Theide's blog

Standing on the cusp

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So I've made my decisions and now that it is time to begin implementing them, I'm really quite scared, much more so than I had hoped or thought I might be. I look at myself and think I really must be quite the coward, to have pushed myself to almost dying just because I couldn't stand the thought of losing love, when that isn't even a certainty. I mean, I'm truthfully not changing from the person he fell in love with, I've been the same way the whole time.

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Home makeovers and such!

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Okay, I have some interesting info to share today. It turns out you can get a beauty consultant to come to your home and do a full makeover on you in private and then sell you the products!

I had no idea this was an option except on the very high end, but I was talking with my sister a while ago and she sells Mary Kay cosmetics part time. I wound up asking her if she had a problem doing the home makeovers for TG people and she replied "Of course not!".

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OK, I know one post on this subject has been locked and I agree with that decision.

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I didn't lose any friends on 9/11, but a friend of mine was there(in NYC)and sheltered a lot of people when it went down. I have lost friends in the subsequent wars.

I will not make any political commentary of any kind here, and I would ask yawl to please follow suit, but I would like to ask one thing, that we all take a moment to remember our honored dead.

That, I think, is only proper.

Thank you.

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I have made offensive comments and I am deeply sorry

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I'm not exactly sure what I said because the blog entry was depublished and I did not save it on my own machine.

In any case, apparently I have offended people and I apologize for this.

Specifically, I apologize to Kristina and Angharad.

I am sorry, I did not mean to be offensive.

I would be more specific, but I'm not sure exactly how I offended.

I will no longer darken your doors.

I abase myself, beg your forgiveness, every other way I can think of to say that I am truly sorry and I hope you can overlook my intolerable rudeness.

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Strange Days

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Admin Note: Sephrena I have disabled commenting because this thread is spiralling towards argument. It's best to leave this be and agree that some cannot agree on this issue.
 
 
Sometimes, I kinda doubt my femininity. I mean, I grew up with images of women who were just as strong as the men they loved, but to be honest, I think I’d have to call myself a Warrior woman if I’m any sort of woman at all. Think Red Sonja, except more militantly feminist.

I suppose today at the dollar store would be a perfect example of what I mean.

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I'm so far beyond lost.

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I don't even know how to say this. I've always known that my man doesn't like women in any way, in fact, he hates anything even remotely tinged with femaleness. I, on the other hand, have never wanted to be anything else. I thought for many years that I could just accept his misogynistic world and deal with it, just cope with being who biology fated me to be.

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I'm tired of being ripped off!

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I'm so angry right now. I just had a confrontation with the folks who run the convenience store down the street.I've provided them with computer and network support for the past 3 years and have never charged them a dime. In return, I've been allowed to run an account with them which I pay off monthly.

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Thank you all so much!

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Thank you all so much for your kind words last night. They truly helped me through a crisis in my life. I think it is sorted out for now, but I do not expect the road ahead to be much easier. Hubby and I have some really major issues to work out and I can only hope that they work out in a way that I like and that he likes as well.

We argued for almost 18 hours last night, but we wound up sleeping in each others arms.

A large part of that is due to you folks here, and for that you have my eternal gratitude.

Thanks.

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Help?

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I have a fairly major problem. I'm stuck in a situation I don't know how to solve. I've spent 20 years trying to be the male my husband wants me to be, demands me to be. I've come to the point where I can't stand it anymore and I don't know what to do. He has never even let me dress up in the house, apart from anyone else, because he is so against me even trying to look female.

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