Read the Book of Tobias.

Like other very Christian books this one doesn't make it into every Bible. It's interesting how many Bible versions there are. The Book of Tobias is all about compassion.

Sweetheart . . . do you believe in a compassionate God? If you do, you know how bogus most religions have become.

Jill

Dorothy, read A Summer's Odyssey by Jennifer Sue. Her main character is a Christian who found her true nature as well as loving support where she continues to mature into a young woman. It has many Bible verses showing God's acceptance of us. http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/10770/summers-odyssey Please read and tap into the Faith that she has.

Hello Dorothy,

You raise an interesting point, and I’m pleased to see all the cogent and thoughtful responses you have received. I thought I’d put my oar in these waters.

If we were to ask the question, did a god, super-being or whatever create the universe in which we find ourselves, the answer is a resounding, ‘No.’ That is, after five or six centuries of investigations unlimited by religions, governments, politics or other human activities, we are on the verge of beginning to understand what this universe is, how it formed, and its ultimate fate. We have slowly and carefully amassed sufficient information that we can begin to consider a single explanation for the universe and everything within it. This explanation fulfills the requirements of scientific fact, that which we in the sciences call a Theory.

Before you equate the scientific term Theory with your word theory, let me explain what is meant by the technical term. In the sciences, a Theory performs four functions simultaneously. It must perform them all at the same time, or it is not a Theory. First, it must explain the phenomena within the scope of the Theory. Second, it must accurately predict phenomena within the scope of the Theory. Third, it must provide an environment in which exploration, analysis and experimentation can occur within the phenomenological scope of the Theory. And finally, it must be useful in creating modifications of phenomena within the scope of the Theory in a real and predictable manner. So, the term Theory as used in the sciences is equivalent to your word Fact.

Now, let’s turn to humans. Humans are built to believe. This phenomenon has been well studied. Humans create belief systems in their childhood, from the ages of roughly 4 to 6 years of age until they are pre-teens. These belief systems are based on best guesses, things parents tell them, things people of authority tell them, things they read about or hear about in school, at religious gatherings, events, or at play.

These early childhood beliefs are strongly held. Even if a child is taught that these beliefs are incorrect, the child will retain them into adulthood. As adults, the beliefs learned in childhood will continue to affect adult’s thoughts and emotions. Since humans are built to react with their emotions, rather than with their intellect, then their actions and activities are directed by the beliefs developed in early childhood.

Another strong emotion is that of belonging. As a small child we are handed from mother to father to sisters and brothers and aunts and uncles and friends and persons close to the family. It is in this stage of our lives when we learn ‘Us’ and ‘Them.’ Throughout childhood and into adulthood, we retain a strong sense of the greater family unit. If this sense of family is threatened, we humans will respond emotionally, often either fighting to retain it or withdrawing emotionally from the threatening situation. This is why shunning is such a strong punishment. The separation from family and friends causes extreme emotional trauma.

So, if you come from a family that is even moderately close, and that family is religiously oriented, then you will treat a threat to your family’s religion as an attack on your family. You will either defend your family, or withdrawing emotionally from the situation. Either way, this is not a situation that is supportive of you, the individual, or your extended family. You will attempt to resolve this situation, using whatever tools area available to you.

Unfortunately gender dysphoria, or whatever else you wish to call it, is strongly proscribed by most religions. By ‘coming out’ you place yourself at odds with whatever belief system espoused by your family’s religion. They are now caught in the same dilemma as you are. They must choose between you and the extended family including their commonly shared belief system, which you are confronting. Unfortunately, in too many instances, the extended family and their shared belief system wins ... even though it can be demonstrated that the religious tenets that have been violated are invalid.

Thus, you are caught between the reality of the universe and the very foundations of you as a person. You are your belief systems. The universe exists. Perhaps, for the first time in your life, you have an opportunity to consider the beliefs, understandings, and attitudes that are you. You have the chance to hold your entire being up to the cold hard light of the stars, and reconsider who and what you are.

This is a most dangerous time for you. Everything you’ve ever known, or felt, or believed is falling down all around you. You don’t know where to turn, who to trust, or how to proceed. Obviously, you need professional assistance to help guide you through this trying time in your life. Your goal is to find the real you, which has been hidden within the shell you have presented to the world throughout your life. You are breaking out of that shell, entering the next phase of your life. Some of what is you is wrong, but most of you is just fine. You’ve just got to take the time to sort it all out.

It’s so easily said ...”Sort it all out.” Yet, it is difficult to do. However, if you have the strength and the courage to persevere, you will find who you were meant to be. Then, perhaps you can begin to rebuild other aspects of your life.

Best of all things, Dorothy. Our thoughts and our love go with you.