamy.
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
I have been in a few poly
I have been in a few poly relationships and I think they are perfectly fine, so long as you talk with each other. The more people you add the more communication you need. But if I had the chance to get into another poly relationship I totally would.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Heather
We are the change that will save the world.
Poly with more than one man!
When I was trying to do some messing with BDSM, a man wanted me as part of his um Hareem, but he also wanted to do it with other men TOO! Yikes! It just tried to cross boundaries that I did not even know I had. I mean I could share one man with more than one woman but touching a thingie that had been up some other man's butt, Yikes! I mean I don't want to offend anyone, I mean what ever honks your horn but it seems I am absolutely not allowed, like it is like completely unacceptable! :(
I have since discovered that I can't do vaginal fisting; it is way too small, and I can not have sex with someone who is not my husband. I really thought I could and I really wanted to be very licensious and wanton and hedonistic, but that gene seems to have gotten lost or something. :(
It seems that there is this inviolable curtain or force field or Momma Karma or implanted scrupples in me depriving me of all the fun! I even have aquaintances who do the whole doper thing and once when I went to a rave, I drank two beers, took two Vicoden and ate some special um special brownies :) Wow, I thought, this is my big chance to lose lingerie on the dance floor, and let the cleaner guy find it the next day and wonder what went on; letting his dirty little mind wonder. Geeze, I got one of my best slips that way. :) Well, so when I asked one of them for some LSD or that other um like spacer drug. He looked at me like my big brother and told me no way no how, and if he heard about me asking anyone else, he was going to make me sit down and stay there the rest of the night. How could he do that? He's not the boss of me and I told him so, but then he gave me this look that said he meant business, and then he was going to hit my butt, so I scurried off like a scared kitty. :(
GEEZE! I never got to do the party animal thing because this stuuupid loser 'Nam thing was going on and I was invited. I hafta say that I almost showed up for my physical in my favorite Bra and Panties and seeing the aftermath of it all in friends I know, I shoulda.
I feel like I am impaled on the holy sister nun pedistal, and when I try to misbehave, I have bad dreams and nightmares and cry and feel awful!
Shoot ! DARN! They even told me to stop swearing because I just messed it up and embarrassed real swearers! :(
Khadijah Kajiria Gwen
Not impossible
While not impossible I think polygamy is a lot more difficult to get stable then a simple couple. On the other hand, when it does work, it sounds very appealing to me.
The most stable (and common) form seems to be polygyny. To make this work, you'll have to get some women who are very good friends and who are willing to share a man among them. Historically, I believe this often was the case with sisters sharing a single husband (hence the "sister-wife" label you often find for it). In my eyes, this has the advantages of being able to give the women a "support group" for both emotional and practical issues. I doubt this would ever really work well without a deep bond between the women involved.
As far as I know Tibet is about the only place in the world where polyandry is practiced. I have a hard time seeing how this can be stable since women are on average not all that interested in multiple male partners and males tend to be rather jealous. I'd almost call this kind of setup "unnatural" except for the fact that this word leaves such a bad taste in my mouth.
The group-marriage thing I can only see working if it consists as some kind of "wife swap club" and every woman in that marriage would have a 'main' man. The idea that you grab some bisexual men and women and dump them together I can only see happening in fiction. Especially since I get the impression there are way less bisexual people in the world then there are homosexuals. For me bisexual means more then being able to have sex with either gender without vomitting.
I suppose to be complete you'd also have to consider groups of three or more people of the same gender to be polygamy, but I've actually never encountered such thing, not even in fiction.
Hugs,
Kimby
Hugs,
Kimby