So, tonight I went to TDOR. I was surprised that the attendance was around 200 people, about 2/3 MtF folk. FtM folk were there along with some Lesbians but not many gay men according to my GADAR.
By the end, I was wondering if I should have more connection with the T community, and in what capacity? I don't really want to lead a group because frankly I am not in need of a position of authority.
So now I am wondering if I should just provide moral support for a group; show up and see what I can contribute?
Frankly, I have been a bitch to many in the community when I could have perhaps been more supportive. I have my reasons for being that way and now I am wondering if I have been wrong?
Comments
Being a bitch.
Isn't that either a furry fetish or human petplay?
First, do no harm.
Hi Gwen.
Before you decide to get more deeply involved with TDOR, (What does that stand for?) remember that first you must avoid harming your own wellbeing.
We have chatted often about our mutual histories and I understand some of the bruising you have suffered though not all, by a long chalk.
Firstly therefore try and avoid harming yourself, secondly try to avoid hurting others, thirdly only render what help you are able to render without breaking the first tenet set out above.
I don't want to see you being further bruised for I know you to be generally a gentle and sensitive person. So make sure your sensitivity does not expose you to any unwelcome approaches, or pressures or exploitations. Set clear lines where you can and explain why you object when you feel that less certain and poorly demarked lines have been crossed. Don't be afraid to speak plainly but not offensively when you feel something needs to be said.
Be brave girl and I hope you find some kernel of satisfaction and/or support and/or comfort by treating with the TDOR.
(I'm thinking that the TDOR is akin to some sort of LGBT group.)
Hugs,
Skype you soon.
Bevs.
XXX
I think it stands for...
"Binged" it (as opposed to googled it). Transgender Day Of Remembrance came up... seems to fit the theme.
Transgender Day of Rememberance
It is hard to know if I can be of any help or do any good. I have really puritanical ideas of what a woman is and try very hard to practice what I preach. So, I just do not know how many new women would want to be like me.
The last time I was approached by a new transwoman, she tried to get me to slather tonnes of makeup on my face and get involved in "in your face" activism. Worse yet, many women in the church were offended by her and wanted me to set her straight. Well, she was not having any of that.
So, when I started living as a woman, I decided to be a woman amoung other women, that being the only role that made sense to me. As I write this ... maybe I'll just keep doing what I have been doing.
Gwendolyn